FicWad

“I know you don't smoke but umm do you have any cigarettes?” I asked him instead and he nodded as he dug through the bag. He pulled out a pack and handed it to me and I looked at them anxiously. It was the exact brand I smoked.

“They're yours.” He says and I looked at him funny for a second. They were mine? what the fuck did that mean? These weren’t mine. My cigarettes were in my purse in Bobby’s trunk. So there’s no way that these are mine. Unless he took these from the hotel room too? I tried to think back if I had any extra packs of cigarettes in the room but I don't think I did.

“No they're not mine.” I tell him and he sorta smiled as I tried to give them back to him but he wouldn’t take them.

“No I mean they're yours now. I got them for you.” He says and I tossed them down onto the seat next to me.

“Oh I thought you meant you like took them from me.” I tell him and he frowned a little.

“Elle, I’d never steal from you.” He says his voice changing once more and I wondered who I was talking to now… Wasn’t soft spoken Will, and it wasn’t angry gun waving Will either…

Sounded more like preachy church ‘the devil is evil and must be cast out from you’ exorcism Will. Like when he yelled about how wrong it was for Lia to be gay or bi sexual or whatever the fuck she was calling herself now… Fuck… I gotta remember to call Lia when I get out of here… Will was now rattling off some scripture verses about stealing being a sin and he seemed to be spacing out a little as he spoke.

“Well umm, I just said it cause you’ve stolen from me before.” I blurt out interrupting him without really thinking it might upset him and he frowned once more at me. “No, you did! You took my underwear before. I found them in your room so don't even try to deny it.” I tell him and he shook his head a little.

“That wasn’t me.” He says and I turned to the window so he wouldn’t see me rolling my eyes at him. What a fucking excuse! -It wasn’t me! Ha! How convenient that must be to have multiple personalities. I bet he uses that excuse all the time…. wasn’t me…

“Whatever Will.” I tell him and he sighed a little.

“I mean it was me but it wasn’t.” He says shaking his head and I felt bad for thinking that crap about him before.

“Its all right Will.” I tell him softly and I don't know if he heard me or not cause he shifted moods on me once again.

“And that was a long time ago.” He says defensively and I smirked unintentionally. “What?” He demanded and my face fell. Shit… He was getting pissed… He wanted an answer and I wasn’t about to lie. I suck at lying… And if I lie to him and he catches me in it, that might piss him off even more…

“Look I know you were in my room this morning.” I tell him lowering my voice down and he frowned. “I know you were in my drawer again.” I add and he shook his head a little.

“I wasn’t.” He says and I almost rolled my eyes again but I stopped myself.

“I know Will, it wasn’t ‘you’. It’s okay. I understand.” I tell him trying not to sound patronizing but it was hard…

“No Elle, I mean it wasn’t me.” He says and I wrinkled my face a little. “I just fucking drove fuck knows how many hours to get here and I pull up and you're standing outside waiting for me… It was fate.” He added but I didn’t answer him…It wasn’t him? …He wasn’t in my room? What the fuck?

Then who was in my drawer? It couldn’t have been Bobby could it? Will was saying something else but I wasn’t really listening to him. Something about me going to his house and how it shows I care for him but I don't know…

“I only went there to get the shit you stole from me.” I tell him and he arched his eyebrow up at the word ‘stole’… “I mean took- whatever.” I tell him and he looked at me like he didn’t know what I meant. “My box, from the mail.” I try to clarify and he nodded.

“Oh that.” He says like it was no big deal.

“Yeah that.” I tell him crossing my arms on my chest and he sorta grinned looking over at me.

“Ugliest fucking bear I ever did see.” He says and I took that as a personal attack.

“And who are you fucking God now?” I snap at him without thinking and as I soon as I said it I regretted it.

I could just see Gerard shaking his head at me in my mind. Fucking taunt the mad man with religious shit. Good going Elle… Fuck. Maybe I can still fix it…

“I'm saying like who are you to decide what's cute and what's not?” I asked him and he still didn’t speak so I continued to carry on. “–whatever happened to ‘judge not lest thee be judged yourself? Hmmm? Isn’t that in your bible?” I tell him and he just looked at me as I carried on, still not saying anything back, which just pissed me off even more. I finally gave up my efforts of trying to speak to him. He wasn’t gonna answer me so I don't know why I was even bothering…“I need some fucking air.” I tell him as I roughly opened my door and got out.

I should've fucking ran. I mean I could’ve…I should've…I don't think he would’ve stopped me, but I don't know… We were the only car in the parking lot. I mean it was winter. No one comes to the park in the fucking winter. It was a small park too. Had a little playground area with some swings that kinda backed up to the elementary school. And a couple of picnic tables were across from that and then further behind were some woods. There were some trails going through it, came out on the other side of the road near the 7-11.

I mean I had been here so many times before. It was a shitty excuse for a park. The only people that came here were the stoners, fucking around in the woods… So maybe there were people around… hmm… But they’d probably be too fucked up to help me. But then again did I really need help? I mean Will wasn’t gonna hurt me. He was suffering and he needed me. If I went running off from him who knows what the fuck he would do. He was obviously looking for help and I don't know why he thought I was the one who that was gonna give it to him, but he did…

It was starting to get late. The sun was beginning to light up the sky in orange and red; I figured it’d be dark in maybe a half-hour or so… I didn’t even hear Will get out of the car cause he moves so fucking quietly sometimes, like a damn cat. He fucking startled me too, reached over and touched my arm and I jumped a little.

“Here.” He says extending his hand out to me. “This is yours too.” He says forcing it into my hand and I looked down at it a little confused.

It was a key.

But not just any key… It was a safety deposit box key. It was marked strangely though #0000. Didn’t say which bank but I knew it was the one where my Papa use to work. I mean my grandfather didn’t actually work in the bank; he worked in the offices upstairs... But on the ground floor there was a bank branch and they had safe deposit boxes.

I know this cause he had one, my grandfather… I remember that I had went to empty it after he died that’s why I recognized the key right away. I remembered hoping that there was something in it, some kinda answers, but there wasn’t any.

My grandfather didn’t have anything in his box really. Nothing valuable at least unless you counted birth certificates and crap like that as important… Good thing I left them in there too or they would’ve been destroyed in the fire.

But this is what Sammy had sent me? In the box with Bow-Bow? A key? A key to a fucking safe deposit box… I gripped it tightly in my hand as my mind ran wild. Fuck I wonder what's in it? I bet whatever’s inside is what Sinatra’s after… Maybe even Chris Hunter too and Mr Sameul? Fuck… I had never felt so freaking close to getting some kinda answers before. It was exciting but at the same time terrifying. I couldn’t wait to fucking tell Gerard. But as soon as I thought his name my mood plummeted.

‘Oh Gerard.’ I sighed to myself. Where was he? What the fuck? I mean I know Will probably wouldn’t have given me the key if he was here. So it was kinda good that it worked out this way, but still… I needed him…

He said he’d always be there when I needed him and yet again he's no where to be found… He wasn’t there the morning after Brutus’ apartment –Paul was. And he wasn’t there that night of the dance when I needed him and he was off saving Jessica –Bob was…

Fuck… Bob….

What am I gonna do about him? I mean there’s no way he took my underwear. I mean he wouldn’t… he couldn’t…. But there was no other explanation…

The whole time I was thinking Will just stood next to me in silence. I think he was watching the sun set. It was actually quite beautiful. It was one of my favorite things to do. Seemed like a waste of such a beautiful moment though, it being me and him watching it…

“Well, that’s it.” He says when the sun was no longer visible and I frowned at his words. He made it sound so final. Like it was the last sunset ever.

“Mmm until tomorrow.” I added to his sentence and he didn’t acknowledge it. Just shifted his eyes slightly back to the car.

Made me wonder if we were gonna leave. Well if he was gonna leave… I wasn’t about to get back in the car with him

“Mmm, so was there anything else in the box Will?” I asked him but he just looked past me a little as I slipped the key into my pocket. I was so worried I was gonna lose it, but my jeans were pretty tight so it wasn’t gonna fall out or nothing.

“Ugly ass teddy bear.” He replied and I bit my lip a little.

“Keep talking shit about my teddy and I'm gonna knock you on your ass. Teddys a stud.” I tell him waving my finger in his face and as I said it I smiled. Shit I’ve been hanging out with Bobby too long… Will kinda smiled back at me too.

“Shit he’s Teddy? Teddy the bear” He says like it was funny but it wasn’t. “That’s fucked up.“ He snickered. Oh man he was fucking nuts. And he was obviously a lousy stalker. I mean teddy was a large brown bear and bow-bow was … well he was a large brown bear too, but he had a bow tie! You could easily tell them apart in a line up.

“No his name is bow-bow.” I tell him and he smirked a little. “Bow-bow the great, but I never call him that, it’s usually just ‘bow-bow’.” I sorta explained to him but he didn’t seem to be listening once more… “My mom gave him to me.” I sighed softly and that seemed to catch his attention.

“Your mom died of cancer.” He says like it was a fact he read somewhere.

“Uh yeah she did.” I replied and he nodded.

“My aunt died of cancer.” He says and I nodded. I mean what the fuck? Cause we both knew someone who died from cancer – that what? Was that like a sign we were soul mates? “Your mom had lung cancer though.” He says and I looked at him funny.

“How did you know that?” I asked him curiously. I mean not many people knew that.

“I know everything about you Elle.” He replied and I should've just kept my mouth shut by my curiosity took over.

“How?” I asked and he got that glazed look in his eye once more. “Why?” I asked and he shrugged.

“You were the first girl we ever-“ He shrugged a little…great… he was referring to himself in the plural tense again. “Actually you’re the only...” He says and I took a deep breath. Shit. If had known sleeping with him all those years ago would’ve brought me all this trouble I would’ve never done it…

“Uh, you know I'm married now?” I throw out there hoping that that might squash whatever fantasy’s he was thinking may be our future.

“Yeah I know but you weren’t married in a church.” He says like that made a difference.

“So?” I challenged him and he frowned.

“And you're breaking your vows by being with him.” He says anger rising in his voice once more. “He should leave you alone, but he doesn’t.” He says and I could only imagine he was referring to Gerard… This was just getting weirder by the minute… I mean Will wanted me with Bob? He was mad at Gerard for coming between our marriage?

“Will I don't understand.” I tell him and he shook his head a little like he was trying to get some form of control back. “Mmm, you know what? It doesn’t matter okay?” I tell him gently, hoping to bring him back around but it didn’t look likely. “Forget Bob and Gerard – what are we gonna do with Will?” I asked him emphasizing the ‘we’ part…

I wanted him to know I wasn’t abandoning him. I wanted to help him but I didn’t know how. I didn’t know what he wanted from me…

“What do you need me to do Will?” I asked him and he just totally avoided answering my question and I felt this chill go down my spine again. He was looking around real nervously all of a sudden.

“Lets take a walk Michelle.” He says and I felt the blood drain from my face. But not because he called me by my full name, but because he was nodding towards the woods… the now extremely dark woods…

Did he seriously think I was gonna go in there? With him no less! And he had that fucking duffel bag thrown over his shoulder… Every fucking bone in my body was screaming no. But I honestly don't think I had a choice… I kinda stepped back from him without saying anything, but my body language was clear and it was a fuck no…

“Don't make this hard Elle.” He says with that menacing tone seeping though his voice again. I swallowed nervously but before I could answer him he spoke again, but softer this time. “She's not.” He says defending me to himself and I exhaled a little nervously as he smiled at me. I smiled stupidly back at him but I was freaking out in my head.

Aw man, this was not good… He wants to go for a fucking walk in the woods with a rope and shit… Damn it Elle, why are you so stupid! Fucking think of something!! And fast!

“Uh, lemme grab my cigarettes first kay?” I say to him trying to stall for time. I opened the car door to grab them and he pulled me back.

“I got them, now lets go before it’s too late.” He says and I bit my lip a little as he grabbed my arm.

“Too late for what?” I asked anxiously and I don't know if he smiled or what cause the shadows fell on his face now.

“You’ll see…”