FicWad

I felt as if I hadn't heard her right. She couldn't possibly expect me to let Izzy strip off my shirt in front of everyone, could she? A little voice from inside me told me that she could. Candice was drunk...very drunk. Lots of people could get hyper and crazy when they got drunk. Apparently, Candice was one of those people.
Suddenly, I realized that everyone in the room was looking at us with wide eyes. My throat went dry and I couldn't speak. Izzy looked uneasily over at me and whispered in my ear so no one else could hear, "You don't have to do this, Amy. We can just say no. The last thing I want to do is pressure you into something."
I looked up incredulously at Izzy and returned the question, "Do you want to do it?" Izzy shrugged impassively, "I'm fine with it, but like I said, I don't want to put you in an uncomfortable position." Ugh, so Izzy was willing to do it! If we said no to the dare, everyone would know that it was me who hadn't wanted to do it and I would look like a complete wimp.
Clenching my teeth, I sighed, "Fine...we'll do it." Candice's eyes lit up and she commented, "Great! Let me just move the pizza boxes out of your way." I hoped Candice would move the pizza boxes slowly. I wasn't in any hurry to complete this dare. Unfortunately, Candice cleared the table rather quickly and then announced, "Okay, you're all set now." Izzy stood up from the couch and swung on top of the table with a graceful movement. Hesitantly, I stood up from the couch and followed Izzy over to the table. Jerkily, I managed to get myself on the table.
I made the mistake of looking down once I was standing on the table. The floor seemed to be a very long way down. From this angle, I could see everyone in the room staring at us with anticipation. My breath started to come in little gasps. Izzy bit his lip and looked at me dubiously, "Uh, maybe we shouldn't do this..."
"No," I replied resolutely. "Just get this fucking thing over with before I faint!" Izzy shrugged and slipped my shirt off in a swift movement. I shut my eyes tightly. The last thing I wanted to do was to see everyone's expression as they saw me standing in my bra. That was a sight I could miss seeing.
I could feel Izzy's cold tongue slowly lick around the edges of my bra before flicking onto my nipples. An unexpected rush of adrenaline flowed through my body and Izzy licked me all over. This was the kind of thing that usually happened before sex. But I definitely wasn't having sex tonight, that was for sure.
Finally, it was all over and I slowly opened my eyes. As soon as I opened them, I wished I hadn't. I could see everyone's expressions in only one glance. Mick was looking at the two of us with disgust. He clearly didn't approve of these kinds of games. Vince whistled loudly and shouted out, "Ooo, you've got a nice chest girl!" My face turned tomato red with embarassment. Nikki and Axl were both looking at me with shock and intrigue. God, why had I gotten myself into this mess?
Izzy quickly helped me re button up my shirt. I couldn't get it back on quickly enough. I took Izzy's hand and swung down from the table and retreated back to the couch. To my surprise, I found that silent tears of some sort of emotion were running down my face. Hoping that nobody else had noticed, I turned and tightly buried my face into Izzy's chest. Thank god he smelled good!
Izzy brushed away one of my tears surreptitiously with his index finger before holding me against him with both arms. Candice's screechy voice interrupted my misery, "Okay, Vince's turn! Truth or dare?" I shook my head against Izzy; these people were so stupid! I couldn't believe that they actually wanted to continue to play this game. But apparently, they did want to continue to play. Well, at least Candice did anyway. I wasn't sure if anyone else wanted to or if they were just going along with it to please her.
"Definitely a dare," I heard Vince say from what seemed like a long ways away. My headache was getting worse now and I felt like I was going to collapse at any moment. I tried to zone out the groups conversation, but it was impossible to do so after Candice's next words, "Okay then. Fuck your girl on the couch there in front of us all." Izzy immediately protested, "Okay, okay, enough! This is going a little bit too far. Why don't we all pack up and head to bed now?"
"But we didn't get to take a truth or dare yet!" Vince complained. The blonde girl's lip stuck out in a pout. Izzy sighed then agreed, "One more, but that's it!" Candice's lip curled, "Fine, but you and Amy are going to be in it again." I could feel all eyes turn onto Izzy and me without opening my eyes. I wanted to curse at Candice and protest loudly, but I didn't have the strength.
Thankfully, Izzy protested for me angrily, "That's not fair at all. We've already gone once." Candice plastered an innocent expression on her face, "You said we could do one more. And now you're stuck doing it. You'd better not complain or else I'll want to do three more truth or dares instead of one."
Izzy was obviously getting upset now, but he knew better than to argue with the almighty Candice, "God, you are impossible. Just give us the stupid dare and let's get this damn thing over with!" I wiped my face against Izzy's black shirt in an attempt to remove my tears. I didn't want everyone to know I had been crying.
"So for this dare," Candice started, "you two couples are going to see how long you can kiss each other without coming up for air. Whichever couple kisses longer wins. Are you ready?" Izzy pulled me gently away from him to get a good look at his face, "Can you do this? I promise this will be the last time if you can do this..." Izzy trailed off.
By this time, I was pissed off at everything and everyone. This Candice was was clearly insane and she seemed to be intent on making us all look like idiots. Fine then, I would do her last fucking dare and then I was going to collapse on the nearest chair and fall fast asleep and try to forget about this evening.
"Well, what are we waiting for?" I snapped angrily, glancing around the room. "Are we doing this or what?" Candice nodded with her brown curls falling in her face, "Okay. Ready, set, go!" Izzy gently took my lips between his. For a moment, I completely forgot that we were in the middle of a shitty truth or dare contest. I completely zoned out and pretended it was just Izzy and me in the room. Just when I thought I had forgotten about the people in the room, an excruciating pain burst from my forehead.
It felt as if their was a bomb ticking inside my skull that was about to explode. I broke apart from Izzy abruptly and tried to take a breath. But the breath couldn't come. It was as if my throat had completely blocked up. My head and mind started spinning faster and faster until everything was a blur. The blurred images were engulfed by black dots that were rising to meet me. Suddenly, my eyelids flopped shut and I tumbled onto the ground.



I was falling faster and faster from some high place. I had no idea where I was going. My breath came in short gasps and my whole body was trembling. I couldn't see anything around me; it was all black. Time started to slow down as I continued to be pulled downward. It was like falling into a black hole. I was getting sucked into the pit of blackness at an alarming rate. All the air was being drained and I couldn't breathe. Suddenly, realization dawned on me. I was going to be engulfed within the blackness within moments and I would die. Nobody could help me now, but just in case, I let out a bloodcurdling scream...
My eyelids whipped open and I could hear my own labored breathing in the darkness. My chest was shuddering and my head continued to pound. I tried to tell myself to relax. I had just had a bad dream, that was all. I was going to be okay now, but where the hell was I? The room surrounding me was completely unfamiliar. I had never seen it before.
The walls were painted a dark burgundy and the carpet was a cream color. I was lying in a queen sized, comfortable bed. The room was average sized and very formal looking. I sat up in bed to try to see if I could figure out where I was. That was a mistake. Immediately, my stomach seemed to flip upsidown and I felt like I had to be sick.
First, I was going to have to find a bathroom. That was top priority at the moment. After I had found the bathroom, I could then try to figure out where I was. I untangled myself from the silky sheets on the bed and slid to the ground. I was wearing a tank top and a short skirt. That came as a surprise to me; why would I be sleeping in my clothes? I wasn't at a hotel, was I?
Cautiously, I crept over to the door and tried the doorknob. The door slid open silently at my touch. I snuck along a long hallway until I reached a room that looked familiar. There was a brown couch with matching chairs in it and there was a large table that had several empty bottles littered over it in the center of the room.
I slapped my forehead as I comprehended where I was; Izzy's house! God, my memory must be awful or something. Last night's events came swirling back into my mind. I tried to push them out of my head. Those thoughts I would like to forget forever. A loud snore coming from the couch made me jump and freeze where I was standing.
Brown curly hair was visible from the couch. I leaned over the couch to see who it was. As soon as I had gotten a look, I quickly jerked backwards. Tommy and Candice were sleeping together on the couch. That wasn't really a surprise, but what did surprise me was that they were doing it in the middle of Izzy's living room! But everyone had been drunk last night so that was probably the reasoning behind their actions.
My stomach lurched again to remind me that I had to find a bathroom quickly. I left Candice and Tommy on the couch and proceeded to the room to the right. The door was closed, but I had to see if it were a bathroom. Hoping that the door wouldn't creak, I pushed it open. I slammed it shut almost as quickly as I had opened it. Axl and Erin were visible on the large bed in the center of the room. There was a sheet covering them, but the sight still disgusted me.
I could feel something rising up my throat. I had to throw up...now! I turned and ran back through the living room until I reached the kitchen. While I was looking around wildly for the sink, a small door at the corner of the room caught my attention. Without thinking about what I was doing, I barreled towards it and threw the door open carelessly.
Thank god; it was a bathroom. Feeling somewhat relieved, I slammed the door shut loudly behind me and threw my head over the toilet just in time. All the alcohol I had consumed last night seemed to explode from my stomach and into my throat. It splattered against the toilet and dripped down the sides of it.
To make matters worse, my head continued to hammer against my forehead in an agonizing headache. Having absolutely no strength in my body, I collapsed on the hard tile floor. Suddenly, a terrible smell floated into my nostrils and I sat up with a jerk. I looked down at my shirt and gasped aloud. Last night's half-digested lunch spilled down it. Ignoring the weakness in my legs, I forced myself to stand up and head over to the sink. I splashed water down the front of my shirt and resisted looking in the mirror.
I definitely did not need to see what I looked like right now. I could only image what a sight I must be with my tangled hair, green-tinged face, and shirt with vomit all down it. Why had I drank so much last night? I had told myself earlier in the night that I would only drink one glass of whiskey, but apparently I had ignored my own advice. I was just as bad as the rest of the drunkards.
Without any warning, a loud pounding came from outside the door. I jerked towards the door spontaneously and then drew back from it. I didn't want anyone to see me right now. It didn't matter who it was, nobody was going to be allowed in the bathroom. The pounding came louder and an irritable voice called in, "Whoever it is in there, open the door puh-leez!"
I didn't budge from my position at the sink. I ignored the voice and wiped the rest of the slop off the front of my shirt. Now my thin, white tank top was soaked and my bra showed through it. Shit. The door knob twisted and the voice shouted angrily, "Fine then; don't answer me! I can open the door anyways so here's your warning."
To my horror, the lock clicked and the door swung open. Guiltily, I looked up right into Izzy's face. His eyes had been clouded by sleep, but at the sight of me, they widen and cleared instantaneously. I crossed my arms in front of my chest and prayed Izzy wouldn't be looking at my see-through shirt.
Izzy's eyes swept over the vomit on the floor, the running water that was trickling from the sink, and me huddled in the corner. Izzy pushed his black hair out of his eyes and took a few steps towards me. I noticed he was careful to avoid the mess by the toilet. As he approached me, he murmured gently, "I'm so sorry, Amy. I didn't know it was you in here. I thought it was Candice. I was gonna kick her out for all the shit she had caused last night."
A tremor of fear ran through me; was Izzy going to kick me out now? I was in no condition for driving right now. After all, I could barely stand up. If Izzy did kick me out, I was going to have to sleep in my car and head home tomorrow morning. Waiting for Izzy's next words, I backed up against the wall.
Izzy stopped in his tracks and a hurt look crossed his face, "Hey, are you mad at me?" I shook my head silently. My whole body was shaking with fatigue at this point. My legs felt like jelly underneath me. Izzy tilted his head to one side and scrutinized me carefully, "Look, I'm sorry about last night. I didn't want Candice to come to the party. I just invited her along to be polite. I had no idea she was such a bitch. I don't see why you need to be upset at me though..."
I looked at Izzy in bewilderment; he thought I was mad at him? After finding my voice, I questioned in a weak tone, "What are you talking about? Aren't you going to kick me out?" Izzy returned my perplexed look and shook his head slowly, "No, why would I do that? And please be truthful with me. I think you do think last night was my fault, don't you?"
I sighed with relief and instantly my knees buckled underneath me and I slid down the wall to the floor. From my position on the ground, I looked up at Izzy and replied, "Of course I'm not mad at you. I'm just upset at myself for drinking so much to the point where I'm getting sick. Ugh, it hurts so bad, Izzy!"
Izzy sat next to me on the ground and took my hands into his. He stroked them gently and said, "I know, sweetie, I know. Hangovers aren't fun. Plus you didn't eat at all last night so you're really suffering. Is there anything I can do for you?" My mind spun as I tried to think of something I needed. An idea popped into my head at once.
I tried to smile seductively through my pain and said, "Well, a distraction from the pain would be nice. Um, do you have a knife in your kitchen somewhere?" Izzy looked at me nonplussed, "Yeah, doesn't everyone? Why are you asking me a question like that? Do you want something to eat?" I shook my head and hoped Izzy wouldn't ask anymore questions, "Nah, I'm fine. I need the knife though. Can you give it to me?" Izzy shot me a strange glance but shrugged and walked out the door, "I guess. Be right back."
I could a deep breath and sighed. It was going to be okay now. I would cut myself and divert my attention from the throbbing in my head and twisting in my stomach. Izzy better not catch on to my plan though.
Only a minute later, the door to the bathroom popped back open and Izzy reappeared with the knife. He handed it to me with a puzzled expression. I smiled and tested the blade with my fingertips. Good; it was sharp. I glanced up at Izzy and smiled cunningly, "Um, can I have a minute alone, Izzy? I think I'm going to be sick again."
Izzy was starting to look suspicious. A long tension held in the air as I waited to see what he would do. Thankfully, he retreated from the room. I waited until the door had clicked behind me before extending my left wrist. I struggled to find a vein in the darkness. After peering at the underside of my wrist carefully in the darkness, I finally found the desired vein. I put the knife to it and was about to plunge into it when the door whipped back open.
Surprised, I dropped the knife and let it clatter to the ground. Izzy was standing in the doorway with a furious expression on his face. Uh oh. This definitely meant trouble.
Feeling as if I were a criminal caught at the scene of the crime, I turned bright red and froze. Izzy cursed loudly under his breath and threw himself down on the floor next to me. His breath came in loud, angry gulps and he was staring at me with disappointment and unbelief. I couldn't think of anything to say so I kept my mouth shut and my eyes on the ground.
Izzy wasn't in a mood for silence though. He grabbed the glinting knife from the floor and waved it in front of my face hysterically, "Amy, what in god's name do you think you're doing?" I tried to answer Izzy, but words wouldn't come. I was afraid of his anger. I leaned back from him and squished myself against the wall.
Izzy didn't seemed to notice my fear because he was still raving, "So you were going to try to kill yourself, hm? You think suicide is fun? You want to go to hell?" I trembled against the wall and didn't reply. I had never seen Izzy this angry before. My eyes followed the knife as Izzy continued to wave it back and forth in front of me.
Izzy didn't seem to understand what was going on. He didn't know that I cut myself only for the temporary pain and distraction. I most certainly wasn't attempting suicide. The last thing I wanted to do was end my life. I hadn't accomplished anything in it so far and I most certainly wasn't in a mood to give up on it now even if I was in a lot of pain.
"Are you going to answer me or not bitch?" Izzy pressed on, staring at me with unfocused eyes. This time, I really did try to speak so I could explain to Izzy the situation. The only noise that came out of my lips was a helpless cry of pain. Izzy's anger seemed to dissolve when he remembered how much pain I was in.
Taking control of his anger, he set aside the knife and took a deep, calming breath before he spoke next, "I'm sorry, Amy. I shouldn't have gotten so upset at you. But please, you've got to explain this to me." I looked at Izzy with wary eyes. He saw my mistrust and added, "Don't worry. I won't hurt you."
"I-I was only going to cut. I wasn't trying to kill myself," I finally managed to say in a barely audible tone. "Cutting helps distract me from my pain." Izzy thought this through for a minute. It was clear by his expression that although he was trying to understand, he did not. He said, "Okay I guess. But that doesn't mean I'm going to let you do it. Do you have any idea how much impact you'd have on people if you accidentally killed yourself? It's easy to accidentally kill yourself once you start cutting."
I let out a laugh at this; nobody was going to care if I died. It was silly of Izzy to think so. I replied, "Geez, Izzy, nobody is gonna care if I die or not. The Crue will be grateful not to have to haul me around with them everywhere, my parents have already forgotten I exist, and Axl no longer likes me. Besides, life has totally sucked so far."
Izzy widened his eyes at my statements and was shaking his head vigorously, "No, no, no! You've got this all wrong. You matter to people, Amy. I can't be positive what the Crue members and Axl think of you, but I'm positive that they don't want you dead. And what about me? Do you not even give a shit about me? If you died..." Izzy trailed off and an expression of horror appeared on his face. I could tell he was imagining me lying dead in a pool of blood.
Unable to keep his feelings to himself, Izzy reached out to me and placed me in his lap. He wrapped both arms around me tightly and kissed my forehead, "Amy, please promise me something." I already knew what Izzy was going to ask me to promise. The only problem was that it was a promise I wasn't going to be able to keep.
When I didn't answer, Izzy pleaded, "Please, Amy? If you don't promise to stop this cutting, I'm gonna wake up every morning with a fear that you're dead. And if you died..." To my surprise, Izzy's voice cracked. I pulled back slightly from his chest so I could look up into his face. Shocked, I saw that he was biting his lip and his eyes were glassy with unshed tears.
I had no idea that Izzy had cared about me this much. I was touched at his affections and made a rash decision that I would forever regret. I lifted my hand and stroked his pallid cheek, "Oh, alright. I promise. Happy now?" Izzy nodded with relief and began kissing my neck fiercely.
I pressed a finger under his chin so he was forced to stare right into my eyes, "Izzy, do you really care if I live or die?" Izzy looked at me dubiously, "Oh god, Amy, of course I care. I care about it more than anything." Feeling that there was no more need for words, I sighed in contentment as he took my bottom lip between his in a soft, sweet kiss.
All the tension and fear seemed to slowly be released from my body. I suppressed a yawn and tucked myself tightly into Izzy's chest. What time was it? I remembered when I had gotten up that it was still pitch black outside so it couldn't be too late in the morning. My best guess was that it was two or three.
Suddenly, our peaceful embrace was interrupted as the door to the bathroom flew open without a knock. I swiveled around to look at the intruder and Izzy raised his head curiously. Standing in the doorway was Axl. He tucked a strand of auburn hair behind one ear and blinked to get his eyes used to the darkness of the bathroom.
Once his eyes had adjusted, he surveyed the scene before him. He looked disgustedly at the vomit on the bathroom floor adjacent to the toilet. His nose crinkled and he asked us, "What the hell are you two doing in here? And how can you possible even stand it in here? It smells worse than a pig's pen."
Feeling guilty, I eyed the mess on the floor and turned to Izzy, "Uh...sorry about that. Want me to clean it up now?" Izzy pressed a finger to my lips and shook his head, "Of course not. Don't be ridiculous." We exchanged smiles and Izzy kissed my lips again. Axl sighed from the doorway and pressed on, "Are you guys gonna answer me or am I gonna have to stand here until you do?" Izzy and I reluctantly broke apart and eyed Axl irritatedly.
From the expression on Axl's face, it was easy to tell that he would stand in the doorway until we answered him. I supposed I should explain what I was doing here in the bathroom so I responded to the question, "I got sick and Izzy found me in here." Axl nodded and was about to ask another question when his eyes flickered over to the knife on the tile floor.
His eyes widened with horror and he bent over to pick up the knife. As he leaned down close to us, I couldn't keep myself from looking him over. Even though he had just gotten up, he looked as handsome as ever. His hair was silky smooth and falling in his face as he bent down. God, he even smelled good!
Axl's angry words quickly broke me out of my reverie, "What the fuck were you doing with this? Don't tell me that you got into a fight and tried to kill each other or I'll kill you!" Axl didn't seem like he was joking. His lips were pursed tightly and there were several creases of worry on his forehead.
"We weren't trying to kill each other," I replied taciturnly. I didn't really feel like explaining the whole situation all over again. One time was enough for one night. Unfortuantely, Axl wanted more. He tapped his foot impatiently on the floor and stared at me with his piercing brown eyes, "So what were you trying to do then?"
"Can't you just go away, Axl?" Izzy suggested without turning to look at Axl. He was still looking at me as though I had hypnotized him. Furious, Axl shouted, "Until I know what the fuck is going on, I'm not going anywhere." Izzy sighed and finally turned to look Axl right in the eye, "Axl, it's not any of your business. Amy's tired. Can't you just leave us alone?"
Axl's fiery eyes flashed, "Fine. But you better be able to explain all this to me tomorrow morning. And for now, I'm taking this." Axl indicated the knife in his left hand. He squinted his eyes and peered over the room carefully, "There's no more potentially hazardous weapons in here, are there?" Izzy rolled his eyes, "Of course not. We're not building an army in here."
With one last look over his shoulder, Axl turned and slammed the door unnecessarily loudly behind him. Izzy apologized, "Sorry about Axl. I have absolutely no privacy from him."
"Mm," I murmured quietly. My body was started to shut down from lack of energy and fatigue. Even though my headache was gone, my body still ached all over and my stomach was growling loudly. I tried to think of the last time I had eaten, but I couldn't remember when that was. Oh well, I didn't need food. All I needed was rest.
Izzy leaned back a tad to get a good look at me. After looking me over, he frowned and said, "You don't look so good. Why don't we get you back to bed so you don't pass out on me again?" I nodded with relief and attempted to stand up. As soon as I let go of the counter, my knees gave way and I toppled to the hard floor with a crash.
Flinching with the pain, I tried to stand up again, but Izzy stopped me. He picked me up into his arms and cradled me against his chest. I was going to thank him, but my brain was too sleepy to form the words. Izzy walked through the living room, where Candice and Tommy were still sound asleep, and back into the burgundy room where I had been sleeping earlier.
He pulled back the bed covers and tenderly laid me down on one side of the bed. Immediately, my eyes fell shut. Izzy tucked the blankets up around my shoulders and then turned to leave. My eyes popped open again; I didn't want him to leave. The dark room was too unfamiliar and I wanted someone with me tonight.
"Izzy...please stay?" I implored, trying to sit up in bed. Izzy's eyes increased to the size of mini saucers as he stared at me in disbelief. I waited uncomfortably for him to say something. Had I said something wrong? Izzy finally answered, "Uh...I don't think tonight would be a good night. I had to say it, but you're really weak."
I shrugged, "What does that have to do with anything? I want you here with me tonight." Then I realized why Izzy was still staring at me doubtfully. He had probably assumed that I was asking him to sleep with me. Damn my slow mind; I couldn't even make my sentences come out right when I was so tired.
"What I meant," I tried to rephrase my sentence from earlier, "was that I wanted you to stay with me, not sleep with me." The look of incredulity was wiped off of Izzy's face and he nodded, "Oh. Um, I don't think it's a good idea though." I frowned and managed to sit up in bed so I could get a good look at Izzy, "Why not? Am I bothering you or something?"
Izzy shook his head and choose his next words carefully, "Of course you're not bothering me. It's just that I don't usually do this kind of thing." My eyes narrowed; what was that suppose to mean? Was he just trying to make up excuses not to be with me? Nikki had slept with me before and not fucked me. Sleeping next to me shouldn't be that big of a deal to Izzy.
Much too weary to continue arguing, I shrugged and flopped back down on my side on the bed, "Whatever then. Have it your way. Just make sure to shut the door behind you." With that, I pulled the covers over my head and waited to hear Izzy's retreating footsteps and the click of the door closing behind him.
Instead, I heard approaching footsteps and felt a movement next to me. I grinned to myself and rolled onto my left side and opened my eyes. Izzy was sliding under the covers next to me with a resigned smile on his face.
"So you're gonna stay," I stated the obvious. Izzy laid down next to me and rolled onto his side so we were facing each other, "Yeah. I'd do anything for you. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it. Is there anything I can do for you now?" I thought for a moment before answering. Then an idea popped into my mind. Maybe Izzy would drive me back home tomorrow? I hated the hour drive back to Los Angeles. It was so lonely to drive all alone and I got distracted on the highway much too easily.
"Um, maybe," I replied, still thinking the idea over in my head. Izzy waited, "Well? What is it?" I presented my idea to him, "Would you drive me back to my house tomorrow? We could keep each other company and you come see what my house looks like too if you wanted." Izzy grinned at me, "That sounds great. It'll give me an excuse to leave the house. Otherwise I'll be stuck here with Erin and Axl all day long." Izzy made a face and shuddered.
"Wait, why don't you want to spend the day with Erin and Axl?" I asked in confusion. After all, Axl was Izzy's best friend. Shouldn't he want to spend time with Axl? Izzy just laughed at my question, "Oh, I should lock you up with them sometime so you can see what it's like! All Axl does is talk about some band he's planning on creating someday or make out with Everly. And the most annoying part is that he doesn't have any ideas of how to start the band. He just fantasizes about it."
Understanding washed though me. It must be frustrating to constantly hear Axl talk about a new band when he had no ideas on how to start it. But of course, I didn't think I would ever get tired of listening to Axl. I could probably sit and stare at him all day long. Axl was like the idol and I was the worshiper.
Suddenly, another wave of fatigue washed over me and I remembered how worn out I was. I snuggled closer to Izzy and nestled myself against him so that our bodies were touching lightly. To my surprise, Izzy pushed me roughly away and reprimanded me, "God, Amy!" Feeling rather hurt, I retreated to the far left side of the bed and stared at him quizzically.
Something odd was going on with Izzy tonight. Sometimes it seemed like he wanted to be with me and at other times like he wanted to get away from me. I was determined to figure out what was wrong with him. If he didn't really love me, now was the time for him to tell me before we got too far into our relationship. But of course, we were already pretty far in our relationship that it would hurt me if he admitted that he didn't have any feelings for me.
I tried to put an expressionless expression on my face as I turned to question Izzy, "Okay, so what's up? You keep trying to get away from me. What's up with that? Have you decided you don't like me after all? If you have, just let me know. It's not fun to have your heart toyed with you know."
Izzy frowned and shook his head with certainty, "What the hell would make you think that I don't love you? Do you think I would've just agreed to drive you all the way back to Los Angeles tomorrow if I didn't love you?" I considered the question. Izzy did have a point; he wouldn't have agreed to spend tomorrow with me unless he had feelings for me, right? Or perhaps he was just trying to get away from Erin and Axl like he had said earlier?
"Well, no," I answered his question. "But why do you keep trying to get away from me?" Izzy's answer was succinct and irritated, "Because I don't want to get that close to you right now." I felt as if he had punched me in the face. All of this was so hypocritical. He didn't want to get close to me, but he said he loved me? That didn't make one bit of sense.
"Why not?" I asked, trying to to seem to hurt. Izzy was sitting up in bed now too and his black eyes were flashing dangerously at me. He snapped back, "Because if you get any closer to me, I'm gonna have to tear your clothes off and fuck your guts out so you should keep your distance!" The two of stared at each other for a moment in silence.
My cheeks flushed and I looked away from Izzy in embarrassment. When Izzy spoke again, his dark eyes had stopped flashing and his voice was gentle, "I'm sorry. It's not your fault, but I don't have much self control. Hurting you is the last thing I want to do. You understand, right?" I understand just fine.
"Yeah, I get it," I replied. I wished I didn't feel like I was about to fall into darkness at any moment. Truth be told, if I was stronger, I would've wanted Izzy to make love to me. But since I was about to pass out at any moment, that probably wouldn't be a very smart idea right now. I felt Izzy's arms close around me and pull me back against him.
"Oh, you win," Izzy said, "Just pray I can stay in control of myself tonight." I flashed him a lazy smile, but didn't cuddle any closer to him just in case. A moment later, we were kissing each other with soft, innocent kisses. I could feel myself relax. It wasn't long before my eyelids closed and I ventured off into darkness.


I awoke in a nice, cozy bed pressed against Izzy's body. Light was shining through the window and lighting up the room. It must be morning by now. I figured I should probably get up. After all, I had told my mom that I would be home by noon today. If I didn't show up by noon, my worrywart of a mother would panic and start calling the police with a missing persons report or something. I rolled my eyes to myself as I thought about my mother.
But the bed was so warm...and I felt so relaxed right now. I didn't have any desire to get up at the moment. I flipped over on my other side so I was facing away from the darkness. I told myself that I would sleep for just five more minutes then get up. Five more minutes wasn't going to hurt anyone, right?
Five minutes came and went in the blink of an eye. Slowly, I unwrapped myself from Izzy's arms and slid silently onto the floor. I padded quietly over to the door and opened it silently. Being quiet so as to not wake anyone who might be sleeping, I crept through the kitchen to the bathroom I had visited late last night.
I was surprised to find that the bathroom was sparkling clean. Someone must've gotten up early to clean it before anyone else woke up. I assumed it was Axl, but I didn't have any proof of it. After shutting and locking the door behind me, I glanced into the mirror. To be honest, I didn't look as bad as I thought I would've looked. My eyes were dark, but besides for that, I didn't look too terrible. Rummaging through Izzy's messy drawers, I finally found a hairbrush. I yanked it through my long, brown tresses before pulling it up into the usual boring ponytail. I regretted not having my makeup with me. Some eyeliner and lip gloss would add quite a bit to my appearance. It might even be enough to make Axl look at me.
I immediately tried to turn away from those thoughts as I exited the bathroom and went into the living room. I was starting to get a little annoyed at myself for thinking about Axl still. Axl was Erin's and that was all there was too it. I couldn't try to outdo Erin to try to win Axl over and I certainly wasn't going to make any moves on him. Shuddering, I remembered the episode with Beth Lynn and Vince. I didn't ever want to go through anything like that again.
"Hey Amy," a voice greeted me from the living room. Tommy and Candice were sitting fully clothed on the couch with their arms around each other. Tommy looked drowsy, but Candice seemed to have as much energy as last night. I shot the girl a suspicious look out of the corner of my eye. I was still pretty pissed off at her for causing so much stress last night. I was also quite annoyed that she didn't look like she was going to suffer a hangover at all. Lucky girl.
"Hi Tommy," I replied in an emotionless voice. "Where is everyone?" Tommy sighed and replied, "Uh...lots of places. Nikki and Lita went home with Mick earlier. Vince had to dropped his date back off at her house. Axl and Erin are eating breakfast I think. And that's everyone...except you and Izzy."
"Oh my god," I said glancing wildly around the room for a clock. "Is it really late or something?" Candice ignored my questioned and burst out in a loud tone, "Ooo, what happened last night?" Completely confused, I gave Candice the you-are-crazy look. Tommy seemed to be a little confused too because he answered Candice gently, "Um, no one knows what you're talking about, Candi. Why don't you elaborate a bit?"
Candice looked at Tommy as if she thought he was a little thick in the head before replying, "You must really be still asleep, Tommy! I meant, what happened last night with Amy and Izzy. They must've been staying together if you haven't seen Izzy yet this morning." I blushed and felt my temper flare. This girl was the last person in the world who I was going to talk to my sexual life about. As a matter of fact, she was the last person I wanted to talk about anything.
Tommy chastised Candice in a tolerant manner, "Candice, that's really not something we need to talk about." Turning to me, he answered my question from earlier, "It's eleven-thirty, Amy. We should probably head back to Los Angeles pretty soon. Besides, your mom will worry, won't she?" Tommy was looking at me knowingly.
It was funny how Tommy even knew my mom so well. I nodded. Unable to resist herself, Candice blurted out, "So guys, I heard funny noises from the bathroom last night. And I saw Izzy and Amy go in there. Then Axl went in there and came back out with a knife. I wonder what that was all about, don't you?"
I felt like slapping the girl; couldn't she just keep to herself? She must've been spying on me last night. I had thought she and Tommy were sound asleep when I had crept through the living room. Apparently not. Luckily, I wasn't forced to answer Candice's question because Izzy chose that exact moment to stride into the living room.
I resisted the urge to punch Candice and managed to place a small smile on my lips. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see Tommy eying me with interest now. To hell with Candice for perking Tommy's curiosity!
"Hey guys," Izzy greeted us with one of his lopsided smiles. Even though he had obviously just gotten out of bed, he still looked attractive to me. Candice glanced between me and Izzy and whispered evilly in Tommy's ear, "See? I told you!" Izzy looked at Candice with an expression that he had no idea what she was talking about.
"So are you guys hungry?" Izzy asked in an attempt to cover up the awkwardness of the situation. I leaped out of the couch, grateful to get away from Tommy and Candice, "Sure. Let's go to the kitchen, hm?" Izzy shot me a knowing look and took my hand as we meandered side by side into the kitchen.
Once Izzy was certain that we were out of Candice's earshot, he stopped in the hallway and turned me around to face him. His smile had disappeared and his expression was serious, "How are you feeling this morning, Amy?" I looked up into his dark, concerned eyes and felt hypnotized as I answered, "Much, much better than last night." I shuddered then added, "Uh, sorry about the bathroom incident. Did you clean it up?"
Izzy shook his head, "Nah. Axl probably did it. He hates messes." Izzy abruptly broke off as Tommy and Candice appeared at the end of the hallway. The two of us spun around to see what they were doing. Wishing for some privacy without nosy Candice around, I snapped, "What are you guys doing?"
Candice giggled as she looked at the two of us and then simpered in a lilting voice, "Why, we were just going to the kitchen to get breakfast. You don't mind do you, Izzy? After we eat, we'll be off. Tommy wants to show me around Los Angeles. Isn't that right, Tommy?" Tommy nodded eagerly with the look of a starstruck lover on his face.
"No, I don't mind if you get breakfast," Izzy replied with as much courteous as possible. I groaned under my breath. No matter where I seemed to go, Candice was always around. I couldn't wait until Izzy had gotten breakfast and was ready to head back to Los Angeles with me. What I really wanted was some time alone with him.
The four of us walked through the long hallway and into Izzy's small kitchen. Axl and Erin were sitting on stools by the counter and had cereal bowls in front of them. They didn't really seem to be eating though. Erin was in Axl's arms and they were kissing passionately. I noticed Axl's hand slipping under Erin's tightly fitted black shirt.
I paused in the doorway of the kitchen, not wanting to interrupt the makeout session. Izzy took one look at the two in the kitchen and whispered in my ear, "See why I don't like being alone with Axl and Erin?" He pushed past me into the kitchen and slapped Axl on the back to get his attention, "Okay, okay, break it up you two!"
Erin slowly pulled away from Axl's embrace with a look of longing on her face. Then she turned to us completely unabashed and smiled with those bright red lips of hers, "Hello everybody! Nice morning outside, isn't it?" I had no idea what the morning was like, so I just nodded dully. My heart that had twisted painfully at the sight of Axl and Erin slowly started untwisting.
"So what do you guys want to eat?" Izzy asked. He yanked open the refrigerator door and scanned the shelves. Candice immediately shouted out what she wanted, "I'd like doughnuts please. You know, the kind with the jelly in the middle?" Erin and Axl exchanged amused looks and I heard Erin whisper to Axl, "Thinks she's the little princess, doesn't she?"
Axl smirked and nodded. Candice looked over at the couple impudently. Izzy bit his lower lip with frustration and turned to Candice with as much respect as he could muster, "Um, I don't have doughnuts. But I do know that there are some at the gas station nearby. Since you guys were going to leave after breakfast, you could stop there and pick some up?"
I crossed my fingers inconspicuously behind my back and hoped Candice and Tommy would leave now to pick the doughnuts up. To my regret, Candice shook her head, "Never mind. What do you have for breakfast in this little shack of yours?" I bit my lip. Candice was being very insulting. Even though she was a guest here, she was acting like she was the queen and that Izzy was her servant. One of the veins in Izzy's neck was standing out and I thought he was about to cuss at Candice.
But as usual, Izzy surprised me, "I have cereal and fruit here. If that's not what you're looking for, you and Tommy are more than welcome to go out to breakfast. I'm not pleading with you to stay here." Candice pulled herself up to her full height and tried to look indignant, "Fine then! Let's go out for breakfast, shall we? I'm sure we can find some nice service elsewhere."
Without waiting for Tommy's answer, Candice swung on her heel and struttered out of the door like an arrogant peacock. Tommy waved to me with that same dreamy expression on his face before trailing after Candice. As soon as the door fell shut behind them, Izzy swore, "God, what a bitch!" Erin giggled and took a bite of her cereal.
Axl put a serious expression on his face and did a good impersonation of Candice with a high pitched voice, "Now Izzy, I'd like doughnuts for breakfast with glaze on top and the jelly in the middle. And don't forget the coffee! Make sure it has lots of cream and sugar in it." We all burst out laughing and Erin choked on her orange juice.
Izzy dropped two boxes of cocoa puffs and corn flakes on the table with a grin on his face, "You can always make us laugh, Axl. I have no idea how Tommy Lee can actually go out with that woman! She must be nice to fuck if he's still putting up with her." Erin gave Izzy a disapproving look and responded, "Well, I'm sure Tommy sees something in her besides sex appeal."
Axl draped an arm around Erin's shoulders and stated, "See why I'm never letting this woman go? She always sees the best in everyone. Who wouldn't want a woman like Erin?" Erin blushed at Axl's compliments and reached over to stroke his cheek gently. Seeing the two so in love made me sick and I turned away so I wouldn't have to witness their affection.
"No offense to Erin, but I'd rather have Amy," Izzy commented as he started pouring cocoa puffs into one of the bowls that he had pulled out from the cupboard. That was something I always loved about Izzy. He was so honest. Izzy turned to me and said, "Do you want corn flakes or cocoa puffs?"
"Uh, I'm not hungry," I tried to say in a light casual voice. Hopefully, Izzy wouldn't fuss. But deep in my heart, I knew he was going to protest. Before he had time to say anything, I turned to Axl and Erin, "So what are you two doing today?" Erin tore her gaze of off Axl's face and answered me, "We're just going to do some shopping around town. I could really need some new clothes." Erin paused, looked me up and down, then added, "Speaking of new clothes, would you like to borrow some of mine? I see you're still wearing the same clothes from yesterday."
New clothes would be really nice. I was sick of wearing the simple white tank from yesterday. Besides, it might still smell a little bit. I didn't really feel comfortable borrowing clothes from Erin though. I barely knew her and who know when I would see her again to return the clothes? But the temptation was too great for someone like me, and I found myself replying gratefully, "That would be really nice, Erin. Are you sure you don't mind?"
"Don't be silly!" Erin exclaimed, jumping off her stool and motioned for me to follow her to the bedroom she and Axl had shared last night. "I'd do anything for a friend. Come on, we'll find you something good." Leaving Axl and Izzy alone in the kitchen, I quickly followed Erin to the bedroom. Once inside, she pulled open a drawer and began digging through it.
A minute later, she emerged from it holding a miniskirt and brown shirt. I ogled the clothes with wide eyes. The skirt would land about a foot above my knees and the top had a very low neckline. It wasn't something I would normally wear, but maybe it would help me attract the guys. Erin laid the clothes out on her bed and said, "How about this? These would look cute on you."
"Yeah, it's great," I replied appreciatively. "Thanks a million for this, Erin." Erin grinned through her tomato red lips as she retreated out the door, "Don't mention it. I'll leave you to get changed." After the door shut behind her, I yanked off my sweaty white tank and skirt from yesterday to replace them with the clothes Erin had given me. Peering into the mirror, I barely recognized myself. The skirt made my pale legs look long and skinny and the top was so tight that it showed off every curve of my body.
Trying not to feel too self conscious, I returned to the kitchen where Axl, Erin, and Izzy were happily munching on cocoa puffs and talking in loud voices. Izzy let out a long whistle as I entered the room, "Wow, don't you look sexy this morning?" I blushed and felt Axl's eyes on me as well. Erin coughed to regain Axl's attention. A shiver of thrill went through me; was Erin actually jealous that Axl was looking at me? Izzy interrupted my thoughts and stated, "I'm ready to go back to your house whenever you are. Just tell me when you're ready girl." I glanced up at the clock in the kitchen and gasped. My mom would probably be pacing back and forth in the living room right now.
"We should go now so my mother doesn't worry," I stated and rapidly tried to slip my sandals back on. Izzy laughed, "You still live with your mother? Well, we shouldn't make her worry. Seeya later guys!" Izzy waved to Axl and Erin and shut the door behind us. I didn't really want to leave Axl and Erin alone in Izzy's house together, but I didn't really have a choice.
Izzy noticed my gloomy expression and said, "Aw, cheer up! Today's gonna be fun. Want me to drive?" I nodded and got into the passenger seat of my black jetta. I didn't particularity enjoy driving. Izzy pulled out of the driveway and took the highway that led to Los Angeles. He pulled on a pair of dark sunglasses and remarked, "You should come back to my house sometime and I'll take you for a ride sometime." I froze and tried to figure out what Izzy was talking about. Was he talking about sex?
Izzy sensed my shock and added, "What?" I twisted my fingers in my lap uncomfortably. I wasn't sure if I was ready to have sex yet. I had never done it before and I hadn't ever really thought about actually doing it. Sure, I had fantasies about it, but I hadn't thought about the real thing. But I had to answer Izzy right now, so I left my answer vague, "Uh, I dunno."
Frowning, Izzy took his eyes off the road to look over at me, "Why not? Haven't you been on a motorcycle before?" I let my breath out with a long sigh of relief; Izzy was talking about taking me for a ride on his motorcycle. God, why did I always assume the worse? My fear gone, I replied happily, "Yeah, I have. I'd love to go with you sometime."
Izzy flashed a big grin and took his eyes off the road to look at me. I could feel his gaze travel over my chest and linger on my breasts. Blushing, I waved a hand in front of Izzy's face and said, "What are you looking at?" Now it was Izzy's turn to blush. He quickly returned his gaze back to the road, "Oh nothing. You're just...distracting. But that's okay."
I didn't respond to that. It only made sense that Izzy would start looking at my body. We were far enough into our relationship where most couples did that kind of thing. I was starting to feel the sexual tension between us as we continued to ride back to my house in silence. It was clear to me now that Izzy wanted my love, but he didn't want to force himself on me.
I should be grateful for that, right? I didn't want a lover like Vince who was always pressuring me about sex all the time. That would definitely lead to an abusive relationship. But part of me wanted Izzy to make a move. I knew I wasn't going to make a move first. It was going to be all up to Izzy. I didn't dare make a move for two reasons. First of all, if I was being honest, I was scared. And second, I didn't want to make a wrong move and spoil my relationship with Izzy. Izzy was different than anyone I hated dated before. One wrong move and I could lose him easily. There were many girls out there and Izzy didn't have much self control as I had seen with the waitress from the restaurant that we had gone to with Axl. Somehow, I had to keep Izzy and myself in our comfort zones, but also maintain his interest. But of course, I had not the slightest idea of how to do that.

"Izzy, slow down!" I reprimanded as we pulled into my familiar neighborhood. Izzy was flying across the road at a shocking fifty miles per hour. The speed limit for our little neighborhood was twenty-five miles per hour at maximum. I glanced around nervously and prayed that there wasn't a police around because Izzy definitely deserved a ticket.
Izzy casually pushed a foot down on the brakes and apologized, "Sorry. It's more fun to drive fast though." I laughed, "Vince is like that too. He loves to drive fast." I chucked to myself at the thought of Vince. Suddenly, the thought darkened. I still hadn't talked to Vince about Beth Lynn. I kept getting busy or procrastinating. I really couldn't procrastinate any longer though. Beth's child was to be born soon and I wanted Vince to be with Beth during this time. Poor Beth was probably still at my house keeping my mother company.
Izzy frowned at the mention of Vince's name, "You mean Vince Neil? Well, we might be similar in the fact that we like to drive fast. But besides for that, I assure you that we're completely opposites." That was true. Izzy was tall with pale skin and the blackest of black hair. Vince had a nice Californian tan with platinum blonde hair and eyes the color of the bluest ocean.
"Hey Izzy, see that brick house to your left? You can pull in the driveway there," I ordered Izzy, pointing at my home. Izzy had to slam down on the breaks so he didn't go speeding by my house. He turned to me with a sheepish grin as pulled into the driveway at an alarming speed, "Sorry about that. Maybe I shouldn't have been going so fast."
"Oh well," I stated and popped out of the car. "Come on, let me show you around!" Izzy followed me eagerly up the driveway. I prayed that my mom wouldn't be in the living room. I didn't really want her to meet Izzy. I had a feeling that she wouldn't like him. My mom didn't like the idea of me dating very much. The only man she had ever approved of was Mick. I would never know what it was about Mick that she had approved of. Sometimes my mom could be very finicky.
As quietly as I could, I opened the front door and motioned Izzy inside. He stepped inside and took in his surroundings curiously. As soon as I had shut the door behind me, a frantic voice shouted my name, "Amy! There you are! You've had me worried sick. You said you were going to be hours ago. And who is this?" My mom asked as she caught sight of Izzy.
"Sorry mom," I apologized as sincerely as I could. "I didn't mean to be late. This is Izzy Stradlin." My mom looked Izzy up and down and a look of disapproval crossed her face, "Hmph." Then she caught sight of my skimpy outfit and her eyes widened in shock, "What is that thing you're wearing? You look like you're trying to be a porn princess. Go change out of that thing at once!"
"Yeah, yeah," I answered her without really listening. Her lectures were always the same and got repetitive. "First, I'm going to show Izzy around though." Without waiting for her answer, I took Izzy's hand firmly and dragged him into the kitchen. As soon as we were safely away from my mother, I sighed and apologized, "Sorry about my mom. She's not the friendliest woman."
"Obviously," Izzy replied rolling his eyes. "I can sure tell she doesn't like me! Anyways, nice kitchen. Can we see your room though?" I nodded and led Izzy through the living room and up the winding stairs to my bedroom. I was surprised to find that the door to it was shut. Why would it be shut? I didn't remember leaving it shut when I had left.
I whipped open the bedroom door and looked around suspiciously. Beth Lynn was sitting on my bed reading a magazine. No doubt she had shut the door to get some privacy. I laughed to myself as I shut the door behind us. Beth Lynn set down her magazine and looked up at me happily, "Hey there, Amy! I was hoping you'd be home soon. How was the trip?"
Beth Lynn looked really nice today. She was wearing a lacy pink top and holey jeans. Her sleek blonde tresses were curled and her makeup was done to perfection. Why would she be so dressed up? Resisting asking her the question in my mind, I replied, "The trip was pretty nice. Crue did a great job. How have you been?"
Izzy coughed next to me. Beth Lynn turned her gaze on him and her eyes widened with surprise, "Who's this?" I quickly made the introductions, "Beth, this is Izzy Stradlin. Iz, this is Beth Lynn. She's Vince's wife." Izzy and Beth stared at each other for a long moment without saying anything. The silence was so long that the atmosphere was starting to get uncomfortable.
Just when I was about to say something, Izzy flashed Beth one of his brilliant smiles and crossed the room to where Beth was sitting on the bed. He extended his hand to her, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Beth." Beth Lynn quickly shook Izzy's hand and blushed furiously, "Nice to meet you too, Izzy."
I watched the two with revulsion. There was something wrong. I had never seen Beth Lynn blush because of the presence of a guy before. And the way the two looked at each other was disgusting. Have you ever heard the phrase "love at first sight"? Well, that was the expression on both of their faces.
I told myself to calm down. Maybe I was just being paranoid like usual. After all, nothing could happen between Izzy and Beth. Beth Lynn was married and Izzy was mine...right? I had to remind myself that Izzy was not my property. I didn't have a claim on him or a promise. But deep down in my soul, my strongest desire was for him to love me and no one else.
"Uh, want to see the living room, Izzy?" I asked as innocently as I could. My top priority was to get Izzy out of this room and away from Beth Lynn. As much as I was trying to ignore it, the attraction between the two could not be hidden. Without turning to look at me, Izzy replied in an impassive voice, "I already saw the living room."
I knew Beth Lynn was naturally very beautiful, but I couldn't help but feel slightly angry with her for hypnotizing my lover. Pretending that I could care less that the two were still shaking hands much longer than necessary, I turned on my heel and tried to say in an indifferent tone, "I have some things to do downstairs. I'll...uh...see you guys later." Without waiting for an answer, I exited my bedroom and slammed the door rather loudly behind me.
I trudged down the stairs and tried to think of something to do. I didn't want to go back into the living since my mother was still in there so I decided to hang out in the kitchen. Leaning against the kitchen counter, my thoughts wandered back upstairs to Beth Lynn and Izzy. Now I was starting to wish I hadn't left them alone in my bedroom. For all I knew, Izzy could be fucking her right this minute. My stomach twisted painfully and I felt like I was going to get sick.
Footsteps rounded the corner and a second later my mother emerged into the kitchen with a stern expression on her face, "Why do you still have those clothes on? You told me you were going to change." Slowly, I turned to face my mother and replied irritatedly, "How do you expect me to change when Beth Lynn and Izzy are still in my room?"
My mom's expression immediately softened, "Oh, I'm sorry. I must say, I didn't like Izzy much from the start though. He seems like just the kind of guy who would go off after another woman. Anyways, what about Mick? I liked having him around. Maybe you could see if you could get back together with him."
God, my mom just couldn't get over Mick, could she? The woman could never figure out when to let things go. Through clenched teeth, I answered, "Mom, Mick and I are over. How many times must I tell you that? Also, I never said that Izzy was going after Beth Lynn now, did I?" My mom looked down at her feet and mumbled, "Well no, but I assumed-"
I cut off her sentence and snapped, "Well, you assumed wrong." Not wanting to stay and chat with my mother about this uncomfortable subject, I stalked out of the room without really thinking about where I was going. A few minutes later, my feet stopped moving and I found myself in my parent's large bedroom. They had a nice, big king size bed with the painting of brightly colored flowers above it. To the right of the bed was a full length mirror edged in gold. An intricately carved nightstand stood to the left of the bed. Abruptly, I realized just how tired I was. I couldn't say I had exactly slept well last night.
I kicked off my shoes and flopped onto the center of large bed. I rolled to the center of it and laid on my back, staring at the ceiling. My eyelids fluttered shut and I tried to clear my brain so I could fall asleep. I was concentrating so hard on clearing my thoughts that I didn't hear the bedroom door open or the soft footsteps approaching.
"Uh, Amy?" a voice questioned quietly next to me. I just about jumped a foot into the air with shock. My eyelids flashed back open and I flipped onto my left side to see Izzy standing on the right side of the bed. I was still pissed off at him for flirting with Beth so I snapped back, "What do you want? You could've just asked Beth if you needed something. She practically lives here these days." I was starting to wish that I hadn't let Beth Lynn stay in my room. But of course, I couldn't let her go home to abusive Vince until her baby safely born. I prayed that the baby would be born soon.
A hurt look appeared in Izzy's eyes and his smile disappeared, "Are you okay? You seem upset. Is there something you want to talk about?" Of course there was something wrong! However, I decided that I didn't want to talk to Izzy about Beth. I returned to sulking and lashed out, "There's nothing to talk about."
I rolled back onto my left side so I was facing away from Izzy. A long silence followed and for a few minutes I thought he had left. Then there was a loud creak in the springs of the bed as Izzy sank down next to me. Still angry, I stayed facing away from him and didn't say anything. He was going to have to apologize first if he wanted to talk to me.
"Look, is this about Beth Lynn, Amy?" Izzy guessed. So he did know what was wrong! Hm, that meant that he must have feelings for Beth Lynn. That thought pushed me over the edge. I pivoted on the bed and turned to face him with my eyes flashing dangerously, "Yes, of course this is about Beth Lynn! Don't think I didn't see the way you were looking at her because I did. And don't you even think about denying it. I should've known that I wasn't good enough for you. Of course you need a supermodel like Beth Lynn to satisfy you. No wonder you won't touch me or want anything to do with me."
I would've said more, but my breath was coming in and out in short, angry gasps. My cheeks were flushed and I really felt like slapping Izzy. Izzy's eyes had widened at my accusations and he looked afflicted.
"First of all," Izzy started as calmly as he could, "Beth Lynn is a very beautiful woman. I don't think any guy could resist looking at her." That statement felt like an arrow in my heart. What the hell was Izzy trying to say? Was he saying that I wasn't nearly as pretty as Beth Lynn and that anyone would take her over me? I had been so stupid. Izzy didn't love me after all.
My hand spontaneously reached forward and slapped Izzy hard on the cheek, "What the fuck are you doing here with me if you like Beth Lynn then? Stop wasting your time and get out. Please!" All the fury I had felt in the last few days was spilling out of me and I felt like I really wanted to punch something...or someone.
"Calm down, Amy," Izzy tried to soothe me, "you didn't even let me finish what I was going to say." I was surprised to see that he hadn't even flinched when I had slapped him. Not feeling the least bit sorry for him, I replied, "I don't need to hear what you were going to say. Just get out now. If you give a damn about me, you'll get out now."
Izzy was starting to get angry now too. His gray eyes were cold and his jaw was firm, "Well guess what, Amy? You don't always get to have things your own way. You're gonna listen to what I have to say whether you like it or not." I frowned. Unfortunately, I couldn't really keep Izzy from talking. Reluctantly, I kept my mouth shut and gave him an icy stare.
Izzy relaxed slightly when I didn't protest and then continued, "As I was saying, most guys are going to like Beth Lynn for her physical appearance. No matter what you do, you're never gonna be able to stop that. But the thing is, if a guy actually cares about a woman, he's going to care for her for her personality and not her appearance."
I couldn't really think of anything to say to that so I just waited for Izzy to say something else. I was really still waiting for my apology which I thought I deserved by now. When Izzy didn't speak for a moment, I said a matter-of-factly, "Well, why don't you go and get to know Beth Lynn so you can love her for her personality and not for her appearance, you hypocrite."
"Amy!" Izzy shouted crossly, "I never said I love Beth Lynn, alright? Sure, she's a pretty woman, but I fucking love you, Amy. You and no one else. And about me needing a supermodel for a lover...why, that's bullshit!" Izzy's tone had gotten louder and he was looking like he was ready to murder someone. For the first time, I was a little afraid of Izzy. I didn't ever remember seeing him this angry before. I guess there was a first for everything.
Izzy wasn't done with his rant. He pressed on with his dark eyes shining dangerously, "You don't think I want anything to do with you? Why in the world would I be here with you right now if I didn't want anything to do with you, hm? And you think I don't want to touch you..." Izzy trailed off as his gaze trailed up and down my prone figure lying on the bed next to him.
Without any warning signs, Izzy twisted and rolled over so he was lying on top of me. My breathing quickened as I looked up into his face. Izzy roughly slid a hand next to me and took hold of my lips in between his. I could feel his mouth traveling all over mine. We kissed each other passionately with a fire that couldn't be put out.
Izzy's free hand started traveling all over my body in places he had never dared touch me before. He ran his hand down the curves of my hips and then let it slide under my shirt. I felt him pause on my belly before he shifted my bra and caressed my chest gently. All the while, we were kissing faster and faster until I bit down on Izzy's lower lip. God, I felt like I was going to cum just with him stroking my breasts.
I started to wrap my legs around him...when the door flew open without a knock. A loud, indignant cough sounded from the door. Ugh, we had been so stupid to have left the door slightly ajar and unlocked. Embarrassed at getting caught, Izzy hastily pulled my shirt back down and rolled off of me. My mother stood in the doorway with bright red cheeks and her eyes were glowing devilishly, "What are you two doing? This is my bedroom and my bed. It's not for people having casual sex!"
"We weren't-" I started, been then broke off at my mom's warning look. It told me that it was best to shut up and get out of her room. I grabbed Izzy's hand and started to lead him out of the room and up to my bedroom. My mom snatched my other hand and forced me to come to a stand still, "Don't you think about going upstairs because Beth Lynn is in there. I need you for something, Amy, so I'm afraid you're going to have to say goodbye to your friend now."
I was sure that my mom didn't really need me for anything, she just wanted to get me away from Izzy. She had never even watched a guy kiss me before so our makeout session probably seemed intense to her. Izzy and I paused at the front door and both of us exchanged looks of longing. My mother tapped her foot impatiently behind us. She wasn't in any mood for a long goodbye. Knowing better than to provoke her any more, I said, "Well, thanks for driving me back here, Izzy. Call me, okay?"
Izzy pulled me in a close embrace and kissed my lips in front of my mother. As we embraced, I whispered in his ear, "Don't go off with any other girls where you live...okay?" Izzy cupped my chin in his hands and promised solemnly, "You know I never would. I'll see you soon, okay?" Izzy gave my hand one last squeeze before disappearing through our doorway.
As soon as he was gone, my mom pointed to the couch and stated one word, "Sit." Oh god, this was going to be trouble.