Categories > Original > Romance > Simple Pleasures
Reviews
Simple Pleasures
(#) Ithilwen 2006-03-12
First paragraph -- very nice. Uncomplicated, but it sets the stage quite well.
The word "periwinkle" seems to evoke gentleness. Is that what you're going for?
Great closing. Really makes me wonder what's going to happen next, and whether "a few years" was the deceptive part of the sentence.
Grammar etc:
"Stripped suit," should be "striped suit."
"wine stained" should be "wine-stained"Author's response
Sheesh, it's taken me forever to figure out how to respond to reviews, sorry. Thank you for this! Yes, I was going for a mild hint of gentleness in Dimitri. Rather, innocence.
I fixed the grammar mistakes - thank you for pointing them out!Simple Pleasures
(#) shamefullyyours 2006-05-15
I like it, you don't see many stories from the prohibition age and its a healthy and fresh change. I like that the main character is also original, as well as his choppy speech. Additionally, I like that she calls him "ducky", it just struck me as interesting. In all, it's interesting and leaves a lot to the imagination, like what's going to happen next.
Good stuffAuthor's response
Heh, sorry it's taken so long to figure out how to reply to reviews here. I'm such a newbie sometimes. Anyway, I'm really glad you liked it and thank you! I was doing a lot of research in the 1920s era last semester, so when the idea for this story popped into my head, it just sort of settled in the decade. Trying to incorporate the slang of the era without making it sound forced is a chore though.
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