Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Tell Me My Life
brendon;
“London,” he said. “Maybe Bess can help us when we get to London.”
I sighed. London. We'd traveled all the way to Liverpool and back, and now he wanted to go to London. I was only humoring him, as for all we knew they could have taken her out of the country like we did. We could be looking on the wrong side of the world. I was humoring William, because I knew it was over.
“London, yeah. Maybe.”
This time, William sighed. “Bren, don't start this. I know it's hard, not knowing and all, but we have to keep trying.” I could hear hurt in his voice. William knew exactly what I was feeling.
“The problem,” I said, frustrated, “is that I do know.”
“You don't, Brendon, and you never will if we don't keep looking. Now, call Bess and tell her we'll be in the city within the hour. Ask her if she's noticed anything suspicious.”
Annoyed, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed our old friend's number. She wouldn't help us. Too much to risk. “We're wasting time, William,” I muttered as the phone rang.
From the corner of my eye I saw William shake his head. “What if she's waiting for you?”
-----
katelynn;
My very first thought was, wow, dying is easy. A glance at the filthy, cracked surface of the mirror showed me nothing but my own stunned face. So I looked down.
The milky white arms holding my waist, I could recognize them immediately. The shard of mirror clattered noisily to the floor and I leaned back into the faceless embrace.
“We have got to get out of here.”
-------
brendon;
William and I stepped out onto the porch of the house, followed by our friend Bess, who was smiling sympathetically.
“I'm so sorry I can't help you both. But... I just can't go chasing after them, you know?”
William nodded. “Of course we understand. But you will tell us if you see anything, right? That would be more than enough help.”
“Absolutely,” she replied warmly. “Any anything else you need, as well. A place to stay or something, I mean. I hope you find her soon.”
I felt her hand touch my arm and looked up to meet her sad gaze. Since we'd been in London, I don't think I spoke one whole sentence. For me it was just... one more city my Katelynn wasn't in. One more day wasted on being alive. Or whatever I was by then.
“Thanks,” I muttered, averting my eyes once again. I could feel her staring for a second, before she turned back to William.
“Right, well good luck, Bill. And please come back some day soon. My door is always open to you and your family.”
“Thank you so much, Bess. I guess we'll go now, so goodbye.”
William was still saying goodbyes when I gave up on the conversation and descended the front steps. I shoved my hands in my jacket pocket and started walking to where we had parked the car. William soon caught up with me, looping his arm loosely around my shoulders as we walked.
“We'll have to come visit more often,” he said conversationally.
I didn't answer. I enjoyed the company of our friend, but I knew I would never see her again. As soon as William let me give up and go home, I'd find a way to leave this stupid, inconsequential world for good. Honestly, I couldn't wait. Just thinking about the relief that was coming was enough to make me smile for the first time in days.
“Sometimes,” William said quietly, drawing me from my lovely thoughts, “I can't tell what you're thinking. But I can tell I don't want you to be thinking it, you know?”
I merely shrugged, quickening my pace. He matched it easily, grabbing my arm and turning me around.
“Seriously, Brendon. It's not like I don't know what you're going through. You have to deal with it somehow. You have to live with it.”
“I don't plan on living with it, but I do plan on dealing with it,” I confessed quickly, smiling bitterly again. “You want to help me get over this? Then let me give up. Let me go home.”
William rolled his eyes. “Shut the fuck up, Bren. You don't even know what happened to her yet. For all you know, she's--”
“For all I know she's been dead for days!” I shouted, drawing stares from the passersby. But I didn't care at all. “For all I know her body is in a thousand pieces somewhere, and that bastard Gerard is watching us and laughing his ass off. I get that you don't want it to be over. I don't want it to be over either, William, but it is! It's time to forget about it.”
With that, I wrenched my arm out of his grasp and started walking again. I passed the car. It didn't matter. I didn't need to go home to do what I had to do. My best friend stayed rooted to the spot, looking stunned and hurt. That didn't matter either.
“So you're just... you're just going to forget?” he called after me. “Without even knowing, you're going to forget about her?”
“I don't have a choice,” I muttered, knowing he could still hear me, even from this far away. “I don't fucking have a... a...” Then, something caught me eye.
A man. He was walking on the other side of the street, heading the opposite way very quickly. His tattered black coat trailed after him like a cape, and he had a hat pulled down low on his head. Without thinking, I bolted into the street after him. I heard William shouting at me, and car horns screaming, but I didn't care about them. Breaks screeching against the pavement, angry shouts directed at me. All the while I was running after this white-skinned man.
So, it wasn't over yet.
William eventually caught up to me and realized what was going on with a gasp and a look that screamed “I told you so!”. Silently, we followed the man to the subway platform and watched closely to see his destination. As soon as we were sure of where to go, we left at a run for the car. William drove, following the directions on the subway map to the station where the man would get off. When he did, we got back on his tail. Hours and cities later, the man approached a huge, old Victorian mansion. The place reeked of Sangladri.
“This is definitely it,” William said, scrunching up his nose in disgust. I nodded, my eyes wide as I stared at the building from about a hundred yards out. Now that we were here, I worried about what we'd find inside. What if she was dead? Would there even been anything left of her? Shaking the thoughts from my head, I started the last stretch of our journey with a long stride.
As we approached the mansion, I wondered how we would ever find her without being caught. William and I stalked around the house, brainstorming ways to get in, for nearly half an hour. I knew we were wasting time, but I could see no other option. Until William stopped in his tracks and pointed up.
“There! The only light in the whole house, you see? That must be where they've got her, none of them need light to see.”
“Yeah!” I agreed, suddenly excited. “Yeah, let's... let's go. I guess we have to climb.” I gestured toward a tall trellis running up the side of the mansion.
I went first, scaling the house as quickly and quietly as I could manage. When I reached the window ledge, I hesitantly looked around the room, trying not to be seen in case someone else was in there. It appeared empty at first, so I undid the latch and pulled myself in, William right behind me.
Nothing happened when my feet touched the floor. Nothing changed. The light in the room was coming from one small candle, which flickered and faltered continuously from a small table on which also rested an old leather-bound book and a dirty, cracked crystal glass of water. Beside the table was an unmade bed. And, hidden under the horrid Sangladri smell was a trace of the familiar, sweet fragrance that I had such an affinity to. I closed my eyes, inhaling, trying to extract that perfect smell from the air and store it inside me.
And then I heard William speak from behind me.
“Katelynn?” he whispered, making me turn around sharply. “Why are you doing that?” His voice shook slightly.
I followed his gaze to the corner of the room. My eyes traveled down a huge framed mirror, to the face reflected in it. With a flash of terror, I recognized the expression on that beautiful face. I'd worn it earlier that day. It was an expression of bitter delight, horrible relief. Katelynn sat with her back to us, holding a jagged piece of the broken mirror in front of her heart. She had paused upon hearing William's question, but I didn't see a break in her concentration from the reflected picture of her eyes. Without having to think, I walked toward her and sat behind her, wrapping my arms around her tiny waist and pressing my face into her back. The familiar smell of her was strong now.
“Please put it down. Please.” I was begging, and to my surprise she obliged, dropping the crude weapon and leaning back into my arms.
“We have got to get out of here,” she whispered. Her lifeless voice broke my shattered heart even more as I nodded slowly.
Then William spoke up, urgently. “Bren, I think they're coming for her. I can hear them in the hall.”
“No!” Katelynn suddenly gasped, jumping up and facing me. “Please don't let them find you, Brendon. They can't have you!”
“Shh,” I tried to calm her down, pulling her into my arms. “They won't find me, love. And they won't have you, either. William, what do we do?” The last part came out more desperate than I'd intended.
“I—I don't know. You take her and run. Get the hell away from this place. I'll make sure they don't--”
“Someone's in there!” We heard from the hallway. Katelynn whimpered quietly and my grip on her tightened.
“Brendon!” William shouted. “Go, now! I have to--” He was cut off yet again by thunderous footsteps, and then the door being thrown open.
“Go!” He shouted, before shifting into a fighting stance in front of Katelynn and I. I looked behind me to the window. It didn't take much to realize that I wouldn't be able to get Katelynn down there safely.
When I turned back to the scene in the room, I realized that the amount of shit we were in had just tripled. I counted twelve of the horrid creatures, slowly spreading into a circle around us. Joining us in the center of the circle was the most hated face I had ever known.
“Beckett, Urie! So nice of you to come by. Unfortunately, we're a little busy tonight. So if you don't mind--”
William had lunged at Gerard suddenly, knocking him down. The rest of the Sangladri took that as a cue to start fighting as well, and that's when I decided on a plan.
“Can you trust me, Katelynn?” I asked hurriedly. She nodded vigorously, tears streaming down her face. While all attention was still on William, I grabbed her and ran straight through the fight and to the door. I made it to the hallway, but I knew we were being followed. I ran with every ounce of strength I had, not knowing the way to an exit but determined to get Katelynn to safety none the less.
“But William--!” she shouted, realizing what was happening.
“I know,” I breathed out. “I have to get you out first.”
“But--”
“Trust me!” I shouted, rounding a corner and finding a stairway. I jumped down it, praying for a way out of the house. Katelynn sobbed loudly, burying her face into my neck, but didn't say anything else.
I kept running blindly through the house, always aware of the footsteps behind me, trying to track my path. And then I saw it-- the massive wooden front door. I bolted toward it, ripping it off it's hinges in my haste to open it. It fell loudly to the ground as I sprinted away from the house with my life in my arms.
Relief pulsed through my body as the house fell from my sight. But of course, there was still William.
I'm not too good with action scenes. Or any scenes, for that matter. sorry i take so long to do anything.
xoxo
“London,” he said. “Maybe Bess can help us when we get to London.”
I sighed. London. We'd traveled all the way to Liverpool and back, and now he wanted to go to London. I was only humoring him, as for all we knew they could have taken her out of the country like we did. We could be looking on the wrong side of the world. I was humoring William, because I knew it was over.
“London, yeah. Maybe.”
This time, William sighed. “Bren, don't start this. I know it's hard, not knowing and all, but we have to keep trying.” I could hear hurt in his voice. William knew exactly what I was feeling.
“The problem,” I said, frustrated, “is that I do know.”
“You don't, Brendon, and you never will if we don't keep looking. Now, call Bess and tell her we'll be in the city within the hour. Ask her if she's noticed anything suspicious.”
Annoyed, I pulled my phone out of my pocket and dialed our old friend's number. She wouldn't help us. Too much to risk. “We're wasting time, William,” I muttered as the phone rang.
From the corner of my eye I saw William shake his head. “What if she's waiting for you?”
-----
katelynn;
My very first thought was, wow, dying is easy. A glance at the filthy, cracked surface of the mirror showed me nothing but my own stunned face. So I looked down.
The milky white arms holding my waist, I could recognize them immediately. The shard of mirror clattered noisily to the floor and I leaned back into the faceless embrace.
“We have got to get out of here.”
-------
brendon;
William and I stepped out onto the porch of the house, followed by our friend Bess, who was smiling sympathetically.
“I'm so sorry I can't help you both. But... I just can't go chasing after them, you know?”
William nodded. “Of course we understand. But you will tell us if you see anything, right? That would be more than enough help.”
“Absolutely,” she replied warmly. “Any anything else you need, as well. A place to stay or something, I mean. I hope you find her soon.”
I felt her hand touch my arm and looked up to meet her sad gaze. Since we'd been in London, I don't think I spoke one whole sentence. For me it was just... one more city my Katelynn wasn't in. One more day wasted on being alive. Or whatever I was by then.
“Thanks,” I muttered, averting my eyes once again. I could feel her staring for a second, before she turned back to William.
“Right, well good luck, Bill. And please come back some day soon. My door is always open to you and your family.”
“Thank you so much, Bess. I guess we'll go now, so goodbye.”
William was still saying goodbyes when I gave up on the conversation and descended the front steps. I shoved my hands in my jacket pocket and started walking to where we had parked the car. William soon caught up with me, looping his arm loosely around my shoulders as we walked.
“We'll have to come visit more often,” he said conversationally.
I didn't answer. I enjoyed the company of our friend, but I knew I would never see her again. As soon as William let me give up and go home, I'd find a way to leave this stupid, inconsequential world for good. Honestly, I couldn't wait. Just thinking about the relief that was coming was enough to make me smile for the first time in days.
“Sometimes,” William said quietly, drawing me from my lovely thoughts, “I can't tell what you're thinking. But I can tell I don't want you to be thinking it, you know?”
I merely shrugged, quickening my pace. He matched it easily, grabbing my arm and turning me around.
“Seriously, Brendon. It's not like I don't know what you're going through. You have to deal with it somehow. You have to live with it.”
“I don't plan on living with it, but I do plan on dealing with it,” I confessed quickly, smiling bitterly again. “You want to help me get over this? Then let me give up. Let me go home.”
William rolled his eyes. “Shut the fuck up, Bren. You don't even know what happened to her yet. For all you know, she's--”
“For all I know she's been dead for days!” I shouted, drawing stares from the passersby. But I didn't care at all. “For all I know her body is in a thousand pieces somewhere, and that bastard Gerard is watching us and laughing his ass off. I get that you don't want it to be over. I don't want it to be over either, William, but it is! It's time to forget about it.”
With that, I wrenched my arm out of his grasp and started walking again. I passed the car. It didn't matter. I didn't need to go home to do what I had to do. My best friend stayed rooted to the spot, looking stunned and hurt. That didn't matter either.
“So you're just... you're just going to forget?” he called after me. “Without even knowing, you're going to forget about her?”
“I don't have a choice,” I muttered, knowing he could still hear me, even from this far away. “I don't fucking have a... a...” Then, something caught me eye.
A man. He was walking on the other side of the street, heading the opposite way very quickly. His tattered black coat trailed after him like a cape, and he had a hat pulled down low on his head. Without thinking, I bolted into the street after him. I heard William shouting at me, and car horns screaming, but I didn't care about them. Breaks screeching against the pavement, angry shouts directed at me. All the while I was running after this white-skinned man.
So, it wasn't over yet.
William eventually caught up to me and realized what was going on with a gasp and a look that screamed “I told you so!”. Silently, we followed the man to the subway platform and watched closely to see his destination. As soon as we were sure of where to go, we left at a run for the car. William drove, following the directions on the subway map to the station where the man would get off. When he did, we got back on his tail. Hours and cities later, the man approached a huge, old Victorian mansion. The place reeked of Sangladri.
“This is definitely it,” William said, scrunching up his nose in disgust. I nodded, my eyes wide as I stared at the building from about a hundred yards out. Now that we were here, I worried about what we'd find inside. What if she was dead? Would there even been anything left of her? Shaking the thoughts from my head, I started the last stretch of our journey with a long stride.
As we approached the mansion, I wondered how we would ever find her without being caught. William and I stalked around the house, brainstorming ways to get in, for nearly half an hour. I knew we were wasting time, but I could see no other option. Until William stopped in his tracks and pointed up.
“There! The only light in the whole house, you see? That must be where they've got her, none of them need light to see.”
“Yeah!” I agreed, suddenly excited. “Yeah, let's... let's go. I guess we have to climb.” I gestured toward a tall trellis running up the side of the mansion.
I went first, scaling the house as quickly and quietly as I could manage. When I reached the window ledge, I hesitantly looked around the room, trying not to be seen in case someone else was in there. It appeared empty at first, so I undid the latch and pulled myself in, William right behind me.
Nothing happened when my feet touched the floor. Nothing changed. The light in the room was coming from one small candle, which flickered and faltered continuously from a small table on which also rested an old leather-bound book and a dirty, cracked crystal glass of water. Beside the table was an unmade bed. And, hidden under the horrid Sangladri smell was a trace of the familiar, sweet fragrance that I had such an affinity to. I closed my eyes, inhaling, trying to extract that perfect smell from the air and store it inside me.
And then I heard William speak from behind me.
“Katelynn?” he whispered, making me turn around sharply. “Why are you doing that?” His voice shook slightly.
I followed his gaze to the corner of the room. My eyes traveled down a huge framed mirror, to the face reflected in it. With a flash of terror, I recognized the expression on that beautiful face. I'd worn it earlier that day. It was an expression of bitter delight, horrible relief. Katelynn sat with her back to us, holding a jagged piece of the broken mirror in front of her heart. She had paused upon hearing William's question, but I didn't see a break in her concentration from the reflected picture of her eyes. Without having to think, I walked toward her and sat behind her, wrapping my arms around her tiny waist and pressing my face into her back. The familiar smell of her was strong now.
“Please put it down. Please.” I was begging, and to my surprise she obliged, dropping the crude weapon and leaning back into my arms.
“We have got to get out of here,” she whispered. Her lifeless voice broke my shattered heart even more as I nodded slowly.
Then William spoke up, urgently. “Bren, I think they're coming for her. I can hear them in the hall.”
“No!” Katelynn suddenly gasped, jumping up and facing me. “Please don't let them find you, Brendon. They can't have you!”
“Shh,” I tried to calm her down, pulling her into my arms. “They won't find me, love. And they won't have you, either. William, what do we do?” The last part came out more desperate than I'd intended.
“I—I don't know. You take her and run. Get the hell away from this place. I'll make sure they don't--”
“Someone's in there!” We heard from the hallway. Katelynn whimpered quietly and my grip on her tightened.
“Brendon!” William shouted. “Go, now! I have to--” He was cut off yet again by thunderous footsteps, and then the door being thrown open.
“Go!” He shouted, before shifting into a fighting stance in front of Katelynn and I. I looked behind me to the window. It didn't take much to realize that I wouldn't be able to get Katelynn down there safely.
When I turned back to the scene in the room, I realized that the amount of shit we were in had just tripled. I counted twelve of the horrid creatures, slowly spreading into a circle around us. Joining us in the center of the circle was the most hated face I had ever known.
“Beckett, Urie! So nice of you to come by. Unfortunately, we're a little busy tonight. So if you don't mind--”
William had lunged at Gerard suddenly, knocking him down. The rest of the Sangladri took that as a cue to start fighting as well, and that's when I decided on a plan.
“Can you trust me, Katelynn?” I asked hurriedly. She nodded vigorously, tears streaming down her face. While all attention was still on William, I grabbed her and ran straight through the fight and to the door. I made it to the hallway, but I knew we were being followed. I ran with every ounce of strength I had, not knowing the way to an exit but determined to get Katelynn to safety none the less.
“But William--!” she shouted, realizing what was happening.
“I know,” I breathed out. “I have to get you out first.”
“But--”
“Trust me!” I shouted, rounding a corner and finding a stairway. I jumped down it, praying for a way out of the house. Katelynn sobbed loudly, burying her face into my neck, but didn't say anything else.
I kept running blindly through the house, always aware of the footsteps behind me, trying to track my path. And then I saw it-- the massive wooden front door. I bolted toward it, ripping it off it's hinges in my haste to open it. It fell loudly to the ground as I sprinted away from the house with my life in my arms.
Relief pulsed through my body as the house fell from my sight. But of course, there was still William.
I'm not too good with action scenes. Or any scenes, for that matter. sorry i take so long to do anything.
xoxo
Sign up to rate and review this story