FicWad

He wasn’t sure how long they sat there before she fell asleep and he eventually closed his eyes with her, as the events of the day crashed upon him in exhaustion. He felt her shift as she clung to him and he opened his eyes to see George pulling out an injection from her arm.

George nodded and Elliot knew what it meant. Shifting slowly she curled closer to him and he reveled in her warmth. He wrapped her into him, got his legs beneath him and lifted her gently from the ground. Her arms entwined themselves around his neck and he moved to the bed. George arranged the pillows and blankets and then Elliot laid her down. She reluctantly released her hold on him, opening her eyes lazily.

“You’re okay, just sleep,” he whispered to her as he took her hands within his and laid them on the blanket. Pulling the blanket up to her chin, she shifted, turning on her side and seemed to drift off.

It physically hurt to step back, to stop touching her and he stared down at her, scared that she was going to awaken in a panic again and he wouldn’t be there.

“Elliot,” George called to him quietly.

Elliot reluctantly left her side and moved to meet George across the room.

“Nice job,” George complimented.

“I guess I picked up a few things watching her over the years,” Elliot said as he stretched his back. “What did you give her?”

“It is a neural inhibitor,” George explained. ‘It should allow her to sleep without nightmares or broken REM sleep.”

“It won’t interact with the drugs in her system,” Elliot asked wary of introducing more drugs into her system.

“It shouldn’t,” George replied as Elliot looked at him in annoyance. “Look it is our best option right now. One of the main challenges we are facing are the drugs interaction with her mind. Sleep depravation is not allowing her body to process and expel the drug as it normally would.”

“So it will help?”

“Hopefully,” George replied and Elliot turned in utter frustration. “There is no way to be sure, but at this point it is our best option.”

Elliot absorbed the information and nodded in agreement. His mind cleared as the circumstances surrounding their current situation came flooding back to him. They still needed to find the bastard who did this.

“I need you to see something.” he said before looking back to Olivia. She was peacefully still and for the moment, he could breathe again.

Elliot led him out into the main corridor, looking for Cragen. He didn’t even know what time it was and or if Cragen was still there. He heard his CO a few feet away talking to two uniformed officers.

“Once they move her to a private room I want armed guards outside 24/7. For now stand outside the ER, make sure you check everyone that isn’t a doctor or escorted by a doctor going in or out,” Cragen ordered before walking toward them.

“How’s she doing?”

“Better,” George replied as Elliot saw the envelope in his hand before he handed George a set of gloves.

“What’re these for?”

Elliot nodded to the envelope as Cragen held it out for him to take. George put the gloves on and then took the envelope from Cragen. Thankfully, he turned away from them to look at the photo’s, as Elliot wasn’t sure is he could stomach them again.

“What do you think, Doc?” Cragen asked as George turned back to them

“Besides the obvious?”

“That he’s a sick fuck? Yeah,” Elliot growled.

“These pictures aren’t random. They were specifically chosen to instill fear. He or she knows that Olivia isn’t going to see these.”

“Explain,” Cragen prodded and Elliot could feel a heated anger rising in his chest

“They aren’t meant for her, they were meant for the person they knew would be here with her. I would say they were meant for you, Elliot.”

*

She continued to sleep soundly allowing Elliot to focus on finding answers. Andrews arrived with the list of parolee’s. They went through the list while George oversaw Olivia’s move to a private room.

“This is pointless,” Elliot finally said as he tossed his list to the side.

“Unfortunately I would have to agree,” Cragen sighed.

“So what’s our next move,” Andrews asked.

“What about CSU, have they come back with anything yet?” Elliot asked as he leaned into the chair stretching his back.

“We just got the report,” Fin said as he walked into the room with Munch.

“How is she?” Munch asked.

“They’re moving her into a private room as we speak. She’s sleeping at the moment ,” Cragen replied as Elliot got out of his seat taking the report from Fin. “What did they find?”

“They’re still finishing, but basically every piece of food and or drink in Olivia’s apartment was laced with an unknown toxin.”

“Unknown, what does that mean?” Cragen asked.

“It means whatever it is, it’s synthetic and a bitch to track,” Munch added. “Lab is still working on it.”

“Do we have any idea how much of this stuff Olivia was exposed to?” Cragen asked as Elliot began to pace. His mind was reeling, searching for some kind of clue as to who was doing this.

“It’s hard to tell, given the expiration dates on the perishable items I would say probably about two weeks,” Fin answered.

“Two weeks? How the hell has this guy been poisoning her for two weeks,” Elliot exploded. “How did he get into her apartment or contaminated her food without her noticing?”

“The drug is odorless, tasteless and if we weren’t looking for it we would have never found it,” Munch replied as he handed a vile to Cragen.

“We need to get this to Huang,” Cragen said as he turned and exited the room.

“Elliot, we are gonna catch this bastard,” Fin said.

“We should already have the guy! What are you guy’s doing,” Elliot blared. “She’s completely helpless and you have a vile and a nameless toxin. We’ve got nothing, no suspects, no prints, no leads we have jack shit!”

The two men remained silent until Elliot cleared the anger from his system. When he finally finished he turned back to his two comrades re opening the CSU file.

“We’re going to find him,” Munch repeated.

“I know.”

“Elliot,” he heard, and looked up to see Kathy coming toward them.

“Kathy?” Elliot said as his heart skipped a beat.

…the pictures were meant for you Elliot…

“What’s wrong are the kids okay?”

“Yeah we’re all fine, El. Andrews told me about Olivia when I called looking for you,” she explained seeing Munch and Fin. “Hey guy’s”

“Hey Kathy,” they both replied and then turned to give the ex-couple some privacy.

“Is she okay?” she immediately asked and Elliot felt himself hardening. “What happened?”

“We’re not sure,” Elliot said as he pulled a chair out for her and they both sat down.

“What does that mean?”

“We think she was poisoned.”

“Oh God, is she okay?”

“She’s sleeping,” Elliot replied trying to keep his cool. He appreciated that Kathy was there but it was unnerving at the same time. He felt constricted and he rose from the chair turning away from her.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah I’m fine,” Elliot immediately replied hearing the resentment in his own voice. “I’m fine.”

“Elliot,” Kathy started as she walked up beside him and touched his arm. “She’s going to be okay.”

“I know, she’s strong,” Elliot replied with a nod refusing to look at her. “She’s going to be fine.”

“Elliot, look at me,” she insisted turning him around as he continued to look away from her.

“I know that you, we, aren’t good at this,” she said to him. “You have to know that I would never want anything to happen to Olivia.”

“I know, Kath.”

“I know how much she means to you,” she said with kind understanding eyes. “You’re both going to get through this.”

Elliot stared into her familiar eyes. He didn’t see any resentment or hostility like he used to when it came to Olivia. He only saw genuine concern and worry.

“Thanks,” he said and she pulled him into a hug.

“Call me if you need anything okay,” Kathy said as she pulled away from him and turned toward the door. “I’ll let the kids know you love them.”

“Thanks,” he replied.

“Anytime,” Kathy replied with a smile before she walked out of the small area.

Elliot turned back to the window. His thoughts drifted from Kathy to Liv. They’d always both been important in his life. His life with Kathy was one of the responsibilities and family, caring and love.

When he met Liv, eleven years ago, he’d had no idea how it would change him. She’d become his source of strength, his conscious, his heart. She’d supported any decision he made, whether he was right or not. She called him out when he was being an ass. She r him when he’d done enough. Somehow through the years she’d become a part of him. He couldn’t imagine his life without seeing her, talking to her, or laughing with her.

Maybe it was the hell they’d lived through. All the pain and devastation they saw everyday. When it came to the hesitation, the anger, and the nightmares they’d always had each other. They had shared the experiences that all of those doubts and fears stemmed from. Now this drug, this person, was forcing her to face all the nightmares without the solace of daylight, without him.

He knew this guy, t person who was doing this. He’d met them, perhaps even spoken to them. Elliot had searched his mind, since he found her. Rethinking every case, every suspect, every victim and he couldn’t find it. He couldn’t find the link to what was happening, to who would want to hurt her or them.

Cragen broke his chain of thought as he walked back into the room.

“Was that Kathy?” he asked as he looked at the papers stacked on the table before them.

“Yeah,” Elliot replied while rubbing the back of his neck. “Andrews told her about Liv.”

“I put a detail on the house, just in case.”

“Thanks.”

“You need to sleep, Elliot.”

“No, I need to find this guy before he tries something else,” Elliot replied as he took a seat at the table. He grabbed copies of the pictures. His stomach clenched, as he looked them over again. Laying them out on the table individually Cragen stepped to the side looking at them as well.

“Who is this guy,” Elliot said with a deep sigh. “How did he get so close without her noticing?”

“We got a hit on the toxin,” Fin announced as he and Munch entered the room.

“What’d you get?” Cragen asked as Elliot looked up from the table.

“Toxin is called Beta29, produced by Waxlan Pharmaceuticals.”

“Talk to Waxlan see if you can get a list of distributers.”

“Already have, they’re sending a list of buyers now.”

“Good get on it. Elliot,” Cragen said as Munch and Fin exited. “If you aren’t going to sleep then why don’t you go to Olivia’s apartment and get her some clothes. Huang said that when she wakes up we need to make her as comfortable as possible.”

Elliot nodded in agreement, as he rose from the chair.

“Oh, and I put a call in to Simon but I haven’t heard back.”

“What are you going to tell him?”

“As little as possible.”

Elliot left the small room and headed to Olivia’s room down the hall. He looked through the window, and saw she was still sleeping peacefully. He turned from the window and George looked up from his seat behind the nurse's desk.

“How is she?” Elliot asked forcing himself to walk toward George instead of into the room and straight to Olivia.

“She’s better. Now that we know what she’s been poisoned with we can work on how to get it out of her system.”

“Is she going to be asleep for a while?”

“Yeah, she’ll be out for at least the next few hours.”

“Cragen suggested I go to her apartment and bring back some of her things?”

“Yeah, definitely,” George replied with a nod. “Anything you think will make her comfortable.”

“Okay I’ll be back. Call me if anything changes,” Elliot replied before he turned to look at her once more. With a deep breath and a small prayer, he walked away.

*

Elliot arrived on the fifth floor of her building and saw the familiar door. He used the key she’d given him so many years ago. He unlocked the door and walked in. It was strange to be in her living room without her. He half expected her to walk around the corner smiling at him. He checked his phone to make sure the ringer was on, when he remembered the battery was dead. She had the same phone, and he was pretty sure she left the charger by her bed.

He passed the broken vase of flowers and thought of that morning. He’d thought for a second that she was going to be okay.

He entered the bedroom, and took in the space. It was fairly feminine, which, for some reason, surprised him. The walls were a very light purple with pictures of lilacs and heather throughout the room. The bed, covered in a fluffy white comforter with dark violet and green accent pillows looked comfortable to his tired body.

He checked the bedside table for the charging cord, and he saw it before he walked to the table. He moved a book out of the way, and plugged in his phone. He glanced at the book he’d moved. He picked it up to examine it as he took a seat on the bed. ‘The Bancroft Strategy’ by Robert Ludlum.

Elliot chuckled to himself before placing the book on the bedside table where he found it. He sat there for a moment in silence, letting his mind breathe.

Okay let’s do this Stabler.

He walked to her closet and opened the door. It was filled with clothes he sighed in anxiety.

How the hell am I supposed to know what would make her comfortable?

Maybe because she’s been your partner for eleven years?

Yeah, like that had given him any clue.

He searched through the clothes not finding anything that struck him as comfortable. He swung the door to close it, when he noticed a sweatshirt hanging off a hook. He pulled it off the hook and realized it was his. His mind flashed back to the moment he’d given it to her. They’d been talking out on his stoop. He couldn’t recall the exact day or the case, but he remembered her sitting with him shivering.

It’d been in the early fall so the day had been warm. After the sun went down the infamous New York winds kicked up, sending a chill up the spine of the city. He remembered running up to his apartment and grabbing a sweatshirt for her to wear home. They’d talked for a while after that, she’d gone home, and he’d forgotten about the sweatshirt until now.

He sat on the bed, the sweatshirt in his hand. He stared at it and hesitantly wondered if she’d worn it since then. If it had just been hanging, forgotten in her closet. The thought hurt him for an unknown reason, and he struggled with the unexpected reaction. He rose from the bed as he pushed it down into his gut. He went to her dresser. Finding sweat pants, a few t-shirts, socks and unmentionables he grabbed random items and put them into a bag.

Next was the bathroom. He collected her hairbrush and tooth brush as he heard the phone beep. He lifted the sweatshirt from the bed before he reached for the phone unplugging it. As he did the phone beeped which he expected. Lord knew how many calls he’d missed in the past few hours. He had four voice messages, and the text message icon popped up. He headed toward the apartment door. He grabbed the afghan off the couch and threw it over his shoulder before he opened the text.

She wears your sweatshirt every night.

Elliot stopped cold and immediately scanned the room before walking to the window. He saw nothing. He dropped the bag and the blanket. He checked the shelves, the walls and then looked up at the ceiling fan.

Nothing.

The phone beeped again.

Elliot opened the new message. He saw a picture of Olivia sleeping in her hospital bed. A chill went up his spine. He grabbed the needed items and headed toward the door.

He knows where she is….he’s watching her…

As Elliot closed the door, the phone beeped again.

Elliot opened the message.

Give Olivia a kiss from me…

He was going to kill him. When he found the bastard, he was going to kill him.

Elliot’s mind ran as he tried to pinpoint the exact location of the camera in her room. The image of the faceless bastard standing that close to her…

He furiously dialed George’s number, cursing as the phone rang. His phone beeped and Elliot looked at it.

Call failed, retry?

His mind was a whirl of panic and anger. He couldn’t breathe as he threw the items in the passenger seat and started the car.

Elliot hit the redial button as he watched the screen and pulled onto the street.

The phone blared at him again and he looked to the phone.

Call failed no signal.

According to the phone, his signal was strong. He kept dialing, choosing different numbers praying for one to connect. He realized the fucker must’ve been using a signal blocker he sped up trying to get out of range.

“Fin,” Elliot yelled into the phone when someone finally answered. “Where are you?”

“Walking into the hospital.”

“I need you to check on Olivia,” Elliot explained barely avoiding a double parked car. “And stay with her.”

“Where are you? What’s going on?”

“You need to check on Olivia!” Elliot exploded. “I can’t explain now. You just need to check on her, and make sure she’s okay.”

“You got it El, are you on your way?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there soon,” Elliot replied, before he hung up the phone and remembered to breathe.

He called the CS tech department. He put in a request for them to check out Olivia’s apartment for any kind of camera’s or bugs. The man argued on the other end stated that they didn’t have time. Elliot bit his head off and threatened his job. The man’s reply was that they would be onsite within the hour.

He parked the car and sprinted into the hospital, bag, sweatshirt, and blanket in hand. Elliot took the elevator up to the fifth floor, and arrived in front of Olivia’s room looking in through the glass.

“She’s fine,” Fin explained coming up beside him. “Doc’s going to check her out just to be sure.”

“What the hell is going on?” Cragen asked as he joined them. “I just got off the phone with a pissed off tech supervisor. Apparently you threatened one of his employee’s jobs if they didn’t get to Olivia’s apartment within the hour.”

“I went to the apartment and while I was there I got a text message,” Elliot explained as he began to pace. He brought up the picture of Olivia, handing it to Cragen.

“He was watching you in her apartment,” Fin commented looking at the texts and photo next to Cragen.

“Apparently,” Elliot replied shaking his head. “I looked everywhere for a camera or a bug but there was nothing.”

“Which is why you called the tech squad,” Fin replied.

“Is she okay?” Cragen asked.

“Doctor’s are checking on her now,” Fin answered as Elliot’s focus lay on Olivia.

George and the doctor exited the room and walked toward them. Cragen was the first to speak.

“How is she?”

“As a precaution we changed out the bag, the drip and the feed. It’s all been sent to the lab for testing,” the doctor replied.

“But there was no indication that they had been tampered with,” George tried to add as an assurance.

“Good,” Cragen said with a nod. “Fin, get to Olivia’s apartment I want what ever it is this bastard has been using to watch her found.”

“We need to move her to a new room,” Elliot said with an eerie calm. “He knows where she is. That photo was taken from inside her room.”

“I’ll arrange it,” George offered and he walked away.

“What about the guards?” Elliot asked looking to Cragen.

“There have been nurses in and out of that room almost every fifteen minutes,” Cragen replied. “I will talk to them and see if anyone was acting suspicious.”

“What’s the point of having them here if this guy can walk in and snap a photo without anyone noticing?”

“Elliot, I’ll handle it!” Cragen shot back and then calmed his voice. “For all we know there could be a camera in her room and no one actually entered.”

“Yeah, because that’s so much better.”

Cragen didn’t have an answer, and Elliot watched the man take a deep breath and walk away.

Elliot saw the bag, the sweatshirt and the blanket laying on the chair where he had left them. He watched as they were preparing to move Olivia. Within moments, he heard Cragen yelling inaudible words at the two officers standing guard. He sat down in the seat next to the bag, he rested on his knees clasping his hands in front of him.

He knew there was no way to know where the photo came from or if the perp was in the room with her or not. The fact that there was even a chance infuriated him. He shouldn’t have left. He should’ve have stayed and nothing would’ve happened. She was here, vulnerable and he’d left her alone, again.

As he rose from his chair, Cragen returned.

“I need you to get checked out by the doc.”

“What?” Elliot objected. “Why?”

“It’s just a precaution, we aren’t 100% sure how Olivia ingested the toxin. You could’ve been exposed as well.”

“Cap…”

“Just do it.”

“Cap,” Elliot said as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Will you get this to the tech squad? The text’s are on there and…”

“Yeah, no problem,” Cragen replied taking the phone from him before he walked away.

*