Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Holly Evans and the Spiral Path
Who Are You
3 reviewsMcG decides Holly needs guidance, Hermione gets unwanted help from friends, plus Animagus Day
5Exciting
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and all related concepts are owned by someone who isn't me. I will never seek or accept money for the circulation of this work.
Holly Evans and the Spiral Path
Chapter 22: Who Are You
3rd January, 1994
Harry,
Weirdness is the best way to describe everyone's return to Dementorland.
Professor McGonagall had transported us back to Hogwarts by Apparation straight from the Atrium of the Ministry in London. While walking all the way back up to the castle, she was constantly mumbling about how she wasn't feeling in the least bit tired despite 'side-alonging' two criminals across the whole of Britain. Hermione reminded her that I was the criminal and she was the victim to which Prof McG very quickly turned to yell at us.
"If I discover either of you using handcuffs or...or chains in the next four years, I will reinstitute corporal punishments here at Hogwarts! Then you'll find out what punishment really is!"
"Um, Professor McGonagall? Not to distract from your fantasies but would you mind if we had a House-elf retrieve our trunks and pets from the Grangers, possibly leaving a note for Hermione's parents?"
"Oh, Holly you didn't just say that!"
We all stopped walking. Prof McG's shoulders just slumped.
"Yes, Miss Evans. That will be fine. Miss Granger, please write a note to inform your parents that you have been returned early to school to aid in a special project that was getting out of hand."
"But Professor, I can't lie to my parents."
"Not well, at any rate."
"Shush, Holly! Please!"
"You won't be lying. The special project is the re-education of one Holly Evans in the areas of morals, ethics and proper behavior! Miss Evans, you will be serving detention with me each weeknight starting at seven sharp for the next THREE MONTHS, wherein you will be schooled until ethics bleeds out your ears! I will consider Miss Granger's attendance to be optional, as she will be the teaching assistant."
"Professor, we've been involved with another special project..."
"Yes, Professor Lupin was quite enthusiastic (for him) when describing your Owl-shaped Patronus, Miss Evans. I don't believe you require any further instruction in the spell. I must say you both have impressed me with your drive to learn this very difficult magic. Should you maintain your skill in it until your OWL testing, I have no doubt the Patronus would garner an extra 10 points for the Defense practical exam. Should Miss Evans' instruction in other areas not take hold, I'm sure you'll be well-regarded in Azkaban for your O+."
"Cool. So. Detention?"
"An intervention! With reading! And testing!"
Everything else she said was mumbled, so I don't think she was talking to us. I can't say I'm surprised on the topic. In a way, I'm touched that Prof McG cares that much.
Before everyone else returned this afternoon on the Express, we had more weirdness. As Hermione and I were eating in the Great Hall, the Headmaster appeared behind me from nowhere.
"Miss Evans, you lied to me."
"Oi! Give a girl a warning, Professor!"
"I do not appreciate being lied to. I thought we agreed you would stay where it is safe."
"Well sir, safety is relative. My recent Divination work clearly indicated that I would be breaking the law this holiday, and I felt it was a better chance for it not to be for murder if I stayed away from the Dursleys. Besides, if you think about it, you weren't lied to."
"Oh? Perhaps you didn't lie, but you deceived me."
"Exactly. You were pranked!"
I smiled but that actually made him laugh. Freaky.
The last bit of weirdness isn't really odd but it is disturbing, I suppose. Everyone seemed to be in good spirits as they arrived for the Returning Feast, but slowly the mood seemed to be getting darker. Originally I thought it might be the Dementor influence, though they hadn't really moved in to re-siege the castle just yet, instead keeping a very wide orbit of the grounds while periodically dive-bombing the Forbidden Forest. Then I noticed a pattern to the change in mood. It started at the Hufflepuff table with a tight conversation surrounding Susan Bones, which then bounced over to the Gryffindors when Hannah sat with Neville for pudding. Soon after, the mood dropped amongst some Ravenclaws as Parvati caught up with her sister returning from the library. By the end of the feast some dozen or more students, mostly girls were giving me an evil eye. When I turned to look at Hermione, I recognised that she also had sensed the change, but her expression was more one of shame. Not embarrassment, like you've been caught in a human goof, but the shame of someone who was failing in the eyes of others. Before I could ask Hermione about it she had bolted from the table, saying she had to look up something in the library. I decided not to crowd her, given the looks I was receiving. Normally I could care less about others' opinions but Mrs. Granger's concerns came back to me, and I realised that just because I can ignore them doesn't mean it won't hurt Hermione.
After leaving the Great Hall I retrieved the Map from the Twins and checked up on Hermione remotely. She was in the library, occasionally moving to the stacks to acquire more books. I guess she really did have something on her mind.
Interestingly, I caught sight of another actor in our dramas whose movements drew my attention. The Marauders must have penetrated the Slytherin stronghold at some point, because I could see Pansy along with Bulstrode, Malfoy, Pucey, Bole and Flint all walking across the Slytherin common room but they disappeared into an unmarked space through a wall, indicating an unmapped room. After just a few minutes the others trailed out, but Pansy didn't. I've checked the Map several times this evening as I catch up on Arithmancy homework, and she hasn't emerged. Perhaps it's a safe room of some sort, as her entourage hadn't spent any time after depositing her within to attend to her.
Weird, wild stuff.
Holly
P.S.: Hagrid shared some disturbing news. Buckbeak's assault on Draco Malfoy is being handled by a hearing in April to determine if Bucky should be destroyed as an uncontrollable rogue monster. One would think if they thought Bucky was uncontrollable, they wouldn't wait four months with him out of control to determine that. Politically this is just stupid, but I'm not surprised Draco is taking out this vendetta to the fullest extent of his influence. He really has nothing else of his own experience to talk about. In the future, people will laugh at how vindictive he is getting about 'some animal scratching him'. I'm surprised Lucius is permitting this tantrum. I guess that counts as weird, too.
*
7th January, 1994
Harry,
I'm being left out of something on purpose. Hermione is on a mission, but she may also be getting hung up on her reputation.
When talking with her, she deflects any inquiry about her growing anxiety (or her quest) with other things of interest- Prof. Lupin has helped her find another Patronus form, an otter, but she's still having problems bringing it about; Hermione's been tired a lot lately, possibly owing to the near-death experience; she may have convinced Professors Flitwick and McGonagall to inspect my Firebolt for curses and the like during my ethics detentions, except she doesn't want them to do it in front of me while I read as it would be distracting from the purpose of the detention. Always she throws these other things out there to explain her discontent, but it's something else. Hermione is having nightmares, and my holding her only helps half of the time. She won't tell me what's wrong so I decided to get proactive.
Using my Turner time I spied in on some of the disgruntled who were giving me the evil eye during the Returning Feast. After a few missions, I was able to overhear this conversation:
Transcription: 6th January, 1994 starting 8:14 PM
Holly is Cloaked behind one of the stacks of books in the History section of the library. On the other side of the shelves, Draco Malfoy is hiding under a poorly-cast Disillusionment Charm, looking at a table where the Gryffindor Quidditch team including alternates is working on new plays. Ron Weasley is standing, gesturing with his hands to show some sort of tactical movement.
Draco: (whispering) "That's right, Weasley! Do everything you can. Your pathetic team won't have a chance against us next match. Use your hands, you simpleton. It's not like you can describe anything clearly with your mouth all stuffed with... food. Use your hands. Use them...use them..."
Transcription halted.
Newt! Not that one! After! The one after!
Sorry, Mum.
Transcription: 6th January, 1994 starting 8:33 PM
Holly is Cloaked behind one of the stacks of books in the Charms section of the library. On the other side of the shelves, Padma Patil is speaking quietly with Marietta Edgecombe. Both occasionally take a surreptitious look at Hermione, who is feverishly working on a scroll at a table, surrounded by 40 books.
Padma: "Just look at her. She is a fright. Whatever Evans did to her has played her nerves to her limit."
Marietta: "No, I don't think so. For all that you or I would be one step from a nervous breakdown if we looked like that; I think Granger is actually happy at the moment. She's on a mission of some sort. Just look at her eyes. Her hair may look like a used broom, but her eyes are lit up with something. Of course, if what they say happened really happened, I would be happily frazzled, too."
Padma: "Marietta, no one could give or receive that much pleasure, it is patently ridiculous. It is like I said; Evans tortured her somehow, but she is afraid to speak. I do not trust your opinion of her eyes, either. You have been obsessed with Cho since day one, convinced she is about to let you in to her underthings based upon 'that look in her eye'."
Marietta: (whinging a little) "She's close to breaking, I know it!"
Padma: "Marietta no, she is not. It's been four years. You are just a shield to keep away unwanted boys. Cho has no interest in pursuing your kind of relationship."
Marietta: "I found that same look in your eyes..."
Padma: "One time! And I keep telling you, it was just to keep you from slitting your wrists."
Marietta: "And the other time?"
Padma: "Curiosity. We barely had a chance to kiss each other the first time. I have a new experiment, now. Besides, the question of the moment is whether we need to save Hermione Granger from a domineering bisexual terror-monger or congratulate her for standing up for her beliefs as a lesbian. Either way, her life is at risk."
Marietta: "So, we confront her at the next study group?"
Padma: "Everyone who is concerned will be there; I think it is best that we act soon."
Transcription ends.
Arithmancy. I stopped going because they were talking above my skill level and I couldn't explain why I was studying it when I'm not in the class. Fourteen of them meet in a small classroom barely the size of our dorm. It's a tight space, making it hard to squeeze in, particularly under the Cloak. I'm not a ghost.
Newt? I have a mission for you.
Huzzah!
Holly
*
Transcription: 9th January, 1994 starting 4:01 PM
In the crowded mini-classroom for the Arithmancy study group, huddled around a long table are Padma Patil, Marietta Edgecombe, Susan Bones, Hannah Abbott, Morag MacDougal, Su Li, Lisa Turpin, Anthony Goldstein, Terry Boot, Megan Jones, Katie Bell, and Tracey Davis. All are staring at Hermione Granger who has just entered with Newt unknowingly hidden in her robes.
Hermione: "Umm, hello... everyone."
[pause]
"Am I late? Did we change the time?"
Susan Bones stands up from her chair.
Susan: "Hermione, we think it's time you talked to someone..."
Hermione: "Oh, we are not going over this again! I told you, Holly and I went too far in our potions experiments over the holidays, but I'm fine! I have no wish to continue justifying my relationship with Holly to you! I am not a les... I'm not... that way! As I have said. I apologise for misleading you in any way, even though I have never said anything inconsistent with what I am saying today! There's nothing wrong with women loving women, but I want to be loved by a man. No Terry, it isn't a request; now can we please talk about something, anything else? As a stretch, I suggest ARITHMANCY!"
Newt carefully drops off Hermione's sleeve to find a damp corner to occupy.
Padma: "It is this sort of short-tempered response that has us worried, Hermione. You look rather overworked."
Hermione: "I am taking... an unusually heavy course load. I have a special project with Holly and Professor McGonagall. I. Am. Busy."
Hannah: "I thought Holly was in detention- what's this special project?"
Hermione: "Holly is in detention. Our accident over the holiday has raised some concerns with Professor McGonagall, so Holly is spending the detention reading up on ethics and morals and proper societal behavior with me as a study partner."
Everyone else: "Ohhhhhhh!"
Hermione: "OH! I don't believe I just said that! Please swear to me none of you will breathe a word of this. Oh, Holly's going to kill me! Oh! Not literally! No, she just has the worst luck with her public image, and now I've added to it. Will you please say nothing? Please?"
[various muttered agreements]
Hermione's look changes from horror to skepticism.
Hermione: "You're not going to, are you? This will be common knowledge by morning, won't it?"
Katie: "I'd be surprised if the Prophet isn't already working up a special edition at this point."
Hermione: "I... have better places to be."
Hermione turns around and leaves.
Marietta: "She is in such denial."
Padma: "You hope. Why is it you do not approach Evans if you are so sexually frustrated?"
Marietta: "Are you mad? The girl's a menace! She'd have me walking around the school naked except for a collar and chain by the end of the week."
Katie: "You hope."
Anthony: "I hope."
Susan: "Just when you seem to have convinced us you're an enlightened man, you say that?"
Anthony: "What? A naked girl is a naked girl and Marietta is well-equipped, lesbian or not."
(much throwing around of pens, papers and inkwells ensues)
Newt leaves.
Transcription ends.
Thanks Newt. You did wonderfully. Unfortunately, this didn't tell me what I wanted to know.
Transcription: 10th January, 1994 starting 1:08 PM (first run, sleeping period)
Holly and Hermione are cuddled together in Hermione's bed in their underclothes, the curtains Silenced and covered with Notice-Me-Not. Holly has her arms loosely wrapped around Hermione's torso, both girls lying on their sides facing away from the window.
Holly: "Hermione, I have a confession. I sent Newt along with you for your Arithmancy group. They're quite the sewing circle, aren't they?"
Hermione: "You did? Oh, of all the times you could have decided to spy on me! Ugh!"
Holly: "I'm sorry, Hermione. You've just been so closed off, and I overheard Padma and Marietta planning their sit-you-down..."
Hermione: "I should be quite cross with you, but I appreciate that you wanted to protect me. They are quite an odd collection, and they have been a source of much of my confusion."
Holly: "How so?"
Hermione: "Well first they were upset because I declared myself to be straight, saying I was laying on oppressive labels where they weren't wanted. Then they were telling me they admired me for being 'subtly open' about our relationship, and that was before you were thrown off the Quidditch squad. I hadn't even kissed you yet! And THEN because of your date with Dean, they were accusing you of being a tourist by comparison to my forthright exclusively gay image, 'however modestly I was projecting it'. Every time they go off like this, I tell them once again that I am not gay, not that there's anything wrong with it and they nod pleasantly saying my secret is safe with them. They consider me a model of the strong, smart female of our generation. Frankly, I am flummoxed."
Holly: "I'm not sure I understand. What does this have to do with Arithmancy?"
Hermione: "That's what I said! Somehow the group had evolved into a multi-house pro-lesbian feminist cult."
Holly: "All that, just because they're jealous that I'm allowed into your knickers?"
Hermione: "Don't be crude. Only Marietta is jealous, and probably because she's still futilely stalking Cho Chang for her attentions. The rest of the group members aren't gay, they just seem obsessed with talking about sex amongst women. They consider lesbians to be paragons for women's rights in the magical world."
Holly: "Yeah, I still don't get it."
Hermione: "Well, to hear them tell it, being openly lesbian in British Magical society is somewhat like being a native Christian in mainland China. With the Ministry and Wizengamot commanded by the blood-obsessed Patriarchs, 'non-breeders' are tolerated as an inconsequential minority of nutcases so long as they stay quiet. If they stand out, they are persecuted harshly and unapologetically. The group is looking to me like a revolutionary leader, and all I've done is let you seduce me."
Holly: "Well, I don't think I've had to do any seducing since our first time. As I said, I will take as much or as little as you're willing to offer. You've just been so willing..."
Hermione: "They're honoring me for your identity- I am not gay!"
Holly: "Maybe they are all just beginning to see what I see- that you are a woman of greatness. You just haven't declared any other crusade for them to follow, so they're painting you with their cause of preference. Besides, what would you call yourself, should you be asked to adopt a label?"
Hermione: "I...I am...I am not homosexual."
[pause]
"I'm ...just ...Holly-sexual."
Both girls burst out laughing loudly.
Transcription ends.
Holly
*
18th January, 1994
Harry,
At some point, I'm thinking of solving this Sirius Black problem. First, we'll need to lure him into a trap, but one that will hold him away from the Dementors without anyone being the wiser. Then if I can arrange for some Veritaserum, we can see where things truly stand. I wouldn't necessarily want to delve into a madman's mind for my first Legilimens invasion. It also occurred to me that if we have him secured and sedated, like the way zookeepers can take down a tiger, we could use some sort of Paternity testing spell to figure out if he's really my Dad after all. Just so we can clear that up. Actually there's more to that than you might expect. Sirius Black is currently the last inheritor of the Ancient and Noble House of Black, aside from the Malfoys or his convicted Death-Eater cousin, Bellatrix Black LeStrange. (Wait. Chocolate LeStrange. Dark Insane-O Chocolate. Florean needs to be pranked.)
I found out most of this from the Gryffindor library because (and I can hardly believe it) Sirius was in Gryffindor, the first Black in twenty generations that wasn't a Slytherin or Ravenclaw, including a Slytherin Headmaster. The library keeps family line records for every Gryffindor, but only if the lineage is on record with the Ministry, which is why there's nothing about me under Potter or Black. So, assuming he wasn't disowned for Adrian's sense of humour, and assuming he's my father, and assuming he's still a criminal or at least insane, I stand to inherit a fortune. A fortune would enable my freedom from the Dursleys. I could pay you back for the loans. It's a weird thing to be hopeful about, but I'm kind of hoping my father is a mass-murderer. I just need to catch him first. All things in their proper order.
Hermione informed me that while she couldn't find the Paternity-testing spell, there is a reference to one in the Gryffindor library referring to a family Grimoire and we should ask Ginny for it- it's a Prewett spell, not Weasley, and the Prewett's track lineage through the women, which might be why they were never well-regarded in the Wizengamot. I have negotiated the loan of my Nimbus in exchange for the secret knowledge- Ginny is writing her mum for it. That leaves me broomless as the Firebolt is under inspection as part of the ethics detentions. Most of the involved parties are already attending and Minerva hadn't worked up anything more than a reading list when she came up with her plan to rehabilitate me. I don't mind. Each time we go to detention, McG or Flitwick gets Hermione's motor running hot playing with new magic while I read Aristotle, Voltaire or John Locke. My appreciation for learned scholars is increasing just by positive reinforcement, and Hermione loves it when I recite the different types of Platonic love into her nethers using Parseltongue. It doesn't hurt that I've been able to crack into Padma's books as well, since they are all about the connection between the body and personal energy. I've used some of the practical exercises from the third book to give Hermione erotic massages. During the day, she's quiet and focused. At night, she growls, purrs, screeches and roars.
I'm glad she's getting past our near-divine error. There's only one thing. She doesn't reach out to touch or kiss me anymore. Everything starts with her saying somehow that she's excited and I answer by caressing her; then we get touch-acceptable. Other than that, her mind is on something else.
Holly
*
24th January, 1994
Harry,
I think I may be losing Hermione. I have been monitoring her closely for the last three days, as she has stopped Turning me with her. I have tried to track her down several times, but she's learned some trick about the Map that masks our time-duplicates. Only the first version is shown, and that's when she's usually attending classes. It wasn't until two hours ago that I found where she's been spending her time.
In the DADA instructor's private study.
I saw Hermione's and Prof. Lupin's dots labeled there on the Map, nearly on top of each other. Occasionally they would move apart, and then come back together. Seeing this made me a bit insane. I was determined to go straight up there to confront them and see what sort of mischief they've been managing on their own. Unfortunately, I was sidetracked along the way by a blond crackpot with time issues of her own.
Newt, if you please.
Transcription: 24h January, 1994 starting 6:38 PM
Holly is walking quickly towards the faculty residence wing. As she turns a corner, she collides with Luna Lovegood, who was standing there as if anticipating Holly's arrival. Both girls stand up. Holly moves to walk around Luna down the narrow corridor but Luna steps in front of her. Holly steps to the other side and Luna counters perfectly.
Holly: "Luna, please stand aside, I need to go past you."
Luna: "I don't mind that our dance is over, because I wanted to introduce myself to you!"
Holly: "We've met."
Luna: "Oh pish tosh, a trading of names and threats."
Holly: "What did you have in mind?"
Luna: "Oh, however many exchanges of fluids you have time for. I know we'll have fun together eventually but I'm so frisky right now. Like a twitchy bunny wearing a robe. For the moment."
Luna starts wiggling her nose and holds her hands behind her head, moving them like slender bunny ears.
Holly: "I'm ...seeing someone."
Luna: "Yes, I'm right here!"
Holly: "No, I mean I'm dedicated to Hermione."
Luna: "That bitch?! Still? I would think now that she has betrayed and abandoned you..."
Holly pales, her eyes goggling.
Holly: "What are you on about?"
Luna: "Oh! Oh my! It's still January! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! You know...you know what makes seers like chess p-players? Haha, they...they sometimes are so busy seeing the whole board, they forget which move they're on! Hahahahaha (hiccup) hahahahahahahaha!"
Holly: "You're not right...in the head."
Luna's laughter stops suddenly as her expression changes to one of frustration.
Luna: "Ooooh! See, that's why I wanted to strip you naked! There's nothing quite so grounding as an orgasm or twelve. You'd see things much clearer..."
Luna's face begins to relax until her gaze starts to wander around, seeming to follow something flying around the ceiling.
Holly: "I ...uh....I get that you ...like me or something, but really, I have to find Hermione..."
Luna's gaze snaps back to drill into Holly's eyes. Her response is discordantly sing-song in its delivery.
Luna: "Like you? Oh, no! I hate you. I hate everything you represent. It's just that you're so seductively attractive...but where are your bouncing breasts? Oh, shittake mushrooms! I should have looked first, but they're going to be so hypnotic that I was trying to keep a clear mind! Forget this eeeeever happened...OBLIVi..."
Holly quick-draws her holdout wand before Luna's wand is pulled completely from behind her ear to target the Memory Charm.
Holly: "Stupefy. (sigh) Well, shite. I can't just leave her here."
Holly hoists Luna's slackened body over her shoulder and starts walking towards the hospital wing. After carting the unconscious Ravenclaw up two staircases, Holly stops and places the girl on the ground.
Holly: "Eventually it does occur to me that I'm a witch most days. Rigor Tergum. Mobilicorpus."
Holly continues her trek, dragging the floating girl behind her with her wand not unlike a piñata on a stick. As she enters the hospital wing, Holly moves the girl's floating body over a bed.
Holly: "Madame Pomfrey?"
Mme. Pomfrey: "Miss Evans? What trouble have you fallen into now?"
Holly: "Madame, you should know better. I almost never come in here for treatment while conscious. I'm dropping one off."
Mme. Pomfrey: "Miss Lovegood? What happened?"
Holly: "Liberacorpus. She... uhh... welllll..."
Mme. Pomfrey: "The more information you provide, the better the treatment she shall receive."
Holly: "Right. Luna here came onto me, suggested she hated me but that we would hook up sexually after I grew hypnotic breasts, and then she tried to Obliviate me. Whatever her current medication, I think the dosage is wrong or she ran out."
Mme. Pomfrey: "So Miss Evans, what's the matter with her?"
Holly: "Other than what I just said? I stunned her, petrified her and brought her here. I'd appreciate a head start before you..."
Mme. Pomfrey: "Finite. Ennervate."
Holly: "Awwwww!"
Holly gives Madame Pomfrey a withering look and then turns and starts sprinting from the hospital area. Luna quickly sits up on the bed but does not stand up to pursue, choosing instead to yell after Holly.
Luna: "That was very naughty! I'll have to spank you later for that! Ah, Madame Pomfrey, do you have any gumdrops?"
Transcription ends.
By the time I escaped the hospital wing, the only one in Prof. Lupin's rooms was Prof. Lupin. Hermione was settling in to her favorite table in the library, and I had to get to ethics detention. I am troubled. I can't just accuse them of meeting, when that's what people do, and Hermione has always contended that she wants to explore men as well, even if she'll only go so far. I refuse to accept Luna's 'prediction'. I hate that Hermione is keeping things from me, but if I can't trust her then trust is no longer part of my life. Hermione can't be doing what I think she's doing.
Tomorrow is Animagus Day. Hermione and I will have to stand naked in front of Prof. Lupin. Then I'll know. I'll watch them closely. Everything secret reveals itself in the body. The most scary thing for me is that I found myself planning to bring the blade of Gryffindor. Please, God. Let me be wrong.
Holly
*
25th January, 1994
Dear Harry,
I've had a small change of heart. I realise that Hermione may need some man-love, and I can't provide that. For all that I would keep her to myself, it just isn't fair to her. I will absolutely defend her from any bastard making unwanted advances, but I think Hermione wants this. I just need to accept it. Prof. Lupin is a decent man, even if he has serious issues with his illness. Maybe a little Hermione-love is exactly what he needs.
Screw noble, I hate this. I will see what is happening, and confront her on it afterwards. No need to embarrass anyone. Then I'll sort through what it means. It's like Divination. Why torture yourself with the possibilities, as long as you have an escape route?
I sound better than I feel. I guess what kills me the most about this is what Hermione said before. Is she Holly-sexual? Is she okay with it, or was it just a phase? Who are you, girl?
Holly
*
Transcription: 25th January, 1994, starting 10:30 AM GST.
DADA lab, space enlarged. Hedwig and Crookshanks in attendance (and Newt of course). The room contains several exercise mats, two changing screens, a large and wide mirror, a washtub, a desk with potions set aside and a binding circle drawn in the center of the floor. Prof. Lupin has scrolls available for note taking and a Wizarding camera. Holly and Hermione enter the room and head straight behind the changing screens. Both girls disrobe and put on a simple dressing gown while Prof. Lupin finishes casting some Warming Charms in the room. When Holly and Hermione emerge from behind the screen somewhat nervously, Prof. Lupin smiles at them reassuringly.
Prof. Lupin: "Okay, I'm glad you're here and all prepared. The potions are ready, I've cast some charms to keep things comfortable and the circle in the center will allow me to invoke a protection ward in case one of you transforms into something unusually ferocious. Before we begin, I'd like to go over some simple instructions based upon the experiences of my friends, the original Marauders.
Hermione: "We solemnly swear we are up to no good!"
Holly: "As opposed to most days, when it just happens naturally."
Prof. Lupin: "That's the spirit! Now, the mental state of the proto-Animagus is more instinctual and basic, so don't try to communicate at first. Just feel how it feels and more importantly pay attention to the feeling of the process of changing and changing back- it will help if you choose to master your form. Unlike traditional human to animal transfigurations, you will retain some sentient awareness. You'll just be...ahh..."
Holly: "Stupider?"
Prof. Lupin: "In a nutshell. We'll be giving the Animagus discovery potion to one of you at a time, allowing you to feel your new form, and then when you're done playing just stop moving around so we'll know you're ready for us to give you the Purging Draught, which will flush the first potion out of your system and return you to normal. Unfortunately as a side-effect of the Purging Draught, you will then empty your stomach contents quite forcefully. Please aim for the tub in the corner if you have the option, but don't be upset if things get messy. None of my friends were prepared for the consequences, and we had the poor judgment for all three to take the potion at the same time. You've never seen such filth nor heard so much whinging from otherwise courageous young men. I had them doing all sorts of favors for me all year."
Hermione: "Has anyone ever died doing this?"
Prof. Lupin: "I can't say, as it isn't usually done 'above board'. The one real risk is if you were to escape and run off. The potion will continue to work in your system until your body processes it, but the effect tends to become toxic after several hours depending on how carefully brewed it is. This is why we're testing you out in here and within the binding circle."
Holly: "Any other warnings?"
Prof. Lupin: "The first potion will give you feelings of euphoria and may lower some inhibitions, as this encourages you to seek your primal identity, your totemic self. Try to 'ride with it'.
Hermione: "Holly, I know you said you didn't like to be this exposed to men. If you don't want to..."
Holly: "Don't worry on it, Hermione. Professor Lupin is the picture of emotionless sex-less restraint. I don't feel at all threatened by his possible masculine urges. He's harmless."
Prof. Lupin: "I'm nearly offended for at least three reasons. So, who's first?"
Hermione looks hopefully at Holly.
Holly: "I think Hermione should go first."
Hermione: "What?"
Holly: "I've done my 'rush in headlong' duty several times over. You're up."
Hermione: "I...I'd really appreciate it if you went first."
Hermione casts a discrete glance at Prof. Lupin, but Holly catches it anyway.
Holly: "Look, Hermione. I'm not entirely certain what's going on between you two, but I know you've been spending time together. Just step up. There's no need to be embarrassed as I'm sure we've all seen a naked girl as beautiful as you before."
Hermione looks in shock at Holly, then shares a look with Prof. Lupin, nervous but not ashamed. Holly just barely smiles in relief.
Hermione: "Al-alright."
Hermione steps up to the desk with her head bowed, picking up a beaker of glowing blue fluid marked as 'Animagus'. Hermione then turns and steps into the center of the circle, kneeling down on the floor before turning her back to Prof. Lupin and removing her last piece of clothing. Drinking down the contents of the beaker, Hermione is immediately struck by a painful twist in her abdomen causing her to clutch her stomach and roll onto her side. Hermione tosses the beaker away and out of the circle just as her body begins to bubble and melt into a fleshy glob.
Holly: "Tell me this is normal!"
Prof. Lupin: "This is normal."
Hermione's blob continues to pulse for a minute until it starts to contract, finally forming into a small white creature curled up in the center of Hermione's dressing gown.
Prof. Lupin: "Is she a ...cat?"
Holly: "Ummm, not exactly."
Hermione the creature stumbles to standing, revealing her form to the other creatures in the room. Hermione has become a white cat, except she also has a large pair of white swan-like wings sprouting from behind her shoulders.
Hegwig: (Clack, clack, click, bark, snuffle!)
Prof. Lupin: "I'm sorry; do you know why your owl is upset?"
Holly: "She's not upset, she's impressed. Hedwig never thought Hermione would be avian, even partly."
Prof. Lupin: "Yes, well, this is not normal."
Hermione the swan-cat has been carefully walking around the floor, and now tentatively starts flapping her wings. Prof. Lupin takes some pictures while Hermione explores her form's unwieldy flying capabilities. With significant effort she starts to rise off the floor, giving up after lifting a foot from the ground for just a few seconds. Once on the ground, Hermione folds up her wings, curls her tail around her feet and sits, staring up at Holly and Lupin.
Prof. Lupin: "She barely tried anything."
Holly: "Believe me, she's satisfied. This may not constitute the worst possible form she could have, but I bet she'll beg off developing the talent. Hermione hates to fly."
Prof. Lupin grabs one of the beakers from the pair labeled 'Purge' and walks up to the swan-cat, who opens her mouth obediently the moment Lupin is close enough to pour in the draught.
Hermione's form once more dissolves into a bubbling mass before returning to her human guise. The naked girl at the center of the binding circle shivers uncontrollably for another minute before suddenly jumping up and rushing over to the washbin to begin an uncomfortable stomach-churning digestive emptying. Holly grabs her friend's dressing gown and brings it over to place over Hermione's shoulders, rubbing her back gently in reassurance while pulling Hermione's hair out of her face. Several minutes later, Hermione flips over and wraps herself in her gown.
Hermione: "That sucked. I can't believe I have wings."
Holly: "They were really beautiful, Hermione. You should look at the pictures later. You really are splendid."
Prof. Lupin: "I feel that I should interject here. There's no reason for you to have a mixed form normally. Do you have any history with uncontrolled or accidental transfigurations?"
Both girls: (sigh) "Yes."
Transcription ends.
It took another hour for Holly and Hermione to recount their troubles with Polyjuice and Holly's experiences with Quirrel-mort, the Basilisk, Fawkes and the eggs. You've read it before, so we'll pick things up where Holly enters the circle.
Transcription: 25th January, 1994, starting 11:51 AM GST.
By this point, Hermione is dressed once more in her school uniform, but is slumped in one of the chairs with a conjured icepack on her head. Holly takes off her glasses and places them on the desk, grabs the last tube labeled 'Animagus' and then walks to the center of the circle. She gives Hermione a smile and takes off her robe while standing with her feet shoulder width apart. Lupin looks up briefly and then double-takes, spending a long stare in Holly's direction.
Hermione: "Holly, I think you're actually provoking Professor Lupin."
Holly: "Well what sort of Marauder experiment would this be if no one was teased during the process?"
Holly stands still with her hands at her hips still holding the flask.
Prof. Lupin: "Holly, uh...when...whenever you're...ready."
Holly: "That'll work."
Holly smiles and drinks down the potion, dropping to sit on the floor as the potion begins to take hold. After several moments of disturbing blobness, Holly emerges as a black bird, smaller than a crow.
Hermione: "Was that what it was like for me?"
Prof. Lupin: "Yes, although Holly seems to be acclimating to the new form rather quickly."
Holly: (Kaah! Click-click hiss kaah!)
Hermione: "You know I'm not going to understand that!"
Holly: (Hiss hiss clack)
Holly hops around the room for several minutes, engaging Hedwig in a conversation briefly. After a little while, Holly takes flight, almost immediately slamming into the ceiling and falling to the floor.
Hermione: "Holly!"
Holly flips over and gives flight another try, struggling to carefully lift off without launching into anything.
Hermione: "She does this to drive me spare, you know!"
Prof. Lupin: "That I can believe. I'm glad her form is so ...mundane. I think it suits her."
Hermione: "It suited her more before the Basilisk changed her. I wonder if our potion will give her back her black hair."
Prof. Lupin: "Would you prefer that?"
Hermione: "I'll be happy so long as she doesn't become more bizarre. You wouldn't believe the lengths we've gone to in being together. I'm just not sure I could take another mutation."
As she circles the room, Holly suddenly drops to the ground. Prof. Lupin takes one last picture and grabs the last beaker from the desk. Before Prof. Lupin can move to administer the counter-potion to the squawking blackbird, it begins to bubble and froth once more, growing into a spindly human boy in his early teens with messy black hair and pale skin lying naked on the stone floor. Holly slowly blinks open 'his' eyes and looks upon the details of this new form, rising to sit up on the floor, holding both arms around 'his' torso to offset the chill.
Holly: "You didn't give me the counter-potion yet, right? So why am I ...does my voice seem weird to you? Hey look! I'm a MANimagus! I feel stupider already..."
Prof. Lupin: "Well I didn't see that coming."
Hermione: "But that's...but you...this is not happening!"
Holly starts inspecting her 'boy' body, looking at her hands, staring at her now male genitals. Moving to an upright kneel, Holly looks over 'his' shoulder at 'his' narrower hips and pale bum. Holly slumps back down to sit on 'his' heels.
Prof. Lupin: "Hermione, calm down. There may be another ...explanation. Uhh...hmm..."
Holly: "Hermione, what's wrong? This is just ...temporary...right?"
Prof. Lupin: "Huh. I'm not laying odds one way or the other."
Holly glances towards where Prof. Lupin should be, and then turns to look at Hermione when she begins speaking while hyperventilating.
Hermione: "I can't have...what about...? You didn't know, did you? Did you? If you knew, why...? I (sob) can't...! This is not happening! I can't (sob)... I can't be here!"
Hermione runs out of the room crying.
Holly: "Hermione? What's the matter? Why...?"
Holly catches the reflection of her transformed body in the mirror, bolts to the desk and grabs her glasses. Holly puts them on to get a better look and stares at the reflection in the mirror.
Holly: "F-f-fu-u-uck."
[pause]
"OH FOR ALL OF THE POSSIBLE STUPIDEST, MOST OBVIOUS AND RIDICULOUS BRAIN-FUCKS CONCEIVED IN THE HISTORY OF ALL MANKIND!"
[pause]
Holly slumps to the floor, covering 'his' head loosely with 'his' arms.
Holly: "I'm an idiot. I am Harry Potter. Newt, stop transcribing."
Transcription ends.
*
My Dear Professor Minerva McGonagall,
Using an elementary measure of logic, I have concluded that you see what is written herein, as you always have. I will meet you in your office at 2 PM accompanied by Professor Lupin. I have questions. You will answer them. If you do not, if you attempt to defer an answer for when I'm older, or say that some secrets must be kept...If there is anyone else there when we get there...
I will kill you all.
H.
*
Author's note: Even though I've written most of the next chapter, I'd like to know what you, the readers would want Holly/Harry to ask Prof McG. The obvious questions already covered include 'Who am I, really?', 'How did I get like this?', 'What happened the night of Halloween 1981 and after?', ' How can I trust you at this point?' and 'What do we do now?'. Please include your additional questions in a review or PM.
My apologies for taking three chapters to get here. I really have been trying to get to this point for a while but Holly insisted that I not steal her happiness so quickly, and she's scary when motivated. Would you believe this was chapter 12 in the original outline?
Holly Evans and the Spiral Path
Chapter 22: Who Are You
3rd January, 1994
Harry,
Weirdness is the best way to describe everyone's return to Dementorland.
Professor McGonagall had transported us back to Hogwarts by Apparation straight from the Atrium of the Ministry in London. While walking all the way back up to the castle, she was constantly mumbling about how she wasn't feeling in the least bit tired despite 'side-alonging' two criminals across the whole of Britain. Hermione reminded her that I was the criminal and she was the victim to which Prof McG very quickly turned to yell at us.
"If I discover either of you using handcuffs or...or chains in the next four years, I will reinstitute corporal punishments here at Hogwarts! Then you'll find out what punishment really is!"
"Um, Professor McGonagall? Not to distract from your fantasies but would you mind if we had a House-elf retrieve our trunks and pets from the Grangers, possibly leaving a note for Hermione's parents?"
"Oh, Holly you didn't just say that!"
We all stopped walking. Prof McG's shoulders just slumped.
"Yes, Miss Evans. That will be fine. Miss Granger, please write a note to inform your parents that you have been returned early to school to aid in a special project that was getting out of hand."
"But Professor, I can't lie to my parents."
"Not well, at any rate."
"Shush, Holly! Please!"
"You won't be lying. The special project is the re-education of one Holly Evans in the areas of morals, ethics and proper behavior! Miss Evans, you will be serving detention with me each weeknight starting at seven sharp for the next THREE MONTHS, wherein you will be schooled until ethics bleeds out your ears! I will consider Miss Granger's attendance to be optional, as she will be the teaching assistant."
"Professor, we've been involved with another special project..."
"Yes, Professor Lupin was quite enthusiastic (for him) when describing your Owl-shaped Patronus, Miss Evans. I don't believe you require any further instruction in the spell. I must say you both have impressed me with your drive to learn this very difficult magic. Should you maintain your skill in it until your OWL testing, I have no doubt the Patronus would garner an extra 10 points for the Defense practical exam. Should Miss Evans' instruction in other areas not take hold, I'm sure you'll be well-regarded in Azkaban for your O+."
"Cool. So. Detention?"
"An intervention! With reading! And testing!"
Everything else she said was mumbled, so I don't think she was talking to us. I can't say I'm surprised on the topic. In a way, I'm touched that Prof McG cares that much.
Before everyone else returned this afternoon on the Express, we had more weirdness. As Hermione and I were eating in the Great Hall, the Headmaster appeared behind me from nowhere.
"Miss Evans, you lied to me."
"Oi! Give a girl a warning, Professor!"
"I do not appreciate being lied to. I thought we agreed you would stay where it is safe."
"Well sir, safety is relative. My recent Divination work clearly indicated that I would be breaking the law this holiday, and I felt it was a better chance for it not to be for murder if I stayed away from the Dursleys. Besides, if you think about it, you weren't lied to."
"Oh? Perhaps you didn't lie, but you deceived me."
"Exactly. You were pranked!"
I smiled but that actually made him laugh. Freaky.
The last bit of weirdness isn't really odd but it is disturbing, I suppose. Everyone seemed to be in good spirits as they arrived for the Returning Feast, but slowly the mood seemed to be getting darker. Originally I thought it might be the Dementor influence, though they hadn't really moved in to re-siege the castle just yet, instead keeping a very wide orbit of the grounds while periodically dive-bombing the Forbidden Forest. Then I noticed a pattern to the change in mood. It started at the Hufflepuff table with a tight conversation surrounding Susan Bones, which then bounced over to the Gryffindors when Hannah sat with Neville for pudding. Soon after, the mood dropped amongst some Ravenclaws as Parvati caught up with her sister returning from the library. By the end of the feast some dozen or more students, mostly girls were giving me an evil eye. When I turned to look at Hermione, I recognised that she also had sensed the change, but her expression was more one of shame. Not embarrassment, like you've been caught in a human goof, but the shame of someone who was failing in the eyes of others. Before I could ask Hermione about it she had bolted from the table, saying she had to look up something in the library. I decided not to crowd her, given the looks I was receiving. Normally I could care less about others' opinions but Mrs. Granger's concerns came back to me, and I realised that just because I can ignore them doesn't mean it won't hurt Hermione.
After leaving the Great Hall I retrieved the Map from the Twins and checked up on Hermione remotely. She was in the library, occasionally moving to the stacks to acquire more books. I guess she really did have something on her mind.
Interestingly, I caught sight of another actor in our dramas whose movements drew my attention. The Marauders must have penetrated the Slytherin stronghold at some point, because I could see Pansy along with Bulstrode, Malfoy, Pucey, Bole and Flint all walking across the Slytherin common room but they disappeared into an unmarked space through a wall, indicating an unmapped room. After just a few minutes the others trailed out, but Pansy didn't. I've checked the Map several times this evening as I catch up on Arithmancy homework, and she hasn't emerged. Perhaps it's a safe room of some sort, as her entourage hadn't spent any time after depositing her within to attend to her.
Weird, wild stuff.
Holly
P.S.: Hagrid shared some disturbing news. Buckbeak's assault on Draco Malfoy is being handled by a hearing in April to determine if Bucky should be destroyed as an uncontrollable rogue monster. One would think if they thought Bucky was uncontrollable, they wouldn't wait four months with him out of control to determine that. Politically this is just stupid, but I'm not surprised Draco is taking out this vendetta to the fullest extent of his influence. He really has nothing else of his own experience to talk about. In the future, people will laugh at how vindictive he is getting about 'some animal scratching him'. I'm surprised Lucius is permitting this tantrum. I guess that counts as weird, too.
*
7th January, 1994
Harry,
I'm being left out of something on purpose. Hermione is on a mission, but she may also be getting hung up on her reputation.
When talking with her, she deflects any inquiry about her growing anxiety (or her quest) with other things of interest- Prof. Lupin has helped her find another Patronus form, an otter, but she's still having problems bringing it about; Hermione's been tired a lot lately, possibly owing to the near-death experience; she may have convinced Professors Flitwick and McGonagall to inspect my Firebolt for curses and the like during my ethics detentions, except she doesn't want them to do it in front of me while I read as it would be distracting from the purpose of the detention. Always she throws these other things out there to explain her discontent, but it's something else. Hermione is having nightmares, and my holding her only helps half of the time. She won't tell me what's wrong so I decided to get proactive.
Using my Turner time I spied in on some of the disgruntled who were giving me the evil eye during the Returning Feast. After a few missions, I was able to overhear this conversation:
Transcription: 6th January, 1994 starting 8:14 PM
Holly is Cloaked behind one of the stacks of books in the History section of the library. On the other side of the shelves, Draco Malfoy is hiding under a poorly-cast Disillusionment Charm, looking at a table where the Gryffindor Quidditch team including alternates is working on new plays. Ron Weasley is standing, gesturing with his hands to show some sort of tactical movement.
Draco: (whispering) "That's right, Weasley! Do everything you can. Your pathetic team won't have a chance against us next match. Use your hands, you simpleton. It's not like you can describe anything clearly with your mouth all stuffed with... food. Use your hands. Use them...use them..."
Transcription halted.
Newt! Not that one! After! The one after!
Sorry, Mum.
Transcription: 6th January, 1994 starting 8:33 PM
Holly is Cloaked behind one of the stacks of books in the Charms section of the library. On the other side of the shelves, Padma Patil is speaking quietly with Marietta Edgecombe. Both occasionally take a surreptitious look at Hermione, who is feverishly working on a scroll at a table, surrounded by 40 books.
Padma: "Just look at her. She is a fright. Whatever Evans did to her has played her nerves to her limit."
Marietta: "No, I don't think so. For all that you or I would be one step from a nervous breakdown if we looked like that; I think Granger is actually happy at the moment. She's on a mission of some sort. Just look at her eyes. Her hair may look like a used broom, but her eyes are lit up with something. Of course, if what they say happened really happened, I would be happily frazzled, too."
Padma: "Marietta, no one could give or receive that much pleasure, it is patently ridiculous. It is like I said; Evans tortured her somehow, but she is afraid to speak. I do not trust your opinion of her eyes, either. You have been obsessed with Cho since day one, convinced she is about to let you in to her underthings based upon 'that look in her eye'."
Marietta: (whinging a little) "She's close to breaking, I know it!"
Padma: "Marietta no, she is not. It's been four years. You are just a shield to keep away unwanted boys. Cho has no interest in pursuing your kind of relationship."
Marietta: "I found that same look in your eyes..."
Padma: "One time! And I keep telling you, it was just to keep you from slitting your wrists."
Marietta: "And the other time?"
Padma: "Curiosity. We barely had a chance to kiss each other the first time. I have a new experiment, now. Besides, the question of the moment is whether we need to save Hermione Granger from a domineering bisexual terror-monger or congratulate her for standing up for her beliefs as a lesbian. Either way, her life is at risk."
Marietta: "So, we confront her at the next study group?"
Padma: "Everyone who is concerned will be there; I think it is best that we act soon."
Transcription ends.
Arithmancy. I stopped going because they were talking above my skill level and I couldn't explain why I was studying it when I'm not in the class. Fourteen of them meet in a small classroom barely the size of our dorm. It's a tight space, making it hard to squeeze in, particularly under the Cloak. I'm not a ghost.
Newt? I have a mission for you.
Huzzah!
Holly
*
Transcription: 9th January, 1994 starting 4:01 PM
In the crowded mini-classroom for the Arithmancy study group, huddled around a long table are Padma Patil, Marietta Edgecombe, Susan Bones, Hannah Abbott, Morag MacDougal, Su Li, Lisa Turpin, Anthony Goldstein, Terry Boot, Megan Jones, Katie Bell, and Tracey Davis. All are staring at Hermione Granger who has just entered with Newt unknowingly hidden in her robes.
Hermione: "Umm, hello... everyone."
[pause]
"Am I late? Did we change the time?"
Susan Bones stands up from her chair.
Susan: "Hermione, we think it's time you talked to someone..."
Hermione: "Oh, we are not going over this again! I told you, Holly and I went too far in our potions experiments over the holidays, but I'm fine! I have no wish to continue justifying my relationship with Holly to you! I am not a les... I'm not... that way! As I have said. I apologise for misleading you in any way, even though I have never said anything inconsistent with what I am saying today! There's nothing wrong with women loving women, but I want to be loved by a man. No Terry, it isn't a request; now can we please talk about something, anything else? As a stretch, I suggest ARITHMANCY!"
Newt carefully drops off Hermione's sleeve to find a damp corner to occupy.
Padma: "It is this sort of short-tempered response that has us worried, Hermione. You look rather overworked."
Hermione: "I am taking... an unusually heavy course load. I have a special project with Holly and Professor McGonagall. I. Am. Busy."
Hannah: "I thought Holly was in detention- what's this special project?"
Hermione: "Holly is in detention. Our accident over the holiday has raised some concerns with Professor McGonagall, so Holly is spending the detention reading up on ethics and morals and proper societal behavior with me as a study partner."
Everyone else: "Ohhhhhhh!"
Hermione: "OH! I don't believe I just said that! Please swear to me none of you will breathe a word of this. Oh, Holly's going to kill me! Oh! Not literally! No, she just has the worst luck with her public image, and now I've added to it. Will you please say nothing? Please?"
[various muttered agreements]
Hermione's look changes from horror to skepticism.
Hermione: "You're not going to, are you? This will be common knowledge by morning, won't it?"
Katie: "I'd be surprised if the Prophet isn't already working up a special edition at this point."
Hermione: "I... have better places to be."
Hermione turns around and leaves.
Marietta: "She is in such denial."
Padma: "You hope. Why is it you do not approach Evans if you are so sexually frustrated?"
Marietta: "Are you mad? The girl's a menace! She'd have me walking around the school naked except for a collar and chain by the end of the week."
Katie: "You hope."
Anthony: "I hope."
Susan: "Just when you seem to have convinced us you're an enlightened man, you say that?"
Anthony: "What? A naked girl is a naked girl and Marietta is well-equipped, lesbian or not."
(much throwing around of pens, papers and inkwells ensues)
Newt leaves.
Transcription ends.
Thanks Newt. You did wonderfully. Unfortunately, this didn't tell me what I wanted to know.
Transcription: 10th January, 1994 starting 1:08 PM (first run, sleeping period)
Holly and Hermione are cuddled together in Hermione's bed in their underclothes, the curtains Silenced and covered with Notice-Me-Not. Holly has her arms loosely wrapped around Hermione's torso, both girls lying on their sides facing away from the window.
Holly: "Hermione, I have a confession. I sent Newt along with you for your Arithmancy group. They're quite the sewing circle, aren't they?"
Hermione: "You did? Oh, of all the times you could have decided to spy on me! Ugh!"
Holly: "I'm sorry, Hermione. You've just been so closed off, and I overheard Padma and Marietta planning their sit-you-down..."
Hermione: "I should be quite cross with you, but I appreciate that you wanted to protect me. They are quite an odd collection, and they have been a source of much of my confusion."
Holly: "How so?"
Hermione: "Well first they were upset because I declared myself to be straight, saying I was laying on oppressive labels where they weren't wanted. Then they were telling me they admired me for being 'subtly open' about our relationship, and that was before you were thrown off the Quidditch squad. I hadn't even kissed you yet! And THEN because of your date with Dean, they were accusing you of being a tourist by comparison to my forthright exclusively gay image, 'however modestly I was projecting it'. Every time they go off like this, I tell them once again that I am not gay, not that there's anything wrong with it and they nod pleasantly saying my secret is safe with them. They consider me a model of the strong, smart female of our generation. Frankly, I am flummoxed."
Holly: "I'm not sure I understand. What does this have to do with Arithmancy?"
Hermione: "That's what I said! Somehow the group had evolved into a multi-house pro-lesbian feminist cult."
Holly: "All that, just because they're jealous that I'm allowed into your knickers?"
Hermione: "Don't be crude. Only Marietta is jealous, and probably because she's still futilely stalking Cho Chang for her attentions. The rest of the group members aren't gay, they just seem obsessed with talking about sex amongst women. They consider lesbians to be paragons for women's rights in the magical world."
Holly: "Yeah, I still don't get it."
Hermione: "Well, to hear them tell it, being openly lesbian in British Magical society is somewhat like being a native Christian in mainland China. With the Ministry and Wizengamot commanded by the blood-obsessed Patriarchs, 'non-breeders' are tolerated as an inconsequential minority of nutcases so long as they stay quiet. If they stand out, they are persecuted harshly and unapologetically. The group is looking to me like a revolutionary leader, and all I've done is let you seduce me."
Holly: "Well, I don't think I've had to do any seducing since our first time. As I said, I will take as much or as little as you're willing to offer. You've just been so willing..."
Hermione: "They're honoring me for your identity- I am not gay!"
Holly: "Maybe they are all just beginning to see what I see- that you are a woman of greatness. You just haven't declared any other crusade for them to follow, so they're painting you with their cause of preference. Besides, what would you call yourself, should you be asked to adopt a label?"
Hermione: "I...I am...I am not homosexual."
[pause]
"I'm ...just ...Holly-sexual."
Both girls burst out laughing loudly.
Transcription ends.
Holly
*
18th January, 1994
Harry,
At some point, I'm thinking of solving this Sirius Black problem. First, we'll need to lure him into a trap, but one that will hold him away from the Dementors without anyone being the wiser. Then if I can arrange for some Veritaserum, we can see where things truly stand. I wouldn't necessarily want to delve into a madman's mind for my first Legilimens invasion. It also occurred to me that if we have him secured and sedated, like the way zookeepers can take down a tiger, we could use some sort of Paternity testing spell to figure out if he's really my Dad after all. Just so we can clear that up. Actually there's more to that than you might expect. Sirius Black is currently the last inheritor of the Ancient and Noble House of Black, aside from the Malfoys or his convicted Death-Eater cousin, Bellatrix Black LeStrange. (Wait. Chocolate LeStrange. Dark Insane-O Chocolate. Florean needs to be pranked.)
I found out most of this from the Gryffindor library because (and I can hardly believe it) Sirius was in Gryffindor, the first Black in twenty generations that wasn't a Slytherin or Ravenclaw, including a Slytherin Headmaster. The library keeps family line records for every Gryffindor, but only if the lineage is on record with the Ministry, which is why there's nothing about me under Potter or Black. So, assuming he wasn't disowned for Adrian's sense of humour, and assuming he's my father, and assuming he's still a criminal or at least insane, I stand to inherit a fortune. A fortune would enable my freedom from the Dursleys. I could pay you back for the loans. It's a weird thing to be hopeful about, but I'm kind of hoping my father is a mass-murderer. I just need to catch him first. All things in their proper order.
Hermione informed me that while she couldn't find the Paternity-testing spell, there is a reference to one in the Gryffindor library referring to a family Grimoire and we should ask Ginny for it- it's a Prewett spell, not Weasley, and the Prewett's track lineage through the women, which might be why they were never well-regarded in the Wizengamot. I have negotiated the loan of my Nimbus in exchange for the secret knowledge- Ginny is writing her mum for it. That leaves me broomless as the Firebolt is under inspection as part of the ethics detentions. Most of the involved parties are already attending and Minerva hadn't worked up anything more than a reading list when she came up with her plan to rehabilitate me. I don't mind. Each time we go to detention, McG or Flitwick gets Hermione's motor running hot playing with new magic while I read Aristotle, Voltaire or John Locke. My appreciation for learned scholars is increasing just by positive reinforcement, and Hermione loves it when I recite the different types of Platonic love into her nethers using Parseltongue. It doesn't hurt that I've been able to crack into Padma's books as well, since they are all about the connection between the body and personal energy. I've used some of the practical exercises from the third book to give Hermione erotic massages. During the day, she's quiet and focused. At night, she growls, purrs, screeches and roars.
I'm glad she's getting past our near-divine error. There's only one thing. She doesn't reach out to touch or kiss me anymore. Everything starts with her saying somehow that she's excited and I answer by caressing her; then we get touch-acceptable. Other than that, her mind is on something else.
Holly
*
24th January, 1994
Harry,
I think I may be losing Hermione. I have been monitoring her closely for the last three days, as she has stopped Turning me with her. I have tried to track her down several times, but she's learned some trick about the Map that masks our time-duplicates. Only the first version is shown, and that's when she's usually attending classes. It wasn't until two hours ago that I found where she's been spending her time.
In the DADA instructor's private study.
I saw Hermione's and Prof. Lupin's dots labeled there on the Map, nearly on top of each other. Occasionally they would move apart, and then come back together. Seeing this made me a bit insane. I was determined to go straight up there to confront them and see what sort of mischief they've been managing on their own. Unfortunately, I was sidetracked along the way by a blond crackpot with time issues of her own.
Newt, if you please.
Transcription: 24h January, 1994 starting 6:38 PM
Holly is walking quickly towards the faculty residence wing. As she turns a corner, she collides with Luna Lovegood, who was standing there as if anticipating Holly's arrival. Both girls stand up. Holly moves to walk around Luna down the narrow corridor but Luna steps in front of her. Holly steps to the other side and Luna counters perfectly.
Holly: "Luna, please stand aside, I need to go past you."
Luna: "I don't mind that our dance is over, because I wanted to introduce myself to you!"
Holly: "We've met."
Luna: "Oh pish tosh, a trading of names and threats."
Holly: "What did you have in mind?"
Luna: "Oh, however many exchanges of fluids you have time for. I know we'll have fun together eventually but I'm so frisky right now. Like a twitchy bunny wearing a robe. For the moment."
Luna starts wiggling her nose and holds her hands behind her head, moving them like slender bunny ears.
Holly: "I'm ...seeing someone."
Luna: "Yes, I'm right here!"
Holly: "No, I mean I'm dedicated to Hermione."
Luna: "That bitch?! Still? I would think now that she has betrayed and abandoned you..."
Holly pales, her eyes goggling.
Holly: "What are you on about?"
Luna: "Oh! Oh my! It's still January! Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha! You know...you know what makes seers like chess p-players? Haha, they...they sometimes are so busy seeing the whole board, they forget which move they're on! Hahahahaha (hiccup) hahahahahahahaha!"
Holly: "You're not right...in the head."
Luna's laughter stops suddenly as her expression changes to one of frustration.
Luna: "Ooooh! See, that's why I wanted to strip you naked! There's nothing quite so grounding as an orgasm or twelve. You'd see things much clearer..."
Luna's face begins to relax until her gaze starts to wander around, seeming to follow something flying around the ceiling.
Holly: "I ...uh....I get that you ...like me or something, but really, I have to find Hermione..."
Luna's gaze snaps back to drill into Holly's eyes. Her response is discordantly sing-song in its delivery.
Luna: "Like you? Oh, no! I hate you. I hate everything you represent. It's just that you're so seductively attractive...but where are your bouncing breasts? Oh, shittake mushrooms! I should have looked first, but they're going to be so hypnotic that I was trying to keep a clear mind! Forget this eeeeever happened...OBLIVi..."
Holly quick-draws her holdout wand before Luna's wand is pulled completely from behind her ear to target the Memory Charm.
Holly: "Stupefy. (sigh) Well, shite. I can't just leave her here."
Holly hoists Luna's slackened body over her shoulder and starts walking towards the hospital wing. After carting the unconscious Ravenclaw up two staircases, Holly stops and places the girl on the ground.
Holly: "Eventually it does occur to me that I'm a witch most days. Rigor Tergum. Mobilicorpus."
Holly continues her trek, dragging the floating girl behind her with her wand not unlike a piñata on a stick. As she enters the hospital wing, Holly moves the girl's floating body over a bed.
Holly: "Madame Pomfrey?"
Mme. Pomfrey: "Miss Evans? What trouble have you fallen into now?"
Holly: "Madame, you should know better. I almost never come in here for treatment while conscious. I'm dropping one off."
Mme. Pomfrey: "Miss Lovegood? What happened?"
Holly: "Liberacorpus. She... uhh... welllll..."
Mme. Pomfrey: "The more information you provide, the better the treatment she shall receive."
Holly: "Right. Luna here came onto me, suggested she hated me but that we would hook up sexually after I grew hypnotic breasts, and then she tried to Obliviate me. Whatever her current medication, I think the dosage is wrong or she ran out."
Mme. Pomfrey: "So Miss Evans, what's the matter with her?"
Holly: "Other than what I just said? I stunned her, petrified her and brought her here. I'd appreciate a head start before you..."
Mme. Pomfrey: "Finite. Ennervate."
Holly: "Awwwww!"
Holly gives Madame Pomfrey a withering look and then turns and starts sprinting from the hospital area. Luna quickly sits up on the bed but does not stand up to pursue, choosing instead to yell after Holly.
Luna: "That was very naughty! I'll have to spank you later for that! Ah, Madame Pomfrey, do you have any gumdrops?"
Transcription ends.
By the time I escaped the hospital wing, the only one in Prof. Lupin's rooms was Prof. Lupin. Hermione was settling in to her favorite table in the library, and I had to get to ethics detention. I am troubled. I can't just accuse them of meeting, when that's what people do, and Hermione has always contended that she wants to explore men as well, even if she'll only go so far. I refuse to accept Luna's 'prediction'. I hate that Hermione is keeping things from me, but if I can't trust her then trust is no longer part of my life. Hermione can't be doing what I think she's doing.
Tomorrow is Animagus Day. Hermione and I will have to stand naked in front of Prof. Lupin. Then I'll know. I'll watch them closely. Everything secret reveals itself in the body. The most scary thing for me is that I found myself planning to bring the blade of Gryffindor. Please, God. Let me be wrong.
Holly
*
25th January, 1994
Dear Harry,
I've had a small change of heart. I realise that Hermione may need some man-love, and I can't provide that. For all that I would keep her to myself, it just isn't fair to her. I will absolutely defend her from any bastard making unwanted advances, but I think Hermione wants this. I just need to accept it. Prof. Lupin is a decent man, even if he has serious issues with his illness. Maybe a little Hermione-love is exactly what he needs.
Screw noble, I hate this. I will see what is happening, and confront her on it afterwards. No need to embarrass anyone. Then I'll sort through what it means. It's like Divination. Why torture yourself with the possibilities, as long as you have an escape route?
I sound better than I feel. I guess what kills me the most about this is what Hermione said before. Is she Holly-sexual? Is she okay with it, or was it just a phase? Who are you, girl?
Holly
*
Transcription: 25th January, 1994, starting 10:30 AM GST.
DADA lab, space enlarged. Hedwig and Crookshanks in attendance (and Newt of course). The room contains several exercise mats, two changing screens, a large and wide mirror, a washtub, a desk with potions set aside and a binding circle drawn in the center of the floor. Prof. Lupin has scrolls available for note taking and a Wizarding camera. Holly and Hermione enter the room and head straight behind the changing screens. Both girls disrobe and put on a simple dressing gown while Prof. Lupin finishes casting some Warming Charms in the room. When Holly and Hermione emerge from behind the screen somewhat nervously, Prof. Lupin smiles at them reassuringly.
Prof. Lupin: "Okay, I'm glad you're here and all prepared. The potions are ready, I've cast some charms to keep things comfortable and the circle in the center will allow me to invoke a protection ward in case one of you transforms into something unusually ferocious. Before we begin, I'd like to go over some simple instructions based upon the experiences of my friends, the original Marauders.
Hermione: "We solemnly swear we are up to no good!"
Holly: "As opposed to most days, when it just happens naturally."
Prof. Lupin: "That's the spirit! Now, the mental state of the proto-Animagus is more instinctual and basic, so don't try to communicate at first. Just feel how it feels and more importantly pay attention to the feeling of the process of changing and changing back- it will help if you choose to master your form. Unlike traditional human to animal transfigurations, you will retain some sentient awareness. You'll just be...ahh..."
Holly: "Stupider?"
Prof. Lupin: "In a nutshell. We'll be giving the Animagus discovery potion to one of you at a time, allowing you to feel your new form, and then when you're done playing just stop moving around so we'll know you're ready for us to give you the Purging Draught, which will flush the first potion out of your system and return you to normal. Unfortunately as a side-effect of the Purging Draught, you will then empty your stomach contents quite forcefully. Please aim for the tub in the corner if you have the option, but don't be upset if things get messy. None of my friends were prepared for the consequences, and we had the poor judgment for all three to take the potion at the same time. You've never seen such filth nor heard so much whinging from otherwise courageous young men. I had them doing all sorts of favors for me all year."
Hermione: "Has anyone ever died doing this?"
Prof. Lupin: "I can't say, as it isn't usually done 'above board'. The one real risk is if you were to escape and run off. The potion will continue to work in your system until your body processes it, but the effect tends to become toxic after several hours depending on how carefully brewed it is. This is why we're testing you out in here and within the binding circle."
Holly: "Any other warnings?"
Prof. Lupin: "The first potion will give you feelings of euphoria and may lower some inhibitions, as this encourages you to seek your primal identity, your totemic self. Try to 'ride with it'.
Hermione: "Holly, I know you said you didn't like to be this exposed to men. If you don't want to..."
Holly: "Don't worry on it, Hermione. Professor Lupin is the picture of emotionless sex-less restraint. I don't feel at all threatened by his possible masculine urges. He's harmless."
Prof. Lupin: "I'm nearly offended for at least three reasons. So, who's first?"
Hermione looks hopefully at Holly.
Holly: "I think Hermione should go first."
Hermione: "What?"
Holly: "I've done my 'rush in headlong' duty several times over. You're up."
Hermione: "I...I'd really appreciate it if you went first."
Hermione casts a discrete glance at Prof. Lupin, but Holly catches it anyway.
Holly: "Look, Hermione. I'm not entirely certain what's going on between you two, but I know you've been spending time together. Just step up. There's no need to be embarrassed as I'm sure we've all seen a naked girl as beautiful as you before."
Hermione looks in shock at Holly, then shares a look with Prof. Lupin, nervous but not ashamed. Holly just barely smiles in relief.
Hermione: "Al-alright."
Hermione steps up to the desk with her head bowed, picking up a beaker of glowing blue fluid marked as 'Animagus'. Hermione then turns and steps into the center of the circle, kneeling down on the floor before turning her back to Prof. Lupin and removing her last piece of clothing. Drinking down the contents of the beaker, Hermione is immediately struck by a painful twist in her abdomen causing her to clutch her stomach and roll onto her side. Hermione tosses the beaker away and out of the circle just as her body begins to bubble and melt into a fleshy glob.
Holly: "Tell me this is normal!"
Prof. Lupin: "This is normal."
Hermione's blob continues to pulse for a minute until it starts to contract, finally forming into a small white creature curled up in the center of Hermione's dressing gown.
Prof. Lupin: "Is she a ...cat?"
Holly: "Ummm, not exactly."
Hermione the creature stumbles to standing, revealing her form to the other creatures in the room. Hermione has become a white cat, except she also has a large pair of white swan-like wings sprouting from behind her shoulders.
Hegwig: (Clack, clack, click, bark, snuffle!)
Prof. Lupin: "I'm sorry; do you know why your owl is upset?"
Holly: "She's not upset, she's impressed. Hedwig never thought Hermione would be avian, even partly."
Prof. Lupin: "Yes, well, this is not normal."
Hermione the swan-cat has been carefully walking around the floor, and now tentatively starts flapping her wings. Prof. Lupin takes some pictures while Hermione explores her form's unwieldy flying capabilities. With significant effort she starts to rise off the floor, giving up after lifting a foot from the ground for just a few seconds. Once on the ground, Hermione folds up her wings, curls her tail around her feet and sits, staring up at Holly and Lupin.
Prof. Lupin: "She barely tried anything."
Holly: "Believe me, she's satisfied. This may not constitute the worst possible form she could have, but I bet she'll beg off developing the talent. Hermione hates to fly."
Prof. Lupin grabs one of the beakers from the pair labeled 'Purge' and walks up to the swan-cat, who opens her mouth obediently the moment Lupin is close enough to pour in the draught.
Hermione's form once more dissolves into a bubbling mass before returning to her human guise. The naked girl at the center of the binding circle shivers uncontrollably for another minute before suddenly jumping up and rushing over to the washbin to begin an uncomfortable stomach-churning digestive emptying. Holly grabs her friend's dressing gown and brings it over to place over Hermione's shoulders, rubbing her back gently in reassurance while pulling Hermione's hair out of her face. Several minutes later, Hermione flips over and wraps herself in her gown.
Hermione: "That sucked. I can't believe I have wings."
Holly: "They were really beautiful, Hermione. You should look at the pictures later. You really are splendid."
Prof. Lupin: "I feel that I should interject here. There's no reason for you to have a mixed form normally. Do you have any history with uncontrolled or accidental transfigurations?"
Both girls: (sigh) "Yes."
Transcription ends.
It took another hour for Holly and Hermione to recount their troubles with Polyjuice and Holly's experiences with Quirrel-mort, the Basilisk, Fawkes and the eggs. You've read it before, so we'll pick things up where Holly enters the circle.
Transcription: 25th January, 1994, starting 11:51 AM GST.
By this point, Hermione is dressed once more in her school uniform, but is slumped in one of the chairs with a conjured icepack on her head. Holly takes off her glasses and places them on the desk, grabs the last tube labeled 'Animagus' and then walks to the center of the circle. She gives Hermione a smile and takes off her robe while standing with her feet shoulder width apart. Lupin looks up briefly and then double-takes, spending a long stare in Holly's direction.
Hermione: "Holly, I think you're actually provoking Professor Lupin."
Holly: "Well what sort of Marauder experiment would this be if no one was teased during the process?"
Holly stands still with her hands at her hips still holding the flask.
Prof. Lupin: "Holly, uh...when...whenever you're...ready."
Holly: "That'll work."
Holly smiles and drinks down the potion, dropping to sit on the floor as the potion begins to take hold. After several moments of disturbing blobness, Holly emerges as a black bird, smaller than a crow.
Hermione: "Was that what it was like for me?"
Prof. Lupin: "Yes, although Holly seems to be acclimating to the new form rather quickly."
Holly: (Kaah! Click-click hiss kaah!)
Hermione: "You know I'm not going to understand that!"
Holly: (Hiss hiss clack)
Holly hops around the room for several minutes, engaging Hedwig in a conversation briefly. After a little while, Holly takes flight, almost immediately slamming into the ceiling and falling to the floor.
Hermione: "Holly!"
Holly flips over and gives flight another try, struggling to carefully lift off without launching into anything.
Hermione: "She does this to drive me spare, you know!"
Prof. Lupin: "That I can believe. I'm glad her form is so ...mundane. I think it suits her."
Hermione: "It suited her more before the Basilisk changed her. I wonder if our potion will give her back her black hair."
Prof. Lupin: "Would you prefer that?"
Hermione: "I'll be happy so long as she doesn't become more bizarre. You wouldn't believe the lengths we've gone to in being together. I'm just not sure I could take another mutation."
As she circles the room, Holly suddenly drops to the ground. Prof. Lupin takes one last picture and grabs the last beaker from the desk. Before Prof. Lupin can move to administer the counter-potion to the squawking blackbird, it begins to bubble and froth once more, growing into a spindly human boy in his early teens with messy black hair and pale skin lying naked on the stone floor. Holly slowly blinks open 'his' eyes and looks upon the details of this new form, rising to sit up on the floor, holding both arms around 'his' torso to offset the chill.
Holly: "You didn't give me the counter-potion yet, right? So why am I ...does my voice seem weird to you? Hey look! I'm a MANimagus! I feel stupider already..."
Prof. Lupin: "Well I didn't see that coming."
Hermione: "But that's...but you...this is not happening!"
Holly starts inspecting her 'boy' body, looking at her hands, staring at her now male genitals. Moving to an upright kneel, Holly looks over 'his' shoulder at 'his' narrower hips and pale bum. Holly slumps back down to sit on 'his' heels.
Prof. Lupin: "Hermione, calm down. There may be another ...explanation. Uhh...hmm..."
Holly: "Hermione, what's wrong? This is just ...temporary...right?"
Prof. Lupin: "Huh. I'm not laying odds one way or the other."
Holly glances towards where Prof. Lupin should be, and then turns to look at Hermione when she begins speaking while hyperventilating.
Hermione: "I can't have...what about...? You didn't know, did you? Did you? If you knew, why...? I (sob) can't...! This is not happening! I can't (sob)... I can't be here!"
Hermione runs out of the room crying.
Holly: "Hermione? What's the matter? Why...?"
Holly catches the reflection of her transformed body in the mirror, bolts to the desk and grabs her glasses. Holly puts them on to get a better look and stares at the reflection in the mirror.
Holly: "F-f-fu-u-uck."
[pause]
"OH FOR ALL OF THE POSSIBLE STUPIDEST, MOST OBVIOUS AND RIDICULOUS BRAIN-FUCKS CONCEIVED IN THE HISTORY OF ALL MANKIND!"
[pause]
Holly slumps to the floor, covering 'his' head loosely with 'his' arms.
Holly: "I'm an idiot. I am Harry Potter. Newt, stop transcribing."
Transcription ends.
*
My Dear Professor Minerva McGonagall,
Using an elementary measure of logic, I have concluded that you see what is written herein, as you always have. I will meet you in your office at 2 PM accompanied by Professor Lupin. I have questions. You will answer them. If you do not, if you attempt to defer an answer for when I'm older, or say that some secrets must be kept...If there is anyone else there when we get there...
I will kill you all.
H.
*
Author's note: Even though I've written most of the next chapter, I'd like to know what you, the readers would want Holly/Harry to ask Prof McG. The obvious questions already covered include 'Who am I, really?', 'How did I get like this?', 'What happened the night of Halloween 1981 and after?', ' How can I trust you at this point?' and 'What do we do now?'. Please include your additional questions in a review or PM.
My apologies for taking three chapters to get here. I really have been trying to get to this point for a while but Holly insisted that I not steal her happiness so quickly, and she's scary when motivated. Would you believe this was chapter 12 in the original outline?
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