Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > You Shut Me Up And Bleed Me Dry.
Let This Go.
Chapter Two. Ryan explains all to Brendon. And Maybe Brendon let's his secret slip.
?Blocked
"Ryan! Lets watch movies in my room!" Spencer's smile was so perfect, it was hard not to stare at it. We were 13, And I guess that was the first day i realized I even had feelings for Spencer. I know it was a young age, but...something made my stomach go into flips when we sat on his bed eating popcorn, watching Twister and wondering what it would be like to chase tornado's for a living, from that day on, Spencer always wanted to do something like that. We were lying belly down, elbows touching, I felt my body freeze slightly, and Spencer looked over to me, smiling. God would you stop fucking smiling already!
I'm glad he never knew I had feelings for him, it wasn't that he was homophobic or anything, Things would of just gotten weird, and with Spence being my only friend in school...I didn't particularly want to loose him. In any sense.
So here I was, Face to face with Brendon, and still wondering what I was going to say. I shook my head and pretended to chuckle.
"Me? In-love with Spencer?" I laughed a very loud and fake laugh, Which caused Brendon to cock his brow, a small eye roll shortly after.
"Yes, you in-love with Spencer, Come on Ryan, I'm not blind..." He looked away for a second before looking back at me,
"Hes completely straight....it must not be easy..." I frowned and sighed, tipping my head down, my hand moved up to rub the back of my neck, he was right, It wasn't easy.
"Look...I..." Biting my lip, I opened my eyes to find Brendon inches away from my face, he had the weirdest....look in his eyes,, and I felt my heart thump harder in my chest. I swallowed thickly, tilting my head slightly to one side.
"What...are you doing?" I whispered as his hand moved up to cup my face, Was he going to kiss me? Brendon Urie...was going to kiss me. And I didn't have the strength to say no. He smiled shyly, biting at his lip before he pulled back and shrugged.
"Nothing..." he said softly, turning away, he began to walk, and i just stood there, dumb-founded. Completely and utterly out of words. And he was walking away....
The school day moved extremely slow. Brendon basically ignored me during Math and English, I didn't understand why, and neither did Spencer. But why would Spencer? He had no idea I was even gay. I flicked through my Biology notes as Brendon walked into class. Why was he looking so attractive all of a sudden? Why did I want to shove him into a wall and kiss his amazingly plump lips.
"Ryan?" I shook my head and looked up, Brendon's brow was cocked, he seemed to do that a lot. I smiled and bit my lip, looking up at him.
"Hey..."I whispered, looking back down to my book. He slid in next to me, apparently we were Biology partners, I didn't even realize. I guess I spent most of class staring at Spencer to realize who I was partnered with. Until now. Until he almost kissed me, and until I almost didn't stop him.
"Wanna hang out after school...?" he said softly, his hand making it's way to my inner thigh.
I looked at him and swallowed, my eyes widened and all I could do was nod quickly and look back down to my book. Then I felt it, his hot breath on my neck, I felt myself grow instantly hard and Brendon just chuckled. Was he seriously arousing me in class?
"I can see you like that....want some help?"
"Did you seriously just say that....?" I replied, turning to look at him.
"Guys, Attention to the subject at hand okay?" The teacher shook his head and continued to read from a page somewhere in the book.
"The subject at hand is how quickly we can meet in the janitors closet" Brendon winked and stood up, getting a look from the teacher, "Hall pass...? I gotta piss"
"Brendon, that language is not permitted in the class room, watch your manners, and don't take long please, this chapter is important for passing this grade" Brendon nodded and took a slip of paper from the teacher. He turned to wink at me before pushing the door open and walking out.
SERIOUSLY? Right now?!
Swallowing, I waited two minutes, I was nervous as all hell, I didn't know if I should go...or if I should just blow it off. I stood up hesitantly, packing my bag. I slowly made my way to the front of the room,
"Ahh...excuse me Sir? I'm not feeling very well...at all...would...you mind if I went to get some water?" He looked up and smiled, "That's fine...if you're not well you should go home, Ryan" Did he just say that? I nodded and smiled as he wrote another slip for me this time, and I hurried out of the door. I noticed Brendon waiting in the hall, a wicked grin on his face.
As I approached him he nodded, almost like a victory.
"Your house or mine?" he mumbled, looking around.
"Mine..." I replied, swallowing quickly as we made our way out of the hall and down to the parking lot.
I'm glad he never knew I had feelings for him, it wasn't that he was homophobic or anything, Things would of just gotten weird, and with Spence being my only friend in school...I didn't particularly want to loose him. In any sense.
So here I was, Face to face with Brendon, and still wondering what I was going to say. I shook my head and pretended to chuckle.
"Me? In-love with Spencer?" I laughed a very loud and fake laugh, Which caused Brendon to cock his brow, a small eye roll shortly after.
"Yes, you in-love with Spencer, Come on Ryan, I'm not blind..." He looked away for a second before looking back at me,
"Hes completely straight....it must not be easy..." I frowned and sighed, tipping my head down, my hand moved up to rub the back of my neck, he was right, It wasn't easy.
"Look...I..." Biting my lip, I opened my eyes to find Brendon inches away from my face, he had the weirdest....look in his eyes,, and I felt my heart thump harder in my chest. I swallowed thickly, tilting my head slightly to one side.
"What...are you doing?" I whispered as his hand moved up to cup my face, Was he going to kiss me? Brendon Urie...was going to kiss me. And I didn't have the strength to say no. He smiled shyly, biting at his lip before he pulled back and shrugged.
"Nothing..." he said softly, turning away, he began to walk, and i just stood there, dumb-founded. Completely and utterly out of words. And he was walking away....
The school day moved extremely slow. Brendon basically ignored me during Math and English, I didn't understand why, and neither did Spencer. But why would Spencer? He had no idea I was even gay. I flicked through my Biology notes as Brendon walked into class. Why was he looking so attractive all of a sudden? Why did I want to shove him into a wall and kiss his amazingly plump lips.
"Ryan?" I shook my head and looked up, Brendon's brow was cocked, he seemed to do that a lot. I smiled and bit my lip, looking up at him.
"Hey..."I whispered, looking back down to my book. He slid in next to me, apparently we were Biology partners, I didn't even realize. I guess I spent most of class staring at Spencer to realize who I was partnered with. Until now. Until he almost kissed me, and until I almost didn't stop him.
"Wanna hang out after school...?" he said softly, his hand making it's way to my inner thigh.
I looked at him and swallowed, my eyes widened and all I could do was nod quickly and look back down to my book. Then I felt it, his hot breath on my neck, I felt myself grow instantly hard and Brendon just chuckled. Was he seriously arousing me in class?
"I can see you like that....want some help?"
"Did you seriously just say that....?" I replied, turning to look at him.
"Guys, Attention to the subject at hand okay?" The teacher shook his head and continued to read from a page somewhere in the book.
"The subject at hand is how quickly we can meet in the janitors closet" Brendon winked and stood up, getting a look from the teacher, "Hall pass...? I gotta piss"
"Brendon, that language is not permitted in the class room, watch your manners, and don't take long please, this chapter is important for passing this grade" Brendon nodded and took a slip of paper from the teacher. He turned to wink at me before pushing the door open and walking out.
SERIOUSLY? Right now?!
Swallowing, I waited two minutes, I was nervous as all hell, I didn't know if I should go...or if I should just blow it off. I stood up hesitantly, packing my bag. I slowly made my way to the front of the room,
"Ahh...excuse me Sir? I'm not feeling very well...at all...would...you mind if I went to get some water?" He looked up and smiled, "That's fine...if you're not well you should go home, Ryan" Did he just say that? I nodded and smiled as he wrote another slip for me this time, and I hurried out of the door. I noticed Brendon waiting in the hall, a wicked grin on his face.
As I approached him he nodded, almost like a victory.
"Your house or mine?" he mumbled, looking around.
"Mine..." I replied, swallowing quickly as we made our way out of the hall and down to the parking lot.
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