Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Forget About The Dirty Looks
Chapter 24
Gerard’s POV
"Leave Out All The Rest":http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sl02FgOuG0c
I unlocked the door and stepped into the apartment and moved aside letting Frank in, then closing the door. Neither of us spoke, we couldn’t, we didn’t know what to say and that was an unmentioned understanding. I watched as he was still soaked in her blood went into the hall, I heard him open the door to his bedroom. I walked to the one I shared…with her. My heart skipped a beat as she floated into my mind. I turned on the light and looked around. The room smelled of her and I couldn’t hold in the tears, that I didn’t know I still had. I looked around the room fighting her voice that was echoing in my head. I noticed and envelope leaning against the stereo and slowly walked to it and picked it up to see my name written in her writing on it. I sobbed, I wasn’t able to open it yet. I held it to my chest my eyes wandering over the room. I glanced at the stereo and it was blinking pause, I pressed play and a some what soothing but sad music filled the room. I heard Frank walk in and I turned to face him. His eyes where red and cheeks stained with fresh tears, he was holding an envelope in his right hand. I nodded to the bed and we both sat down and took deep breaths as we opened our letters reading them silently.
I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here
Frank:
I know a thousand questions are racing through your mind. I want to say please don’t blame yourself or each other. Your love and friendship with one another is better then that, it’s better then me. I chose this as it was the only option, the only peace for me. I couldn’t live anymore knowing what pain I caused you two. Don’t say I didn’t, I know I did. I could see both of you, feel both of you growing more un happy with the idea of us.
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
It wasn’t working anymore. None of us could end it, we didn’t know how maybe we didn’t want to out of fear. When I found out that I was pregnant I was scared, but yet excited. I had convinced myself that it would be okay, this baby would be so lucky to have three parents to love and protect him or her. As time went on the truth came crashing down on me. It wouldn’t work. I wanted a real family, my baby and my love. I could tell that’s what you where wanting too but didn’t or maybe couldn’t say it. I knew from the start that it was your baby Frank.
And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
That night that I told you I loved you, I meant it. I just wanted you, but I was still attracted to Gerard and cared for him on some level. It killed me betraying you like that but I was selfish. I know that now and I am truly sorry. That’s why when we where together. I always made sure it was you that shared THAT moment with me. That it was something special that only you and I could share and hoped he wouldn’t notice. When Gerard started to change his mind about the baby it made me feel worse more guilty like he figured out the secret. Then when I lost our baby it was devastating like I lost us, like I lost the only chance for us. I tried to pretend that everything was okay and go on with our lives but it become too hard. I wanted to tell you that I love you with all my heart but I didn’t know how and I couldn’t crush Gerard, I love him not like you but still I care about him and I couldn’t do it. So my only other choice was to leave you both. I couldn’t live with out you so I had to leave you. I hope you understand, and I pray that you can forgive me…someday. I am sorry but this was the only way.
I love you always,
Drew
Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made
I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
Gerard:
First off, this isn’t your fault or his, neither of you did anything wrong. It was me, I couldn’t hid the pain any longer. Or ignore your pain or his. I know you both tried to hide it but I could still see and feel it. I know things where falling apart this perfect plan wasn’t working for any of us anymore. I should have done something about it sooner instead of faking it. I know that you feel the same way, I know that you felt me slipping away.
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
We are both good at faking happiness and that I think, was our killing point. I know you love me on some level and I love you on one as well its just not the same one. I know that you realized this and still played along to satisfy me and him, while all the while it was killing you. I am so sorry, I let my selfishness get in the way and I can’t take that back. I can tell by the way you look at me you know that I truly loved him and only him. I just never knew how to say it, I was scared to crush you even though lying was dong it too even worse maybe. I have betrayed you, lied to you and pushed you away I beg for your forgiveness and hope you see why I had to do this. It was the only way I could leave. I couldn’t hurt you but I couldn’t be with out him. I think we always knew that in some way but couldn’t admit it or was to caught in the moment of the three of us to realize it.
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
It all got to much for both of us to hide or deal with, and I couldn’t hurt either of you anymore this was my way out, my way of leaving so I couldn’t hurt you by telling you my real feelings. I am so sorry, hate me if you must but I do care about you, I am so sorry.
Please forgive me:
Drew
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are
Gerard’s POV
"Leave Out All The Rest":http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sl02FgOuG0c
I unlocked the door and stepped into the apartment and moved aside letting Frank in, then closing the door. Neither of us spoke, we couldn’t, we didn’t know what to say and that was an unmentioned understanding. I watched as he was still soaked in her blood went into the hall, I heard him open the door to his bedroom. I walked to the one I shared…with her. My heart skipped a beat as she floated into my mind. I turned on the light and looked around. The room smelled of her and I couldn’t hold in the tears, that I didn’t know I still had. I looked around the room fighting her voice that was echoing in my head. I noticed and envelope leaning against the stereo and slowly walked to it and picked it up to see my name written in her writing on it. I sobbed, I wasn’t able to open it yet. I held it to my chest my eyes wandering over the room. I glanced at the stereo and it was blinking pause, I pressed play and a some what soothing but sad music filled the room. I heard Frank walk in and I turned to face him. His eyes where red and cheeks stained with fresh tears, he was holding an envelope in his right hand. I nodded to the bed and we both sat down and took deep breaths as we opened our letters reading them silently.
I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
Cause no one else cared
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving
When I'm done here
Frank:
I know a thousand questions are racing through your mind. I want to say please don’t blame yourself or each other. Your love and friendship with one another is better then that, it’s better then me. I chose this as it was the only option, the only peace for me. I couldn’t live anymore knowing what pain I caused you two. Don’t say I didn’t, I know I did. I could see both of you, feel both of you growing more un happy with the idea of us.
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
It wasn’t working anymore. None of us could end it, we didn’t know how maybe we didn’t want to out of fear. When I found out that I was pregnant I was scared, but yet excited. I had convinced myself that it would be okay, this baby would be so lucky to have three parents to love and protect him or her. As time went on the truth came crashing down on me. It wouldn’t work. I wanted a real family, my baby and my love. I could tell that’s what you where wanting too but didn’t or maybe couldn’t say it. I knew from the start that it was your baby Frank.
And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest
That night that I told you I loved you, I meant it. I just wanted you, but I was still attracted to Gerard and cared for him on some level. It killed me betraying you like that but I was selfish. I know that now and I am truly sorry. That’s why when we where together. I always made sure it was you that shared THAT moment with me. That it was something special that only you and I could share and hoped he wouldn’t notice. When Gerard started to change his mind about the baby it made me feel worse more guilty like he figured out the secret. Then when I lost our baby it was devastating like I lost us, like I lost the only chance for us. I tried to pretend that everything was okay and go on with our lives but it become too hard. I wanted to tell you that I love you with all my heart but I didn’t know how and I couldn’t crush Gerard, I love him not like you but still I care about him and I couldn’t do it. So my only other choice was to leave you both. I couldn’t live with out you so I had to leave you. I hope you understand, and I pray that you can forgive me…someday. I am sorry but this was the only way.
I love you always,
Drew
Don't be afraid
I've taken my beating
I've shared what I made
I'm strong on the surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me
I want you to know
Gerard:
First off, this isn’t your fault or his, neither of you did anything wrong. It was me, I couldn’t hid the pain any longer. Or ignore your pain or his. I know you both tried to hide it but I could still see and feel it. I know things where falling apart this perfect plan wasn’t working for any of us anymore. I should have done something about it sooner instead of faking it. I know that you feel the same way, I know that you felt me slipping away.
When my time comes
Forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some
Reasons to be missed
We are both good at faking happiness and that I think, was our killing point. I know you love me on some level and I love you on one as well its just not the same one. I know that you realized this and still played along to satisfy me and him, while all the while it was killing you. I am so sorry, I let my selfishness get in the way and I can’t take that back. I can tell by the way you look at me you know that I truly loved him and only him. I just never knew how to say it, I was scared to crush you even though lying was dong it too even worse maybe. I have betrayed you, lied to you and pushed you away I beg for your forgiveness and hope you see why I had to do this. It was the only way I could leave. I couldn’t hurt you but I couldn’t be with out him. I think we always knew that in some way but couldn’t admit it or was to caught in the moment of the three of us to realize it.
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
It all got to much for both of us to hide or deal with, and I couldn’t hurt either of you anymore this was my way out, my way of leaving so I couldn’t hurt you by telling you my real feelings. I am so sorry, hate me if you must but I do care about you, I am so sorry.
Please forgive me:
Drew
Forgetting
All the hurt inside
You've learned to hide so well
Pretending
Someone else can come and save me from myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are
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