Categories > Original > Humor
Reviews
Chosen
(#) Ithilwen 2006-04-10
This wasn't as funny as it could have been. The way you build it up, it's far too obvious that whoever's on the other side won't be what Marie expects.
Perhaps you should remove the "this is a Mary Sue parody" tipoff from the summary and use it as ending credits instead.Chosen
(#) MarkPoa 2006-04-14
I found that as a one-joke offering... it's at least effective as a short. I was honestly expecting something longer with the description of a "Mary Sue parody". But, I thought the fact that she had a sword and gem ready on hand was pretty fun. Could probably use a bit of a funnier line at the end, but the one there now is adequate.
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