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Smiley Faces:

I was on the date from Hell tonight. It was Bonnie's idea. Bonnie works with us part-time. We all barely hang out with her that much. So you can imagine my shock of seeing her come up next to me during lunch earlier today.

"Hey Bonnie!" I said to her in shock. "What's up?" The conversation started out normal and causal. But then came the shocker. I noticed it in Bonnie's tone as well. She said that she had a friend that had a huge crush on me.

"Okay..." I said to her. "Really now?"

"Yes!" Bonnie said quickly. I was pleasantly, but still a little suspicious. There were some facts I had to find out first.

"What is your friend's name?" I asked.

"Bette!" Bonnie replied.

"Does she work here?" I asked her.

"No," she said. I relaxed some, but didn't show it. This is both a good and bad thing. Good because takes away some of the tension work brings. Bad because you don't know what you're up against. Aw, screw it! I'll take a chance with it. Might be fun.

"So," I said to Bonnie. "Does Bette want me to take her out on a date or something?"

"Yes!" my co-worker said quickly. Then she grabbed me by my hands. I was really shocked by this. Oh wow! Bonnie's really serious. Must be bad. Really bad...

"Bette has never really had a date," she explained. "She hasn't even had a stable boyfriend. So I'm begging, take her out tonight. You don't even have to see her again afterwards. Just do this for me! Please, I'm begging you!" It's that bad! What can I say to her? Rejection was not an option here. Well, there was only one thing to say to a request like that.

"Okay," I said almost without thinking. "I'll do it!" Bonnie's eyes lit up in delight.

"Oh thank you, Greg!" she exclaimed to me in joy. Then she hugged me wildly. I looked up at the ceiling in worry. Oh crap! What have I gotten myself into now? Oh well. How bad could it be?

Note to self, don't go on dates with outside friends of co-workers. My date was terrible. Mind you, Bette was a nice girl. She looked fairly average looking. Short brown hair in boyish cut, light hazel eyes, healthy looking tan, and the body of a dancer. Bette was dressed up as if she was going to the office for work. To me, she looked like Jennifer Beals' character on the L-Word. Bette was a nice and quiet. Maybe a bit too nice and quiet. The date was just dull. The only problem with Bette that I had was that I couldn't connect with her at all. It was as if we were from two different planets. Our personalities didn't mix at all.

I took Bette out to dinner at my usual place. Bette seemed okay with it. I kept getting the feeling that she didn't want to be here however. I tried to ignore it, but it was nagging in the back of my head. Dinner was the most silent I had in my life. Bette and I didn't even look at each other the whole time. The waiter was no help to us either. On a scale of one to ten on dinner dates I rate tonight a 2.5. There was just nothing there for us. I was even beginning wonder what she even saw in me in the first place. I mean, I'm a decent attractive guy. But why me with her? I just couldn't figure it out.

She took me back to her place and we were treated to more awkward silence and not knowing what to do next. This date was just a dull downward spiral. But then, some relief came. The power in the city all went out that night. (It wasn't a real shock to behold at all. The people at the power company do this sort of thing during the spring and summer to keep updating the power to make it more "green." It's a nuisance if you ask me.) Bette and I looked up.

"Power's out." I said trying a last-effort attempt to make conversation with this woman.

"Yeah..." she mumbled to me. But that was it. We were back at square one once again. Awkward silence and nothing in common. Sigh If only there was some way to...

Then, my cell phone rang loudly. We both quickly looked up at my ringtone, "The Stroke" by Billy Squirer. "Oh," I said quickly. "That's me. Hang on!" I answered me phone right on the spot.

"Hello?" I said.

"Greg!" a familiar voice cried in worry on the other end. My eyes grew wide in surprise.

"Morgan?" I asked in shock. "How did you get this number?"

"I broke into my mom's office and got you're number!" she said frantically.

"Okay," I said calmly. "What's wrong?"

"The power's out and I'm scared!" Morgan whimpered to me. "Please hurry and come over! I'm too scared to stay alone in the dark!" Something sounded a little off with that statement. She's nineteen years old and almost independent of her mother. But, I smiled to myself kindly and decided to check things out to see if she was alright.

"Okay Morgan," I said to her. "I'll be right over."

"Oh thanks, Greg!" she said to me. Then we hung up. I turned back to Bette. She was looking at me with a little worry in her eyes. (Ha! At last, a little emotion from her after a long night of dull awkwardness.) Well, time to end this date quick and painlessly.

"Listen Bette," I said to her trying to sound as nice as possible. "My boss's daughter seems to be afraid of the dark. She's a young woman in college. She called me out of nervous fear of what would happen next to her. I have to go and see to her." Bette nodded at me in silence.

"Okay," my date said. "I understand."

"So, I'll call you, then?" I asked.

"Yeah," Bette agreed in a neutral tone. I blew her a kiss and headed out the door. Whew! That didn't hurt at all. I guess I'll have to thank Morgan later for being such a lifesaver.

But What Did You Do?