Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The End Is Only The Beginning part 3
Karma. A basic law of the universe... What you give is what you get? What goes around comes around? How ever you want say it. I don't know… I don't what brought Brutus into that bar, be it fate, or destiny or just plain old karma. But to see him knelt down like that, beaten and broken, it just tore me up. Violence always left me uneasy…I felt no joy in his pain. But Nicky sure as hell did…
Jo-Jo tossed him a knife and with out hesitation Nicky just reached over and severed his left ear off. There was a scream. I think it was me and several more people left the bar now… there was hardly anyone left watching as Nicky knelt down to the right of him.
“That better?” He says dragging the knife slowly across Brutus’s neck, leaving a faint trial of blood behind. He was throwing the words back at him. The words that haunted my nightmares for so long, Nicky was tossing them back in his face… I felt sick, I felt beyond sick. The only reason I was still standing was because Eddie was holding me up. The sheer horror of it all was keeping me from passing out I suppose. “Anything you want to say before I cut off your tongue?” Nicky sorta laughed and I squeezed my eyes shut. I don't know who this man was standing in front of me was, but he wasn’t my father…
And then it hit me… All of this was because of me… Nicky was gonna kill this man because of me. I started this all. I was to blame. I cause so much destruction it was unbelievable… I tired to block out the sounds and the pain, but I couldn’t…
“Stand him up.” I heard Nicky demand and I fluttered my eyes back open, praying it was over, but it wasn’t… Brutus wasn’t gonna stand, I mean you could just tell that that wasn’t gonna happen cause of how his legs were bent out unnaturally. Nicky had to have broken them, and the blood was just everywhere…
“We can string him up in the back.” Jim sorta mumbled as I continued to sob as the men attempted to move him. I tried to tell Nicky to stop, that it was enough, but he wouldn’t… He said it wasn’t enough and I couldn’t understand...I couldn’t understand why he wanted me to watch either, but he did…
He had Eddie drag me into the back where he proceeded to rape Brutus with that broken bottle from before... Gave new meaning to the term ‘do unto others’…He had sliced him open with it and as his insides spilled out I just lost it. I was beyond horrified and Eddie finally spoke.
“Nick.” He says pleadingly almost. “She's uh…” He sorta shrugged like he didn’t know what to do with me anymore and it was no surprise why. I couldn’t cope anymore. It was all too much. I just started shaking uncontrollably and hyperventilating and I was so close to passing out in his arms… Nicky nodded as he looked me over.
“Alright get her out of here.” He tells him, and Eddie mumbled something back, I don't know. Then I heard Nicky say something about Jim getting jumper cables and I became nauseous…Eddie loosened up his grip on me at this point and I just ran. I ran out from the back, around the counter, and through the bar and just right out the door… I just needed air. I mean I never needed to breathe so badly in my whole life. Eddie came right out behind me in panic. I mean it wasn’t exactly the best neighborhood. I could only imagine what Nicky would do to Eddie if something happened to me.
I ran to the curb and just threw up. I hadn’t really been eating, not since Gerard died, just whatever Bob would force on me, and today was no different. I spit up mostly the beer I had drank with Nicky, and I just continued to heave and gag in the street as Eddie stood by frowning, but concerned none the less. He disappeared behind me and I thought that maybe he went in to get me some water, but he came out with a bottle of tequila and handed it to me. Fucking men…I took it from him and closed my eyes as I poured it down my throat. It burned like all hell but I didn’t care. It wasn’t doing much to wash down the bad taste in my mouth though…I stood up and stumbled towards my truck and as I went to open the door, Eddie was right behind me.
“Lemme bring you home.” He says as he sorta helped me in and I shook my head a little… Home? …Home? I didn’t have a home anymore… Not since Gerard died… Unless he meant that place where I live with Bob…Oh fuck… Bob…
And then this overwhelming desire took me over… I needed Bob… I wanted Bob… I wanted nothing more then to crawl into his arms right now. I reached in my bag on the floor and dug through it for my phone. I think Eddie thought I was getting the keys so he could drive me home, cause when he reached for them I snapped my hand back and he froze up and just looked at me like he was afraid I was just gonna start screaming for my dad. I flipped the phone open and pressed the button to call Bobby and as soon as he answered I became hysterical. I don't even know what I said. I think I cried out his name and started crying that I needed him and I heard him tell me to calm down and where was I and then Eddie took the phone.
“Who the fuck is this?” He sorta barked into it and I could imagine he was met with a similar reply from Bob. I don't know what Bob said but Eddie sorta smirked a little as he pushed my legs into the truck and shut the door. He stood outside and leant against the hood as he spoke to Bob on my cell, occasionally scanning his eyes up and down the road. Finally he hung up. He opened the door and handed me back my phone and sorta nodded at me. “You're husbands coming to get ya.” He says but I wouldn’t look up at him. I just sat there with my knees pulled against my chest, sobbing and trying to breathe as the lights flickered in the bar…
Eddie offered me a cigarette but I wouldn’t take it. He offered me more tequila and I refused. He even offered me a fucking piece of gum. But what I wanted he didn’t have to offer me …And that’s cause all I wanted was my life back… I wanted Gerard. .
Jo-Jo tossed him a knife and with out hesitation Nicky just reached over and severed his left ear off. There was a scream. I think it was me and several more people left the bar now… there was hardly anyone left watching as Nicky knelt down to the right of him.
“That better?” He says dragging the knife slowly across Brutus’s neck, leaving a faint trial of blood behind. He was throwing the words back at him. The words that haunted my nightmares for so long, Nicky was tossing them back in his face… I felt sick, I felt beyond sick. The only reason I was still standing was because Eddie was holding me up. The sheer horror of it all was keeping me from passing out I suppose. “Anything you want to say before I cut off your tongue?” Nicky sorta laughed and I squeezed my eyes shut. I don't know who this man was standing in front of me was, but he wasn’t my father…
And then it hit me… All of this was because of me… Nicky was gonna kill this man because of me. I started this all. I was to blame. I cause so much destruction it was unbelievable… I tired to block out the sounds and the pain, but I couldn’t…
“Stand him up.” I heard Nicky demand and I fluttered my eyes back open, praying it was over, but it wasn’t… Brutus wasn’t gonna stand, I mean you could just tell that that wasn’t gonna happen cause of how his legs were bent out unnaturally. Nicky had to have broken them, and the blood was just everywhere…
“We can string him up in the back.” Jim sorta mumbled as I continued to sob as the men attempted to move him. I tried to tell Nicky to stop, that it was enough, but he wouldn’t… He said it wasn’t enough and I couldn’t understand...I couldn’t understand why he wanted me to watch either, but he did…
He had Eddie drag me into the back where he proceeded to rape Brutus with that broken bottle from before... Gave new meaning to the term ‘do unto others’…He had sliced him open with it and as his insides spilled out I just lost it. I was beyond horrified and Eddie finally spoke.
“Nick.” He says pleadingly almost. “She's uh…” He sorta shrugged like he didn’t know what to do with me anymore and it was no surprise why. I couldn’t cope anymore. It was all too much. I just started shaking uncontrollably and hyperventilating and I was so close to passing out in his arms… Nicky nodded as he looked me over.
“Alright get her out of here.” He tells him, and Eddie mumbled something back, I don't know. Then I heard Nicky say something about Jim getting jumper cables and I became nauseous…Eddie loosened up his grip on me at this point and I just ran. I ran out from the back, around the counter, and through the bar and just right out the door… I just needed air. I mean I never needed to breathe so badly in my whole life. Eddie came right out behind me in panic. I mean it wasn’t exactly the best neighborhood. I could only imagine what Nicky would do to Eddie if something happened to me.
I ran to the curb and just threw up. I hadn’t really been eating, not since Gerard died, just whatever Bob would force on me, and today was no different. I spit up mostly the beer I had drank with Nicky, and I just continued to heave and gag in the street as Eddie stood by frowning, but concerned none the less. He disappeared behind me and I thought that maybe he went in to get me some water, but he came out with a bottle of tequila and handed it to me. Fucking men…I took it from him and closed my eyes as I poured it down my throat. It burned like all hell but I didn’t care. It wasn’t doing much to wash down the bad taste in my mouth though…I stood up and stumbled towards my truck and as I went to open the door, Eddie was right behind me.
“Lemme bring you home.” He says as he sorta helped me in and I shook my head a little… Home? …Home? I didn’t have a home anymore… Not since Gerard died… Unless he meant that place where I live with Bob…Oh fuck… Bob…
And then this overwhelming desire took me over… I needed Bob… I wanted Bob… I wanted nothing more then to crawl into his arms right now. I reached in my bag on the floor and dug through it for my phone. I think Eddie thought I was getting the keys so he could drive me home, cause when he reached for them I snapped my hand back and he froze up and just looked at me like he was afraid I was just gonna start screaming for my dad. I flipped the phone open and pressed the button to call Bobby and as soon as he answered I became hysterical. I don't even know what I said. I think I cried out his name and started crying that I needed him and I heard him tell me to calm down and where was I and then Eddie took the phone.
“Who the fuck is this?” He sorta barked into it and I could imagine he was met with a similar reply from Bob. I don't know what Bob said but Eddie sorta smirked a little as he pushed my legs into the truck and shut the door. He stood outside and leant against the hood as he spoke to Bob on my cell, occasionally scanning his eyes up and down the road. Finally he hung up. He opened the door and handed me back my phone and sorta nodded at me. “You're husbands coming to get ya.” He says but I wouldn’t look up at him. I just sat there with my knees pulled against my chest, sobbing and trying to breathe as the lights flickered in the bar…
Eddie offered me a cigarette but I wouldn’t take it. He offered me more tequila and I refused. He even offered me a fucking piece of gum. But what I wanted he didn’t have to offer me …And that’s cause all I wanted was my life back… I wanted Gerard. .
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