Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > A Heart On The Mend

4. Accidentally in love

by Firith 0 reviews

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Crossover,Drama,Romance - Published: 2009-05-19 - Updated: 2009-05-19 - 1317 words - Complete

Little outbursts of jealousy like that weren’t something unusual in Faith, but this one in particular felt worse. It’s not like she could actually ask Ryan to stop having feelings for Keltie, is not like she could ask for explanations and Ryan would have to give her one. It’s not like she should have fallen for Ryan, even if she didn’t wanna admit it to herself. It’s not like she should be pregnant with his kid either.

Faith had a restless afternoon of half sleeping, half pacing around her apartment. At 7pm it was obvious she wasn’t resting and got in the shower. Her mind wandered scattered between Ryan, the baby, being sick and the patient that died that morning. For a moment, Faith actually considered taking Ryan’s advice and have someone fill in for her that night. She really wasn’t in the mood to work, but it was the only thing that made her stop thinking so much. And besides, Spencer was working too and he was one of the few that could help her.

After a quick bite, she made way to the hospital, getting there little before 8. Faith went to the emergency OR and saw Jon. Dr. Walker shared her shift as the anesthesiologist, and also was Spencer’s boyfriend. This made him basically her brother-in-law.

“Hey, Jon.” She greeted, forcing a smile.

“Good evening, miss Ash.” He said as response. “Everything good?”

“Yeah, how was the day?” She said walking into the little resting room the OR had.

“Quiet. As any other Monday.” Jon said falling on one of the couches as Faith straddled a bench. “Wentz closed up the last patient like half an hour ago and apparently there’s nothing left to operate.”

“Great.” Faith said rubbing her face. “I’ll send my intern to check with Way if there’s anything else to evaluate.”

Jon was about to say something when a thin shadow on the door made him stop and said something else. “I’ll go check on Spencer, he said he’d probably have to make a c-section and hasn’t called me back.” Jon stood up and headed for the door at the same time Faith looked up.

“Hi.” Ryan was there, leaning on the frame.

“Aren’t you supposed to be at home now?” Faith said, a little smile appearing on her lips.

Ryan straddled the same bench in front of her and held her hands, leaning his forehead on hers, looking into her eyes. Faith raised an eyebrow.


“Look, about earlier…” Ryan started.

“What happened earlier?” Faith asked confused.

“With Keltie, in the OR. I didn’t mean--”

“Okay, stop. You don’t have to apologize.” Faith said pulling away, only Ryan gripped her hands and kept her in place.

“I know I don’t. But I want to.” He said biting his lip. He wanted to say so much more, but couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Besides, I know you got upset.” He added with a half smile.

Faith chuckled. “Everything was upsetting me.” She lied. Or maybe not, but she was denying the fact it had bothered her way too much. Ryan shook his head.

“Doesn’t matter if it did. I’m sorry.”

“Apology accepted then.” Faith said and Ryan sighed, leaning his forehead on hers again.

He swallowed down everything else he wanted to say, make her understand why he was apologizing. Explain why he stayed 2 hours after his last procedure just to talk to her. But he didn’t. Instead, gripped her hands and pulled her a little closer, kissing her lips lightly. Faith smiled and kissed him back.

“Breakfast tomorrow?” He whispered.

“If you’re buying…” Faith said, closing her eyes and biting her lip.

“I’ll bring you a muffin.”



Both giggled. Ryan lifted Faith’s chin and kissed her again, thankful of being left alone in the small room. The day shift was leaving as the night shift was arriving, so they would be pretty much ignored for the next five minutes. It’s not like they were a secret, everyone knew about them, but it wasn’t very professional to go around the hospital making out.

“Dr. Ashley?” William interrupted their moment, blushing at realizing and stuttering an apology.

Faith smiled as Ryan looked down. “You already interrupted, Beckett. What is it?”

“Dr. Way was asking for you.”

“I’ll be right out.” Faith said and William trotted off without being said to. Ryan tensed up.

“Will you ever stop having to work with him every Monday?” He asked quietly.

“Why should I?” Faith watched Ryan bite the inside of his cheek and shrug.

“I don’t know. Given your background I don’t think is healthy.”

“Mikey and I manage.” She answered simply. Even if she knew Ryan was kind of right.

She and Dr. Michael Way shared a story that included a serious relationship that lasted over 2 years and never really ended. Almost 5 years after their break-up they were still sleeping together, even if Michael was married now. There were still moments of weakness when he’d come up with something to tell his wife and would get lost with Faith instead. Everything had stopped abruptly a couple of months ago though, when he found out his wife was pregnant with twins.

Faith acted like she didn’t care, but Ryan knew it would take only a few words from Mikey to have her back. And that scared the shit out of him. That’s why he had asked her to switch days with anyone, but she refused and Ryan didn’t push.

“I’ll let you get to work, then.” Ryan said hiding the bitterness in his voice.

“I’ll be waiting for my muffin tomorrow.” She chuckled, pecking his lips before standing up.

Ryan smiled and gave her a small nod before getting up himself. “I won’t forget.”

Faith clutched her stomach watching Ryan leave. Part of her wanted to stop him and tell him everything, so he could be there with her… but what for? If her suspicions were correct-- No, she shouldn’t be thinking about it now. First she had to talk to Spencer, get the ultrasound and then worry about what to tell Ryan, if anything at all.

Trudging to the ER, William appeared again, blushing slightly and not looking at her while he made a short list of the patients that needed surgical evaluation. Faith thought it was amusing, but the stuttering was getting on her nerves.

“Stop it.” She said and William stood there blinking. “Did you check on the patients?”

“Yes. All four of them. One of them could be discharged, two have to be moved to the 4th floor and I wanted to ask you about the forth one…”

“Sing…” Faith walked to the little exam room while William told her about the patient. An 87 years old woman with an acute arterial ischemia affecting her left leg. She should have been operated the day before, but she wasn’t. Why? That was the question William had. Faith found the answer written on the chart, with the spidery characters of Ryan’s handwriting. The family of the patient didn’t wanna make her go through surgery.

This is what you get when you get old, no one wants to do a thing for you. Faith thought as she pointed out the chart to William, telling him to write the new meds the patient should get and making a note for the nurse to contact the family. If they were rejecting the surgery they could very well take the lady back home and have her die there.

“There’s nothing worse than dying in a hospital.” William muttered and Faith could do more than agree. She had seen enough of it too.
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