(#) gamemaster101 2008-09-18I will give you a review, I happen to think that your story is very well thought out and that the changes that you have made so far have all been in good taste. You've also managed to very convincingly add the H/Hr to the story well.
(#) whatareyouevensaying 2008-09-19Good work breaking up that kiss. It'd be a bit strange if their first kiss involved Harry looking like a Weasley.
I really enjoyed this update, but my one piece of criticism is something I can't help but offer to a lot of authors: Do you really have to use the nickname 'Mione? It's never mentioned in canon, and it sounds incredibly awkward when said aloud.
Looking forward to more.
(#) sparky40sw 2008-09-21Please do feel free to make more changes - most anything you do would be better than the original. By having the logical and proper couple asa the leading characters, working together with intelligence, you have already improved things by 80%.
this is a well written, enjoyable story, and I am glad that you are continuing it.
thanks for sharing
- I love this story. It's book 7 done the right way. You'll have to drift from canon more sooner or later, which is fine by me since I didn't like canon too much. I don't see Ron taking the growing relationship between Harry and Hermione very well and staying with them on the adventure. He's too hot headed, so it looks like you'll reach the point of Ron leaving them, which will mess up the entire original plot. Of course it all depends on how you do this. I'm looking forward to more of this and seeing H/Hr getting together. Hopefully it won't take the whole story to reach that point. :-)
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