Categories > Games > Devil May Cry > Cat Nip II
Cat Nip II
0 reviewsSequel: Being a half demon half feline had become, with only some reluctance, second nature for Nero. But damn, why did it keep getting weirder along the way? Was there no end to the seemingly rand...
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A/N Guess what...I finally started the sequel to Cat Nip! I got bored, so I figured, hey why not? Anyway, I can't guarantee daily updates but I can say I'll keep updating. Ok, to those who read 'Cat Nip' this one will be slightly different, a little more serious but not without that classic DantexNero verbal and even physical ass kicking okidoki? Review like I know you will! If I get over 100 reviews this will become a saga! So get reviewing!
Summary: Being a half demon half feline had become, with only some reluctance, second nature for Nero. But damn, why did it keep getting weirder along the way? Was there no end to the seemingly random effect's of the Curse? Obviously not...
Warnings: Swearing, violence, Dante bashing, Yaoi situations and obviously tear inducing humour!
Because guess what people... THIS IS THE SEQUEL!
Mission 1: Six months of kitty hell and oh, do you like kittens?
Six months...
Six completely fucked up months after Ninso's bout of boredom, six months after her anti-climactic defeat and six months since Nero's almost-not-quite-but-still-gave-Dante-a-heart attack death.
Six months of hissing fits, six months of countless O.D's, six months of broken noses, six months of white fur on the couch, and six months of sexy fantasies coming true...
.Months...
Nero wanted to pick up Blue Rose, give Dante a glowing finger, and shoot himself in the temple...
If only it'd actually work...
"Awe come on kid, you'd think after six months you'd be used to it by now." Nero groaned as he dropped back on the crimson couch, his legs dangling over the arm rest. Dante, who was in his usual position at his desk, feet up, weapons magazine on his face and half eaten pizza box in his lap chuckled slightly. "If I remember correctly it was you who said you'd have to get used to it." Nero huffed.
"I'm a teenager, I'm allowed to rapidly change my decisions." Dante barked a laugh.
"And I'm Dante, I'm allowed to point out your flaws just to annoy you."
"And I'm Nero, I can just as easily say no sex for a month if you pester me." Dante blinked and looked at Nero, who had his head propped on his arms.
"...Touche..." Nero smirked.
"Perverted old men like yourself are easy to blackmail." Dante scoffed and jabbed his chest with his thumb.
"Perverted yes, old no. Your evil you know that kid?"
"A kid no, evil hell yes."
"..." Dante stared, then shrugged and opened the box in his lap, taking a slice of his pizza and munching on it happily.
"Me:46 old man: 45." Dante knew what was coming, an all out take no prisoners verbal match, and he was determined to win.
"Smart ass."
"Dumb ass."
"Immature child."
"Senile old man."
"Crap pot bait."
"...What?"
"Cat's make good crap pot bait."
"Ass hole! I'll kick your ass if you repeat that!" Dante grinned.
"Me: 46, crab bait: 46, we need a tie breaker!" Nero growled and snapped upright on the couch, his Devil Bringer swinging forward while unleashing a phantom claw. He moved it to grasp the cackling Hunter, who evaded the attack by falling backwards off his chair, rolling onto his feet and diving over his desk. "Whoo easy there tiger, I'd like to keep my face thank you." Nero growled and folded his arms, dropping back on the couch with a huff.
"That's it, no sex for a week." Dante's mouth dropped open.
"What! Awe come on Nero you know I was only kidding! Jeez you seriously need to lighten up-"
"Two weeks." Dante's eyes went wide, completing the horrified expression, which soon melted into a smirk.
"Hey just remember I'm not the only one who has to suffer, if I don't get any, you don't get any either, and your the horny teenager." This had Nero snorting.
"For all you know I might have friends with benefits." Dante gasped dramatically and gripped his chest.
"Oh Nero, you wound me! Not only do you beat me, verbally abuse me and threaten me, you cheat on me too! Oh god what a fucked up taste in lovers I have."
"Get over it old man."
"...You know what, I'm not even gonna grace that with a response, I'm going to go and use all the hot water." With that Dante stood and left for a shower, leaving Nero to hiss after him and mumble about over dramatic old people with swords that can only compensate for something...Ok maybe he didn't need to compensate, but that was beside the point!
"Damn geezer..." Mumbled Nero as he absently scratched a fluffy ear. Things hadn't been as bad as he'd thought they'd be. Like Kyrie's reaction to his new...look. In all honesty he'd expected her to point and laugh at him...no...he'd wound up getting glomped and coed over...If he thought Kyrie was different before, the fact that she had a thing for cats...well...she was like the crazy cat lady down the street...
Lady, well she'd been the one to point and laugh at him, then almost put a bullet hole in his left ear after he'd snapped at her.
Trish was Trish, she just liked to throw in the odd comment to annoy him, but most of the time she just treated him as she normally would...
Dante...
Well, Dante was Dante either way you sliced him...He'd just heal and keep going until you sliced him again...then they'd be a round of four play that always led to things that belonged in R+ rated porn movies...then one badly worded comment that resulted in him nearly being castrated by Nero's Devil Bringer.
That or he wound up poisoned into oblivion...
Nero...
Well, Nero himself was taking it in stride. He'd found a way to make his ears and tail less noticeable. His tail was easy, he just wrapped it around his waist under his shirt. His ears, well the fur was the same shade of white as his hair, so all he had to do was remember to keep them flat so they wound up buried in his hair.
Other then that everything was kind of almost normal. God forbid anything actually changing that...
Argh, too late...
Nero had found the Anamagus Curse Book Dante had discarded somewhere in his room and had read over the details of his curse. While it was permanent and the mark remained still, everything else still applied. He still had bursts of random kitty playfulness –The ceiling could attest to that- He still had mood swings that put a pregnant woman to shame –only on a rare basis though- He still had his somewhat placid moments where not even Dante could make him snap –the elder hunter had actually called 911 because of this- and finally...he had his moments where he'd jump Dante at seemingly random intervals and demand he be pounded into the closest flat surface –which of course Dante had never needed to be told twice- of all the side effects of the curse he still had yet to turn into a vicious ball of fur that would sooner tear someones face off then look at you...
Then he'd discovered there was page missing from the book...
Then he'd realized something...important...
Dante had just shrugged and said 'I'm sure it wasn't anything important'
Nothing important? Well then a particular something he had to tell Dante would have to be rechecked in a full copy of the text, because Nero found it extremely important because seriously...this shit just didn't happen!
But then again, his name was Nero...if there was something bad in town, it went after him...
Why, just last week an actual Neko Youkai, as in a full blood -but not cursed- Neko youkai had decided to make a mess of Fortuna...Nero had gone to solve the problem...
The damn demon had tried to make Nero his...
Dante hadn't been to happy about that, but Nero hadn't given him enough time to tell the over stuffed plushy that he was taken...Nope, he'd stolen Pandora and used something that made a nuke look like fire cracker and officially turned the Neko Youkai into space dust...
He didn't like demons trying to rape him...
And he'd made that very...very clear...
Dante hadn't come within a thirty foot radius of him that entire week...
But that aside, seriously...THIS was just going beyond the limit...THIS was just sick and wrong...THIS was going to be the announcement of the millennium.
Nero almost hoped he was just having a very...very...VERY...fucked up dream that he would wake up from some time soon.
Just as he was thinking this Dante emerged from the bathroom behind his desk clad in only his trousers while he dried his mop with a towel. He was beginning to wonder if this was such a good idea, he could take care of it some other way...
Nah, this was too good an opportunity to pass up...
It was time to tell Dante exactly why that second page was so important...
Because seriously, it was just fucked up...
Now where did he put Blue Rose again? Maybe if he pulled enough rounds he'd finish it for good...
Or maybe he'd give Lady a call and insult her until she rounded on him with that rocket launcher of hers...
"Penny for your thoughts?" he heard Dante say as the elder plopped himself into his chair at his desk. Nero sighed, might as well get it over with, because he could not wait any longer...Dante's reaction was what decided the outcome of what he had to say...
"Are you sure you don't have the second page of that book lying around anyway?" Dante shrugged and tossed his towel into a corner.
"No idea, it could be buried somewhere, but I ain't looking for it." Nero snorted.
"I think you should." Dante raised a brow.
"Why? What's up?" Nero sighed, he'd have to say it straight to get a reaction.
"I think this curse has done more to me then we first thought, I mean, it's fucked." Dante tilted his head, urging him to continue. Nero inhaled deeply, bracing his feet against the floor in his upright position on the couch.
"I'm pregnant."
Dante blinked, his expression flat. "Come again?" Nero sighed.
"You heard me Dante, this damn curse has fucked around with me too much...I'm pregnant!" Dante blinked...nodded once slowly...then...
For the first time in uncounted years...The crimson son of Sparda...
Fainted...
A/N I think this speaks for itself...REVIEW! If you review the outcome will become clear! Not all is as it seems mwuahahaha!
Summary: Being a half demon half feline had become, with only some reluctance, second nature for Nero. But damn, why did it keep getting weirder along the way? Was there no end to the seemingly random effect's of the Curse? Obviously not...
Warnings: Swearing, violence, Dante bashing, Yaoi situations and obviously tear inducing humour!
Because guess what people... THIS IS THE SEQUEL!
Mission 1: Six months of kitty hell and oh, do you like kittens?
Six months...
Six completely fucked up months after Ninso's bout of boredom, six months after her anti-climactic defeat and six months since Nero's almost-not-quite-but-still-gave-Dante-a-heart attack death.
Six months of hissing fits, six months of countless O.D's, six months of broken noses, six months of white fur on the couch, and six months of sexy fantasies coming true...
.Months...
Nero wanted to pick up Blue Rose, give Dante a glowing finger, and shoot himself in the temple...
If only it'd actually work...
"Awe come on kid, you'd think after six months you'd be used to it by now." Nero groaned as he dropped back on the crimson couch, his legs dangling over the arm rest. Dante, who was in his usual position at his desk, feet up, weapons magazine on his face and half eaten pizza box in his lap chuckled slightly. "If I remember correctly it was you who said you'd have to get used to it." Nero huffed.
"I'm a teenager, I'm allowed to rapidly change my decisions." Dante barked a laugh.
"And I'm Dante, I'm allowed to point out your flaws just to annoy you."
"And I'm Nero, I can just as easily say no sex for a month if you pester me." Dante blinked and looked at Nero, who had his head propped on his arms.
"...Touche..." Nero smirked.
"Perverted old men like yourself are easy to blackmail." Dante scoffed and jabbed his chest with his thumb.
"Perverted yes, old no. Your evil you know that kid?"
"A kid no, evil hell yes."
"..." Dante stared, then shrugged and opened the box in his lap, taking a slice of his pizza and munching on it happily.
"Me:46 old man: 45." Dante knew what was coming, an all out take no prisoners verbal match, and he was determined to win.
"Smart ass."
"Dumb ass."
"Immature child."
"Senile old man."
"Crap pot bait."
"...What?"
"Cat's make good crap pot bait."
"Ass hole! I'll kick your ass if you repeat that!" Dante grinned.
"Me: 46, crab bait: 46, we need a tie breaker!" Nero growled and snapped upright on the couch, his Devil Bringer swinging forward while unleashing a phantom claw. He moved it to grasp the cackling Hunter, who evaded the attack by falling backwards off his chair, rolling onto his feet and diving over his desk. "Whoo easy there tiger, I'd like to keep my face thank you." Nero growled and folded his arms, dropping back on the couch with a huff.
"That's it, no sex for a week." Dante's mouth dropped open.
"What! Awe come on Nero you know I was only kidding! Jeez you seriously need to lighten up-"
"Two weeks." Dante's eyes went wide, completing the horrified expression, which soon melted into a smirk.
"Hey just remember I'm not the only one who has to suffer, if I don't get any, you don't get any either, and your the horny teenager." This had Nero snorting.
"For all you know I might have friends with benefits." Dante gasped dramatically and gripped his chest.
"Oh Nero, you wound me! Not only do you beat me, verbally abuse me and threaten me, you cheat on me too! Oh god what a fucked up taste in lovers I have."
"Get over it old man."
"...You know what, I'm not even gonna grace that with a response, I'm going to go and use all the hot water." With that Dante stood and left for a shower, leaving Nero to hiss after him and mumble about over dramatic old people with swords that can only compensate for something...Ok maybe he didn't need to compensate, but that was beside the point!
"Damn geezer..." Mumbled Nero as he absently scratched a fluffy ear. Things hadn't been as bad as he'd thought they'd be. Like Kyrie's reaction to his new...look. In all honesty he'd expected her to point and laugh at him...no...he'd wound up getting glomped and coed over...If he thought Kyrie was different before, the fact that she had a thing for cats...well...she was like the crazy cat lady down the street...
Lady, well she'd been the one to point and laugh at him, then almost put a bullet hole in his left ear after he'd snapped at her.
Trish was Trish, she just liked to throw in the odd comment to annoy him, but most of the time she just treated him as she normally would...
Dante...
Well, Dante was Dante either way you sliced him...He'd just heal and keep going until you sliced him again...then they'd be a round of four play that always led to things that belonged in R+ rated porn movies...then one badly worded comment that resulted in him nearly being castrated by Nero's Devil Bringer.
That or he wound up poisoned into oblivion...
Nero...
Well, Nero himself was taking it in stride. He'd found a way to make his ears and tail less noticeable. His tail was easy, he just wrapped it around his waist under his shirt. His ears, well the fur was the same shade of white as his hair, so all he had to do was remember to keep them flat so they wound up buried in his hair.
Other then that everything was kind of almost normal. God forbid anything actually changing that...
Argh, too late...
Nero had found the Anamagus Curse Book Dante had discarded somewhere in his room and had read over the details of his curse. While it was permanent and the mark remained still, everything else still applied. He still had bursts of random kitty playfulness –The ceiling could attest to that- He still had mood swings that put a pregnant woman to shame –only on a rare basis though- He still had his somewhat placid moments where not even Dante could make him snap –the elder hunter had actually called 911 because of this- and finally...he had his moments where he'd jump Dante at seemingly random intervals and demand he be pounded into the closest flat surface –which of course Dante had never needed to be told twice- of all the side effects of the curse he still had yet to turn into a vicious ball of fur that would sooner tear someones face off then look at you...
Then he'd discovered there was page missing from the book...
Then he'd realized something...important...
Dante had just shrugged and said 'I'm sure it wasn't anything important'
Nothing important? Well then a particular something he had to tell Dante would have to be rechecked in a full copy of the text, because Nero found it extremely important because seriously...this shit just didn't happen!
But then again, his name was Nero...if there was something bad in town, it went after him...
Why, just last week an actual Neko Youkai, as in a full blood -but not cursed- Neko youkai had decided to make a mess of Fortuna...Nero had gone to solve the problem...
The damn demon had tried to make Nero his...
Dante hadn't been to happy about that, but Nero hadn't given him enough time to tell the over stuffed plushy that he was taken...Nope, he'd stolen Pandora and used something that made a nuke look like fire cracker and officially turned the Neko Youkai into space dust...
He didn't like demons trying to rape him...
And he'd made that very...very clear...
Dante hadn't come within a thirty foot radius of him that entire week...
But that aside, seriously...THIS was just going beyond the limit...THIS was just sick and wrong...THIS was going to be the announcement of the millennium.
Nero almost hoped he was just having a very...very...VERY...fucked up dream that he would wake up from some time soon.
Just as he was thinking this Dante emerged from the bathroom behind his desk clad in only his trousers while he dried his mop with a towel. He was beginning to wonder if this was such a good idea, he could take care of it some other way...
Nah, this was too good an opportunity to pass up...
It was time to tell Dante exactly why that second page was so important...
Because seriously, it was just fucked up...
Now where did he put Blue Rose again? Maybe if he pulled enough rounds he'd finish it for good...
Or maybe he'd give Lady a call and insult her until she rounded on him with that rocket launcher of hers...
"Penny for your thoughts?" he heard Dante say as the elder plopped himself into his chair at his desk. Nero sighed, might as well get it over with, because he could not wait any longer...Dante's reaction was what decided the outcome of what he had to say...
"Are you sure you don't have the second page of that book lying around anyway?" Dante shrugged and tossed his towel into a corner.
"No idea, it could be buried somewhere, but I ain't looking for it." Nero snorted.
"I think you should." Dante raised a brow.
"Why? What's up?" Nero sighed, he'd have to say it straight to get a reaction.
"I think this curse has done more to me then we first thought, I mean, it's fucked." Dante tilted his head, urging him to continue. Nero inhaled deeply, bracing his feet against the floor in his upright position on the couch.
"I'm pregnant."
Dante blinked, his expression flat. "Come again?" Nero sighed.
"You heard me Dante, this damn curse has fucked around with me too much...I'm pregnant!" Dante blinked...nodded once slowly...then...
For the first time in uncounted years...The crimson son of Sparda...
Fainted...
A/N I think this speaks for itself...REVIEW! If you review the outcome will become clear! Not all is as it seems mwuahahaha!
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