Categories > Books > Harry Potter > MY BUNNY HUTCH

REVENGE

by Alorkin

Harry and Hermione are tired of the carrots trying to snare them, so they get together with some excellent pranksters to deal with the youngest Weasleys. Slightly AU, 6th year (No HBP/DH) ...

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: NC-17 - Genres: Erotica,Parody - Characters: Fred,George,Ginny,Harry,Hermione,Ron - Warnings: [X] [R] - Published: 2009-10-05 - Updated: 2009-10-06 - 4581 words

?Blocked
REVENGE!
Alorkin

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter (et al). That privilege goes to the talented and lovely J. K. Rowling, to whom I am eternally indebted, both for a fascinating read and for many bedtime stories for my daughter.

Disclaimer 2: This story is so NOT HBP compliant! That...book...and it sequel, Deadly Horrible, clearly demonstrate that even talented and lovely authors can make (huge and hideously ugly) mistakes.

A/N: I wish to thank my sister, FireLemming, for her beta work. She doesn't even follow the Harry Potter fandom, preferring TLK, and yet, will take time to offer much needed (and often unappreciated) critical advice. Having an expert on literature, the English language, European mythoglogy and anthropology, leaning over your shoulder making snarky comments about your writing can be a pain, but it does cut down on research time.

****

“Y’know, Harry, those two idiots are really beginning to annoy me.” Hermione growled, referring to Ron’s latest attempt to ‘woo’ her, as she led Harry into the Room of Requirement. Inside, the room had supplied a nicely finished suite with a large bed in the center. He turned, vanished the door, and warded the room against any possible interruption. Turning to Hermione he saw that she’d already got her robes and top off.

“Hey!” He protested. “No fair! You’re supposed to wait!”

“Harry, as long as you take to climax, we’ll barely have time as it is. Now get them off!”

Harry followed suit, and soon the two were naked as the day they were born. He embraced Hermione and together they tumbled to the bed. Kisses, filled with passion, followed until Hermione said: Sixty nine!”

They shifted into one of their favorite positions, and Harry immediately made his acquaintance with Hermione’s already inflamed flower. As soon as the introductions were over, he dove in seemingly trying to trace every ancient rune he knew along her lips and across her clit.

Hermione, no slouch in the oral department either, had already taken Harry’s throbber into her mouth and now bobbed up and down, suckling gently and tracing her own series of arithmantic equations along Harry’s shaft, tormenting her lover as hard as she dared.


Soon, Hermione was crying out in climax, and Harry knew it was time. He had discovered some time before that Hermione sometimes liked it rough. So today, he decided, it was gonna be rough!

Throwing his weight to the right, he flipped them both over, covered her with his body and forced her legs apart with his knees.

“Oh my God, Harry! What’re you doing?” She screeched in shock and not a little fear, for she knew that while Harry was a gentle lover, he could be an animal when the situation called for it. Truth be told, she was shivering in anticipation.

“Be quiet!” Harry growled, sending frissons of…something, through her body. He fitted his aching organ to her opening and shoved hard. Hermione screamed as he sank into her body. Harry bottomed out on his first thrust, then pulled back and thrust again.

‘Oh! Harry! That hurts! Stop, please, Harry! That hurts! Oh, oh, oh god!” While his entrance was painful, Hermione now found herself highly turned on by Harry’s seeming indifference to her pleas, and his absolutely brutal assault, Hermione came again.

Harry plowed on, shifting his position from time to time to give her new sensations.

Hermione screamed again and again as he pounded into her. It still hurt some, but not enough to stop him. Suddenly, Harry disengaged. She wondered what he was doing when he flipped her over and hiked her arse off the bed and stuffed a hard pillow under her hips. ‘Oh no!’ Hermione was in a panic. She’d never tried it this way before. Harry pressed his thumb firmly against her anus, rocking back and forth, and she felt waves of pleasure speed through her body. Still, Harry had promised he wouldn’t try this until she said she was ready! She tried to wriggle away but a sharp slap on her bum put paid to that idea.

“Try that again and I’ll have to…punish you!” He grabbed her hair and pulled back…hard. Hermione arched her back to ease the pressure, and it was with a mixture of anxiety, pain, pleasure and relief that she squealed, as Harry thrust back into her body. The slap of flesh on wet flesh resounded throughout the room. He released her hair, gripped her hips and drove hard and fast, building up his climax quickly. Knowing Harry would never intentionally harm her, Hermione tried to relax into the pounding of his cock in her core, but relaxing was not possible. Hermione screamed in pain mixed with overwhelming pleasure, as Harry did such brutally lovely things to her body. She could feel his finger touch her clit and knew she didn’t have much longer.


She was right. His finger at just the right spot and his heavily veined shaft driving mercilessly into her at just the right angle, sent her screaming over the edge. Harry followed soon after. He spilt into her with a feral growl.



They lay nested together on the bed, sweating and panting, both coming down from their violent climaxes. Hermione nestled into Harry’s shoulder, smiling tiredly as he hugged her closely. “That wasn’t fair, Harry!” She groused.

“Why?” He smirked. “You said I take too long to come. Now we have almost an hour to plot.”

“You’re incorrigible!”

“Naah! I’m Harry! Incorrigible is my evil twin brother. You know him. He’s the bloke that just fucked you to a rosy glow!” Hermione felt a frisson of guilty pleasure, run across her nerves at Harry’s uncharacteristic profanity.

Harry noticed her nipples harden, and smiling warmly, whispered: “Much as I’d like to, luvvie, we need a plan to keep Ron and Gin-Gin off our backs…or in Ginny’s case, off her back.”

“Harry!” Hermione giggled, swatting him.

“Let’s go take a bath. Since I’ve come so hard, it’ll take too long to recharge for another go, anyway. We can plot there.”

“I suppose.” Hermione sighed, gazing in longing at Harry’s temporarily incapacitated cock.

“It’s your own fault, you know. You were too concerned about the time, and so…”

“Shaddap!” She snarled, but grinned at his mock terrified expression.

“You’re so mean to me!” He mock-whinged. Hermione laughed outright at his antics.

“If you’re good, I’ll go down on you again…” He wheedled.

That did the trick. Hermione had taught Harry the basics of oral pleasuring, but he’d proved to be a natural, with a wickedly inventive streak and a dedication to learning, that rivaled her own. What he did with his tongue should be considered illegal in Britain and most of the commonwealth countries. In the Arabic states, it was!

Together they wandered out of the bedchamber and into a newly created bath. Hermione gasped in surprise as the bath took the form of a large, round, cedar tub, filled with jasmine scented water, in the middle of a two-tiered Japanese room. Paper screens framed in wood, formed three sides of the room, and the other was open to a small, walled-in garden. Birds sang in the distance and a soft breeze was blowing the scented air gently.

“Harry!” She squealed. This is lovely!” Wrapping her arms around her lover, Hermione kissed Harry soundly.


They groaned in intense pleasure as they settled into the tub. The bubbling water burst hot, against their bodies. .


“So.” Harry sighed, cuddling Hermione close. The frothing water tingled around them, gently massaging their skin as the heat soaked into their muscles.

“MmmmHmmm!”

“What do we do with Ron and Ginny?”

“Well, it wouldn’t be so bad if I just let him shag me, to get it out of his system.”

“As much as I prefer you didn’t, I can see your point. On the other hand, it might make him think you’ve accepted him, and that will just open another bunch of trouble.”

“Yeah. You’re right.” She sighed. “If I thought it would do any good, I’d try it anyway. You, on the other hand, can’t even give her a ride.”

Harry arched an eyebrow at her. “Well, that sounds awfully one sided!”

Hermione grinned. “Not so fun, now the shoe’s on the other foot, hunh?” Hermione leaned in for another kiss. Harry obliged her so well that she was ready to climb on top of him right there. Unfortunately, they had insufficient time, and regretfully, she broke away and continued her lecture…when she had remembered what she’d been saying, that is.

“What I mean, Harry, is if take Ginny into your bed, you will have made a contract to marry her. All she has to do is tell her mother and the rest is mere procedure. You know how much Molly wants you as a son-in-law.”

“What if she just tells her mother we did anyway? What then?” Harry was suddenly worried, as he wouldn’t put such a thing past the scheming redhead.

“No. The pledge has to be made magically. If she were to make a claim like that, and it wasn’t true, she would likely lose all her magic…maybe even her life.”

“I wonder how many other things the purebloods know that I don’t.” Harry growled. He hated not knowing about the world he’d entered. Using a rather unique system of ‘rewards for good performance’ Hermione had helped him catch up to his year mates, but still, there were many things he should know…as scion of the Potter line, and the head of the Blacks, he had to know!


For the next half-hour, they talked, suggesting ideas and discarding them in rapid succession, until Harry came up with an idea that was so off the wall, it just might work. Hermione was absolutely shocked that her normally shy and unassuming friend could think in such a devious and evil manner. Together, they quickly worked out the major details, and found themselves with time to spare.

“Was I a good girl?” Hermione put on her best ‘little girl’ face.

Harry smirked and said: “The very best. Would you like a reward?”

“Oh yes. Please!” Hermione returned, in the ‘little girl’ voice.

Harry kissed her thoroughly, then lifted her to sit on the shelf edging the cedar tub, knelt between her thighs, and without further ado, applied his tongue to her labia.

****

It was a very happy Hermione Granger, escorted by an equally happy Harry Potter who entered their Transfiguration class. Ron met them at the door to McGonagall’s classroom, glaring at their joined hands. Hermione sighed inwardly. ~It’s your own damn fault, Ron!~ She mentally chided. ~I gave you plenty of hints! You just refused to accept them! Now, it’s too late!~

“Good afternoon, class. Today’s assignment is transfiguration of dissimilar materials combined with pinpoint transfiguration of the resultant material. I would like you to try to transfigure these blocks of wood into glass and from glass, to whatever the final form is. I will award extra points if you can make the glass into something other people would appreciate.”

Harry grinned. He and Hermione had been practicing turning things into usable shields as he’d seen Dumbledore do. Today’s assignment would be no problem. He set to, and within a second, had a golden glass block where the wood had been. Now, rather than using his wand, he carefully moving his fingers here and there, as he began to sculpt the glass. Millimeter by millimeter he gently coaxed the glass to grow, shift and change.

By the time class was over, Harry had created a miniature, highly detailed sculpture of himself and Hermione locked into a lovers embrace, sans clothing. Only then did he notice that he was surrounded by his classmates, wearing expressions that ranged from shock to awe. Hermione smiled proudly beside him, and standing before his desk, Minerva McGonagall was looking rather amazed and very, very much impressed.

“That is absolutely lovely, Mister Potter!” McGonagall breathed softly as the magic dissipated. She carefully picked up the figurine and turned it one way and the other, examining every detail.

“Well, I normally do not do this, but is there anybody here, who feels that this effort does not deserve, let us say, fifty points?” No one objected…but then, the Slytherins had all departed as soon as the bell had rung. Ron had vanished as well.

“Thank you, Professor.” Harry replied, flushing at the praise with a shy grin. Even as far as he’d come he still had a long road before him.

“Not at all, Mister Potter. Your work is beautiful. May I keep this?”

“Sure.” Harry flicked his wand at the sculpture and Minerva saw Harry’s signature appear on the base. She smiled warmly at him.

“Thank you. You might want to consider a career as an artist. You are quite good.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Harry said as he gathered his things. Unfortunately Minerva heard him mutter: “Assuming I survive.” Harry and a worried looking-Hermione left the classroom, leaving Minerva to her thoughts. The statuette in her hands, created with such love, served to remind her that Harry might not, in fact, survive his destined encounter with Voldemort.

****

That evening they set their plan into action, sending a letter to Gred and Forge to meet them at the three Broomsticks that Saturday at two. Harry’s only concern was: “Hermione, if they do this, will they be required to marry? As you know, I’m not all that familiar with pureblood traditions.”

“No, Harry. I understand that in pureblood society, it’s expected for siblings to…erm, ‘experiment’. Fortunately, if they go too far, their magic will…how shall I say it? Erm, ‘fix’ things.”

“So Ginny will become ‘a born again virgin’?”

“Harry!” Hermione giggled. “That’s awful!”

“Yeah, especially if her next lover is as…erm…anxious…as I expect Ron will be.” Harry returned. He lifted her hand and gently kissed her knuckles. “I’m sorry, love. I know I hurt you, when we first…”

“Yes, Harry, you did, but I like to think I got the best part of it. You did everything you could to make it better. And who knows? Maybe a bit of pain will teach her a lesson. If it’s Ron who gives her that pain, then maybe he’ll learn something too. I can’t say I like the idea of her losing her virginity more than once, but I have to think it’s better than what I believe she’s got planned for you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Harry as a pureblood, she will assume direct control over all your assets.”

“But I’m…”

“Your father, Harry. Not you. Legalities aside, you are a halfblood; head of two houses or no, you are still a halfblood. That means she can legally take your assets as her own. Now, if she were the ruthless type, she might wait until you’ve killed off Voldemort and then arrange a suitable ‘accident’ for you.”

Harry blanched. He knew Ginny well enough to know that she could do just that. He’d often commented that she should have been placed into Slytherin house, instead of Gryffindor.

XOXOXOXOXOX

Hogsmead weekend. Rosmerta’s place:

Harry and Hermione sat in the corner of the little pub, sipping their drinks and waiting for their friends to arrive. The weekend had been well planned and Aurors waited at each corner for trouble of any sort. Harry and Hermione as the most accomplished duelists in the school, also patrolled, but just now, they were on a break.

Hey guys!” Harry piped up as Fred and George sauntered into the pub.

“Hello, Harrykins! Hello Hermione. And how are our lovebirds?” Twin one cooed.

“Just ducky, thanks. We need your help.” Harry’s reply was all business. Immediately both twins settled down into ‘serious mode’.

“Whatcha need, Harry?” Twin two asked.

“Well, you know that Ron and Ginny are chasing us.”

“Yesss.” Both chimed, making a terrible hissing noise. Harry winced.

“We want them to stop.” Hermione began. “Unfortunately, since Ginny is convinced Harry is her knight in shining armor, and Ron’s so thick he can’t take a hint that’s not pounded into his head with a bloody mallet, we want your help in ‘dissuading’ them. Now, here’s what we have in mind.”


Four heads bent together, and minutes later, sprang apart. Both twins fell to their knees and began to kowtow, chanting: “We’re not worthy! We’re not worthy!” Several of the patrons of ‘The Three Broomsticks’ chuckled at the foolery. Quickly enough, Gred and Forge, both now in ‘full-pranking mode’ reseated themselves. Fred spoke.

“Hermione, I have to say that is absolutely brilliant. Weird, twisted, evil, demented, downright nasty, fairly disgusting and nicely convoluted, but brilliant!”

“Thanks. It’s nice to be noticed.” Hermione grinned. “But the idea was Harry’s. I simply smoothed it over a bit and filled in some holes. So, do you think it will work?”

“It should. Harry, you’d best stay on this lady’s good side!”

“I intend to. Now, how do we go about doing it?”

“Well, potions are out. They’re too easy to trace.”

“Transfiguration is also kind of iffy, even given your rather impressive skills, Harry. I really don’t think you’re ready to do that to a human being.”

“I agree. We want to teach them a lesson not kill them.” Hermione piped in.

“Hey!” Harry protested. “I’m right here, you know!”

“Hush, Harry.”

“But…”

“Sixty-nine?”

“OK.”

“Care to explain to those of us who don’t understand your code?” Gred asked.

“Do you really want to know?” Hermione arched her eyebrow.

Apparently Gred saw something there that intimidated him, because he stammered: “Ummm…N…No. Not really, no!”

“We’ll just leave it there, then, shall we?” She smirked. Harry sniggered.

Taking the awkward silence for an invitation, Fred began anew.

“OK. That leaves charms. Now, we can suggest three areas of influence. First is a charm that physically changes them…”

“Those are complex and difficult to cast. Not to mention there may be interference.” George added. From there they went into their patented ‘twinspeak’.

“Then there are charms that make them think things have changed.”

“Not so hard to cast. We use a lot of those in our pranks.”

“And last, there are charms that make other people think things have changed.”

“A little harder, given that they have to affect a group rather than a person.”

“We also use those quite a lot.”

“We’d have to recommend you go with option number two.” They finished together.

"All right. We’ll need the area charms to initiate things, and the separate localized charms that make them think what we want."

“We can do those. Just give us your list of requirements and we’ll get the charms ready."

“We’re going to need some help though.” Fred advised.

“What kind of ‘help’?” Harry asked.

“We need someone to run interference…” Began George.

“…while we’re developing the charms,” Fred added, before reverting to their unique pattern of speech.

“…and then at the burrow…”

“…someone needs to cast a compulsion on mum…”

“…to keep Ronnikins busy for most of the day…”

“…until we can get them placed.” Came in stereo.

“…and for some reason, mum doesn’t trust us alone.” George added.

“Though we can’t see why not.” Came from both of them.

“Who do you recommend?” Hermione asked.

“How about Moony and Tonks?” Harry replied.

“Oooh! I like the way you think, Mister Potter!” Hermione chuckled. Gred and Forge just stared in awe.

“So you’ve told me, Miss Granger.”

They left the inn before the twins recovered, and when they did, they turned to each other and said as one: “MOONY!?!”

XOXOXOXOXOX

“Do you two really want to do this? Remus asked. Trying his hardest to remain adult despite the snickers coming from the pink haired twit beside him.

“Not really…shut up Tonks! We just want them to let us alone. We figured that since they can’t take a hint, this’ll have to serve.”

“Well, I can arrange your visit, but if Molly finds out I helped, she’ll skin me alive and then render me for potions ingredients.”

“Hey” Harry shrugged. “What’s the fun without the risk?” Then he realized exactly who he sounded like. His face immediately dropped.

“Oh shit!” Tonks groused, seeing Remus face looking as long as Harry’s. “Snog time!”

Hermione concurred and in short order had Harry seated on the couch and was sitting on his lap, kissing him deeply. Beside her, Tonks was doing the same to Remus. Needless to say, neither man could remain unhappy after that.

The decision amongst the conspirators, after Fred and George got off their knees at Remus’ feet, was the trap would be set on the first day of the winter holidays. Ron wouldn’t expect an ambush then, and Molly wouldn’t expect any skullduggery.


XOXOXOXOXOX

It had been a long day for Ron. As soon as they’d gotten back from meeting the Express, His mum had had him sweep the snow from the porch and restack the wood-rick. Then he’d had to go out to the root cellar and locate some potatoes, onions, peas, carrots and mushrooms for the stew pot. She’d invited Harry and Hermione over for dinner that evening, as they’d both be with Hermione’s parents on the solstice. When he’d finished that, he had to restack the heavy rocks in the wall where he, Fred and George had tumbled them during a wrestling match the week before school began. By the time he was finished, it had gotten dark and he was starved, but nooooooo! She hadn’t even fed him, just demanded he take a shower.

He’d grumbled and groused as he entered his room, stripped and wrapped a towel around himself. Leaving for the bathroom, he’d left the door ajar. That was to be his downfall.


During Ron’s absence, the twins had been busy. They’d gone straight to Ron’s room and began casting.

Following the set up there, they sent Ginny a magical ‘nudge’ hinting that Harry would be there soon and they should ‘talk’. Ginny had entered the room and, immediately feeling randy as could be, stripped off her clothing, lay back on Harry’s cot, and twitched her robes over her body. Harry would ever know what hit him! Her hand began to wander and soon she was breathing heavily as she found that special little nubbin of nerves.


Ron caught himself at the doorway to his room. There, on Harry’s cot, lay Hermione, with an inviting smile on her face. She pulled off her robe to show she was completely naked, then, dropping it to the floor, lay back on his mattress. Ron gaped, dumbfounded, at the naked girl in his bed. His erection snapped up so fast, it was a pure miracle he didn’t pass out. He stepped into his room, absently closing the door behind him. Hermione arched her back, showing her breasts to their fullest advantage. Her bushy brown hair spread across the pillow. She smiled and opened her legs widely. Taking thought for deed, Ron dropped his towel, jumped onto the bed and plowed in, tearing through her virginity in one deep stroke. She screamed in pain.

“What’s wrong? Don’t you like it hard?” He snarled as he made the muggleborne witch, his.

Under him, Ginny was hurting fiercely as his cock had ripped through tender tissues. His comment startled her. “Harry! How could you…?”

“Harry?” He snarled. “I’m Ron!”

“Ron!” Ginny suddenly realized what had happened. “Oh, Goddess! Ron! Gerroff!”

“What? I thought you liked it rough…waitaminute! You’ve been shagging Harry all along, so why did you hurt when I…”

“Because, you idiot, I’m not Hermione! You’re not Harry and we’re both in a huge bit of trouble!”

Ron finally recognized his sister’s voice and yanked himself out of her. “Ginny?” He was horrified.

“Yeah.” Ginny sat up, wincing in pain from his brutal assault.

“What happened? You were Hermione and than you opened your legs and I just…”

“Yeah. You’re gonna have to work on your technique. It was a bit harder than a girl likes.”

Ron suddenly realized they’d been set up. “I guess I looked different too, huh?”

“Ep. You were Harry. I guess they figured out what we were doing and decided to warn us off.”

Molly Weasley chose that minute to enter Ron’s room.

“Congratulations, you two! I just knew you’d discover the truth soon enough. I felt the magic and so, welcome to the family, Har…Ron! Ginny! What on Earth do you think you are doing!?!”

Anger and confusion followed until finally Ginny yelled loudly enough to be heard. “MUM! PLEASE!”

Molly stuttered to a stop. Ginny went on.

“Mum, I think Harry and Hermione figured out what we were doing. How they got past the charms and the potions, I don’t know, but they apparently did. They turned things around on us. We each came in here thinking we were going to be shagging our chosen one, only to find out we were shagging each other!”

“Ginny! Language!” Molly scolded.

“Mum, we set out to take two people who love each other very much, from each other. We were found out. I just lost my virginity…it went to my brother of all people! More, we got caught by our mother immediately after. I think a bit of profanity is called for!”

Molly sagged a bit. She understood her machinations had come for naught. Hopefully Arthur wouldn’t hear of this. He was far too honorable a man to condone such actions, regardless the rewards.

She sighed: “Well dear, you don’t have to worry about your virginity, at least. Your magic will repair the damage to your body.” She paused, then sighed again. “As for the rest. I have to agree. We all tried to force our wills on two of our friends. That was unforgivable.”

“I’m glad you agree.” Harry’s voice entered the room. Molly spun and, tripped over her feet, ending up on her bum. Behind Harry and Hermione, stood Mister Weasley; wearing a look Molly had very rarely seen…disappointment, disgust and pure rage!

“We will be discussing this when I have calmed. Just now, I don’t wish to speak with you.” He growled, turning from his wife of almost thirty years.

“Are you going to leave us alone, now?” Hermione asked.

“Yes, dear.” Molly replied, defeated.

“Good. We’ll want you to sign this, and give us your magical pledge.”

“Whyever for?” Molly protested. “Surely you don’t mean that! I mean, we’ve been friends for years. Surely you don’t need such drastic measures!”

Hermione just gave her a condescending glare.

Thabuthabu that’s all folks!
Sign up to rate and review this story