Categories > Celebrities > Fall Out Boy > Hand of God

Not Okay

by scarsandstories93 2 reviews

Sorry it's been awhile but just had alot going on and such so this may be a little long...

Category: Fall Out Boy - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama - Warnings: [!] - Published: 2009-09-30 - Updated: 2009-09-30 - 4308 words

0Unrated
Chapter 4~ Not Okay

The same day, three in the afternoon. Cate was let in early because Patrick had found her getting out of her cab, and led her in. Inside, there were people in their seats waiting for Fall Out Boy to go on. Others were taking pictures of the odd set pieces. Patrick laughed and he put his hat on. He turned to Cate.
“Since I’m the biggest idiot the world has ever seen and I forgot my band ID card, we will need to get to the meeting room through the audience.”
“Okay…” Patrick grabbed her hand, squeezing it tightly.
“I’m going to count to three and then we’re going to run, alright?” Cate looked over at Patrick and nodded. “Okay. One,” she held his hand as tightly as he was holding hers. “two,” they got into running positions. They looked at each other and smiled. “three!” He screamed the last number and they took off, laughing. They weren’t going very fast, as they couldn’t quit their laughter. Everyone that was sitting stared at them. A few of them stood.
“Oh my God! It’s Patrick Stump!” The group of girls screamed, and Cate and Patrick turned to look at them.
“Keep going!” Patrick told Cate, and she just kept holding his hand. The two got to the stage, and they jumped up without slowing their speed. Patrick tripped on a floorboard and fell on his back, pulling Cate on top of him. She landed on his stomach, their noses touching. They grinned widely at each other, and then Cate rolled off. She offered her hand to Patrick to help him up.
“You’re no fun. You couldn’t have stayed there to let me enjoy the moment?” She laughed at him.
“Nope. Besides, in a few minutes there’s going to be a room full of people wanting to meet all of Fall Out Boy, and if you’re not there Pete’s going to blow a fuse.” He laughed and took Cate’s hand, pulling himself to his feet.
“So how long are you here? I’d really like you see you again after this.” Patrick wiped an astray piece of Cate’s hair behind her ear. She smiled.
“I’d like to see you, too. Richard and I are here until next Friday, midday.” He smiled, wanting to spend every bit of spare time he had with her. He put his arm around her waist, and she put her head on his shoulder. He took Cate down a backstage hallway, and she could see and hear the opening bands either practicing or chatting up a storm. Eventually they found a door that had a removable plaque that read “Fall Out Boy Meet-And-Greet”. Patrick knocked, and Pete’s voice answered.
“Who goes there?”
“Pete, open the door.”
“Am I speaking to the real Patrick Stump, or an imposter?”
“If you don’t open the door, I’m going to go back home with Cate and never play Fall Out Boy again.” Pete laughed on the other side and unlocked the door. He let Patrick and Cate in. The room was a warm orange color, and the couches were a dark navy blue. By the front entrance, a long table was set up for autographs, and a bodyguard stood on the opposite side to take away crazy fans. Andy was sitting on the three-seater couch drinking a bottle of water and stretching for all of his drumming to come. Joe came out of a bathroom, sniffing the last of his white cocaine dust. He got a water bottle and started gulping it down. As he finished, he got out his Washburn Idol and started playing short riffs. Cate met their eyes and they looked away. Pete closed the door and locked it again.
“So Patrick, are you ready to meet the crazed and obsessed?” He laughed and Cate looked at her feet. Patrick pulled her closer to him and she smiled slightly.
“I guess so. Is it just me, or do these things really pump you up for the show?”
“Hallelujah to that, Stump-man!” Joe got up and high-fived Patrick, then moved to Pete’s left and Andy got on his right.
“So Patrick,” Andy started. “who’s your girl?” He motioned to Cate.
“Oh! Yeah, guys, this is Cate. She’ll be in town until next Friday.” Joe and Andy waved at her.
“Hey, Cate.” They both said. She blushed a bit.
“Hi.” Everyone stood there, an awkward silence between them, and then a watch alarm went off. Andy looked at his arm.
“Uh oh. Brace yourselves.” All the guys laughed, and Patrick took Cate over to a loveseat. Andy sat back on the couch and started drumming on his knee. Joe put his guitar away and past on the opposite side of the couch Andy was on. Pete took his post by the autograph table, getting out a pocket mirror to put on his eyeliner. Cate looked at him, confused.
“Pete, why are you putting on eyeliner? You’re a guy.” Pete looked up from his mirror and laughed.
“That was a really good one. Hey, wouldn’t it be cool if all guys wore eyeliner? It would be a trend: guyliner.” Andy was shaking his head; Joe groaned and threw Andy’s water bottle at Pete’s head. Patrick just smiled a little, his lips pulling up more in the right corner. Cate still was confused. He put his arm around her and she put her head on his shoulder.
“Pete and his stupid fashion ideas. I listen to this every tour…” Cate laughed and Patrick held her tighter. After everyone calmed down, a large crowd collected at the door, and the guard in the room opened the barrier door.
Guys and girls alike were lining up for Pete to sign their Take This To Your Grave album covers. One person brought their bass guitar for him to sign. All the while Pete was smiling, and occasionally he’d look over at Patrick with Cate. Other fans were collecting around Joe and Andy. A few of them had markers and drumsticks or a drumstick holder for Andy to scribble on. A couple had Joe sign their forearms. He was too high to make something legible, but he did it to make them happy. Why isn’t anyone talking to Patrick? Cate wondered, and just as she ended her thought, three girls, all blond, walked up to her and Patrick. There were three guys, all with brownish black hair, and they had their arms crossed. Cate assumed that the guys were the girls’ boyfriends. One of the girls, she had gray eyes, came up to Patrick first. She looked at Cate before speaking. Patrick released her and talked to the girl.
“So what can I do for you three ladies?” He smiled at them. Cate got up to get items from the other guys (she needed something to show Richard). All the girls blushed. The one with the gray eyes started talking.
“Um, we were wondering if…it was okay with your girlfriend…….if, um,….” she held out her printed picture of Patrick from the Internet, Cate noticed. “you could sign this.” The girls and Patrick looked at Cate. She waved them off.
“Why would I have a problem with Patrick giving autographs?” And she faked a laugh. All she wanted was Patrick to herself, and the girls weren’t letting her have that. Patrick took a marker from one of the others, this one had brown streaks going through her hair, and he started signing all three pictures. The girls blushed and went back to the guys they came with. Each guy looked over at Patrick before wrapping their arm around their girl’s waist. Patrick laughed a little and went to get Cate.
“Babe, you are going to have to get used to that. Besides, it was an autograph. I wouldn’t have given them a kiss even if their boyfriends had allowed it. I’m not a huge fan of blonds.” Cate smirked and came with Patrick to the couch. He kissed her cheek and she blushed. He put his arm around her shoulders.
“Alright, I’m sorry for over-reacting.”
“That’s my girl.” And he pulled her closer to him. The rest of the greeting session, no one else came up to Patrick.

An hour and a half later, Patrick walked Cate out of the backstage area before she had to go to her seat. She had a pair of drumsticks signed by Andy, a composition notebook signed by Pete on the first and last pages, and Joe gave her a package of new guitar picks that he signed. Cate was holding onto these things in a messenger bag that everyone had gotten for being backstage. Patrick held onto her waist and took her to a back corridor, which was right outside of the seating area. She wrapped her arms around his neck.
“I go on at eight, right after Panic At The Disco. I’ll be looking for you.” He kissed her lips, outlining her mouth with his tongue.
“I’m in the front row. I’ll be with the redhead.” They laughed, and she kissed his cheek. Before she left, she got out her phone. “I need something from you.”
“I forgot about that…” She found the camera setting and had Patrick put his arm around her in a casual way. Cate took the picture and showed it to him.
“I think that looks good, Patrick.” He laughed and took off his glasses.
“I guess so…” She giggled and he kissed her again, their lips barely touching. He took her phone and put his cell phone number into it. He changed the ring tone for his contact to her favorite Fall Out Boy song, Grand Theft Autumn, and had their picture to come up. Patrick gave the phone back.
“Call me when you have free time away from Richard, okay?” Cate nodded, and Patrick kissed her forehead. “I’ll see you out there.” And then he left to find the other guys, leaving Cate to go to her seat alone. She checked the time on her phone: 5PM. She still had three hours left.
She found Richard in their row, just as he said. The first opening band, Gym Class Heroes, was going to go on in ten minutes. His eyes lit up when he saw Cate coming to her seat from the ticket-taker by the entrance. Eventually she got to him, and she kissed his cheek.
“Hey, Ric.” She smiled at him.
“So how’d it go? I see you have some stuff there.” Cate blushed and brought out the messenger bag. She showed Richard everything, and he was truly astounded as to how she got all of those things from the same place. “Wow, Cate. That is some pretty cool stuff.” He hugged her. “But don’t you have anything from Patrick?” She blushed again and found her phone in her pocket. Inside her pictures files, she found the picture of her and Patrick. Cate showed it to him.
“I think it was nice of him to break away from the others to take that picture with me.” Richard smiled at her and kissed her lips.
“It sure was. You look amazing, by the way.” She hit him lightly on the arm. He gave her the cell phone back and when she put it away, Gym Class Heroes played their set. They played for twenty minutes, and then a small break before Motion City Soundtrack played their multiple songs for a half hour. After they were finished, Cate decided that she needed to use the restroom. She kissed Richard’s cheek and went to find the bathroom.
As she finished washing her hands, she could hear a familiar voice just outside the door. After listening to him speak for a couple moments, she realized that it was Patrick on his cell.
“Pete, I can’t do this. There is no way…” she heard him sigh. “I’m nervous. Like shaking until a have a seizure nervous.” Silence on his end. “No, it’s not because of her.” He started moving; Cate could hear his shoes on the linoleum. “It’s her boyfriend. I don’t know if I can go out there and sing lyrics that profess my love to her when she’ll be there with him.” She heard him breathe into the phone. “I know she’s not mine. I can’t help that. I just wish that…” A pause. “I wish that she would leave him and come with me. I haven’t felt this way before. I love her…” Patrick started choking up, and Cate decided to leave the bathroom. He looked at her as she came out. She stayed there, looking at him. “Pete, I’ll be there really soon.” He laughed “I’ll find a way.” He pressed the end button, and walked up to Cate. “I really do love you.” And then he pulled her to him, and he found her lips. Before she even had a chance to wrap her arms around his neck, he went around to the backstage area. Cate went back to her seat grinning and blushing.
Panic was performing when she got back. She didn’t know their songs like she knew Fall Out Boy, but she had heard it before. She thought it was something like “But It’s Better If You Do”, but she wasn’t sure. Richard wrapped his arm around her waist when she got to him.
“Are you okay?” Cate yawned and wiped her eyes. She kissed his cheek.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just going to sit down through these guys, though.”
“Alright.” He sat with her, and she put her head on his shoulder. Another twenty-five minutes after, Panic was finishing their last song. While she didn’t know the song very well, Cate found herself singing to the final chorus.
I’d chime in with a “Haven’t you people ever heard of
Closing the goddamn door?” No,
It’s much better to face these kinds of things
With a sense of poise and rationality.
They finished with a loud guitar strum and the lead singer introduced all of the band.
“I’m Brendon Urie,” he pointed to his left and right at the same time. “These are Ryan Ross and Spencer Smith,” Then he motioned behind him. “And that’s Jon Walker. We’re Panic! At The Disco!” The crowd erupted around the couple, and Richard pulled Cate closer to him. With that, the stage went black and the lights around them went up. She figured she had ten minutes before Fall Out Boy went on. Cate checked the time on her phone: 7:50. She sighed and put her phone away.
“Babe, I’m going to find the bathrooms.” Richard kissed her forehead and left. While he was gone, Cate scanned the stage for movement, particularly any sign of Patrick. Right before her boyfriend appeared beside her, Patrick found Cate and waved at her. She saw him, and waved back. He smiled and disappeared into the blackness of the stage wings. Cate was still smiling when Richard came up to her and attacked her lips with his. They sat together again, his arm around her and her head on his shoulder. They stayed like that until they noticed Fall Out Boy run onstage.
The crowd burst into screams all around them, and they stood up, joining in yelling. Cate could see Andy getting behind the drums and twirling a drumstick in his hand. Joe and Pete come on next, still strapping on their instruments. Then she found Patrick. He had the silver SG from his room around him, and he had the most adorable hat on. Cate really liked it. He had taken off his glasses, and she hoped that he had his contacts in. Everyone started the beginning of “Tell That Mick…”, and Pete started screaming into his microphone. Soon Patrick’s voice was heard on the speakers. Cate and Richard sang along with him.

Light that smoke. Get one for giving up on me.
And one just ‘cause they’ll kill you sooner than my expectations.
To my favorite liar, to my favorite scar: I could have died with you.
I hope you choke on those words, that kiss, that bottle. I confess.
Now ash yourself out on the insides. I said I loved you but I lied.

Let’s play this game called when you catch fire. I wouldn’t piss to put you out.
Stop burning bridges and drive off of them so I can forget about you.
So bury me in memory. His smile’s your rope. So wrap it tight around your throat.

All the girls screamed as Patrick kept singing, Cate included. Richard pulled her to him and dipped her, their lips touching. While she thought it was romantic, she hoped that Patrick didn’t see it. And when he did, there was a defined loss in the expression of his voice. He almost ran off the stage, but he knew that wouldn’t be right, so he stayed and continued playing. They got through their first three songs, all from Take This To Your Grave, and then Pete stepped up to the mic.
“We’re all so glad there was this big of a turn-out. Anyway, our new album comes out in November, and it’s different. So to give you all a taste, here’s one of our favorites. Everybody dance, dance!” Then he stepped back to let Andy start. Patrick was looking at Cate every time he sang.
“She says she’s no good with words but I’m worse. Barely stuttered a joke of a romantic, and it stuck to my tongue. Weighed down with words too overdramatic. Tonight it’s a can’t get much worse, versus no one should ever feel like. I’m two quarters and a heart down. I don’t want to forget how your voice sounds. These words are all I have so I’ll write them. You need them just to get by.” He took a breath before continuing. “ Dance, dance. We’re falling apart to half time. Dance, dance. And these are the lives you’d love to lead. Dance, this is the way they’d love if they knew how misery loved me.” Patrick looked at Cate and smiled. Luckily Richard was turned away. He started again. “You always fold just before you’re found out. Drink up, it’s last call, last resort. I’m always the first mistake and I’m two quarters and a heart down. I don’t want to forget how your voice sounds. These words are all I have so I’ll write them. You need them just to get by.” While he had to stop playing, Patrick looked directly into Cate’s eyes as he sang the next part. She could tell it was for her. “Why don’t you show me the little bit of spine you’ve been saving for his mattress, love?” Then he drew a heart in the air, blowing a kiss through it. She almost fainted into her boyfriend’s arms. The rest of the song continued that way, and Patrick stepping away from his microphone with a slight moan in his voice. He smiled at Cate as he walked off-stage to get another guitar.
They played for another hour, and the band could only play a couple more songs. They played a song from their new album, something called “Of All The Gin Joints Of All The World”, and then Pete went up to the mic again.
“Well, this is our last song of the night, and we hope to go back on tour for F.U.C.T. soon. But anyway, there was this girl Patrick and I knew, and she loved her boyfriend, but Patrick had a huge crush on her. The girl’s and her boyfriend’s relationship wasn’t working, but she refused to see it, and that didn’t make Patrick too happy.” Patrick glared at Pete, and then looked down at Cate. She was on the verge of tears, and there was Richard, holding her. Pete went on. “Patrick and I wrote this for her, and still to this day she doesn’t know we wrote it. Kinda sad, really.” Patrick knew Pete was trying to joke around, for Cate’s sake, but he noticed that she was really starting to cry. Richard was trying to talk to her, reason with her, but she wouldn’t have it. She started moving through the crowd to get away. Patrick just had to do something…
“Tonight, though, I dedicate this song to an amazing girl I met today, and I hope she knows that I’m only singing to her right now.” Cate hadn’t stopped moving, but she had slowed down. Richard was going after her. Patrick almost left himself, and then he knew….
Where is your boy tonight?
I hope he is a gentleman.
Maybe he won’t find out what I know:
you were the last good thing about this part of town.
That got her attention really fast. She whipped around, almost running into Ric. Her mascara had run down her face, leaving dark streaks on her cheeks. Her blue eyes glistened as she looked up at Patrick, and she headed back to her seat, Richard very close behind.
When I wake up, I’m willing to take my chances on
The hope that you, that you hate him
More than you notice I wrote this for you.
You need him, I could be him.
I could be an accident, but I’m still trying,
And that’s more than I can say for him.
Cate had stopped crying, and was looking into Patrick’s emerald green eyes. He hadn’t stopped his singing rhythm, nor had he messed up once on the guitar. Pete kept glancing over at Patrick, then at the bond between Cate in the front row. Somehow, he felt the tiniest bit of jealousy, but he had to get over it. If he truly wanted Cate, he’d have to wait until there was only one guy to fight with, not two, and especially not his best friend. Pete screwed up twice during the easy chorus.
Someday I’ll appreciate in value,
Get off my ass and call you,
But meantime I’ll sport my brand new fashion
Of waking up with pants on at four in the afternoon.
You need him, I could be him.
I could be an accident, but I’m still trying,
And that’s more than I can say for him.
Pete screamed one, two, three, four into the mic. Everyone was still going strong, and Cate, along with Richard, was singing along with Patrick, whose eyes never left Cate’s. Meanwhile, Richard was wondering why his girlfriend wasn’t spending this time with him. He knew that this was her favorite band, and that she had never seen them in concert before, but still, it hurt him that she wasn’t even looking his way.
The last song kept going, and Patrick was finally getting the soulful rhythm. Though, he kept wondering as to why Pete said what he did about the lyrics’ origin. Why did he lie, with Cate standing with her boyfriend in the front row. He was talking to him later. Cate still was looking at Patrick, but Ric had wrapped his arm around her waist, and in a more protective way, almost possessive. It was impossible not to look at him now.
“So what are we doing tonight?” he whispered in her ear. She smiled slightly, a no-teeth and sly smile.
“I think you know what.” And he smiled, kissing her cheek, then the side of her neck. Patrick was almost done with lyrics. He tried to make the last line ring with the emotion he longed to show Cate, in the most passionate way. He smiled thinking about it.
Maybe he won’t find out what I know:
You were the last good thing about
This part of town.
Andy threw his remaining drumsticks into the audience, and quite a few people were almost impaled by them. The others threw the last guitar picks, a bright bit of red in the large black room, as well, and many of them didn’t get past the first ten rows. Richard had gotten one of them with a free hand. Andy left the set, as did Joe. Pete was high-fiving kids he could reach, and Patrick leaned down to Cate when Richard had run away to get a free t-shirt.


“He won’t ever find out. Come to my place when you get the time later on.” Pete watched the ordeal, and noticed Cate’s boyfriend coming up, out of Patrick’s view. Should Pete grab Patrick out of there, or let him take the hit? He went with his good friend instinct. Grabbing him by the arm, Pete half dragged Patrick away, but only because Pete knew that Patrick was wearing his favorite SG model, and didn’t want to risk scratching; he’d never hear the end of it.


Later that night, back at the hotel, Cate was daydreaming about Patrick, while Richard was staring right at her, his dark eyes looking straight into hers. He’d had just about enough of her ignoring him. He snapped his fingers in her face; nothing. He tried clapping; still nothing. There was nothing else for him to do. He slapped her; right across the face.
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