Categories > Books > Deltora Quest > Pandora's Vest ~(note: this title has no relevancy whatsoever to the actual story)
I'm a big boy now...
2 reviewsLief, Barda and Jasmine realise the necessity of proper bedding and plastic covering. NOTE: TITLE IS MEANT TO SAY PANDORA's CHEST ~ can't change the bloody thing. If anyone knows, please tell me i...
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"What the hell do you mean he lost the belt?" Barda yelled, his face turning an ashen grey. "The thing wasn't some cheap Japanese knock-off from BEST AND LESS, you know."
"It's not his fault! Barda, you know that Lief's night terrors have been wrecking his concentration for the past few weeks now."
"Jasmine, I know better than anybody! Who was it that went and bought Lief that jumbo pack of huggie's pull-ups last monday?" Barda's gaze shifted to the sleeping form on the ground beside him and sighed. "I'm a big boy now... yada yada yada..."
All of a sudden Lief shot up from his plastic covered makeshift mattress, and began to scream with unabashed terror.
Jasmine immediately rushed to his side and began to mutter "poor, poor Lief... This is so sad..."
Barda just shook his head wearily "I'm just thanking the dear sweet Lord that we thought to cover his bedding with plastic."
"hmm... aye." Jasmine tried to remake the bed around Lief, and sniffed with displeasure "This stuff could have killed a small walrus..."
"A small walrus?"
"uh... i mean...by small I meant sm...All walrus. Yep, All Walrus."
Barda remained confuzzled. "How does that rectify the situation, or improve what you said?"
Jasmine then pulled out her semi-automatic. "Shut up and just accept the walrus thing, or I'll show you what I learned in the army."
Barda leapt back in surprise, then stated "When were you ever in the army?"
Jasmine then tucked her semi-auto into her over-sized back pocket "Does it matter? All that matters is getting the belt back."
Barda nodded "And making sure Lief's bladder doesn't have another 'accident'..."
"When did we last see the belt and where?"
"Well I saw this one fellow... very suspicious he was. Kept talking about spinach in cans and olive oil."
"Why is that suspicious?"
"Well who do you know eats canned spinach? Honestly?"
"Popeye."
"THAT'S HIM! To the BAT MOBILE!"
"You mean the Barbie camper-van?"
"...yeh... but that's only until I move out of my mum's house."
"Barda, you're 55."
"SHUT UP, AT LEAST MY MUM LOVES ME!"
"Barda your mum's been dead for 30 years now."
"Then who the hell is living in my house?"
"It's not his fault! Barda, you know that Lief's night terrors have been wrecking his concentration for the past few weeks now."
"Jasmine, I know better than anybody! Who was it that went and bought Lief that jumbo pack of huggie's pull-ups last monday?" Barda's gaze shifted to the sleeping form on the ground beside him and sighed. "I'm a big boy now... yada yada yada..."
All of a sudden Lief shot up from his plastic covered makeshift mattress, and began to scream with unabashed terror.
Jasmine immediately rushed to his side and began to mutter "poor, poor Lief... This is so sad..."
Barda just shook his head wearily "I'm just thanking the dear sweet Lord that we thought to cover his bedding with plastic."
"hmm... aye." Jasmine tried to remake the bed around Lief, and sniffed with displeasure "This stuff could have killed a small walrus..."
"A small walrus?"
"uh... i mean...by small I meant sm...All walrus. Yep, All Walrus."
Barda remained confuzzled. "How does that rectify the situation, or improve what you said?"
Jasmine then pulled out her semi-automatic. "Shut up and just accept the walrus thing, or I'll show you what I learned in the army."
Barda leapt back in surprise, then stated "When were you ever in the army?"
Jasmine then tucked her semi-auto into her over-sized back pocket "Does it matter? All that matters is getting the belt back."
Barda nodded "And making sure Lief's bladder doesn't have another 'accident'..."
"When did we last see the belt and where?"
"Well I saw this one fellow... very suspicious he was. Kept talking about spinach in cans and olive oil."
"Why is that suspicious?"
"Well who do you know eats canned spinach? Honestly?"
"Popeye."
"THAT'S HIM! To the BAT MOBILE!"
"You mean the Barbie camper-van?"
"...yeh... but that's only until I move out of my mum's house."
"Barda, you're 55."
"SHUT UP, AT LEAST MY MUM LOVES ME!"
"Barda your mum's been dead for 30 years now."
"Then who the hell is living in my house?"
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