FicWad

I just stared at him. How could he do this to me? Asking me to marry him... here!... now!...fuck.

He must've seen the look in my eyes cause his face dropped a little. He lowered the ring slightly but didn't say anything...

"Gerard I can't." I say and he stared blankly at me.

"Your answers no?" He says lowering his voice down so low it was barely a whisper.

"Yeah my answer's no, you know I can't, I'm still legally married to Bob." I say and he smirks a little.

"Elle." He says sitting up on his knees across from me. "Forget about Bob...forget about all that legal bullshit okay?" He says and I just look at him.. "It's just you and me...we're here all alone and all I'm asking for is..." His voice trails off slightly, and he sighs a little holding the ring up to my face again. "Marry me Elle." He repeats a little firmer, taking my left hand off my lap and holding it up. He slides the ring down on to my finger before I could say anything... It fit...It fit perfectly on my finger...just like he fits perfectly in my heart. He rubbed his thumb along it a little and I clenched my hand around his. He looked up at me waiting on my answer once again...

"Yes." I exclaim loudly looking down at the ring on my finger, at my hand on top of his..."Oh fuck yes." I say I looking up into his eyes and he smiled. "I want nothing more than to be with you Gerard." I tell him and he suddenly leaps towards me; his lips crashing against mine, toppling me backwards on to the blanket.

The kiss was so passionate, I felt his love for me so deep and so committed that it felt like he sucked my soul right out of my body and filled me with his...I had never felt so close to him as I did in that moment...

The whole drive home he didn't say anything. Neither did I. He just looked over and smiled at me and I would look back and smile at him and then he'd turn his eyes back to the road until he'd get a glimpse of me looking over at him and smiling and then we do it all over again...

This went on the whole way home. Neither one of us speaking... It wasn't until we were coming down my block and I saw some cars parked in front of my house that I broke the silence.

"Who's at my house?" I ask straining to make out the cars from a distance.

"Better be Bob." He says and I look at him at a complete loss.

"Why?" I ask.

"I called him from Macys told him what happened. Asked him to change the locks again." Gerard says lowering his voice a little.

"But I don't need new locks now." I start to argue and he just looked at me like don't start, so I shut up.

He pulls into the driveway and I can see Bob kinda sitting on the front steps waiting. Gerard gets out and starts walking over. I'm still trying to gather all my crap up. I glance over. Bob was kinda hugging Gerard, patting him on the back. He was saying something but I couldn't make out what it was.

I grabbed all the bags from the car and was yawning a little as I shut the door and walked towards them. Bob came over and grabbed me up into his arms hugging me. He actually lifted me up off the floor.

"I'm so glad you're okay honey." He says squeezing me tightly to him. I groan a little as he squeezes the life out of me.

"Rrgh Bob put me down." I say and he chuckles a little and leans over and kisses my cheek quickly before putting me back down on the floor.

"Elle give me those bags." Gerard says reaching for them.

I shake my head no and pull them back slightly. "No I've got them." I tell him. "Just go open the door."

"Oh yeah here." Bob says reaching into his pocket and pulling out a key ring and tossing it to Gerard.

"Hey those are mine!" I tease and Bob smiles and pulls another one out of his pocket and holds it up.

"Oh don't worry I got more." He laughs.

"Well now how many copies did you make Bob?" I say and he smiles.

"Four" He says plainly and my jaw drops a little. "Me, you, Gerard, Ray ... and Lia." He says.

"Lia!" I say loudly and he shrugs.

"I had no choice Elle." He mumbles.

"Elle!" Lia screams from the doorway. "Fuck Bob why didn't you tell me they were back." She yells pushing past him, wrapping her arms around me and squeezing me almost as tightly as Bob did causing me to drop all my bags onto the floor... "Aw sweetie." She sniffled a little in my ear.

"It's all right Li- we're okay." I say and she pulls back a little and shakes her head a little.

"I told you so." She says and I just look at her.

"Lia please." I say sighing a little. I knew where she was going with this.

"Told her what?" Bob says raising his voice slightly.

"That Will was crazy." She says and both Gerard and Bob look at me in disbelief.

"Fuck Lia you said that like 3 years ago." I say swatting her arm a little.

"And it was true... I never liked him.." She says and Gerard rolls his eyes a little. "I'm telling you Elle, those nuns over at St Marys..." She says shaking her head a little. Lia hates nuns... Something about them freaks her out. "And I'll tell you another thing Ray better watch out for that Laura, she came from there too right?" She says and I can't help but smile.

"Lia, Laura is a really nice girl." I say and she shrugs.

"Yeah well we'll just see about that." She mumbles.

"Are you guys coming in?" I hear Crystal say. I look up and she's in the doorway.

"Oh hey." I say. I didn't realize she was here.

"Hi Elle." She says politely.

"Yeah come on." Lia says grabbing my hand in hers. She must've felt the ring cause she twists my arm up suddenly holing my hand up in the air. "What the hell is this!" She yells.

"Ow...ow... ow." I say trying to wriggle my hand away. She was twisting my arm, twisting my stitches. "Lia stop you're gonna fucking." I stepped back a little trying to untwist myself in her grip.

"Did you ask her to marry you?!" Lia kinda yells over at Gerard a little irritated.

"Yeah." He says boldly.

"Aw how romantic." Crystal sighs.

"Ha! Gerard-romantic!" Bob laughs a little.

"It was romantic as hell man." Gerard says punching Bob in the stomach a little.

"Well when did this happen Elle?" Lia questions me. She was all flustered.

"At the graveyard." I reply.

"Yeah sounds real romantic." Bob laughs again and Gerard punches him again, but this time Bob punched him back. I rolled my eyes a little and looked back over at Lia. She was frowning at me.

"What?" I demand.

"And you said yes?" she asks me biting her lip a little. Bob stepped back from Gerard a little and looked over at me. Crystal was looking at me too.

"Actually I said no." I say lowering my voice down. Crystal looked confused. Bob smiled, I think... I don't know cause Lia started twisting my arm again.

"Then what the hell is this?" She was yelling waving my hand in the air.

"Fuck Lia your gonna kill me." I say yanking my arm back from her. She was still frowning. "I said no at first cause you know I'm still married to Bob." I say and she just looked at me. "But as soon as we get that annulment I can marry Gerard." I say looking over at him smiling.

"So you said yes?" Lia says looking at me wild-eyed.

"Actually she said 'oh fuck yes.' " Gerard laughs a little and I smile as he pulled me into his arms and kissed my nose.
Lia groaned a little. "So what?- once you get your annulment you're just gonna go run off and get married in the street again?" She snaps. I just look at her.

"No I'm going to marry Gerard for real." I say looking over at her a little confused. "Once the annulment goes through." I add and she frowns.

"Yeah what the hell is taking so long with that anyway babe?" Gerard says and I shrug.

"Oh ummm. Yeah see that guy called the other day when I was here." Lia says and I raise my eyebrows at her.

"Mr. Reefer?" I say and she nods a little. "The attorney?" I say and she nods again.

"Yeah uh.. he said that umm you need to take the blood test by the 13th or else ummm..." She pauses like she's trying to remember.

"The 13th!" I yell. "Lia today is the 15th!" I tell her and she shrugs. "Well, or else what?" I say and she just looked at me. "Or else what?" I say shaking her a little.

"Or else you'd have to wait for a court date." She says plainly.

"Well did he say how long?" I ask and she shrugs.

"Like a couple months Elle." She says and I sigh in desperation. "Its not a big deal Elle, really." She says and I give her a hard look.

"It is." I say annoyed.

"I don't even know what the hell you think you're doing anyway Elle." She says nastily. "Both of you." She says waving her hand over at Gerard. "I mean you still gotta finish school you know." She says and I look over at Gerard.

"We are going to finish school Lia." He tells her roughly.

"And then what?" She snaps at him. "You gonna move in here and play house." She laughs mockingly. "You don't have a job Gerard." She tells him. "You don't have shit. What are you gonna do for her?" She says and Crystal steps out of the doorway.

"Lia, that's enough okay..." She reprimands her a little.

"No I'm just telling the truth." Lia says shaking her head a little.  "You don't know her like I do." She tells Crystal pointing over at me. "She never takes anything seriously." She says talking about me like I'm not even there. "She doesn't think things through, she just acts." She says and I frown.

"I do too." I interrupt. She turns and looks at me.

"No you don't." She tells me harshly. "You never think of the future... of the consequences." She says and I look down at the ring on my finger... the scar on my hand... remembering how impulsive I was that day in picking up the razor... not knowing for sure...but acting anyway...

"Lia shut the fuck up." Gerard tells her pulling me back against him a little.

"No, no I wont. I can't just sit here and watch her throw her life away." Lia says tossing her hands up in the air.

"Lia!" Crystal gasps a little. Gerard went to say something to her but I pulled his arms around me and shook my head no at him. I so did not want to have world war three on my front porch right now...

"You know its true, right Bob?" Lia says looking over at him. He just stood there with his mouth open a little. "Tell them Bob. Tell them you think it's a bad idea." She says and he shifted his weight a little. "You seriously don't want her to marry him do you?" She laughs a little.

"If it makes her happy." He says softly. "I mean if its makes them happy." He says louder. "If its what they both want then yeah." He says shrugging a little.

"Oh you guys are all fucking nuts!" Lia exclaims tossing her hands in the air. "You think this is all fun and games Elle." She yells at me. "What's gonna happen when you wake up five fucking years from now with three kids and realize you gave up everything for him!" She starts.

"Gave up what Lia?" I say sighing a little.

"Aren't you going to college Elle?" She demands and I shrug.

"I haven't really thought that far ahead." I say and she laughs.

"That's right!" She scoffs at me. "You don't think that far ahead, that's your fucking problem." She says waving her hands around again. She was freaking out.

"Lia please." I sigh a little.

"No Elle. I cant... I cant let you do this." She says shaking her head at me.

"You don't get a choice Lia." I tell her laughing a little in frustration. "I love him and I'm going to marry him." I tell her and she frowns.

"I know you love him. But you think he really loves you." She mocks me.

"Lia what the fuck is your problem-" Gerard starts to yell and I hush him.

"Are you kidding me?!" She yells stepping towards him.

"Yes Lia! He loves me back I know he does." I say loudly stepping in between them.

"Why cause he told you so?" She laughs sarcastically. "Cause you know he told me the same thing." She says and I look back over at him. He looks down.

"I said I was sorry Lia." He says lowering his voice a little. "Just let it fucking go already." He mumbles. She was talking about that night on Halloween. I looked at him, he wouldn't look up at me. I looked over at her. She was glaring at him. I look at Bob. He gave me a real apologetic look.

"He never told you what happened did he?" Lia says smirking a little.

"Nothing fucking happened Lia." He snaps at her.

She chuckles. "You looked right into my eyes and you lied to me." She says and he exhales a little and bites his lip.

"Tell me Elle." She says turning to me. "Did he look deep into your eyes, take your hand in his and swear he was telling the truth...that he needs you.... that he fucking wants you..." She says lowering her voice down..."Cause that's what he told me- and then poof!" She snaps her fingers. "He takes it all back." She declares.

"Lia." I sigh frustratedly. Fuck. She is never gonna let that go...

"Aw fuck you Lia." He snaps at her. "How many times can I tell you I'm sorry huh?" He yells at her and she shrugs.

"Don't let him do the same thing to you Elle... I don't wanna wake up five years from now and be standing here telling you I told you so all over again." She says and I frown.

"Lia I really don't want to argue with you right now." I say rubbing my eyes a little. She was giving me a headache...

"Lia why don't you just fucking go home." Gerard tells her and she smirks defiantly crossing her arms on her chest.

"Lia come on lets just go" Crystal says and Lia shakes her head no. "Seriously Li -we gotta go." Crystal says and Lia frowns. "Fuck Lia you're gonna make me late for work again!" Crystal says and Lia makes a face but reluctantly agrees to leave. She reaches over and hugs me again before going.

"Just promise me you'll think about what I said Elle, I'll call you later." Lia tells me as Crystal takes her hand and pulls her back from me. I just looked at her.

"Bye Lia." I say and Gerard smirks at her a little. Lia kinda gave him a nasty look but didn't say anything...

"Well uh see you guys later." Crystal says tugging Lia a little down the steps. Bob kinda waved.

Gerard mumbled something like she was a crazy bitch as he held the door open and motioned for me to go in. I looked over at Bob. He sighed a little and took the bags I left on the porch and carried them in. I followed him and Gerard came in behind us and shut the door.

"I'm gonna go take a shower." I say glancing up at the clock. It was almost 5. I told Pete I'd meet him at six even though the dance didn't start till 7. Gerard nodded and he and Bob went into the kitchen I guess...

I took a long hot shower...washing away all the dirt and grime and of today's events... I couldn't get the touch of Wills hand off me. No matter how hard I scrubbed. I couldn't get the taste of his kiss out of my mouth either... Fuck.. I gotta pull it together... I can't show up at Pete's house like this...

I was standing in the bathroom blow drying my hair, wrapped only in a towel... I forgot to bring clothes again... Shit... I cant do anything right... Lias right... I don't plan ahead...

I knew I was coming in to the bathroom. I knew I was gonna take a shower. Usually I'd just walk back to my room naked, but Bobs here. And I'm sure the last thing he wants to see is me parading naked around the house...

Shit I am a fuck up... Gerard cant see it cause he's blinded by love... But its true...My eyes started tearing up a little. I turned the blow dryer to my face stupidly thinking I could dry them... that was the worst idea I ever had. The fucking heat and wind from the dryer burned my eyes. I mean it dried the tears, but it also fucking dried my eyes out so fast and burned so badly that my eyes instantly welled up with twice as many tears.

The burning startled me and I lost my balance and kinda toppled back crashing into the door. I flicked the dryer off and tossed it on the counter and squeezed my eyes shut rubbing them. "Aw fuck..." I moaned in pain.

There was a knock on the door. I wiped my eyes a little and glanced at my reflection. My eyes were bloodshot now. Fuck... I open the door. It was Gerard.

"You all right baby, it sounded like you fell." He says looking me over a little concerned.

"Yeah I kinda lost my balance." I say and he frowns looking at my red eyes.

"Were you crying?" He asks. I shake my head a little.

"I was just thinking." I tell him.

"About what Lia said?" He asks lowering his voice. My eyes locked with his. How the fuck did he know what I was thinking about? Was I thinking out loud again? I just looked at him like a deer caught in the headlights..

"How?" I ask asked a little bewildered.

"Cause I wanna explain-" He started and I shook my head a little. I can't do this...not now...

"Gerard no." I shush him. "Don't explain...just- here." I say taking the ring off my finger and holding it out for him.

"What are you doing?" He asks totally taken aback. 

"Well, what does it look like I'm doing...." I say and he just looked at me...

"Well, it looks like you're giving me my ring back...." He says and I nod.

"Well, that's cause I am..."