Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > So Shut Your Eyes
That night as Willow crawled into bed she saw that Gerard was staring at the ceiling. She settled in then pulled the comforter up to her chin.
“Can I ask you a question?” Gerard’s voice was very low.
Willow looked over at him. “Sure.”
“Today was a pretty good day for Mikey, wasn’t it?”
She smiled, “Yes, it was. He’s learning how to accept his new ability. He did a good job understanding what the little girl was trying to tell him.”
“Man, this is still so hard for me to believe sometimes.” Gerard admitted. “I mean shit, my brother sees ghosts.”
“And is learning to communicate with them.” Willow added.
Gerard wanted to take her in his arms. The desire to feel the electricity between them had been growing since she’d gotten into bed but he forced himself not to move. At least not yet because wanted to talk to her. His mind was confused and he was looking for answers.
“So why aren’t I happy about this?” He asked bluntly.
Willow was pleasantly surprised by his honestly. “Because it means that Mikey can do something you can’t.”
He frowned, “Well that makes me a dick, doesn’t it? You really think that’s why I’m not happy about this?”
“Look.” Willow leaned up on her elbow to look down into his face. “It just makes you human. He’s your brother and you love him but at the same time you have always been the one who was more recognized for your talents. Now Mikey has a talent you don’t so it’s only natural you’d feel like this.”
He shook his head, “Mikey is very talented.”
“I didn’t say he wasn’t. I said you are more recognized for your talents.”
Gerard moved into the same position as Willow so he could lean on his elbow. “You’ve said that before. Mikey was in my shadow.”
“That’s not your fault.” Willow said softly.
“But maybe it is.” Gerard said thinking out loud. “Maybe I haven’t been a very good brother to him.”
“He thinks the world of you.” She looked deep into his eyes so he would understand.
“You know that?”
She nodded, “Yes, I’ve heard his thoughts. I wasn’t trying to but today when he asked me how to understand the little girl I had to listen to his thoughts to help him.”
“But why would he have been thinking of me at that time?”
Willow smiled, “One of the strongest thoughts was ‘if I can do this Gerard will be so impressed.’
“Fuck.” Gerard muttered, “He really was thinking that?”
Willow nodded, “Yes, he really was. He wants you to be proud of him. He wants you to be proud of his new ability. It’s so important to him that you don’t think this makes him some sort of freak.”
“I would never think that.” Gerard protested.
“Because he’s your brother and you love him.” Willow said softly.
Gerard noticed. “But I thought it about you, right?”
“Please don’t deny that.” Willow said still looking away.
He couldn’t stop himself. He reached over and pulled her to him. “I was a fool. But to be honest things have been pretty unusual since I met you.” He stroked her bare arm. “Tell me this feeling, this fuckin’ electricity isn’t unusual.”
“I can’t and I don’t understand it.” She knew that was what he was wondering.
“Willow you scare and at the same time excite the hell out of me.”
“I can tell.” She teased feeling his growing erection pressing against her thigh.
Gerard laughed, “Yeah, well no hiding the excite part. I don’t know why I feel this when I touch you but I’m not complaining.”
“Me either.” Willow reached down and brushed her fingers over the straining material of his pajama pants. “Not complaining at all.”
Still Gerard tried not to give into the temptation. As much as his body wanted to take her his mind was fighting it. This place made him uneasy.
Willow wondered why he wasn’t acting on the response his body was giving her. She looked into his eyes. He closed them in an effort to hide his feelings. Willow took it as a sign he didn’t really want this. She removed her hand and rolled back over to her side of the bed.
Gerard opened his eyes when he felt her move away. She looked hurt. “Damn it. It’s not that I don’t want you. But I feel so fucking nervous here, in this room. I feel like someone might be watching me.”
She couldn’t help it, she laughed. “I’d tell you if we were sharing space with someone else.” It was good to know he wasn’t rejecting her, just upset about a possible ghost visit.
He chucked, “Well you can’t blame me. Shit, I don’t want that one coming back and trying to strangle me again.”
“She did it for you.” Willow said softly. “She was only acting on the emotions you were putting out there. First the pleasure then the guilt that demanded pain.”
Gerard thought a moment. “So then I shouldn’t worry. I mean you and I can have as much pleasure as we want and I won’t have to deal with guilt. I’ve got no one in my life I’m cheating on now.”
“True.” Willow whispered. She didn’t voice the fact that the woman was still drawn to Gerard. For now they were alone and her body was craving his touch.
“So I think pleasure is in order, don’t you?’ He reached over and caressed her breast through the sheer material of her gown.
Willows answered breathlessly, “It is in order.”
Gerard pulled her over this time settling her over his body. His hands pushed up her gown to bare her back to his fingers. Lightly he caressed her soft skin.
“Sugar, you make me so fuckin’ hot.” He whispered.
Willow was about to tell him she was on fire when a loud knock on the door caused them both to freeze.
“What the hell?”
Willow rolled off him allowing him to slide out of bed. He tried to adjust his pajama bottoms to hide his erection as he headed for the door. Pulling it open he saw Bob standing in the hallway looking very upset.
“What’s up?” Gerard asked.
Bob ignored him and looked across the room to Willow who was sitting up in bed. “Uh, something is in my room.”
“Something?” Gerard repeated trying to discover why his friend looked so shaken.
Bob nodded, “Yeah, something. It filled up the bathtub first.”
Willow got out of bed and threw on her robe while Bob was still explaining.
“So I got up and turned off the water.” Bob continued. “Then I got back in bed and well…and then something pulled all the blankets off my bed.”
“You sure they didn’t just side off?” Gerard asked. None of this sounded all that serious and he really wanted to get back to what he and Willow had been doing before the interruption.
Willow moved to stand beside Gerard. She was concentrating on Bob’s thoughts. They were loud and clear. He was angry to have found her in Gerard’s bed and he was very frightened. The combination was never good. “Let’s go see what’s going on.” Willow smiled to Bob.
He nodded and turned back towards his room. Willow started to follow him with Gerard close on her heels. She turned back slightly to speak to him. “Maybe it would be best if you just wait for me in the room.”
He continued walking with her. “No, I’m going with you.” His tone left no room for argument.
Bob stopped at his bedroom door and looked back at Willow. “I left the door open when I came to find you but it slammed closed as soon as I started down the hall.”
Willow gently nudged him out of the way and opened the door. The sight of the disarray in the room caused Bob to curse. “I sure a fuck didn’t make that mess and it didn’t look like that a minute ago.”
Willow nodded and took several steps into the room. Without warning one of Bob’s drumsticks lifted off the dresser and flew across the room directly at Willow’s head. She had sensed the energy as soon as she entered the room and her reflexes were quick. She snatched the drumstick out of the air seconds before it reached its intended target, her head.
“Fuck.” Gerard grabbed her arm intending to pull her from the room.
Willow shook off his hand. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”
“That almost fuckin’ hit you.” Bob said in shock.
“It doesn’t want me here. It knows I am aware.” Willow’s eyes were searching the room.
“It?” Gerard questioned.
Willow nodded still looking around the room. “A poltergeist.” She answered. “An angry poltergeist.”
“So you don’t know if it’s male of female?” Bob edged towards Willow. He wanted to be ready if something else threatened her.
“Sometimes they appear in a human form.” Willow realized she no longer sensed the energy. It has left the room. “Sometimes they are just like a veil of smoke. No form just energy. But it’s gone now.”
Bob looked around the room. “Are you sure?”
“Very sure.” Willow smiled over at him. “Sorry but there is nothing I can do now. It knew as soon as I walked in that I could sense it. That was what made it angry. Did it do anything else before you came to get me?”
Bob shook his head. “Nope just the tub water and the covers. Oh and it slammed the door.” He added.
“It was messing with you.” Willow explained. “Most poltergeists are harmless. They just like to get attention.”
“That one wasn’t harmless. It almost hit your head with my drumstick.” Bob said clearly confused.
Gerard agreed, “Yeah, that wasn’t just playing, that was dangerous.”
“And how did you catch that thing?” Bob asked in awe. “That was fuckin’ cool how you snatched it out of the air.”
Willow laughed, “I sensed the direction the poltergeist was in and my senses were on high alert.”
“Has that happened to you before?” Gerard asked.
“A few time.” She admitted. “First time that ever happened I wasn’t expecting it.” She laughed softly, “And it hurt.”
Gerard wasn’t finding any humor in the story. The idea of Willow being hurt upset him. “Well since it’s gone let’s go.” His grip on her arm tightened.
Bob saw Willow wince in pain from Gerard’s tight grip. “Hey, man.” Bob said taking a step towards Gerard. “Chill.”
Gerard glared at him. “Look it’s gone. There is nothing she can do.”
Willow tried to defuse the situation. “Bob, if it comes back let me know.”
“What, so it can throw something at you again?” Gerard asked in disbelief.
Willow sighed, “So I can try to communicate with it. Hopefully I can convince it to leave Bob alone.”
“Do you think you really could do that?” Bob sounded hopeful.
“Now that it knows I can sense it that is a possibility.”
Gerard shook his head angrily. “Well it sure as fuck didn’t want you to convince it of anything a minute ago.”
Willow tried to explain while gently trying to loosen his grip on her arm. “I caught it off guard. It wasn’t expecting Bob to bring someone in the room who could sense its presence. That upset it.”
Gerard was angry and turned on at the same time. His body was humming from holding Willow’s arm. He was angry because he wanted to get her out of this room. “Well like I said, it’s gone so let’s go.” He tried to tug on Willow’s arm.
“Bob, come and get me if it comes back.” Willow said looking directly into the drummer’s eyes. “I mean it, okay?”
He nodded, “Yeah, okay. Thanks for trying to help.”
“That’s what I’m here for.” She smiled.
Gerard’s anger flared. “You’re here to help Mikey.”
Bob glared at him. “Yeah, Gee. You keep telling yourself that.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?’ Gerard shot back.
Bob gave him a disgusted look. “You know what the fuck that means.”
Willow was tired and didn’t want to deal with his. She pulled her arm out of Gerard’s grasp. “I’m gong to bed.” She gave Bob one final smile and left the room.
“What’s your problem, man?” Gerard asked Bob as soon as she was gone.
“You’re fuckin’ sleeping with her Gee. Don’t you think it might hurt her for you to keep saying things like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like she’s just here because we hired her to help Mikey.” Bob said giving him an exasperated sigh.
Gerard tried to control his temper. “I think maybe the problem is you care for her.”
Bob shook his head, “I do but not the way you think. She’s a remarkable woman. A good woman.”
“Too good for me” Gerard challenged. “Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yeah, that is what I’m saying.” Bob stood his ground. “She doesn’t deserve to be treated like that.”
“I’ve not treated her badly.” Gerard answered narrowing his eyes.
“You’re not treating her good, either.” Bob decided to tell him exactly how he felt. “Tell me what your plans are when we leave here.”
“My plans?’ Gerard repeated. “You know we go back home and then go into the studio to record.”
Bob rolled his eyes, “Yeah I know that. I mean what are your plans concerning Willow?”
Gerard stared at him. “She’s going back to Kansas I guess.”
“So you are just gong to let her walk out of your life. That means that you are just using her while we’re here.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gerard was growing angrier by the minute. “Besides what business is it of yours?”
“Because I do care about her and don’t want to see her get hurt. She’s put her life on hold to come here to help us. All of us. You have to realize she cares about you.”
Gerard was shocked by his words. “She’s never said that.”
“You are so fuckin’ stupid sometimes.” Bob threw up his hands. “Seriously do you think Willow would sleep with you if she didn’t have feelings for you?”
Gerard was tempted to tell him about the sexual electricity that existed between himself and Willow but doubted Bob would believe it. Besides he reasoned it wasn’t his business anyway. “Willow and I have an understanding.” Gerard finally said.
Bob shook his head sadly, “She’s not like Jessica. But you’re trying to make yourself believe she is. You’re trying to convince yourself that she’s like the other women in your life who screwed you over.” He lowered his voice and looked away, “But it’s Willow who’s getting screwed over.”
Gerard had no answer for that. He was shocked. Turning quickly he left the room. Bob’s words echoed in his mind as he made his way back to the bedroom. Was Bob right? He reached the door but before he could open the door he changed his mind. He couldn’t face Willow right now. Walking back down the hall he headed towards the main staircase
“Can I ask you a question?” Gerard’s voice was very low.
Willow looked over at him. “Sure.”
“Today was a pretty good day for Mikey, wasn’t it?”
She smiled, “Yes, it was. He’s learning how to accept his new ability. He did a good job understanding what the little girl was trying to tell him.”
“Man, this is still so hard for me to believe sometimes.” Gerard admitted. “I mean shit, my brother sees ghosts.”
“And is learning to communicate with them.” Willow added.
Gerard wanted to take her in his arms. The desire to feel the electricity between them had been growing since she’d gotten into bed but he forced himself not to move. At least not yet because wanted to talk to her. His mind was confused and he was looking for answers.
“So why aren’t I happy about this?” He asked bluntly.
Willow was pleasantly surprised by his honestly. “Because it means that Mikey can do something you can’t.”
He frowned, “Well that makes me a dick, doesn’t it? You really think that’s why I’m not happy about this?”
“Look.” Willow leaned up on her elbow to look down into his face. “It just makes you human. He’s your brother and you love him but at the same time you have always been the one who was more recognized for your talents. Now Mikey has a talent you don’t so it’s only natural you’d feel like this.”
He shook his head, “Mikey is very talented.”
“I didn’t say he wasn’t. I said you are more recognized for your talents.”
Gerard moved into the same position as Willow so he could lean on his elbow. “You’ve said that before. Mikey was in my shadow.”
“That’s not your fault.” Willow said softly.
“But maybe it is.” Gerard said thinking out loud. “Maybe I haven’t been a very good brother to him.”
“He thinks the world of you.” She looked deep into his eyes so he would understand.
“You know that?”
She nodded, “Yes, I’ve heard his thoughts. I wasn’t trying to but today when he asked me how to understand the little girl I had to listen to his thoughts to help him.”
“But why would he have been thinking of me at that time?”
Willow smiled, “One of the strongest thoughts was ‘if I can do this Gerard will be so impressed.’
“Fuck.” Gerard muttered, “He really was thinking that?”
Willow nodded, “Yes, he really was. He wants you to be proud of him. He wants you to be proud of his new ability. It’s so important to him that you don’t think this makes him some sort of freak.”
“I would never think that.” Gerard protested.
“Because he’s your brother and you love him.” Willow said softly.
Gerard noticed. “But I thought it about you, right?”
“Please don’t deny that.” Willow said still looking away.
He couldn’t stop himself. He reached over and pulled her to him. “I was a fool. But to be honest things have been pretty unusual since I met you.” He stroked her bare arm. “Tell me this feeling, this fuckin’ electricity isn’t unusual.”
“I can’t and I don’t understand it.” She knew that was what he was wondering.
“Willow you scare and at the same time excite the hell out of me.”
“I can tell.” She teased feeling his growing erection pressing against her thigh.
Gerard laughed, “Yeah, well no hiding the excite part. I don’t know why I feel this when I touch you but I’m not complaining.”
“Me either.” Willow reached down and brushed her fingers over the straining material of his pajama pants. “Not complaining at all.”
Still Gerard tried not to give into the temptation. As much as his body wanted to take her his mind was fighting it. This place made him uneasy.
Willow wondered why he wasn’t acting on the response his body was giving her. She looked into his eyes. He closed them in an effort to hide his feelings. Willow took it as a sign he didn’t really want this. She removed her hand and rolled back over to her side of the bed.
Gerard opened his eyes when he felt her move away. She looked hurt. “Damn it. It’s not that I don’t want you. But I feel so fucking nervous here, in this room. I feel like someone might be watching me.”
She couldn’t help it, she laughed. “I’d tell you if we were sharing space with someone else.” It was good to know he wasn’t rejecting her, just upset about a possible ghost visit.
He chucked, “Well you can’t blame me. Shit, I don’t want that one coming back and trying to strangle me again.”
“She did it for you.” Willow said softly. “She was only acting on the emotions you were putting out there. First the pleasure then the guilt that demanded pain.”
Gerard thought a moment. “So then I shouldn’t worry. I mean you and I can have as much pleasure as we want and I won’t have to deal with guilt. I’ve got no one in my life I’m cheating on now.”
“True.” Willow whispered. She didn’t voice the fact that the woman was still drawn to Gerard. For now they were alone and her body was craving his touch.
“So I think pleasure is in order, don’t you?’ He reached over and caressed her breast through the sheer material of her gown.
Willows answered breathlessly, “It is in order.”
Gerard pulled her over this time settling her over his body. His hands pushed up her gown to bare her back to his fingers. Lightly he caressed her soft skin.
“Sugar, you make me so fuckin’ hot.” He whispered.
Willow was about to tell him she was on fire when a loud knock on the door caused them both to freeze.
“What the hell?”
Willow rolled off him allowing him to slide out of bed. He tried to adjust his pajama bottoms to hide his erection as he headed for the door. Pulling it open he saw Bob standing in the hallway looking very upset.
“What’s up?” Gerard asked.
Bob ignored him and looked across the room to Willow who was sitting up in bed. “Uh, something is in my room.”
“Something?” Gerard repeated trying to discover why his friend looked so shaken.
Bob nodded, “Yeah, something. It filled up the bathtub first.”
Willow got out of bed and threw on her robe while Bob was still explaining.
“So I got up and turned off the water.” Bob continued. “Then I got back in bed and well…and then something pulled all the blankets off my bed.”
“You sure they didn’t just side off?” Gerard asked. None of this sounded all that serious and he really wanted to get back to what he and Willow had been doing before the interruption.
Willow moved to stand beside Gerard. She was concentrating on Bob’s thoughts. They were loud and clear. He was angry to have found her in Gerard’s bed and he was very frightened. The combination was never good. “Let’s go see what’s going on.” Willow smiled to Bob.
He nodded and turned back towards his room. Willow started to follow him with Gerard close on her heels. She turned back slightly to speak to him. “Maybe it would be best if you just wait for me in the room.”
He continued walking with her. “No, I’m going with you.” His tone left no room for argument.
Bob stopped at his bedroom door and looked back at Willow. “I left the door open when I came to find you but it slammed closed as soon as I started down the hall.”
Willow gently nudged him out of the way and opened the door. The sight of the disarray in the room caused Bob to curse. “I sure a fuck didn’t make that mess and it didn’t look like that a minute ago.”
Willow nodded and took several steps into the room. Without warning one of Bob’s drumsticks lifted off the dresser and flew across the room directly at Willow’s head. She had sensed the energy as soon as she entered the room and her reflexes were quick. She snatched the drumstick out of the air seconds before it reached its intended target, her head.
“Fuck.” Gerard grabbed her arm intending to pull her from the room.
Willow shook off his hand. “It’s okay. I’m fine.”
“That almost fuckin’ hit you.” Bob said in shock.
“It doesn’t want me here. It knows I am aware.” Willow’s eyes were searching the room.
“It?” Gerard questioned.
Willow nodded still looking around the room. “A poltergeist.” She answered. “An angry poltergeist.”
“So you don’t know if it’s male of female?” Bob edged towards Willow. He wanted to be ready if something else threatened her.
“Sometimes they appear in a human form.” Willow realized she no longer sensed the energy. It has left the room. “Sometimes they are just like a veil of smoke. No form just energy. But it’s gone now.”
Bob looked around the room. “Are you sure?”
“Very sure.” Willow smiled over at him. “Sorry but there is nothing I can do now. It knew as soon as I walked in that I could sense it. That was what made it angry. Did it do anything else before you came to get me?”
Bob shook his head. “Nope just the tub water and the covers. Oh and it slammed the door.” He added.
“It was messing with you.” Willow explained. “Most poltergeists are harmless. They just like to get attention.”
“That one wasn’t harmless. It almost hit your head with my drumstick.” Bob said clearly confused.
Gerard agreed, “Yeah, that wasn’t just playing, that was dangerous.”
“And how did you catch that thing?” Bob asked in awe. “That was fuckin’ cool how you snatched it out of the air.”
Willow laughed, “I sensed the direction the poltergeist was in and my senses were on high alert.”
“Has that happened to you before?” Gerard asked.
“A few time.” She admitted. “First time that ever happened I wasn’t expecting it.” She laughed softly, “And it hurt.”
Gerard wasn’t finding any humor in the story. The idea of Willow being hurt upset him. “Well since it’s gone let’s go.” His grip on her arm tightened.
Bob saw Willow wince in pain from Gerard’s tight grip. “Hey, man.” Bob said taking a step towards Gerard. “Chill.”
Gerard glared at him. “Look it’s gone. There is nothing she can do.”
Willow tried to defuse the situation. “Bob, if it comes back let me know.”
“What, so it can throw something at you again?” Gerard asked in disbelief.
Willow sighed, “So I can try to communicate with it. Hopefully I can convince it to leave Bob alone.”
“Do you think you really could do that?” Bob sounded hopeful.
“Now that it knows I can sense it that is a possibility.”
Gerard shook his head angrily. “Well it sure as fuck didn’t want you to convince it of anything a minute ago.”
Willow tried to explain while gently trying to loosen his grip on her arm. “I caught it off guard. It wasn’t expecting Bob to bring someone in the room who could sense its presence. That upset it.”
Gerard was angry and turned on at the same time. His body was humming from holding Willow’s arm. He was angry because he wanted to get her out of this room. “Well like I said, it’s gone so let’s go.” He tried to tug on Willow’s arm.
“Bob, come and get me if it comes back.” Willow said looking directly into the drummer’s eyes. “I mean it, okay?”
He nodded, “Yeah, okay. Thanks for trying to help.”
“That’s what I’m here for.” She smiled.
Gerard’s anger flared. “You’re here to help Mikey.”
Bob glared at him. “Yeah, Gee. You keep telling yourself that.”
“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?’ Gerard shot back.
Bob gave him a disgusted look. “You know what the fuck that means.”
Willow was tired and didn’t want to deal with his. She pulled her arm out of Gerard’s grasp. “I’m gong to bed.” She gave Bob one final smile and left the room.
“What’s your problem, man?” Gerard asked Bob as soon as she was gone.
“You’re fuckin’ sleeping with her Gee. Don’t you think it might hurt her for you to keep saying things like that?”
“Like what?”
“Like she’s just here because we hired her to help Mikey.” Bob said giving him an exasperated sigh.
Gerard tried to control his temper. “I think maybe the problem is you care for her.”
Bob shook his head, “I do but not the way you think. She’s a remarkable woman. A good woman.”
“Too good for me” Gerard challenged. “Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yeah, that is what I’m saying.” Bob stood his ground. “She doesn’t deserve to be treated like that.”
“I’ve not treated her badly.” Gerard answered narrowing his eyes.
“You’re not treating her good, either.” Bob decided to tell him exactly how he felt. “Tell me what your plans are when we leave here.”
“My plans?’ Gerard repeated. “You know we go back home and then go into the studio to record.”
Bob rolled his eyes, “Yeah I know that. I mean what are your plans concerning Willow?”
Gerard stared at him. “She’s going back to Kansas I guess.”
“So you are just gong to let her walk out of your life. That means that you are just using her while we’re here.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Gerard was growing angrier by the minute. “Besides what business is it of yours?”
“Because I do care about her and don’t want to see her get hurt. She’s put her life on hold to come here to help us. All of us. You have to realize she cares about you.”
Gerard was shocked by his words. “She’s never said that.”
“You are so fuckin’ stupid sometimes.” Bob threw up his hands. “Seriously do you think Willow would sleep with you if she didn’t have feelings for you?”
Gerard was tempted to tell him about the sexual electricity that existed between himself and Willow but doubted Bob would believe it. Besides he reasoned it wasn’t his business anyway. “Willow and I have an understanding.” Gerard finally said.
Bob shook his head sadly, “She’s not like Jessica. But you’re trying to make yourself believe she is. You’re trying to convince yourself that she’s like the other women in your life who screwed you over.” He lowered his voice and looked away, “But it’s Willow who’s getting screwed over.”
Gerard had no answer for that. He was shocked. Turning quickly he left the room. Bob’s words echoed in his mind as he made his way back to the bedroom. Was Bob right? He reached the door but before he could open the door he changed his mind. He couldn’t face Willow right now. Walking back down the hall he headed towards the main staircase
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