FicWad

"...to go...I don't want you to go...please don't leave me." I sobbed. Breaking down I collapsed against the door. He reached over and pulled me off of it and into his arms as I sobbed.

"I'd never leave you Elle." He said consoling me.

"I just...god.."I sobbed uncontrollably. He pulled me close as I shook a little. 

"Its all right Elle." He whispered as he held me in his arms. I started to calm down. "I'm right here baby, take a deep breath okay."  He says and I nod inhaling deeply, holding it in slightly before exhaling... trying to steady my breathing so I wouldn't hyperventilate and pass out. "That's good." He says softly, I had just about pulled myself together now...I took another deep breath just to make sure...  He was stroking my hair a little. The ends were wet still and kinda tangled. He got his fingers caught in my hair and he started tugging it, trying to free them. He tugged hard too.
 
"Aaah." I cry out in pain as he continued to pull a little, trying to free his fingers from my knotted hair.

"Oh shit." He chuckles a little as he pulled his hand out from my hair.

"Oww." I cry out in pain clutching the back of my head. "That fucking hurt." I whimper.

"Aw baby." He says leaning back a little and bending down to my eye level. He ran his fingers along the bottom of my eyes wiping the tears that were left. "I'm so sorry baby, the last thing I wanna do is hurt you" He said looking into my eyes...trying not to smile. "You all right sugar?" He asks me and I cant help but smile at him. It was kinda funny. He was trying to comfort me and he ends up practically yanking my hair out of my head. I reach up to wrap my arms around his neck but instead I rest them on his shoulders.

"Would you really have left me?" I ask him softly and he gave me a small smile and didn't say anything. "Seriously Gerard." I say looking into his eyes. "If I pushed you out the door... locked you out... would you have left me?" I ask him again.

"I'm not worried about you locking me out Elle." He says brushing the hair from my face. "I have a key." He says smiling at me.

I smiled back. He was teasing me...rrgh... If I didn't fucking love him so much... He leans forward and kisses the tip of my nose.

"But if I made you go." I insist... I don't know why I'm always trying to fucking stir up trouble. Like I don't have enough fucking problems...

"If you made me go? ... Honestly?" He said and I nodded. He paused and thought a moment. "I would've called your husband- had him come over." He says and I laugh.

"What to come over and 'put his foot down?' maybe straighten me out? " I laugh and Gerard smiles.

"No to come over to stay with you." He says and I frown a little. "He would protect you Elle, I'm sure of it." He says and I thought a moment.

"Protect me from what?" I say my voice shaking a little.

"I don't know." He replies and I step back from him and retighten my towel. I was practically dry now... I reached for the door, opening it slightly and Gerard reached over and pushed it shut. "If I'm not around Elle, you go to Bob." He says with a definitive tone to his voice. "Do you understand me?" He says and he stared intensely at me until I nodded in agreement. It made me nervous. He reaches over and goes to open the door and this time I push it back shut.

"What do you mean if you're not around? Where would you be?" I say a little anxiously, leaning against the door, blocking it as he went to open it again.

"I mean if you ever..." He sighed a little. "You just go to Bob okay... He'll take care of you." He says and I frown.

"I don't want Bob I want you." I tell him and he sighs again.

"You trust me Elle?" He says.

"Of course." I say with out hesitation.

"I trust Bob." He tells me. "I trust him with you. He'll take care of you. You understand?" He asks me and I nod even though I didn't understand. What the hell is he talking about? "If you cant find Bob you go to Ray and then Mikey." He tells me and I look at him blankly.

"What about Frankie?" I ask and he smiles.

"Elle as a last fucking resort go to Frankie!" He laughs.

"You don't trust Frankie?" I say poking him a little. He chuckled and grabbed my hand, pulling it up to his mouth and kissing it lightly.

"You know I fucking had a hamster growing up." He tells me, seemingly coming out of nowhere. "Well me and Mikey did, aah way back in grade school..." He tells me and I lean back against the door and watch his eyes light up a little as he remembered. "It was a little brown teddy bear hamster. Mikey use to call him Fred." He says and I smile.

"Fred?" I repeat.

"His name was Thor." Gerard says getting a little defensive. Definitely some kinda unresolved issue there...

"Sorry." I say and he smiles at me shaking his head a little. "So what happened to /Thor/?" I ask and he scoffs a little.

"Fucking Frankie Iero. That's what's happened to him." He says getting a little worked up.

"Well what happened?" I say getting really interested.

"He got one of those matchbox car hot wheel set things with the loops for Christmas, you know what I'm talking about." He say and I nod. "Well he convinces Mikey to let him fucking strap Thor to one of the cars... and he.." He stopped talking and pressed his lips together tightly.

"Oh no Gerard he didn't..." I say covering my mouth a little so he couldn't see me trying not to laugh.

"Oh he did... and it was going real well until the second loop de loop when the car came off the track and went flying across the table and on to the floor."  He explains frowning a little.

"Oh my god!" I exclaimed as he shook his head thinking back.

"Fucking crashed to the floor splattering Thor's brains on my moms rug." He says and I cringe a little.

"Gerard that's horrible!" I say a little appalled by his description of what happened.

"I loved that motherfucking hamster." He says and I shake my head a little not sure of what to say, I look down at my bare feet. "But not as much as I love you." He says lifting my chin up and smiling at me pulling me back into his arms.

"That's why Frankie is your last resort." He tells me.

"Cause you're worried that Frankie would strap me to a toy car and knock me off the edge of a desk?" I tease him.

"Aw come on Elle." He groans.

"I'm just teasing you." I say reaching for the door. We were still in the bathroom. I was still naked wrapped in a towel.

We were talking for so long my hair was dry. I was dry. And honestly a little cold. I went to open the door and he pushed it back shut.

"Where do you think you're going?" He says seductively.

"I'm gonna go get dressed." I tell him and he shakes his head no.

"I shared something with you Elle." He says.

"It was a great story too." I say and I nod and reach for the door again. He pulls it back shut.
 
"Well I think you should share something with me." He tells me and I smile.

"Something like what?" I ask and he grins a little.

"Maybe something under your towel?" He says reaching for it. I laugh and reach for the door again. He pushes it shut and grabs me by the waist and tries to slip his hands up under the towel. I wiggled away and grabbed the doorknob again. He forced it shut and pulled me back close to him, reaching up and tickling me. I tried to squirm away but he pulled me closer. I still had one hand on the knob. He was trying to tickle me so I'd let it go and he could shut the door.

"Stop you're gonna break it again." I whine and he suddenly lets me go.

He steps towards the door and runs his fingers along the door jam. I guess he was checking that it didn't break again. I don't even know how he fixed it the first time. I thought it was hopeless...

"Its not broken?." He says more like a question then a statement. I leant over and looked at it too.

"No its not." I say and he looks up at me with a strange expression.

"How did you do that?" He says and I laugh a little.

"do what?" I say a little perplexed.

"Fix this!" He snaps at me a little.

"I didn't fix that...you did." I tell him and he just looks at me. "You did fix that Gerard didn't you?" I ask him and he looked a little pale. "You fucking went to the hardware store...didn't you fucking fix it.!" I say as he inspects the doorknob again. It was a new doorknob. He had to have bought it....

"I didn't..." He started to say and I collapsed against the sink.

"I mean I  was going to but Will said I needed to know-" He starts to say.

"Will?" I cut him off. He nods.

"Yeah he works at home depot now." Gerard tells me. "I told him how-"

"Wait Will, my Will?" I ask and he cringes a little. Kinda like I did when he said that about Jessica. "Will Cutter?" I ask and he nods again. That was the guy I was with before Paul... "You told him what now?" I say getting a little upset. Gerard just stared at me blankly. "Don't tell me you told him..." I say shaking my head a little.

"He was the one who said to put the yellow paint Elle." He tells me.

"And a lot of good it fucking did." I mumble under my breath. Un fucking believable. He wont include me but he fucking includes Will? I guess to be included you needed to have a dick...

 Gerard was looking at the doorknob again. "Well how did this happen Gerard?" I ask and he just shook his head. "Well when did this happen Gerard?" I ask and he sighed a little.

"I'm trying to figure that out." He said getting a little frustrated.

"Well how bout you think out loud...include me ya know." I snap at him. He paused and looked at me. "Unless Lia was right. I shouldn't have told you." I say and he scoffs a little. "I mean if you're gonna keep things then so should I." I say sniffling a little.

"Okay . okay. okay."  He tells me sighing a little. "We came after school. I wanted to check and make sure everything was okay." He says and I nod. "And it was... so we went to Home Depot and I fucking bought the locks and I was gonna get the bathroom lock too but I didn't know which kind of latch you had and Will said it wouldn't fit if I bought the wrong one and then he said about painting the door jams and windowsills and we came back and Frankie painted and Ray and I changed the front door lock." He explains to me.

"And the bathroom." I say and he just looked at me. "Was it like this when you got back from the store?" I say and he shrugs.

"I didn't look...I don't know." He says and I frown. "I'm gonna go check the windows." He tells me and I grab his arm.

"I'm gonna come too." I say and he shakes his head no at me.

"Go get dressed Elle." He tells me.

"But I want to come see." I whine.

"There's nothing to see." He tells me pushing me out into the hall. He grabbed my arm and pulled me towards my room. "I'll let you know if there's something to see." He says and I pout. "Come on its getting dark Elle." He tells me pushing me into my room.

"So." I reply.

"I'm just wanna go outside and take a look around before it gets too dark out." He says and I open my eyes wide. Too dark out? It was already dark out! It wasn't gonna get any darker..was it?  "Just stay here. I'll be right back okay." He tells me and kisses my cheek.

"Gerard." I call out and I reach up and stop him from shutting the door.

"Baby please, trust me...I'll be right back." He says and I pout a little. He goes to shut the door.

"Leave it open." I say and he nods a little and walks back down the hall. I stood there listening. I could hear him unlock the door, open it and then close it. He jiggled the handle from outside to make sure it was shut all the way and I smiled a little. I stood silently and listened. I heard him faintly go down the steps. I heard some leaves rustling and then nothing... It was silent. I stood there straining to hear, but nothing... fuck...

I hung my towel on the closet door and opened my bottom drawer. I pulled out a pair of pink panties and slipped them on. I had a matching camisole too. I pulled it on and smiled to myself. Lia bought me this set. Across the back of the panties were big white letters that said 'bitch'. She was always buying me crap like that. I never thought anything of it... but now... fuck...

I sat on the bed and pulled out the body lotion from my drawer and started to put in on... I had finished and he still wasn't back...

Why wasn't he back?  I was getting nervous... I mean what's taking him so long? I went over to my window and looked outside. It was dark... I hate the dark. And since I had the light on in my room all I could see was my own reflection in the window.

I lifted the window open slightly. It was unlocked. The windowsill was painted yellow, thanks to Frankie. But the fuck good is it if the window is unlocked? Motherfucker. Now I see what he means about trusting Frankie...

I peeked my head outside into the darkness...

"Gerard?" I called out into the darkness..

There was no answer...