FicWad

this is just a short intro. I'll try and update regularly. :) reviews appreciated.

I stared down at my sopping wet black boots against the drenched pavement and sighed throught the slight quiver in my lip. It was pouring and I was miles away from home walking nowhere. I blamed myself for everything. I blamed myself for the heartache, the need for something to dull the pain I caused, and the addiction that was slowly killing the one person that meant the world to me. Stupid. I’m so stupid. My own stupid, selfish stupidity. Goddamnit. I wanted to cry. I wanted to bleed, I wanted to do anything but stand in the freezing rain and feel sorry for myself. I sighed and turned around back towards the direction of my house. She’d be waiting there for me, fucked up and pissed off. I was really in any emotional or physical shape to endure a herion influenced fight, but I had to choice. I created her, I had to destroy her. I walked up the steps to the old 2 bedroom single-wide and stared at the foggy, grim sky. Rain splattered on my face, making the hair all around to stick to my eyelids and cheeks. I sighed and opened the door to the small little trailor and took off my boots at the door. Riley was asleep on the couch…thank God. I took off my jacket and walked over to her twitching body. She’d passed out before she had a chance to take the needle out of her arm again. I pulled the syringe out of her arm and set it on the coffee table. Pulling out a cigarette from the Marlboro box out of my pocket I lit up and dragged my sleepy body into the bedroom. I flopped down on the bed and turned over onto my side taking deep drags from my cigarette. I stared at the nicotene ceiling. I wanted to cry. No. I can’t cry. I don’t cry. I won’t. I’ll…sleep…