Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Blinded in chains
A/N: Just a short chapter, but I didn’t really have time to write any more and I wanted to add to it straight away =/ But anyways, I just wanna say thank you times a million for your amazing rates and reviews, and I hope you like this next little offering :] The last chapter is on the horizon folks, but I'm not sure how close exactly.
Thanks again.
Rayray xox
"Uhm...Frankie..." I shifted a little and moved my arm out to hug Frank close to me... but there was no Frank to hold. I frowned and smoothed my hand across the mattress looking for him... wait...
Mattress?
My eyelids fluttered open and I blinked roughly, rubbing my eyes with one fist as I propped myself up on my elbow, looking around me as my head swam a little from sleep. I was in my bed, and I was alone. I was certain I had been on the sofa when I fell asleep and I had been with Frank... surely he wouldn’t have been able to move me into my bed. Not on his own anyway. I sat up and felt my heart rate increase even as I tried to convince myself not to worry. But waking up in the wrong place and without my boyfriend was playing on my nerves which were already on edge, raw from the past couple of days.
"F - Frankie?" I croaked, my voice was hoarse and my throat burned from all the crying and shouting that had happened the previous day. I cleared my throat and tried again.
"Frankie!?" My voice was a little louder this time, but no stronger and I began to panic more. If I was feeling so shit then how was Frank? He had been just as upset, if not more upset than I had been. Where was he? What had happened while I had been asleep? Was it the police? Had Lyn been angry that we didn’t accept her apology and gone to the police after all? The thought made my stomach churn sickeningly and I groaned to myself, I couldn’t take this much more. I was on the brink of a meltdown, and beginning to welcome it with open arms.
"Hey bro', I was starting to wonder when you'd wake up." I blinked in surprise at Mikey who appeared in my doorway; he was holding to cups of coffee and had black rings under his eyes, though he didn’t look tired. He walked softly into the room and put the cups down onto the bedside table before dropping gently onto the edge of the bed beside me.
"Mikey?" I stared at him confusion. What was he doing here?
"Hey." He gave a soft smile and the way he was speaking did nothing to calm my nerves. He sounded as if someone had just died. As if he had to be the one to break the news to me. Panic flooded my chest and the tears rose in my eyes before I could stop them.
"Oh God... Frankie - where’s Frankie!?" I cried, going to dive out of the bed but Mikey pressed a hand to my chest and pushed me back down, hushing me.
"Its okay Gee, its okay - he's okay. He's asleep right now, he's fine -" Mikey kept a hand on my chest and I knew he could feel the rapid thumping of my heart beneath his palm.
"He's fine." He repeated his voice gentle but firm and I forced myself to take a deep breath, tipping my head back and breathing out after a small pause, some of the panic fading.
"Good...Good..." I swallowed deeply, my throat aching and I opened my eyes to see Mikey looking at me with concern. "What are you doing here?" I asked, there was something wrong... I knew there was. I could see it in his face, read it in his body language as he handed me one of the coffees and I gulped the hot liquid down gratefully, soothing my raw throat.
"I got a call from a girl yesterday..." He said quietly and I frowned, not understanding. "Her name was Lindsey." Mikey added and my lips parted in surprise, realization dawning on me.
"She told me that she had been to see you and was worried about you." He continued and I clamped my mouth shut. I didn’t know what to say, so I just let Mikey continue.
"She said that she had come to apologize to you for over reacting about your relationship. And that when she left you had been really angry, and that Frank was distraught." Mikey frowned a little. "She said she thought you were going to hurt yourselves, and that I needed to get over here quickly before you did something stupid." I blinked in surprise and I could see the accusing look in Mikeys eyes.
"W - What? What stupid things?" I whispered and Mikey tutted, rolling his eyes.
"Use your imagination Gee. She made it out like you two were gonna kill yourselves. You have no idea how scared I was - I nearly ran over an old woman I drove over here so fast!" Even in the current situation I couldn’t help but snort with laughter and Mikey scowled, but his eyes softened a little with relief. Clearly he really had believed that Frank and I were going to commit suicide, I couldn’t imagine the fear he had felt... actually... I could. It had probably been as strong as the fear I had felt at the thought of being taken to prison. I knew I would be practically paralyzed with fright if I thought Mikey was going to hurt himself.
"It’s not funny Gee. I was on the brink of a heart attack when I got here, and then I found you curled into each other on the sofa with tear stained cheeks and looking paler than ghosts. I thought you were... both of you..." Mikey shook his head as he struggled to find words to describe how he had felt. "If you had been dead... Oh God Gee... I can’t even... that thought’s just too much..." He whispered and I reached a hand out to cup his cheek, pulling his face round to look at me.
"We're not dead Mikey, and we never intended to hurt ourselves." I said firmly and he nodded, tears glistening in his eyes. "Come here..." I whispered and he gladly curled into my arms, letting me hold him the way I used to when we were kids and he had had a nightmare. It had been some years since I had last felt such a strong feeling of brotherly protection over my little brother, and it was strange holding him now we were both full grown men and the Candy man was no longer a threat.
"I nearly sobbed with relief when I realized you were okay..." He whispered, laughing shakily. "I moved you off the sofa so that I could clean up the house - it was still a mess after the party, and even though I knew were just sleeping I kept needing to check on you both, too scared that you were going to..." He didn’t finish his sentence, and I understood why. I wouldn’t be able to say it either.
"It’s okay Mikey." I said again. "We're okay... I mean, we had a rough time with Lyn but we would never... do that to ourselves. We would never try to back out like that." I promised and Mikey nodded, pulling out of my embrace gently and looking at me intently.
"But what did happen with Lyn? She said something about a relationship... I mean... I guess it would be stupid to ask between who, after seeing you on the sofa like that..." Mikeys voice was soft and I felt a wave of relief wash over me as I realized he wasn’t going to reject us like Lyn had.
"She... she didn’t accept it..." I whispered and I felt a lump rise in my throat. Mikey touched my shoulder sympathetically.
"Why didn’t you tell me Gee? I mean... I had an idea of course, I knew you liked him... But... I just don’t understand why you'd tell her before you told me... your own brother..." I could hear the hurt in his voice and I shook my head frantically, putting my coffee down and grabbing his shoulders, needing him to understand.
"No, Mikey it wasn’t like that!" I said quickly. "We never told Lyn, she found out... she heard Frank saying... We tried to deny it but we couldn’t, it was too late, I wanted to tell you and Ma' before anyone else but then Lyn threatened to go the police and..." My voice cracked a little, the fear and rejection of the previous day still fresh.
"It was hell Mikey... I was so afraid... so sure I would lose him..." I whimpered and Mikeys face crumpled, my words only reflected what he had felt when he thought he would find us both dead, and we both shared a sick sense of happiness that we both knew how the other had felt. How the fear would still mess with us for days to come.
"You really love him Gee." I think it was meant to be a question but it came out as a statement and I nodded without hesitation.
"More than anything... he's my whole world Mikey, I cant live without him..." Mikey smiled softly and nodded, I looked deep into his eyes and I nearly cried out with joy as I saw that he truly understood, that he would never reject us, never feel confusion or hatred over what we had. I knew I could count on Mikey, we had always been close, he had always understood me, and I had always understood him.
"Oh... Lyn said something else." He said suddenly and I frowned.
"What?" I asked, thinking of Lyn left a bitter taste in my mouth. I was so hurt that she had betrayed us like this, rejected us when I thought she was our friend.
"She said to tell you... if you were... ya' know... okay... that she's truly sorry. And she hopes you will at least believe her even if you wont forgive her." Mikey said gently, seeing the pain in my eyes at the mention of her and I nodded.
"O - Okay..." I choked. I was not prepared to comment on that, and Mikey knew that. He pulled me into a tight embrace and clung to him, breathing deeply as I allowed my nerves to calm. The worst of the storm had blown over, and though I was still feeling exhausted I was also relieved. Mikey knew, and he didn’t look at me any differently. He was still my baby brother, he was still here for me just as much as I was there for him.
"Thanks Mikes." I whispered and he pulled back a little, tilting his head to the side.
"For what?" He smiled.
"For everything." I grinned and he laughed, hugging me again quickly before pulling back as we heard a quiet 'Gee?' coming from the other room.
"That'll be Frank." Mikey stated the obvious and I nodded, already getting off the bed. "Go tell him I know everything, and make sure he's okay." Mikey smiled as I walked over to the door.
"I will." I said quickly, disappearing down the hallway to the next room and walking through the doorway to see Frank sitting up in bed, rubbing his eyes and looking as dazed as I had. A smile of relief tugged at his lips when he saw me and I ran over to him, sitting beside him on the bed and pulling him into my arms, allowing him to snuggle into me and kiss the side of my neck.
"Why aren’t we on the sofa?" He asked, giggling a little and I kissed his forehead.
"Mikey moved us." I said and Frank frowned in confusion, looking over to the doorway as Mikey walked into the room. "Lyn called him and told him that we were... that we were going to do something stupid... ya' know... kill ourselves..." I had never spoken such strange words and Frank gave a look of horror, I brushed my hand soothingly through his hair and quickly gave a brief outline of what she had said and how Mikey now knew about us.
"So... you...you know...?" Frank whispered, looking over at Mikey with worried eyes. Mikey smiled and nodded, walking over to us and sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Yeah... I had an idea anyway, and I think you two are perfect together." He said sweetly, answering Frank’s unasked question as to whether he accepted us or not. The look of pure relief that washed over Franks face made my heart pang with love for him and my brother both and the tears welled up in his eyes slowly.
"M - Mikey..." He sniffled and Mikey laughed hugging Frank and I both at the same time.
"I know I know, I'm the worlds most awesome guy ever and everyone should totally kiss my ass cheeks because I am like God almighty and just amazing in every way." He smirked and I laughed, relishing the delicious feeling of it and the sound of Frank and Mikey laughing along with me. It sounded like...
It sounded like freedom.
Thanks again.
Rayray xox
"Uhm...Frankie..." I shifted a little and moved my arm out to hug Frank close to me... but there was no Frank to hold. I frowned and smoothed my hand across the mattress looking for him... wait...
Mattress?
My eyelids fluttered open and I blinked roughly, rubbing my eyes with one fist as I propped myself up on my elbow, looking around me as my head swam a little from sleep. I was in my bed, and I was alone. I was certain I had been on the sofa when I fell asleep and I had been with Frank... surely he wouldn’t have been able to move me into my bed. Not on his own anyway. I sat up and felt my heart rate increase even as I tried to convince myself not to worry. But waking up in the wrong place and without my boyfriend was playing on my nerves which were already on edge, raw from the past couple of days.
"F - Frankie?" I croaked, my voice was hoarse and my throat burned from all the crying and shouting that had happened the previous day. I cleared my throat and tried again.
"Frankie!?" My voice was a little louder this time, but no stronger and I began to panic more. If I was feeling so shit then how was Frank? He had been just as upset, if not more upset than I had been. Where was he? What had happened while I had been asleep? Was it the police? Had Lyn been angry that we didn’t accept her apology and gone to the police after all? The thought made my stomach churn sickeningly and I groaned to myself, I couldn’t take this much more. I was on the brink of a meltdown, and beginning to welcome it with open arms.
"Hey bro', I was starting to wonder when you'd wake up." I blinked in surprise at Mikey who appeared in my doorway; he was holding to cups of coffee and had black rings under his eyes, though he didn’t look tired. He walked softly into the room and put the cups down onto the bedside table before dropping gently onto the edge of the bed beside me.
"Mikey?" I stared at him confusion. What was he doing here?
"Hey." He gave a soft smile and the way he was speaking did nothing to calm my nerves. He sounded as if someone had just died. As if he had to be the one to break the news to me. Panic flooded my chest and the tears rose in my eyes before I could stop them.
"Oh God... Frankie - where’s Frankie!?" I cried, going to dive out of the bed but Mikey pressed a hand to my chest and pushed me back down, hushing me.
"Its okay Gee, its okay - he's okay. He's asleep right now, he's fine -" Mikey kept a hand on my chest and I knew he could feel the rapid thumping of my heart beneath his palm.
"He's fine." He repeated his voice gentle but firm and I forced myself to take a deep breath, tipping my head back and breathing out after a small pause, some of the panic fading.
"Good...Good..." I swallowed deeply, my throat aching and I opened my eyes to see Mikey looking at me with concern. "What are you doing here?" I asked, there was something wrong... I knew there was. I could see it in his face, read it in his body language as he handed me one of the coffees and I gulped the hot liquid down gratefully, soothing my raw throat.
"I got a call from a girl yesterday..." He said quietly and I frowned, not understanding. "Her name was Lindsey." Mikey added and my lips parted in surprise, realization dawning on me.
"She told me that she had been to see you and was worried about you." He continued and I clamped my mouth shut. I didn’t know what to say, so I just let Mikey continue.
"She said that she had come to apologize to you for over reacting about your relationship. And that when she left you had been really angry, and that Frank was distraught." Mikey frowned a little. "She said she thought you were going to hurt yourselves, and that I needed to get over here quickly before you did something stupid." I blinked in surprise and I could see the accusing look in Mikeys eyes.
"W - What? What stupid things?" I whispered and Mikey tutted, rolling his eyes.
"Use your imagination Gee. She made it out like you two were gonna kill yourselves. You have no idea how scared I was - I nearly ran over an old woman I drove over here so fast!" Even in the current situation I couldn’t help but snort with laughter and Mikey scowled, but his eyes softened a little with relief. Clearly he really had believed that Frank and I were going to commit suicide, I couldn’t imagine the fear he had felt... actually... I could. It had probably been as strong as the fear I had felt at the thought of being taken to prison. I knew I would be practically paralyzed with fright if I thought Mikey was going to hurt himself.
"It’s not funny Gee. I was on the brink of a heart attack when I got here, and then I found you curled into each other on the sofa with tear stained cheeks and looking paler than ghosts. I thought you were... both of you..." Mikey shook his head as he struggled to find words to describe how he had felt. "If you had been dead... Oh God Gee... I can’t even... that thought’s just too much..." He whispered and I reached a hand out to cup his cheek, pulling his face round to look at me.
"We're not dead Mikey, and we never intended to hurt ourselves." I said firmly and he nodded, tears glistening in his eyes. "Come here..." I whispered and he gladly curled into my arms, letting me hold him the way I used to when we were kids and he had had a nightmare. It had been some years since I had last felt such a strong feeling of brotherly protection over my little brother, and it was strange holding him now we were both full grown men and the Candy man was no longer a threat.
"I nearly sobbed with relief when I realized you were okay..." He whispered, laughing shakily. "I moved you off the sofa so that I could clean up the house - it was still a mess after the party, and even though I knew were just sleeping I kept needing to check on you both, too scared that you were going to..." He didn’t finish his sentence, and I understood why. I wouldn’t be able to say it either.
"It’s okay Mikey." I said again. "We're okay... I mean, we had a rough time with Lyn but we would never... do that to ourselves. We would never try to back out like that." I promised and Mikey nodded, pulling out of my embrace gently and looking at me intently.
"But what did happen with Lyn? She said something about a relationship... I mean... I guess it would be stupid to ask between who, after seeing you on the sofa like that..." Mikeys voice was soft and I felt a wave of relief wash over me as I realized he wasn’t going to reject us like Lyn had.
"She... she didn’t accept it..." I whispered and I felt a lump rise in my throat. Mikey touched my shoulder sympathetically.
"Why didn’t you tell me Gee? I mean... I had an idea of course, I knew you liked him... But... I just don’t understand why you'd tell her before you told me... your own brother..." I could hear the hurt in his voice and I shook my head frantically, putting my coffee down and grabbing his shoulders, needing him to understand.
"No, Mikey it wasn’t like that!" I said quickly. "We never told Lyn, she found out... she heard Frank saying... We tried to deny it but we couldn’t, it was too late, I wanted to tell you and Ma' before anyone else but then Lyn threatened to go the police and..." My voice cracked a little, the fear and rejection of the previous day still fresh.
"It was hell Mikey... I was so afraid... so sure I would lose him..." I whimpered and Mikeys face crumpled, my words only reflected what he had felt when he thought he would find us both dead, and we both shared a sick sense of happiness that we both knew how the other had felt. How the fear would still mess with us for days to come.
"You really love him Gee." I think it was meant to be a question but it came out as a statement and I nodded without hesitation.
"More than anything... he's my whole world Mikey, I cant live without him..." Mikey smiled softly and nodded, I looked deep into his eyes and I nearly cried out with joy as I saw that he truly understood, that he would never reject us, never feel confusion or hatred over what we had. I knew I could count on Mikey, we had always been close, he had always understood me, and I had always understood him.
"Oh... Lyn said something else." He said suddenly and I frowned.
"What?" I asked, thinking of Lyn left a bitter taste in my mouth. I was so hurt that she had betrayed us like this, rejected us when I thought she was our friend.
"She said to tell you... if you were... ya' know... okay... that she's truly sorry. And she hopes you will at least believe her even if you wont forgive her." Mikey said gently, seeing the pain in my eyes at the mention of her and I nodded.
"O - Okay..." I choked. I was not prepared to comment on that, and Mikey knew that. He pulled me into a tight embrace and clung to him, breathing deeply as I allowed my nerves to calm. The worst of the storm had blown over, and though I was still feeling exhausted I was also relieved. Mikey knew, and he didn’t look at me any differently. He was still my baby brother, he was still here for me just as much as I was there for him.
"Thanks Mikes." I whispered and he pulled back a little, tilting his head to the side.
"For what?" He smiled.
"For everything." I grinned and he laughed, hugging me again quickly before pulling back as we heard a quiet 'Gee?' coming from the other room.
"That'll be Frank." Mikey stated the obvious and I nodded, already getting off the bed. "Go tell him I know everything, and make sure he's okay." Mikey smiled as I walked over to the door.
"I will." I said quickly, disappearing down the hallway to the next room and walking through the doorway to see Frank sitting up in bed, rubbing his eyes and looking as dazed as I had. A smile of relief tugged at his lips when he saw me and I ran over to him, sitting beside him on the bed and pulling him into my arms, allowing him to snuggle into me and kiss the side of my neck.
"Why aren’t we on the sofa?" He asked, giggling a little and I kissed his forehead.
"Mikey moved us." I said and Frank frowned in confusion, looking over to the doorway as Mikey walked into the room. "Lyn called him and told him that we were... that we were going to do something stupid... ya' know... kill ourselves..." I had never spoken such strange words and Frank gave a look of horror, I brushed my hand soothingly through his hair and quickly gave a brief outline of what she had said and how Mikey now knew about us.
"So... you...you know...?" Frank whispered, looking over at Mikey with worried eyes. Mikey smiled and nodded, walking over to us and sitting on the edge of the bed.
"Yeah... I had an idea anyway, and I think you two are perfect together." He said sweetly, answering Frank’s unasked question as to whether he accepted us or not. The look of pure relief that washed over Franks face made my heart pang with love for him and my brother both and the tears welled up in his eyes slowly.
"M - Mikey..." He sniffled and Mikey laughed hugging Frank and I both at the same time.
"I know I know, I'm the worlds most awesome guy ever and everyone should totally kiss my ass cheeks because I am like God almighty and just amazing in every way." He smirked and I laughed, relishing the delicious feeling of it and the sound of Frank and Mikey laughing along with me. It sounded like...
It sounded like freedom.
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