Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Hey there (in review)
I sighed heavily. “I suppose I’ll go from the start.” I took a deep breath and looked at Gerard. He gave me an encouraging grin.
“Remember I said that his mom knows my mom?” Gerard nodded but said nothing. “Well, his mom knew my mom. She died a few years ago. I still can’t get my head around it and sometimes it feels like she never left. Frank was my best friend, my only friend. I loved him. More than life itself. He didn’t feel the same at the time obviously but that’s beside the point. The day she died,-” my voice cracked and my eyes stung “the day she died, Frank was there. She fell… she tripped and she fell down the stairs… she snapped her neck. She was dead before she hit the bottom. Frank was there, he called the ambulance. He held me as I sobbed over her body. Bent awkwardly from the fall. He held my hand as they zipped up the body bag. Her face was white by then…” tears fell silently into my lap as I continued “He came with me to the morgue and he watched with me as they closed the door on the slab. He held me as I cried that night, and the next. He swore to me that he’d be there when I needed him, he held my hand throughout the funeral and when I threw the first handful of dirt on top of her coffin and had to watch as my mother, my only parent I had ever known was taken from me for good. He stayed with me that night. I was on my own in the world now. I was only 16 and suddenly I was completely alone. He stayed with me that night and he comforted me. We slept together that night. I was desperate for love and for someone to hold me and tell me I was special. When I woke up the next morning, he was gone. He took my heart that night and ripped it to pieces. I saw him a few days later when I plucked up the courage to finally leave my house. I needed to get groceries. I saw him with her. Emily. Apparently she called him the morning after he was with me and ordered him to come over to hers. He went and he left me, broken and empty, to go be with her.” My hands curled into fists and my nails bit into my palms. “Two days later, there were the happiest couple in the goddamn world and I was left with nothing. He left me for a slut that cheated on him within a month. He left me to heal on my own with no one to help me. And I forgave him…” I finished pitifully. I unfurled my fists; my nails had cut into my palms leaving crescent shaped cuts. Gerard was silent.
“Say something” I muttered not making eye contact.
“Jesus Christ Sar… I’d never have thought…”
“Yeah, I’ve learned to control my emotions by now. I’ve had three years to deal with it.”
“Your 19?”
“Um yes? Why does that matter?”
“I thought you were older is all…”
“Why? You can’t be much older than me like. I’m only a year older than Frank”
“And I’m 5 years older than Frank…”
“No way! You look around the same age like! So you’re like how old? 23?”
“Pretty much. Is that weird?”
“What? No. Why would it be?”
“No reason… So anyway. Why did you forgive Frank?”
“My mom always said forgive and forget. And Frank told me sorry.”
“Hes got a girlfriend Sar…”
“He what? Then why? I don’t understand…”
“Hes still dating her.” I knew exactly who he meant. My blood boiled.
“Asshole” I hissed “He kissed me and he has a girlfriend. What did he expect me to be the bit on the side or something?! The faithful DOG that always comes back to him.” Anger radiated from my every limb. I saw Gerard shrink back as I glared at him. Obviously my face was something you had to see and fear.
“Frank is Frank. He cheats on her every chance he gets. It’s not a very conventional relationship they have. Its just kinda…” he trailed off.
“Whatever. Hes a free agent. And so am I. Why should I care?! I’m gonna go out tonight and get royally sloshed! You up for it?!”
“Depends where your going!”
“A club more than likely. I want to dance.” I grinned.
“I’m not one for dancing really” He grumbled.
“That’s fine, you can sit and mind my handbag and a table for us”
“Us?”
“Yeah! You won’t dance with me so I have to bring a friend”
“Okay, Sar?”
“What?”
“Are you okay? Seriously?” He studied my face as he spoke.
“I’m just peachy. No, really, I’m fine. I promise” I smiled. His concern was completely legitimate and it made me feel warm inside.
“Come to mine later for drinks?”
“Sure, eh what numbers your house?”
“33, come over at like 9, I should be dressed by then.”
“Cool” He grinned.
“I’ll see you then. And thanks for taking care of me” I bent and kissed him on the cheek quickly as I darted from the room and out the front door.
“Remember I said that his mom knows my mom?” Gerard nodded but said nothing. “Well, his mom knew my mom. She died a few years ago. I still can’t get my head around it and sometimes it feels like she never left. Frank was my best friend, my only friend. I loved him. More than life itself. He didn’t feel the same at the time obviously but that’s beside the point. The day she died,-” my voice cracked and my eyes stung “the day she died, Frank was there. She fell… she tripped and she fell down the stairs… she snapped her neck. She was dead before she hit the bottom. Frank was there, he called the ambulance. He held me as I sobbed over her body. Bent awkwardly from the fall. He held my hand as they zipped up the body bag. Her face was white by then…” tears fell silently into my lap as I continued “He came with me to the morgue and he watched with me as they closed the door on the slab. He held me as I cried that night, and the next. He swore to me that he’d be there when I needed him, he held my hand throughout the funeral and when I threw the first handful of dirt on top of her coffin and had to watch as my mother, my only parent I had ever known was taken from me for good. He stayed with me that night. I was on my own in the world now. I was only 16 and suddenly I was completely alone. He stayed with me that night and he comforted me. We slept together that night. I was desperate for love and for someone to hold me and tell me I was special. When I woke up the next morning, he was gone. He took my heart that night and ripped it to pieces. I saw him a few days later when I plucked up the courage to finally leave my house. I needed to get groceries. I saw him with her. Emily. Apparently she called him the morning after he was with me and ordered him to come over to hers. He went and he left me, broken and empty, to go be with her.” My hands curled into fists and my nails bit into my palms. “Two days later, there were the happiest couple in the goddamn world and I was left with nothing. He left me for a slut that cheated on him within a month. He left me to heal on my own with no one to help me. And I forgave him…” I finished pitifully. I unfurled my fists; my nails had cut into my palms leaving crescent shaped cuts. Gerard was silent.
“Say something” I muttered not making eye contact.
“Jesus Christ Sar… I’d never have thought…”
“Yeah, I’ve learned to control my emotions by now. I’ve had three years to deal with it.”
“Your 19?”
“Um yes? Why does that matter?”
“I thought you were older is all…”
“Why? You can’t be much older than me like. I’m only a year older than Frank”
“And I’m 5 years older than Frank…”
“No way! You look around the same age like! So you’re like how old? 23?”
“Pretty much. Is that weird?”
“What? No. Why would it be?”
“No reason… So anyway. Why did you forgive Frank?”
“My mom always said forgive and forget. And Frank told me sorry.”
“Hes got a girlfriend Sar…”
“He what? Then why? I don’t understand…”
“Hes still dating her.” I knew exactly who he meant. My blood boiled.
“Asshole” I hissed “He kissed me and he has a girlfriend. What did he expect me to be the bit on the side or something?! The faithful DOG that always comes back to him.” Anger radiated from my every limb. I saw Gerard shrink back as I glared at him. Obviously my face was something you had to see and fear.
“Frank is Frank. He cheats on her every chance he gets. It’s not a very conventional relationship they have. Its just kinda…” he trailed off.
“Whatever. Hes a free agent. And so am I. Why should I care?! I’m gonna go out tonight and get royally sloshed! You up for it?!”
“Depends where your going!”
“A club more than likely. I want to dance.” I grinned.
“I’m not one for dancing really” He grumbled.
“That’s fine, you can sit and mind my handbag and a table for us”
“Us?”
“Yeah! You won’t dance with me so I have to bring a friend”
“Okay, Sar?”
“What?”
“Are you okay? Seriously?” He studied my face as he spoke.
“I’m just peachy. No, really, I’m fine. I promise” I smiled. His concern was completely legitimate and it made me feel warm inside.
“Come to mine later for drinks?”
“Sure, eh what numbers your house?”
“33, come over at like 9, I should be dressed by then.”
“Cool” He grinned.
“I’ll see you then. And thanks for taking care of me” I bent and kissed him on the cheek quickly as I darted from the room and out the front door.
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