Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > Our Forbidden Love
CHAPTER 11
Tears poured down my face as I held a rigid Brendon in my arms. It hurt to look at him…but I had too.
This cant be happening. It just can’t be. This was my boyfriend, my Brenny-Bear. He was just there. Why did I leave him to run across the road? Why didn’t I wait with him then I would of pulled us out the way of the fucking car who just zoomed off. Why Why Why?
I pulled his body tighter to me, refusing to accept the fact he was dead. Around us, I could feel people rushing around, trying to help. And I thank them for it, but I wish they would leave us alone. But we wouldn’t be alone, I would be alone. Brendon’s with lots of people, up in heaven, a better place.
No, a better place is down here with me.
I tilted my head up slightly and glanced at people through my hair, Bella was being held by William, Diane by Spencer, Emma by Ryan and Brandy by Jon. But me? I had no one anymore.
I’m not going to let this happen. Not now, not when I’m the happiest I’ve ever been.
Suddenly my eyes became all foggier, a feeling of flying came over me and I could feel my arms move around in circles above my head. I had no idea what I was doing and I defiantly wasn’t controlling myself. Then my mind went blank.
~~~~~~*
“Hayley, Hayley, come on Hayles please wake up” I heard someone cry from a distance. I took a deep breath, and opened my eyes slowly. My eyesight was a little blurry still, but I soon regained focus on things. Diane and Emma were leaning over me, tears down their faces, William and Jon were holding Bella and Brandy who were shaking, and Spencer and Ryan were looking around nervously.
“Hayles!” Emma said and hugged me. I smiled and hugged back a little as I was in a bit of pain.
“Hey…guys. Erm, what happened?” I asked them, confused. Their eyes widened a little and they all gathered around.
“You…you don’t remember?” Brandy asked. I shook my head, then my mind clicked.
“Wait…I remember…oh god, Brendon…no” I mumbled, tears forming quickly in my eyes. Two arms wrapped around my tummy and hugged me from behind, I loved it when people did that. Wait, the only person who knows that…
“Brendon?” I whispered and felt the someone put their head on my shoulder. I was scared but I slowly turned my head to meet two big brown eyes. I felt my own eyes widen and gasped.
“Brendon…oh my god Brendon?” I whispered again, he smiled at me. I turned around and threw my arms around his neck. Tears rolled down my face and onto his shirt, but I was smiling.
“Hey darling” He whispered back to me. I let go of him and he put a kiss on my lips and wiped away my tears.
Everyone around us were smiling and crying. I looked into Brendon’s eyes, the eyes I thought I would never see again, looking back at me with the same amount of love in them.
“But how?” I asked, as I sat in-between his legs and he once again put his arms around my tummy.
“Well…I’m not actually sure to be honest, guys?” Brendon asked. Everyone shuffled closer. I looked around us, we were sitting in our secret spot that we found the other week whilst having our picnic. And well it’s pretty hidden and doesn’t seem like anyone’s been here. So we claimed it as our own.
“Well, we aren’t really sure, but what we saw was Brendon lying on the floor. Dead. And then Hayley was holding him, but dropped him suddenly and we could see her eyes sort of Fog up, and her arms started moving around in circles above her head and then over Brendon’s, and this cloud thing appeared and hovered for a moment, then went into Brendon’s mouth and he woke up and Hayley blanked out” Diane explained. Mine and Brendon’s jaws had dropped slightly.
“No way…” I said. They all nodded.
“So Hayley saved me?” Brendon asked, squeezing me slightly.
“Yup, she did” Diane said. Brendon laughed slightly.
“Aww thanks baby” He said. I giggled slightly and kissed his cheek.
“But, he was dead…how is that even possible?” I asked them. They all shrugged.
“I don’t know Hayley, but Brendon is alive now, and that’s all that matters” Ryan said, smiling. I nodded and smiled back. I looked around again and saw William and Bella whispering to each other, but quickly sprang apart when they saw me looking. They smiled at me and I smiled at them….but I was suspicious.
“So what did people say when you just…got up?” I asked. Everyone laughed slightly.
“Well they told us to wait for an ambulance to check me out, then they saw you and thought you got hit as well and told us to defiantly stay, but we knew you weren’t dead and if you were hurt we would do something, so we ran past everyone to here so no one would find us” Brendon explained. I nodded.
We all stayed silent for a while, taking in what just happened, how we almost lost Brendon and how the hell I saved him. Suddenly, Homesick at Space Camp was heard throughout the group. I dived into my messenger bag and pulled out my phone, flipped it up and answered it.
“Hello?”
“Hey darling, I just got a phone call saying Brendon was dead, I’m so so sorry Hayley”
“No, no mum its okay, he’s here…”
“What…how?”
“Look mum ill explain when I get home, ill be like 10 minutes tops”
“Okay cya then honey”
“Cya”
I flipped my phone shut and put it back in my bag.
“Well guys, I gotta go home now, mum found out and is now freaking out coz she thinks Brendon’s dead” I said. We all smiled amongst ourselves, then stood up. I brushed my self off as Brandy handed me my shopping bags. I smiled as a thanks to her and took Brendon’s hand.
We headed for our houses, which were luckily all on the same street, freaky huh? It was pretty quiet all the way there, we all still couldn’t believe what had happen and were scared to speak in case it was a dream. But this was not a dream…this was reality.
“Where’s Bella and William?” Emma asked suddenly. We stopped and looked around, surely enough they weren’t with us anymore.
“What the fuck, they were just there!” Spencer said, confused.
“Well then, they could have told us they were going…” Brendon said, and started walking off, obviously not caring much for them at the moment. We all followed again and as we reached our street, we separated, going to different houses. Ryan followed Emma into hers. Diane followed Spencer into his house, Brandy went to hers, and Jon went to his telling Brandy to come round later. I laughed at how the couples in our group are always together.
I turned to Brendon, smiling.
“Well cya guys” Bella said and started walking off with William.
“Cya tomorrow dudes….wait?” I said, they turned back around smiling.
“What’s up?”
“You weren’t there, and now you are, where did you go?” Brendon asked. They raised their eyebrows at us, making us feel a little stupid.
“We’ve been here all along, hey man are you sure you didn’t damage your head whilst getting run over?” William asked. My jaw dropped a little. RUDE !
“I’m pretty sure it didn’t” Brendon said coldly. They both shrugged and walked off to Bella’s house, we could here them laughing slightly.
I turned to Brendon again, who looked ready to kill.
“Baby calm down, ignore those pricks, I don’t know what’s got into them today” I said softly, taking his face in my hands. He lost h is angry look and replaced it with a smile and wrapped his arms around me.
“I was so scared I had lost you today…so many thoughts were going through my head” I whispered. Brendon rubbed his nose on mine in a comforting way.
“What thoughts?” He asked, also rubbing my back to soothe me.
“Like how this would never happen again, how id never hug you or kiss you again, id never be able to call you Brenny Bear to piss you off, never make you take me to Starbucks at 9 at night coz I need coffee, how I would never hear you sing with your beautiful voice ever again” I said, stating a few of the thoughts. He looked down at me, into my eyes.
“I’ll never leave you…ever” He whispered, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into a hug. I hugged back, breathing in his scent.
“Would you like to stay round mine tonight?” He asked. I nodded. He released. , took my hand and we walked up my garden path to my house to explain to my mum. I took out my key and as soon as I opened the door, Mum came running down the hallway, she threw her arms around Brendon and hugged him. He smiled and hugged back.
“Oh Brendon honey I was so scared, are you sure your okay?” Mum asked him, releasing him to check him over.
“Mrs Francis I'm fine, I promise” Brendon said. She pretended to hit him over the head.
“I keep telling you, call me Jenny or Mum like the rest of your group does!” Mum laughed, Brendon grinned.
“Anyways mum, I’m staying over at Brendon’s tonight, baby can you go pack me some things please?” I asked, he nodded, kissed my cheek and ran upstairs to my room. I went into the living room, followed by mum and sat down.
“Well?” She asked. And I started explaining everything that happened. She gasped as I explained about me getting the weird feeling, and about the cloud going into Brendon’s mouth.
“I really don’t know what happened, do you have any idea?” I asked. She bit her lip and took my hand.
“I need to tell you something, something I should have told…” She started, just as Brendon came bouncing into the room with my bag.
“Doooone” He grinned, but his face dropped when he saw us.
“Sorry did I interrupt?” He asked.
“Kind-“
“No, don’t worry about it” Mum said, letting go of my hands and standing up. I stood up as well, slightly confused, and went over to Brendon.
“Okay, well we are off now” I said, mum nodded and smiled. We over to the door and opened it. I kissed mums cheek and said goodbye and we went out, shutting the door behind us. We walked hand in hand over to Brendon’s house where we basically went through the same ordeal as in my house.
Once we were finally free, we went up to Brendon’s room. I jumped onto his bed and sat cross legged on it as he sat opposite, smiling at me. I smiled back and grabbed his black acoustic guitar. I handed it to him.
“Sing me something…please?” I asked. Brendon laughed and shook his head.
“I just died and you want me to sing?” He joked. I smiled and nodded. He just laughed again and sat more comfortably. He started playing the guitar.
This town just wasn't made for two
But when the streets they call my name, what can I do?
There's a place I'd like to visit there someday
And if you decline my invitation, what can I say?
What can I say?
What can I say?
When the corner light is dimmed on the street
And all the faces looked confused on those you meet
Tell your friends that I'll be dead when you read this
Tell them I couldn't take the pain of loneliness
Of loneliness
Of loneliness
I am feeling low
And I'm singing in my sleep when you're around, will you comfort me?
I'll dream of you
And the smile that you give, to me
You give to me
You give to me
It's the same thing everyday
Because we run out of things to say
If you're gone and me not here
It kind of sheds a different light on the whole year
On the whole year
On the whole year
I am feeling good
And I'm singing in my sleep when you're around, will you comfort me?
I'll dream of you
And the smile that you give, to me
You give to me
You give to me
You give to me
I sat stunned, all the way thought it. When he finished, he was breathing heavier.
“Wow…”
“Like it?” He asked. I raised my eyebrows.
“No, I hated it… of course I liked it douche bag!” I laughed, hitting him with a pillow. He grabbed it and hit me back.
“What’s it called?” I asked.
“First Try” He said, I nodded.
“Is it gunna be a Panic! song?” I asked. Brendon shook his head.
“Nah, just something I wrote the other day” He said.
“Oh right, well I think it was amazing baby” I said, hugging him.
“Well I think your mums amazing” He said. I stared up at him, in mock shock.
“Is there something you’re not telling me?” I asked.
“Yeh, your mums got a hot body” He said, I jumped up.
“Yeah well your mums got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch AND a better fuck!” I stuck my tongue out at him.
“Wow…they could be some pretty awesome lyrics…wait you slag!” He said. I laughed and ran out the door, downstairs with Brendon not far behind me. I ran into the kitchen where his mum was bending over, looking into the oven. I waited until I knew Brendon was watching and pretended to spank his mum. His eyes bulged and he grabbed me arms away just as his mum stood up. She turned around and Brendon turned the ‘holding back’ into a hug quickly. She smiled at us and turned back round to serve up dinner. I smiled at Brendon. He just shook his head in amusement and kissed me.
We sat down to eat; Brendon’s dad came in from work and sat with us. I took Brendon’s hand in mine under the table as he was explaining what happened again, this time to his dad. Every time I heard the story, I couldn’t help but feel more and more glad that Brendon was alive.
Once we had all finished, me and Brendon’s mum washed up as Brendon dried up and his dad went and relaxed. I washed the last plate and washed my hands, as Brendon put away the plate.
“Come on Hayles” Brendon said, taking my hand. His mum smiled as we left the room.
“Oh Hayley!” His mum called me back.
“Yup?” I said, standing in the doorway. She grinned.
“I’m sorry but I don’t go that way” She said.
“Huh?” I said, confused.
“Your reflection, I saw it in the oven” She said. Out on the stairs I heard Brendon laugh loudly. I blushed and giggled slightly.
“I’m sorry darling but I prefer men ya know?” She joked. I grinned.
“Oh damn, you see, Brendon just doesn’t do it for me anymore!” I said. She burst out laughing.
“Oi!” Brendon shouted, we laughed.
“That sexy beast in there just cant keep his hands off me, then again, neither can you!” She said, I winked sexily at her and we burst out laughing again.
“You’re an awesome girl Hayles” She said, wiping a tear from her eye where she had been laughing so hard.
“You’re an awesome fuck… I mean woman” I said, we burst out laughing for the third time.
“I know I know” She replied.
~~~~~
Back in Brendon’s room, we were lying in bed together, watching MCR’s Life On The Murder Scene. I never get bored of watching this, and knowing I'm seeing them live/ meeting them on Tuesday has just put me in the mood to watch it. Brendon had his laptop on his lap and was wearing his sexy red glasses. His eyes kept darting from the screen to the tv every so often, making me giggled. He looked down.
“What?”
“You’re so cute” I said, he laughed and kissed my head.
“Look at this, I showed Ryan what you said earlier and he made a song up using it, and its awesome!” He said, moving the screen so I could see it better, I read them.
“Wow they are great!” I said.
“I know right, we are gunna practice it tomorrow as Ryan has wrote his guitar music for it already and we’ll work around it” He said, I grinned.
“What would you do without Ryan eh?” I said.
“Be a very shit band…wait we would be a band” He laughed, I grinned and turned my attention back to MCR but the DVD had just finished. I yawned slightly.
“You tired baby?” Brendon asked. I nodded sleepily, he said goodbye to Ryan, shut down the laptop and crossed the room to turn the lights off. He got back into bed and put his arms around me. I shuffled closer to him and shut my eyes.
“I love you” He said, making me smile.
“I love you too” I said back, and felt myself falling asleep.
It was the dark room again. Two figures were standing together, hands placed on a table in front of them. Four pictures were lying next to each other on the table, 4 boys with the names Spencer Smith, Ryan Ross, Brendon Urie, and Jon Walker under them. All with a red cross over them. One of the figures placed another photo on the table, one of a girl with black hair, holding hands with one of the boys in the other photos. ‘Hayley Francis’ was written under it. The figures started talking in low, snappy voices.
“How was I meant to know she was one of them?” A boy’s voice asked.
“You should be more observant!” A girl’s voice shouted.
“You know her better then me!” The boy’s voice snapped back. The girl shook her head and left the room, shortly followed by the boy.
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