FicWad

It had to be this way... It was just too hard for me... I took a deep breath and looked up into Gerard's eyes...

"I'm just gonna tell you everything that happened." I said trying not to cry. "So that you'll know and you wont be imagining all this shit that's not really there. And this conversation will be over and we'll never have to have it again okay. " I say and Gerard exhales sharply.

"I thought you meant that-" He sighed pulling me into his arms.

"Meant what?" I say choking a little. He was hugging me so hard I could hardly breathe.

"Never mind." I hear him say taking a deep breath of my hair...Fuck.. He was acting weird... Maybe this isn't the right time...No...better do it now that I'm still a little fucked up...

I made Gerard sit down on the couch and I knelt on the floor in front of him. First I told him everything that I had said to Paul about what happened and then everything that I didn't... Like how it felt when he first hit me... And how I lost count of how many times I passed out... How I woke up feeling him on me and realizing that I was still there... How his words still echo deep in my head no matter how hard I try to forget... But mostly the look that he gave me in the morning and how I just walked out after all of that... I tried not to go on about how karma may have saved me cause I know he doesn't believe in it...

Gerard didn't say anything he just listened and held me. I knew it was killing him too. That was the worst part... But I felt better knowing that Gerard knew it all now and I didn't have to keep bottling it up inside anymore... He had pulled me on top of him on the couch and we laid for a while in silence...

I got up to get my cigarettes. Gerard had leant back on the couch a little when I got up. I open my pack and I only had one left... Fuck... I pull it out and light it. Gerard reaches out his hand for it so I give it to him. I mean I love him... If he wanted the last cigarette he could have it... Fuck I'd give him my last dying breath if I had to... I started pacing the floor in front of him a little.

"Sit down." He says to me.

"No I've got to much energy." I say

"Weren't you getting a cigarette?" He asks noticing I'm just holding the lighter still.

"That was the last one." I shrugged as I dragged the lighter along my outer thigh. The wheels rolled along my jeans and little sparks flew up... The faster I rolled it the more sparks I got.

"Don't play with my lighter Elle." Gerard tells me taking a drag off the cigarette and then holding it out for me...He wanted me to have it... I shake my head no at him.. I gave it to him first; he can't give it back to me...

"Why not?" I say continuing to roll the lighter along my leg. He reached out for it as a spark flew up and landed on the bottom of my sweater... Actually it was Lia's sweater... I didn't really pack that much clothes so I had stolen this from her suitcase... It was nice kinda like a fake cashmere.. I think it was polyester but it had the furry hair like cashmere does and when the spark hit it all the little hairs went up in flames...

I mean they fizzed and sizzled and burnt away so fast that as I screamed and Gerard jumped up and grabbed the sweater pulling it over my head, it was already out.

And of course this has to happen as Lia and Bob are walking back in. "What the fuck are you doing?" Lia says to us... I'm standing in the middle of the room in my bra and jeans and Gerard is stomping on Lia's sweater on the floor.

"Elle lit her sweater on fire." Gerard says trying not to laugh.

"I didn't know you were so kinky Elle!" Bob laughs. Lia frowns.

"No that's MY sweater!" She cries out running over and picking it up off the floor.

"It was an accident." I try to tell her.

"Why don't you just go and put a shirt on okay." Lia snaps at me.

I look down... "Oh okay." I sigh and turn to go into the bedroom. Wait I don't have any shirts.. that's why I borrowed one from Lia. I turn back in the bedroom doorway. Lia is holding her sweater up to the lamp frowning. It had like a thousand little burn holes in it.

"What the fuck were you guys doing?" She says to Gerard. He didn't answer her.

"I think Gerard might have been trying to fuck my wife again." Bob laughs. I roll my eyes... Will this joke never get old with him?

"Motherfucker!" Gerard yells tackling Bob. "I warned you not to marry her last night."

"No you dared me not to." Bob laughed as they started wrestling in the room. They fell over and knocked down the coffee table spilling all the food trays. Here we go again round 5...Lia stepped over them and came towards me in the doorway still shirtless...

"Elle." She says to me like I might not realize that I still have no shirt on.

"uhhh I wanted to know if I can borrow a shirt?" I say weakly. She rolls her eyes at me and shrugs.

She comes into the bedroom and shuts the door behind her as I open her suitcase.

"I went by my dads office." Lia says her voice shaking a little.

"With Bob?" I ask... Like it makes a fucking difference... I know what she's gonna say...

"He wasn't there." She says as I keep my head down shuffling her clothes around in the suitcase. "Did you hear me?" She says louder.

"Yeah." I sigh. "You went to his office."

"Well, just the building actually." Lia sighed. "The guy at the front desk said being the holiday and all he couldn't send me up unless someone answered the phone and no one did." Lia said raising her eyebrow at me.

"Oh" Is all I say back...

"Bob says it means he wasn't there but I don't know Elle... I mean he could've been real busy or maybe he already left it is kinda late now..." Lia said hopefully.

"Did the front desk guy see him at all today." I say carefully.

"He wasn't sure!" Lia groans throwing herself on the bed. I pick out a long sleeved blue top from Lia's suitcase.

"Can I wear this?" I hold it up.

"You can keep it." She smirks. "Once you stretch it all out Ill never be able to wear it again." She laughs as I put it on. I lay next to her on the bed.

"Lia I-" I started to say... I decided that being so honest with Gerard felt sooo good that I was gonna be honest with Lia too about everything and if her dad... fuck... our dad threw her out that she'd just stay with me and that I'd help her through it....

"Elle I want to go home." Lia said cutting me off.

"What?" I say totally shocked.

"I want to go home now-instead of coming with you and Bob to the attorney tomorrow... I just want to go home and see my parents.. you know make sure everything's okay." She says and I reach over and push the hair from her face a little. She smiles at me softly. "I knew you'd understand." She says and leans over and kisses my cheek as she gets up. Then she turns to me as she zippers back up her suitcase. "I mean if something is going on... I want to be there for him, he's my dad." She says nodding at me. "and you know what a bitch my mom can be!"

Is she kidding? Do I understand? Understand her loyalty to her dad? No not really... But it was good that I didn't just tell her anything... I didn't realize that Lia's hatred for her mom would make her take her dads side... She wasn't worried about her parent's marriage... She was worried about her dad... and what her mom would do to him if she found out he was cheating... Fuck...

I gave Lia my keys so she could take my car home from the park and ride station... She couldn't drive Bobs car since it was a stick shift and then shed end up with his car so far from his house and he'd have no way to get it.... Where as she could just park mine at my house and walk home down the block... Knowing Lia though she'll probably park it at her house and make me walk to come get it!

Bob was a little nervous about Lia riding the bus home by herself but she's done it plenty of times and she managed to convince him that she wouldn't talk to any strangers and sit in the first seat closet to the bus driver... I just laughed to myself watching him say goodbye to her... He really liked her...and she seemed to like him too...

The next morning Bob and Gerard and I headed over to Mr. Reefers office. I called up and the secretary said he could see us at 10 am. We were almost late too. I couldn't figure how to set the alarm clock in the hotel room... We all got dressed quickly and raced over there...

I introduced Bob and Gerard to Mr. Reefer and then he brought us into his office where I explained to him what had happened... He wasn't amused.. He wasn't anything actually- he was just a lawyer... And he gave me the dry answer I had expected... We could either file for a quick divorce, which would only take a week to get, but it would follow us around forever, and I mean forever. Or we could apply for an annulment, which takes 4-8 weeks but then the record is gone... erased forever and no one will ever know...

But we can only get one if Bob and I both sign forms saying the marriage was never consummated and submit blood tests or else we have to go and appear in court person to testify why we want the marriage annulled which would take 6-8 months! He said he recommends the short annulment and that he'd only charge us a minimal fee since he knew my papa so well and that he could set us up for the blood work for next week if we wanted... I looked at Bob. He just shrugged and said what ever I wanted was fine. I looked at Mr. Reefer a little unsteadily as I bit my lip. Mr. Reefer told me to think about it and call him and let him know what we were gonna do since he had another appointment coming in shortly...

We were sitting in a small diner a few blocks from Mr. Reefer's office getting something to eat before we headed home. We were talking about what the attorney said... I didn't want Bob to have to be tied to me forever and Gerard didn't seem to understand why I didn't tell Mr. Reefer that we wanted the quick annulment. Gerard was sitting next to me in the booth and Bob was across from us.

"I mean you'll be married to him for 6 fucking more months Elle." Gerard scowled at me as the waitress brought our food.

"I know." I say. God he's told me this like 6 times already! "But Gerard did you hear him say 'blood test'?" I ask looking a the plate in front of me. I don't even know what Gerard ordered for me... Looked like some kind of macaroni.

"Why can't you take a blood test?" Bob says a little nervous as he starts to eat his hamburger.

"Uh cause they stick you with a needle!" I explain to Bob. Gerard nods a little in agreement as he started to eat his burger too... I think he switched to my side now..."What did you order me?" I say to Gerard.

"Its vegetable lasagna Elle." Gerard shrugs.

"Why?" I ask him.

"That's just what its called. I don't fucking know why maybe cause its got vegetables in it" Gerard laughs.

"No I mean why is it on my fucking dish?" I ask. God I get up to go to the bathroom and he fucking orders vegetable lasagna for me?

"The waitress said its good." Bob shrugs. I look over at him and make a face.

"Then why aren't you eating it?" I ask. Bob laughs a little.

"Just eat it Elle... Its good for you." Gerard says kissing my cheek lightly.

"Hey keep your hands off my wife Way." Bob laughs. I roll my eyes. Here we go, were up to round 17 now! He's never gonna stop with this joke... He should have Mikey add it to my headstone... 'here lies Elle Waller, Bobs wife... just let her explain...' And Gerard is no better... Once he realized that I didn't think it was funny, it became like ten times funnier...And now he's encouraging Bob!

"So last night... when I was fucking your wife-" Gerard said loudly and the people at the next table looked over.

"I wont be his wife much longer, so please just stop." I beg them whispering loudly.

"So you're gonna do the blood test?" Gerard asks a little shocked.

"I don't know if I can." I say poking at the lasagna. It looked edible...

"What's the big deal?" Bob laughs a little.

"They take your blood Bob!" I exclaim. "With the needle!" I say getting a little excited. "They poke you with it, in your vein!." I say and Gerard winces a little.

"You're afraid of needles." Bob says smiling at me funny.

"Its called needlephobia." I sigh.

"But you have a tattoo." Bob laughs. My face drops.

"How the fuck does he know that?" Gerard asks glaring at me a little.

"I was just gonna ask you that." I say and we both turn to Bob.

"uh I saw it." Bob says stuffing the burger in his mouth.

"When?" I say.

Bob mumbles with his mouth full. "Uh yesterday when you had your top off."

"Its in between her breasts." Gerard says frowning.

"I guess I have good eyesight." Bob shrugs smiling a little.

"You were looking at her motherfucker." Gerard starts to get loud.

"Well she is my wife." Bob laughs...

Fuck.... Round 18 here we come...