FicWad

“Hey, Anna.” Bob was the first to greet her as she and Gerard entered the bus. Anna gently pulled her hand from Gerard’s as she noticed Bob’s gaze.
Gerard couldn’t help but feel slightly hurt by her actions yet at the same time he wasn’t really ready to answer the questions he knew would be posed when the others realized he and Anna were becoming closer.
“Hey, grab a seat.” Alicia said as she threw herself down on one of the sofas “Are you feeling better?” She had been worrying about Anna since the concert. In her mind she still believed she had seen tears in Anna’s eyes.
“I am feeling much better now.” Anna replied crossing over and taking a seat on the same sofa. When she looked up she saw that Gerard had taken a seat across from them.
“So what did you think of the show?” Frank, who was sitting on the floor in front of the now muted TV, asked.
Anna smiled, “It was perfect. This was not the first time I have seen your band in concert but I must say tonight’s show was definitely one of the best.”
“You’ve seen us before?” Gerard asked.
“Yes.” Anna simply answered. She wanted to tell the truth whenever possible.
Mikey entered and sat down between his wife and Anna. “Well you should have come backstage to meet us.”
Anna laughed, “Do you often allow just anyone backstage?”
“You’re not just anyone.” Mikey said with a frown. “You’re one of our favorite authors.”
“I was not aware of that fact.” Anna reminded him.
“Well fuck.” Mikey said shaking his head, “You definitely are. We’ve all read your stuff.”
“I love all of your books.” Ray said joining in the conversation. “I read the first one and I was hooked.”
Anna was genuinely pleased. “Thank you. To be honest I was shocked when my first book was so well received.”
“Uh, I gotta be honest here.” Alicia said looking sheepish, “I’ve never read any of your books.”
Anna laughed, “Well there goes our friendship.” She teased then realized how good it felt to be comfortable enough with Alicia to speak those words.
Alicia grinned, “Oh, you don’t mean it but I promise I’ll read one.”
Mikey rolled his eyes, “Oh sure. I’ve been trying to get you to read her books for years. Now you’re gonna do it?”
“Of course.” Alicia answered. “Anna is my new best friend. I have to read her books.”
Anna shook her head, “You really do not need to do that.”
“Can I ask a question?” Frank broke into the conversation looking at Anna.
She nodded.
“I was stoked when I heard you wanted to do a book about the band but I’m still kinda confused as to why.”
“I already asked this one.” Alicia grinned.
Anna found herself relaxing around all of them. “She did ask me that earlier and I will tell you the same thing I told her. I wanted a challenge, something that is not expected of me. Writing a non-fiction seemed the best choice.”
“But why us?” Frank asked.
“Why not?” Anna smiled over at him. “I chose to write a book on a band whose music I thoroughly enjoy.”
Gerard sat watching her closely as she answered the questions. In his mind he found himself wondering why her answers seemed a bit practiced. Why was he finding it hard to believe her words?
At that moment Anna glanced over at him. The look on his face concerned her. Was he also questioning her intent?
“So are you just planning on hanging with us?’ Ray asked. “Or are you going to interview us?”
“I would like to spend as much time like we are now as possible. It allows me get to know each of you in a relaxed setting. However, if it is acceptable, I would like to speak to each of you separately but I would really like to stray away from the whole idea of interviews.”
“Because in interviews we give practiced answers.” Gerard said watching her closely.
Anna met his eyes, “Yes. That is true. It is my wish that I will be able to get to know each of you. I want to know how you think and act off the stage.”
“That’s cool.” Bob nodded.
Frank and Ray both voiced their approval.
Mikey joined in, “I like that idea but some shit you will find out about me I might not want to see in print.”
Anna saw Alicia look her way. She understood that Alicia was silently reminding her of what they had discussed earlier.
“Please know it is not my intent to cast any of you in a bad light. I know that inside each of us are things we never want to see in print.”
“Does that include you?” Gerard asked softly.
Anna was momentarily surprised by the question. “Yes and that is why I am considered a recluse.”
“You are.” Gerard quickly agreed. “I don’t believe I’ve ever read an interview you’ve given.”
“Because I have never given an interview.” Anna said locking eyes with him. “I have never done a book signing or had a website.”
“But your fans have set up a lot of those.” Mikey interjected.
Anna nodded, “Yes. I have seen some of them.”
“Do they bother you?” Frank asked.
“No, not really. For the most part they seem to simply discuss my story lines and characters.”
“But a few times I’ve seen where your life is discussed.” Gerard said, “They speculate on your life. If you’re married, how old you are, where you live…”
“Yes. I have seen that happen a few times.” Anna agreed, “I must admit some of the comments I have seen about me are really quite funny. There was one comment, from someone in Texas I believe, who said I was really a man.”
This brought a round of laugher. Gerard shook his head, “Shit, I’m really glad that isn’t the case.” The look he gave Anna conveyed clearly he was referring to what had happened between them on their way to the bus. Anna understood and gave him a smile.
“I saw on one of the sites that someone was convinced you were a witch.” Bob admitted, “Not sure how they came to that conclusion.”
Anna smiled, “Were they implying I practice Wicca?”
Bob grinned, “No, I don’t think so. This poster was really out there. I think they were implying you were a bad witch. Like uh..black magic and shit.”
“Oh” Anna laughed, “It is my guess because some of my writing had dealt with some dark subjects they may have gotten that idea. People do come up with some strange ideas at times.”
“Yeah, just like when they used to say Gee was a vampire.” Mikey said laughing. “That was fucking funny.”
Gerard groaned, “Shit, that rumor went around a long time.”
“That was your own fault.” Ray reminded him. “You and all that dark crap you were so into like bats and shit.”
Gerard nodded then looked over at Anna. He was surprised to see she was no longer smiling. However as soon as she realized he was looking at her the smile on her face reappeared.
“You must admit your look at that time did nothing to dispel the rumors.” She said.
He nodded, “You mean cause I was so pale?”
“If I remember correctly you purposely applied white makeup to appear even paler.”
Frank and Ray both laughed.
“He sure a shit did.” Frank said, “Fuck, it took him longer than any girl I’ve ever known to apply his makeup before a show.”
Gerard was used to the kidding about this but still didn’t want Anna to get the wrong idea. “Hey it was just a look. Like how the fuck could anyone really believe I was a vampire? Fuck, that shit ain’t real.”
Ray laughed, “Come on, Gee. Pale skin, jet black hair, that fuckin’ bat belt buckle, writing all those songs about death….”
Suddenly the bus doors opened and Jamia and Christa walked in. Both had been outside making phone calls.
“What’s everyone laughing about?’ Christa asked as she took a seat next to Ray.
He turned to his wife and explained, “Vampire Gee. We were talking about those old rumors.”
Christa grinned, “Well I can understand them.”
Gerard rolled his eyes. “Just cause of the way I looked?”
“Yes, that’s part of it but I think a lot of the romanticism about vampires was also part of it.”
There was a round of groans from the guys.
Christa ignored them. “Well, it’s true.”
“Oh fuck lets not start talking about this shit.” Frank laughed
Anna looked over at Christa, “You believe there is a romanticism connected to the vampire lore?”
“Oh yes.” Christa answered quickly. “I really do.”
Ray shook his head, “Just cause she loves that old movie with that one actor who played Dracula.”
“Frank Langella.” Christa supplied the name. “Yeah, that’s one of my favorite movies but that’s not why.”
Anna was intrigued by the turn the conversation was taking, “Why then?”
Christa thought a moment. “I think for me it’s the immortality factor. A vampire could find true love that could last forever. Also I think the part about where a vampire can bind another to them by blood ties is so interesting.”
Frank giggled, “Yeah, sure. Blood is so romantic.”
Alicia spoke up. “Hey, I get what she means. It’s romantic to think of a vampire, centuries old, finding someone they want to spend eternity with.”
“You watch too much of that vamp show on HBO.” Mikey kidded her as he placed his arm around her shoulder.
“It’s a great show.” She said narrowing her eyes, “And don’t pretend you don’t watch it too.”
He gave a sheepish grin, “Okay, yeah it’s pretty good.”
“So you do not associate evil with vampirism?” Anna asked looking at Christa.
Christa shook her head, “No, I mean..” Her voice trailed off a minute as she gathered her thoughts, “Okay the guys are gonna make fun of me but here’s my theory. What if vampires really existed but weren’t like the fictional characters?”
As predicted a round of disbelieving comments erupted.
Anna ignored them. “Please go on.” She said keeping her attention only on Christa. She was interested in hearing her thoughts.
“Okay.” Christa smiled, “What if they did but what if they moved among us undetected? What if they were created by the same Maker as the rest of us but for whatever reason were created different. Why then would they all have to be evil? Wouldn’t it be possible for some of them to be good and some bad just like we are?”
“Wait” Gerard said, “Are you saying you really believe vampires exist? And that if they do they aren’t evil?”
Anna glanced over at him briefly then turned her attention back to Christa who explained, “I’m just saying that there are a lot of things in this world we do not understand. I believe there are things in this world many do not see.” She paused then added, “Like the witch thing, for years the word witch brought up all kinds of evil connotations but not now. I have several friends who practice Wicca and they refer to themselves as witches.”
Alicia was becoming very interested in the subject. “But if that was the case why wouldn’t vampires make themselves known like on the show?”
It was Anna who offered an answer, “Do you really believe in today’s world full of unrest and mistrust of anything not considered normal, a race considered supernatural, could make their presence known? Think for a minute before you answer.” She said softly, “Right or wrong most people in this world do not share Christa’s feelings towards the idea of vampires. They are viewed as evil, a work of the devil. I can not believe they would ever be welcomed into society.”
Alicia nodded, “She’s right. Think about how most organized religions would view them? Shit, they would persecute them.”
“Why are we talking about vampires?” Ray asked sounding bored.
“Because it’s an interesting topic.” Christa said giving him a silencing look.
“Yeah, it is.” Frank agreed suddenly, “You know when you stop and think about it anything is really possible. Shit, I believe in ghosts.”
Gerard was once again staring at Anna, “What about you, do you believe in the supernatural?”
Anna thought a moment before answering, “Like Frank I do believe in ghosts. I have a strong belief in the unknown and like Christa I believe there is much in this world that most do not see. Either because they truly do not see it or because they chose not to see it.” She looked directly into his eyes, “Does that surprise you?”
“No.” He answered truthfully, “It doesn’t. There is an air to your writing that seems to point to you having a very open mind about things.” He noticed that the smile Anna gave him seemed to come from deep within. “But vampires? Come on, blood suckers who walk among us? You can’t really believe that shit.”
“I do not believe in any of the horror movie inspired creatures.” Anna answered slowly. “However I do believe there are many things in this world that wither real of fictitious have been deemed evil due to ignorance and hatred.”
Christa, who always felt herself the quiet one, found herself pleased to have started such a lively discussion. “So Anna, I have a question for you.” She waited until Anna looked over then asked, “Say they did exist but had to remain for their own safety unknown, do you think they would be like the fictional characters from books?”
Anna sighed, “You mean afraid of religious objects, garlic, and sunlight?”
Christa nodded, “Yeah,”
Anna answered carefully. “I do not know but if it is as you suggested, that they were created by the same Maker, then why would religious articles offend them? As for garlic and sunlight those things seem rather ridiculous. Sadly human nature usually subscribes to the belief that anything not like itself but be unnatural and therefore evil.”
“Yeah.” Alicia said, “That shit is stuff from the ‘they are evil’ thought process. You know they are evil so they must stay in the dark.”
“True.” Gerard agreed, “But what about the blood? I can’t imagine that part of the vampire persona not being in place. Wouldn’t needing blood, taking it from mortals be evil?”
“If those beings needed blood as humans need food would that make them evil? If the Supreme Being created them with a need for blood to nourish them why would that be evil?”
Frank found the conversation very interesting. “So you believe in God?’ He asked Anna.
“Yes.” She answered without hesitation.
“What about angels?” Alicia asked.
Anna smiled, “Yes, I can honestly say I do.”
“Okay what about werewolves?” Bob asked joining in the conversation.
Christa shrugged, “There are many American Indian legends involving shape shifters. I’ve always believed the idea of werewolves was sorta like those legends.”
“That is true.” Anna nodded, “But I hesitate to believe in beings that are changed simply by the lunar cycle.”
Christa looked over at Anna believing she would understand her feelings more than the others, “I just have always had the feeling there are beings that walk among us that are different. I’ve only shared this story with Ray until now but when I was young I’m sure I saw a ghost in my grandma’s house. She was there one minute then gone in the blink of an eye. I wasn’t scared by her just sorta shocked for a moment. That’s why I’ve always hated the ghost stories that try to make them seem evil. So in my mind if there are ghosts they why not other beings? And if so why would they have to be evil?”
Anna was pleasantly surprised by Christa’s open mindedness. “You have a very intelligent way of looking at the world.”
Christa smiled happily, “Thanks, I know there are some people who just believe the way I think is flaky sometimes.” While she didn’t look over at her husband he understood her comment was directed at him.
“Hey, I never said I didn’t believe you saw a ghost.” He said frowning slightly.
“But you never said you believed me, either.” She said softly.
Gerard wanted to get the conversation back to what they’d been discussing. “But the vampire thing…the blood.”
“What about the blood?” Anna asked.
“Taking it from humans?” He asked. “Ain’t that evil?”
Alicia answered before Anna could. “Not if the mortal offered it willingly.”
“Right.” Mikey said, ‘and they could just take what they need, not drain the person.”
“But would the mortal be bound to the vampire? Do you think that part of the myth would hold true?’ Gerard asked wishing the others would let Anna answer.
Instead of answering she asked the question, “Would it be so terrible if that was true?”
Gerard thought a moment, “Maybe not. Not if the mortal knew that would happen and made the choice.”
Anna found herself in awe of the whole conversation. Never had she imagined she would be speaking about this topic yet the fact that these people were so open minded pleased her beyond words.
It was however Jamia, who had remained silent until now, who brought up a very sobering thought. “Okay so if there were vampires or beings like the vampire myth and they were immortal think how sad that would be.”
All eyes turned to her. It was Anna who asked, “Why do you feel that immortality would be sad?”
Jamia spoke softly, “Well if we are staying with the theory we are discussing then I just think it would be. They would walk amongst us but could never reveal their true nature. They would interact with us, live with us, become friends all the time knowing that we would grow old and die while they would continue on.”
Christa agreed, “That would be hard. Becoming close with people you know will die while you won’t. And what if they did find someone, a mortal; they loved yet that person chose to remain mortal? Think what it would be like to love someone who you knew was going to die but you wouldn’t.”
“Yeah, and what if it was a really deep love?’ Alicia added, “You know a soul mate kinda thing. Shit, going through eternity loving someone who was gone.”
Ray sighed, “You women keep turning this into a romance novel.”
“Just sayin’” Jamia said, “I think immortality would be pretty lonely.”
Suddenly standing Anna offered everyone a smile, “This has been nice but I must go.”
Gerard frowned, “Are you feeling bad again?”
“My headache has returned.” She lied. “And I do have some work I need to catch up on. My newest novel is about to be sent to the publisher and I need to make a few final edits.” She explained to those who hadn’t heard before.
“I’ll walk you back.” Gerard said following her to the door.
Once outside he shivered, “Shit, it’s getting colder.”
Anna turned to him, “Go back in. It is not necessary for you to walk me back to my RV.”
He smiled, “Didn’t say it was necessary. I want to walk you back.”
Anna smiled, “Well thank you.” For several beats they walked in silence. As they neared their destination Gerard reached over and took her hand in his.
“Kind of a weird conversation we had, wasn’t it?’
Anna shook her head, “I enjoyed the conversation. I have always been very interested in things considered supernatural.”
Gerard grinned, “Yeah, me too. So you really believe in ghosts?”
“Yes.” She answered not elaborating any further.
“How about aliens?”
Anna smiled, “I believe humans are not the only intelligent life in the galaxy.”
Gerard grinned, “I agree. How about vampires and werewolves?”
Anna sighed, “Both words describe fictional characters.”
He tightened his hold on her hand and smiled, “I like that you are so open minded about a lot of things.”
“I am.” Anna said glancing over at his face. “Are you?”
Something about the way she asked the question struck him as odd. “Yeah, I think so.”
She looked deeply into his eyes but remained silent.
“Tomorrow when we get to the venue we’ve got to do several interviews but we should be back at our bus a couple of hours before the show.” Suddenly for some reason he just wanted to change the subject back to a more normal tone.
Anna nodded.
He realized he was telling her this because the truth was he wished he could spend the morning with her but he couldn’t because of the band’s schedule. Hell, the way felt right now he wanted to spend ever minute he could with her and while that thought should have frightened him, it didn’t. He had felt dead until she came into his life. Now even though he’d promised himself he’d never allow himself to get close to anyone again he realized that was what was happening. When they reached her RV Anna turned to him.
“I want to thank you for helping me to feel accepted by everyone.”
Her remark surprised him. “I really didn’t do anything.”
“They see that you do not seem to mind my presence and that puts them at ease.”
“Mind your presence?” He repeated. “Oh Sugar, that is an understatement if there ever was one. I’m fuckin’ glad you are here.”
The security lighting allowed her to gaze into his eyes searching for the truth, “Why?’ She asked softly.
The truth came to him but he wasn’t ready to speak the words. This was all happening too fast and yet he felt an urgency to speed up their blossoming relationship that he didn’t understand at all. “Well because.” He said slowly, “You are a beautiful woman who intrigues me.” That was partially true.
“I intrigue you?”
He was at a loss for words. Yeah, she intrigued the hell out of him. She was making him feel things he thought he’d never be able to feel again. Still he wasn’t ready to tell her. Instead he simply nodded.
Anna knew she shouldn’t push him. While time was of the essence it would be a mistake to rush things more than was necessary. “I suppose that is a good thing?”
Gerard nodded again, “Yeah, a very good thing.”
The sound of the diesel engines of the busses roaring to life startled them both. “Shit I gotta get going.” Gerard said talking a step back. “I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.”
“Yes.” Anna nodded then turned.
Suddenly she felt his hand on her shoulder a moment before he spun her around. His lips came down on hers as his arms slid around her waist. Anna was shocked he’d been able to catch her off guard. Just as quickly he dropped his arms and stepped back. “Goodnight.” He whispered.
Her voice was shaky, “Goodnight.”
As he walked back to his bus a frown marred his face. What the hell had that been about? He had decided he wasn’t going to rush things between them but he hadn’t been able to stop himself from kissing her. It was like his thoughts were so different when he was with her. He raised his hand and rubbed his forehead trying to lessen the headache that was now growing stronger. He needed time to think, he knew that. Anna was breaking down all the walls he’d built around him to keep himself safe and suddenly that scared him. At the same time when he was near her it was like he couldn’t think, he could only feel. His head was pounding as he reached the bus.

Claire greeted Anna as soon as she entered. “You are smiling.”
Anna nodded, “Things went well.”
“So they accept that you are writing a book about the band?” Claire asked.
“Yes.” Anna answered as she sat down and kicked off her shoes.
“And you are getting to know them? They are accepting you?”
Once more Anna nodded. “Actually we had a very interesting discussion.”
Claire, who was preparing to take the drivers seat, looked over at her. “Really?”
“We discussed the supernatural.” Anna said softly. As she had expected a look of shock covered Claire’s face.
“The supernatural?”
Anna nodded, “Yes. They are very open-minded. Frank and Christa both admitted they believe in ghosts. I was asked to share my beliefs on God, angles, werewolves and witches.” She saw Claire’s eyes growing wider, “and Christa and Jamia both have very interesting opinions on the topic of immortals.”
“You are of course joking.” Claire said slowly.
Anna shook her head, “No, I am not.”
Claire tried to keep her tone neutral but fear laced her words, “Anna, what are you doing?”
Anna leaned back and closed her eyes, “Do not worry.”
“How can I not worry?” Claire asked feeling her heart begin to race. “You know as well as I what would happen if…”
“Enough.” Anna’s steely tone made Claire flinch. “I do not wish to discuss this any further.”
Claire knew it was best to remain silent, at least for now.
Anna sighed. “Do not worry.” She said again trying to ease Claire’s fears. “I know what I am doing. I am in control.”