Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > The Chronicles of Violet Tendencies
March 4
Shad’s took me to the mall today. We both had off work, and he just got paid. We really shouldn’t have, even with five different people living in one house, we never have enough money to go around. But he did. He said he wanted to talk, and when Shads wants to talk I will always listen. So we went, and M. Shadows bought me the most amazing purple and yellow sundress, and it fits me like a glove. It was really a good day. That is, until Shads decided it was talk time. Three guesses on what he wanted to talk about. It’ll take you a couple.
“So, what do you think of Marie.” I spit the soda I was drinking all across the inside of his windshield. What did I think of that bitch? I told him: she’s pathetic, annoying, she has no ass or tits, and she hangs on Zacky like a fucking plague. I want to shove her face through a wall. And I can’t do a damn thing about it, which makes it worse. And then Shads laughed at me, which kindda pissed me off at him too. I love him, and would never even think of raising my voice to him, but I was ready to smack him. I told him that, and he laughed more.
“Little sister, I love you. But you have no idea what you are doing.” I pressed him for what he meant, but he claimed up as if I was the one to bring this up. I almost broke him down, I was using the I’m-your-best-friend-and-baby-sister-and-you-will-tell-me-anything-I-want voice, when we pulled into the driveway. And saw the crowd of our fellow housemates all standing outside. Marie was there, too, and she was crying. Zacky had his arm around her shoulder, clearly attempting to comfort her. I wanted to hurl, she was so fake she made my teeth hurt. But then I heard Shads gasp and looked at what they all were looking at.
The entire back end of my car had been smashed in. By Marie’s car. I was out of that car, and had Marie ripped away from Zacky before anyone even knew we had made it home. I made a fist, ready to swing, but fucking Syn grabbed it, shouting at me what the hell was I thinking, or doing, or whatever. I was going to beat her face in for fucking up my car, of course. And then she did what I didn’t expect. She apologized to me, telling me I had every right to hit her. She admitted she had fucked up my car, though she professed she didn’t mean to do it.
“She better fucking not.”The first words Zacky spoke to me since our fight, and he does it defending this little bitch? I went off on him.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING, ZACKY VENGEANCE? YOU ACT LIKE MARIE IS SOME SORT OF SAINT. SHE HANGS ON YOUR EVERY BREATH AND BEFORE YOU COULDN’T BE BOTHERED TO PAY ATTENTION. NOW YOU ACT LIKE SHE IS… WELL, ME! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT! I THOUGHT I MATTERED!”
Before he had a chance to respond I ran. With my car currently still being united with Marie’s, I couldn’t leave the house. But I could lock myself in my bedroom and then crank my iPod until I couldn’t hear them banging on the door so hard it almost came down. And I cried. I’ll tell you that, because no one will ever know I have the ability to cry. It hurts, to see her with him. Not because I want him, but because I don’t want HER with him. Or maybe I do want him.
It doesn’t matter what I want, what matters is what is best for Zacky. And I know Marie isn’t what is good for him. He needs to understand that. I think he does, I think he just doesn’t care, or he knows Marie is the one who will piss me off the most. How is that fair for me
I only want what I can’t have.
Her royal highness, the supreme empress of the universe,
Violet Tendencies.
Shad’s took me to the mall today. We both had off work, and he just got paid. We really shouldn’t have, even with five different people living in one house, we never have enough money to go around. But he did. He said he wanted to talk, and when Shads wants to talk I will always listen. So we went, and M. Shadows bought me the most amazing purple and yellow sundress, and it fits me like a glove. It was really a good day. That is, until Shads decided it was talk time. Three guesses on what he wanted to talk about. It’ll take you a couple.
“So, what do you think of Marie.” I spit the soda I was drinking all across the inside of his windshield. What did I think of that bitch? I told him: she’s pathetic, annoying, she has no ass or tits, and she hangs on Zacky like a fucking plague. I want to shove her face through a wall. And I can’t do a damn thing about it, which makes it worse. And then Shads laughed at me, which kindda pissed me off at him too. I love him, and would never even think of raising my voice to him, but I was ready to smack him. I told him that, and he laughed more.
“Little sister, I love you. But you have no idea what you are doing.” I pressed him for what he meant, but he claimed up as if I was the one to bring this up. I almost broke him down, I was using the I’m-your-best-friend-and-baby-sister-and-you-will-tell-me-anything-I-want voice, when we pulled into the driveway. And saw the crowd of our fellow housemates all standing outside. Marie was there, too, and she was crying. Zacky had his arm around her shoulder, clearly attempting to comfort her. I wanted to hurl, she was so fake she made my teeth hurt. But then I heard Shads gasp and looked at what they all were looking at.
The entire back end of my car had been smashed in. By Marie’s car. I was out of that car, and had Marie ripped away from Zacky before anyone even knew we had made it home. I made a fist, ready to swing, but fucking Syn grabbed it, shouting at me what the hell was I thinking, or doing, or whatever. I was going to beat her face in for fucking up my car, of course. And then she did what I didn’t expect. She apologized to me, telling me I had every right to hit her. She admitted she had fucked up my car, though she professed she didn’t mean to do it.
“She better fucking not.”The first words Zacky spoke to me since our fight, and he does it defending this little bitch? I went off on him.
“WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU THINKING, ZACKY VENGEANCE? YOU ACT LIKE MARIE IS SOME SORT OF SAINT. SHE HANGS ON YOUR EVERY BREATH AND BEFORE YOU COULDN’T BE BOTHERED TO PAY ATTENTION. NOW YOU ACT LIKE SHE IS… WELL, ME! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT! I THOUGHT I MATTERED!”
Before he had a chance to respond I ran. With my car currently still being united with Marie’s, I couldn’t leave the house. But I could lock myself in my bedroom and then crank my iPod until I couldn’t hear them banging on the door so hard it almost came down. And I cried. I’ll tell you that, because no one will ever know I have the ability to cry. It hurts, to see her with him. Not because I want him, but because I don’t want HER with him. Or maybe I do want him.
It doesn’t matter what I want, what matters is what is best for Zacky. And I know Marie isn’t what is good for him. He needs to understand that. I think he does, I think he just doesn’t care, or he knows Marie is the one who will piss me off the most. How is that fair for me
I only want what I can’t have.
Her royal highness, the supreme empress of the universe,
Violet Tendencies.
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