Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > I Mean This Forever...
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEE-
I clicked my alarm clock off then let my hand slide off the alarm to just lay there limp off the side of my bed. I buried my face into my pillow, maybe today is a Saturday and I can go to a friend's house or something... I sighed. I knew for a fact that today wasn't Saturday like I'd hoped, in fact it was Thursday...Ugh, great... Time to start another day in fucking Hell. Population, ME. I heard a banging at my door.Fuck. It was my Aunt Hilda? No, maybe my Uncle Bill... For some odd reason, he'd seemed to be taking a great liking to me and I didn't like it one bit... I heard the knocking again and I shot up out of bed and opened the door sleepily. In this house, if you didn't open the door by the time my aunt or uncle knocked for the third set of knocks, you got licks. And in my case, the licks were beatings.
I looked sleepily at my uncle. He was a fat fucking slob that made me sick. He had a Elvis Presley haircut and it looked ridiculous on him. His gray hair is what threw it off and the fact that he had an almost pinkish skin color, made him look odd. He had a beer gut and almost all of his lounging shirts he had,had at least some sort of stain on it, wether it was blood or beer. He was about five foot seven and that made him about a good three or four inches taller than me. His hands looked like meat pattys with sausage links as fingers and I was surprised that he could manage to do anything with them. His legs were just simply fat, there's no other way to describe them without being repulsed...
He was already in his cop uniform,great.. Now he's going to fucking pull his gun on me if I don't listen or do what my aunt says before he leaves... He smiled at me then said in his gruff permanently drunken voice," Well morin' there little miss sunshine", he looked down at my breast and smiled," Ahhhh, well lookie at what we have here! Someone is perky this morning." He grabbed my breast then winked. I pulled away as fast as I could then covered myself. My mouth dropped in the process. What the fuck was that?! He's never done anything like that to me before! He smiled more," You know you're aunt used to be a fighter like you, I like that in a woman." he stared at my body and it made me feel sick, repulsed and I thought I was going to cry and puke at the same time. "Go get ready for school, it's 5:15 now. you're walking so you're ass needs to be out of here by 6 o'clock. If you're not, so help me god, I'll fucking beat you're ass to where you wish you'd never been born." He looked at where my hands were still covering my breast then smiled again and walked out.
I slammed my door shut then grabbed a big baggy Pink Floyd tee and a pair of jeans then rushed to the bathroom hoping I was unnoticed. I showered quickly and then dried off and slipped my bra, underwear, and shirt on. I looked down at my wrist and looked at the numerous cuts on them. For every hit I took, it felt like there was a cut. I was never good enough for them so on top of what they did to me, I hurt myself. I didn't know how else to deal with it but what I did worked. Sure, I was killing myself, but so are they. I then moved down to my legs, this was then new spot I had to use because there wasn't much left that I could cut. I only did it on the base of my wrist up high enough that wristbands could cover and those things are my best friends. I counted the cuts on my legs, only four on each, that was good for me in one day. I picked up my pants and slid them on. I brushed my jet black hair quickly then left it down. Luckily, I had straight hair, so I never had to do much with it if I ever needed a quick fix. I stared at myself in the mirror. I guess I'm pretty... That is of course if you like the average height woman that weighted barely 120 pounds because she never gained much weight. I fit in a size zero in pants and I always wear baggy clothes because I don't want people to ask questions. Another reason is my breast, they're average size also, but at my school, almost everyone,seriously everyone was flat chested. The last thing I needed was male attention... My aunt already thinks I'm a whore. I looked at my face... It was heart shaped and needless to say, it had very distinct features. I had soft blue eyes with tidy tweezed eyebrows. My nose was sort of small in my family but that would make it normal to everyone else. My lips were a bright pink and were plump and looked perfect for kissing.
Then the feeling hit me again, like a stab to my heart. I closed my eyes and could my father's voice in my head saying," My beautiful baby Alice, one day you're going to grow up and be the most beautiful woman in the world. You're smart, and cuddly and a great kid. I love you baby." I opened my eyes and saw tears streaming down my cheeks. I quickly wiped them away then picked up my towel. The bathroom was an ugly off white and so small I could barely move around it. I threw the towel on the toilet top quickly then brushed my teeth. After I finished brushing my teeth, I rushed to my room and looked at the clock. It was 5:55 am, I needed to leave now. I grabbed my black back pack quickly then grabbed my sneakers quickly and ran out the door walking beginning to walk to my school. I always keep and extra pair of socks in my bag, they're right next to my razor...
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When I got to school, it looked as if it was going to start pouring down rain but then again, it always did in this sad little town of Newark, New Jersey. I walked onto the campus and of course, who's the first to see me, but the preps. I felt a serge of pain in my side from where I had gotten thrown into glass in the backyard the other night and then I'd noticed that someone threw something at me. I held back a scream and the tears that wanted to burst out of my eyes. I had never gone to the doctor, so not all of the glass was out and I think they'd just hit where a big chunk was buried under my flesh into the muscle. I ignored the laughing I heard from everyone that saw and just kept walking.
The courtyard in our school was huge, but the big gate surrounding campus made it seem like a prison if anything. It looked depressing and run down, but then again this was the only high school in our town that was left open. I looked at the grass and noticed there was some color to it, what a surprise, it's always dead. There's was graffiti on the sides of the buildings marking each gang's territory and I did my best to make sure to not make eye contact with anyone. If you ever looked at the wrong person in the eyes, you could get stabbed or killed here, this wasn't some top notch school where everything is happy-go-lucky. Our school had two stories and my friend's were smart and were on the patio of the second floor. I found my way to the stairs then climbed up them. About halfway up, a druggie stropped and asked if I had drugs.Wow... I guess I do look that pale and miserable... After what seemed like ages of walking and stair-climbing I reached my friends. They were all smiling and honestly the only thing that's kept me sane since the abuse from my family has gotten worse.
I set my bag down and smiled a little, it was nice to see friendly faces. I sat next to Marcuss and rolled my eyes once I heard what he was talking about. Marcuss was the group pervert and all he really knew how to talk about and be funny was with, you guessed it...sex. He was a tall gangly looking boy that was six-foot even. His facial features seemed like a foxes and he had brown eyes. He was a senior at our school but he should have graduated last year but he skipped school way too much. He had olive skin and jet black hair like mine. The difference between me and him though clothing wise was that he was into the more trippy techno colored shirts and I just stuck with my black. He did love to wear long baggy pants that had chains on the side and we all think he has a fetish for them....
Next was Katy. She was wilder and crazier than me and I loved her with all my heart. She was five foot five and overweight. she had dark brown hair and beautiful hazel eyes. She loved wearing anything rainbow she could get her hands on. Today she had on her rainbow colored tennis shoes and her usual black jacket and black shirt with a pair of jeans. Her face reminded me of that giant marshmallow guy on the tire commercials but I thought it was adorable. She came up to me and hugged me then looked at Marcuss angrily." Why is it that whenever Alice is around Marcuss, you never shut up about sex?! It's fucking gross!" I laughed a little.
Marcuss turned away and began to pout and talk to everyone else who honestly I didn't know but they were close with Katy so I couldn't complain. I sighed then sat on the concrete slab that was supposed to serve as a miniature wall. I started zoning out into my own little world when suddenly, I felt someone tugging at my shirt and whispering something in my ear I couldn't quite make out then I felt it on my other side too but I hear the other voice very distinctly. It was saying," Oh yeah baby, I heard that you like to take you're clothes off for all the older men down at the whore house... Why don't you take em off for me and I'll show you what a real man's touch and fuck is like." I turned around and smacked the one on my left as hard as I could, though it wasn't in reality that hard but it was enough to get the point across. The guy covered where his face would have been but I couldn't see it, he had a hood on and I couldn't see his face. The other one turned me around it was the same deal. They were both taller than me and in matching dark blue hoodies. The second guy slapped me then yelled in a sort of high pitched voice," So! The bitch is a fighter huh? lets give her a reason to fucking be a fighter!"
All of a sudden out of no where, I heard someone call," Leave her alone." I saw a black figure walk up then turn them around and in an almost cynical way stated," She didn't do anything to you two pricks so why don't you fucking go back home and find better costumes to play 'Boogeyman' in because those aren't scary. Now if you know what's good for you, you'll turn around and leave. Now."
I clicked my alarm clock off then let my hand slide off the alarm to just lay there limp off the side of my bed. I buried my face into my pillow, maybe today is a Saturday and I can go to a friend's house or something... I sighed. I knew for a fact that today wasn't Saturday like I'd hoped, in fact it was Thursday...Ugh, great... Time to start another day in fucking Hell. Population, ME. I heard a banging at my door.Fuck. It was my Aunt Hilda? No, maybe my Uncle Bill... For some odd reason, he'd seemed to be taking a great liking to me and I didn't like it one bit... I heard the knocking again and I shot up out of bed and opened the door sleepily. In this house, if you didn't open the door by the time my aunt or uncle knocked for the third set of knocks, you got licks. And in my case, the licks were beatings.
I looked sleepily at my uncle. He was a fat fucking slob that made me sick. He had a Elvis Presley haircut and it looked ridiculous on him. His gray hair is what threw it off and the fact that he had an almost pinkish skin color, made him look odd. He had a beer gut and almost all of his lounging shirts he had,had at least some sort of stain on it, wether it was blood or beer. He was about five foot seven and that made him about a good three or four inches taller than me. His hands looked like meat pattys with sausage links as fingers and I was surprised that he could manage to do anything with them. His legs were just simply fat, there's no other way to describe them without being repulsed...
He was already in his cop uniform,great.. Now he's going to fucking pull his gun on me if I don't listen or do what my aunt says before he leaves... He smiled at me then said in his gruff permanently drunken voice," Well morin' there little miss sunshine", he looked down at my breast and smiled," Ahhhh, well lookie at what we have here! Someone is perky this morning." He grabbed my breast then winked. I pulled away as fast as I could then covered myself. My mouth dropped in the process. What the fuck was that?! He's never done anything like that to me before! He smiled more," You know you're aunt used to be a fighter like you, I like that in a woman." he stared at my body and it made me feel sick, repulsed and I thought I was going to cry and puke at the same time. "Go get ready for school, it's 5:15 now. you're walking so you're ass needs to be out of here by 6 o'clock. If you're not, so help me god, I'll fucking beat you're ass to where you wish you'd never been born." He looked at where my hands were still covering my breast then smiled again and walked out.
I slammed my door shut then grabbed a big baggy Pink Floyd tee and a pair of jeans then rushed to the bathroom hoping I was unnoticed. I showered quickly and then dried off and slipped my bra, underwear, and shirt on. I looked down at my wrist and looked at the numerous cuts on them. For every hit I took, it felt like there was a cut. I was never good enough for them so on top of what they did to me, I hurt myself. I didn't know how else to deal with it but what I did worked. Sure, I was killing myself, but so are they. I then moved down to my legs, this was then new spot I had to use because there wasn't much left that I could cut. I only did it on the base of my wrist up high enough that wristbands could cover and those things are my best friends. I counted the cuts on my legs, only four on each, that was good for me in one day. I picked up my pants and slid them on. I brushed my jet black hair quickly then left it down. Luckily, I had straight hair, so I never had to do much with it if I ever needed a quick fix. I stared at myself in the mirror. I guess I'm pretty... That is of course if you like the average height woman that weighted barely 120 pounds because she never gained much weight. I fit in a size zero in pants and I always wear baggy clothes because I don't want people to ask questions. Another reason is my breast, they're average size also, but at my school, almost everyone,seriously everyone was flat chested. The last thing I needed was male attention... My aunt already thinks I'm a whore. I looked at my face... It was heart shaped and needless to say, it had very distinct features. I had soft blue eyes with tidy tweezed eyebrows. My nose was sort of small in my family but that would make it normal to everyone else. My lips were a bright pink and were plump and looked perfect for kissing.
Then the feeling hit me again, like a stab to my heart. I closed my eyes and could my father's voice in my head saying," My beautiful baby Alice, one day you're going to grow up and be the most beautiful woman in the world. You're smart, and cuddly and a great kid. I love you baby." I opened my eyes and saw tears streaming down my cheeks. I quickly wiped them away then picked up my towel. The bathroom was an ugly off white and so small I could barely move around it. I threw the towel on the toilet top quickly then brushed my teeth. After I finished brushing my teeth, I rushed to my room and looked at the clock. It was 5:55 am, I needed to leave now. I grabbed my black back pack quickly then grabbed my sneakers quickly and ran out the door walking beginning to walk to my school. I always keep and extra pair of socks in my bag, they're right next to my razor...
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When I got to school, it looked as if it was going to start pouring down rain but then again, it always did in this sad little town of Newark, New Jersey. I walked onto the campus and of course, who's the first to see me, but the preps. I felt a serge of pain in my side from where I had gotten thrown into glass in the backyard the other night and then I'd noticed that someone threw something at me. I held back a scream and the tears that wanted to burst out of my eyes. I had never gone to the doctor, so not all of the glass was out and I think they'd just hit where a big chunk was buried under my flesh into the muscle. I ignored the laughing I heard from everyone that saw and just kept walking.
The courtyard in our school was huge, but the big gate surrounding campus made it seem like a prison if anything. It looked depressing and run down, but then again this was the only high school in our town that was left open. I looked at the grass and noticed there was some color to it, what a surprise, it's always dead. There's was graffiti on the sides of the buildings marking each gang's territory and I did my best to make sure to not make eye contact with anyone. If you ever looked at the wrong person in the eyes, you could get stabbed or killed here, this wasn't some top notch school where everything is happy-go-lucky. Our school had two stories and my friend's were smart and were on the patio of the second floor. I found my way to the stairs then climbed up them. About halfway up, a druggie stropped and asked if I had drugs.Wow... I guess I do look that pale and miserable... After what seemed like ages of walking and stair-climbing I reached my friends. They were all smiling and honestly the only thing that's kept me sane since the abuse from my family has gotten worse.
I set my bag down and smiled a little, it was nice to see friendly faces. I sat next to Marcuss and rolled my eyes once I heard what he was talking about. Marcuss was the group pervert and all he really knew how to talk about and be funny was with, you guessed it...sex. He was a tall gangly looking boy that was six-foot even. His facial features seemed like a foxes and he had brown eyes. He was a senior at our school but he should have graduated last year but he skipped school way too much. He had olive skin and jet black hair like mine. The difference between me and him though clothing wise was that he was into the more trippy techno colored shirts and I just stuck with my black. He did love to wear long baggy pants that had chains on the side and we all think he has a fetish for them....
Next was Katy. She was wilder and crazier than me and I loved her with all my heart. She was five foot five and overweight. she had dark brown hair and beautiful hazel eyes. She loved wearing anything rainbow she could get her hands on. Today she had on her rainbow colored tennis shoes and her usual black jacket and black shirt with a pair of jeans. Her face reminded me of that giant marshmallow guy on the tire commercials but I thought it was adorable. She came up to me and hugged me then looked at Marcuss angrily." Why is it that whenever Alice is around Marcuss, you never shut up about sex?! It's fucking gross!" I laughed a little.
Marcuss turned away and began to pout and talk to everyone else who honestly I didn't know but they were close with Katy so I couldn't complain. I sighed then sat on the concrete slab that was supposed to serve as a miniature wall. I started zoning out into my own little world when suddenly, I felt someone tugging at my shirt and whispering something in my ear I couldn't quite make out then I felt it on my other side too but I hear the other voice very distinctly. It was saying," Oh yeah baby, I heard that you like to take you're clothes off for all the older men down at the whore house... Why don't you take em off for me and I'll show you what a real man's touch and fuck is like." I turned around and smacked the one on my left as hard as I could, though it wasn't in reality that hard but it was enough to get the point across. The guy covered where his face would have been but I couldn't see it, he had a hood on and I couldn't see his face. The other one turned me around it was the same deal. They were both taller than me and in matching dark blue hoodies. The second guy slapped me then yelled in a sort of high pitched voice," So! The bitch is a fighter huh? lets give her a reason to fucking be a fighter!"
All of a sudden out of no where, I heard someone call," Leave her alone." I saw a black figure walk up then turn them around and in an almost cynical way stated," She didn't do anything to you two pricks so why don't you fucking go back home and find better costumes to play 'Boogeyman' in because those aren't scary. Now if you know what's good for you, you'll turn around and leave. Now."
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