FicWad

Anywhere but here

After school I looked everywhere for Colin. I couldn't find him. I tried Kara but she was also mysteriously absent. I mean I know they couldn't have forgotten that I needed a ride a home. In mild frustration I sat myself down on the front steps of the school to wait. The way I figured, they have to pass here to get out and I would be waiting. While I was sitting there brooding, and it was brooding not pouting, a dark shadow passed over head. I knew before I even glanced up who it was.

"Hey Christian." The cologne gave him away.

"Hey. Whatcha doin?" He sat down next to be barely touching. I didn't look at him I kept looking down. I wasn't too sure how to answer that question. If I say I am waiting for Colin more questions would come up. If I lied and said I was just sitting there, he might want to do something and then I would miss Colin.

"Ward, it isn't a deep question you know?"He said softly looking around but at nothing in particular. There were a few kids hanging about and some stragglers still emerging from the building. I glanced sharply at him. It wasn't like him to be so gentle and concerned. His attitude made the fine hairs on the back of my neck stand up. His next words positively have them doing the tango. "Maybe we can go catch a movie tonight and just hang out, ya know?" At this point he was practically mumbling.

"Uhmm, I think I need to hang out with my friends tonight. Could I get a rain check on that?" I tried to be gentle but I really needed to talk to Colin quickly. To soften the blow since it looked like he was making a sincere effort to be considerate, I glanced around quickly to make sure no one was paying attention and leaned in and quickly pecked his cheek. Now that got his focus. I think he was a little shocked because it was the first time that I had initiated contact.

His eyes widened darkening to an almost black as and his lips parted as he unconsciously rubbed against the spot. I smiled at his bafflement it was just too cute.

"I have to go see you later." I said standing up and dusting off my bottom. I grabbed my bag and made to leave. As I stepped down I turned to glance over my shoulder,"Oh by the way, have you seen Colin around?" He hesitated then shrugged shaking his head in the negative. Oh well I guess I will just have to stop by his place myself. I sincerely hate the bus all those screaming and posing kids get on my last nerve. As I stood there rolling my eyes at the antics of a ninth grade girl trying to play coy with me a black spyder drew up to the stop. Hallelujah there is a God and his name is Rayne.

"Hey, Ward. Need a ride?" with him leaning over like that flashing those pearly whites how can I say no? Oh yeah, Christian. I scanned the area for my slightly possessive boyfriend, not seeing him I turned and smiled real big at Rayne. You know what they say, while cats away ...

"Sure. I was just on my way to Colin's if you don't mind." I said getting in and buckling up.

Rayne smiled a real sweetly and tilted his head slightly, "Anything for you doll face."

I swear he says the sweetest things. I ducked my head shyly, I will not blush! "How about some music?" I reached over to flip through the radio to my favorite station, The Buzz. I ended up staring in rapt attention at the gently flexing muscles encased in the luckiest pair of stone washed jeans ever. Crap I've started the drool thing again. Where is Colin when you need him?

"You finding that station alright, Ward?" He patted my thigh without looking over. It was more of a slow rub that went straight to the heart of the matter. I couldn't tell if he was flirting with me or if he was just having a laugh. My little man wasn't laughing more like singing the national anthem at a attention. I started to squirm in my seat trying to get comfortable. I covered my lap with my hands. I would have explained to little Ward why this wasn't a good time to sing no matter what the provocation but that would be too weird with Rayne right there, even for me.

"Are you going to tell me where I'm going or am I going to find out through osmosis?" Rayne drawled pulling my mind off little Ward.

"Uhmm yeah. Uh take a...right after the light. It's the third building down." I stammered trying to get my breathing under control.

"Alright then. Um Ward I wanted to talk to you about Christian. How are you guys doing?" I sensed he wasn't so sure about where he was going with this. I raised one slender blond brow.

"Uh we're fine. Why'd you ask? He say something?"

"No. It's just he's my friend and I know he comes off strong sometimes but he only gets that way when it really matters to him." I just gaped at him wordlessly. " Just be nice to him, okay?" A faint tell-tale blush dusted his cheeks as he brought the car to a stop. Oh gosh, Rayne was so impossibly cute and sensitive and caring and...'get a hold of yourself man!' I yelled at myself. I leaned in close and dared to cover his hand with my hand on the gear.

"I'll do my best." I whispered with a light squeeze to his hand before I got out. I had barely reached the steps of Colin's building before he pealed out of there.

"Colin! Colin! You'll never believe what happened!" I hollered as I came barrrelling up the stairs to the loft. Colin lived there with his older brother and his girlfriend.

I banged on the door and waited impatiently, hopping from one foot to another, for my best friend to answer. The response was slower than normal and less welcoming. The sliding of the large metal door sounded more than ever like the lowering of a drawbridge and Colin's face was etched with supressed anger.

My smile dropped and I went absolutely still as a dark cloud of foreboding pervaded my world.

"What's wrong?" I whispered even as I dreaded the answer. "Tell me, Colin." Colin turned sharply and stalked back into the loft leaving me forlorn and bewildered in his wake.

"What do you want Ward?" Colin sneered from the kitchen as he rumaged around for a drink. " Get the hell out of here before your psycho fucking boyfriend shows up and finishes the job he started on my back."

" What?! Did Christian touch you? Why?" I stumbled blindly into the room loathe to take this conversation to its inevitable conclusion.

"Yeah, he touched me. And it wasn't an orgasmic experience." Colin gritted between tightly clenched teeth. " It would seem that your...boyfriend..for lack of a better word, took exception to something I did to you and thought the locker room was an appropriate place air his grievances. He tried to stuff me into a locker convienently located near by. So now I will not be wearing my most fabulous muscle shirt tonight at The Station." With a chilling smile, he sauntered into the living to fling himself down in one of their designer chairs. It was so not like Colin to be so sarcastic and flippant.

"OH Colin! I'm so sorry. I know he didn't mean to it was an accident. Why did you have to go and say anything to him about it anyway. I said I would talk to you later. It was none of your business." I found myself ranting at Colin for lack of a better object. The one I really wanted to berate and yell at was not here. I also found myself blaming myself for Colin's pain after all it was my deranged lover that had slipped over the edge. As I looked back at my friend just laying there not really looking at anything in particular, the guilt and inadequency to control my universe began to build inside.

"Go home, Ward. Just go home" Colin whispered tiredly as he gently closed his eyes. His face was lined with world weariness and his body gave the ipression of bonelessness.

"No Colin. We have to talk about this." I insisted coming to kneel by his feet. Little slits of blue peered down at me for my reward.

"What now?" He said his lips barely moving.

"I want ... I want Christian and you to get along. I don't like to see you guys always at one another's throat. You can't protect me from everything. And I don't want you to protect me from Christian. It's like you always use to say, 'when it's right, it's just right.'" I intoned my lips pursed in an adorable pout of which he knew nothing.

"IF you are going to quote me you might at least get it right. I said to stop acting like a pathetic little house wife and stop nagging me." Brian said an infinitismo smile appearing only to be wiped clean with a twitch of his lips. "I won't let anyone hurt you even the man you say you like, even Christian. You know that right? You have to stand up to him and tell him what you want. I know you can because you are strong enough for both of us and you never let me get away with shit."

I ducked my head self consciously completely taken aback by Colin's declaration. I searched fruitlessly for a way to change the topic and return to safer more familiar ground with Colin. Once again, Colin knew what I needed even before I knew and gave it to me without being asked.

Slipping his index finger under my chin, Colin lifted my head up until we were gazing into each other's eyes then he said," Hey, don't hide away from me. I've told you once before and I'll tell you again. You are strong! Talk to Christian, you can handle him. Don't let Christian or anyone else ever make you doubt yourself. If Christian doesn't want you I'll always want you. After all how can I resist those adorable green puppy dog eyes and cute turned up button nose." Colin gently elaborated. Then he touched his forehead to mine tenderly rubbing to seal the moment.

And at that moment in time, my world stopped spinning. My heart stopped racing. My mind went blank. I was calm. My universe was right again, I was home. I belonged.

"I think you have to go now." Colin's whisper slowly dissolved the moment like a furl of smoke leaving as quietly and unobtrusively as it had been emitted. I didn't want to go just yet but I knew that it was time. Colin needed his space. As I got up to go out the door, the intercom went off with a crackle of static.

"Hey Colin, I'm downstairs. Can I come up?" came the strange metallic voice.

I glanced at Colin in question. He just shrugged, "Karen texted me earlier and I told her to come on over." He buzzed her up. I don't know what I was thinking or feeling exactly at that time but I knew that Colin wasn't the only one who needed some alone time. I just turned and left. I passed Karen on the stairs in one of those popular school girl mini skirts and a gauzy yellow top. She smiled at me in passing quickly touching up her lip gloss. I don't know when Colin got back with her and I don't even care. My stomach feels queasy. I think I'm going to be sick.