Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Dead Roomate
Dead Roomate
3 reviews“Mercedes, Mercedes Ryans” I smiled, was it weird to think he was hot? He seriously is hot, and if he was alive I wouldn’t mind, wait stop, he is a dead teenaged boy in MY ROOM!
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Reviews
Dead Roomate
(#) Julianne 2009-05-09
Chuckle
Cute. I like it so far, but you might try breaking up the writing a bit more. I love you already for bothering with paragraphs ( :D ), but if you can view the story from a reader's perspective on here, do. Or create an alternate account.
Anyhows, your paragraphs are on separate lines, but not indented... just thought you ought to know.
The only complaint with the writing is the lack of commas when making quotes.Dead Roomate
(#) HellOnHigh9 2009-05-09
This is quite good, exactly like the mediator book series but good,Dead Roomate
(#) GayFace 2009-05-10
Ha ha, OK I'll edit all the mistakes out. I'll try and make the rest VERY different from the Mediator series. Or start again with a completely different more origional idea
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