FicWad

For the rest of the week the thought that I might not love him wouldn't leave my head. I often found myself drifting out of conversations and being asked if I was okay or not. Even Mikey noticed something was up with me and just wouldn't leave me alone.

Now on Saturday I'm dreading this dinner party even more knowing the fact that I'm being introduced to important people with this - possibly - huge life changing problem on my hands. I'm going to have to tell somebody but I don't have a single clue who.

At that moment there was a knock on the door and I answered it thankful for the distraction.

"Sorry I'm a little late; roadworks are doing my nut in." Scarlet apolagised.

"Don't worry about it. If I'm honest I totally forgot you were coming round." I suddenly found myself smiling because I realised I could tell Scarlet.

Even though Scarlet is with Gerard I know she'll keep this just between me and her. I know I can trust Scarlet with my deepest darkest secrets and the fact that she won't judge me on them.

Scarlet followed me upstairs to my room and she instantly started telling me what to do.

"You need to switch on your curlers, get your make up out, get your dress and shows out so I can decide which mask will be the best for tonight." She ordered me while she rooted through the bag she'd brought with her.

I did as I was told but when I went in my wardrobe to get my dress; she must have noticed that I have exactly the same dress but in purple as well as red.

"Actually get the purple one out, I have an idea." She told me while switching off the curlers.

"What's the idea?" I asked hanging the dress on the wardrobe door.

"Sit down. I'm going to put a semi-permament purple on your hair just for tonight then it'll wash out in the morning." She informed me while getting the hair dying things out of her bag.

I sat down at my dressing table so she could put the hair dye on. After she'd put the dye on we sat watching the music channels.

"Scarlet, have you ever doubted that you love Gerard?" I asked her when the adverts came on.

"No. Why have you?" Scarlet replied looking at me out of the corner of her eye.

"Well, just recently I've been thinking, I can say 'love you' at the drop of a hat but I can't atually say the three simpliest words to him. It's just got me thinking do I actually love him or not." I confided in her, "Don't tell Gerard." I warned her.

"I won't tell him; he'll annoy you about it infront of Mikey and then if you two do break up - I'm not saying you will - he'll probably stop talking to you full stop." Scarlet explained her reasons about not telling Gerard.

"Thanks Scarlet." I replied feeling like a reat weight has been lifted off my shoulders.

"What are you going to do about it?" She asked me after a moment of silence.

"To be honest, I could do with getting away from here for a couple of weeks so I can sort this out." I replied sighing.

"Does that mean a couple of weeks with your dad?" She asked me while checking my hair.

"Not my dad; but other relatives in England, definitely." I told her. "Possibly see some of my friends again, do some shopping, see some English bands and switch my phone off to try and figure out how I feel about him."

"How about you use that other phone you have and text me, just me. Or better yet I could come with you... If you want me to that is." Scarlet suggested.

"Yeah, you could come with me. I know how much you want to see England." I smiled, all I have to do is talk to my mum about it.

"Go wash your hair, it's been half an hour." Scarlet seemed happy.

When I came back from washing my hair the curlers were warming up and Scarlet was waiting at my dressing table with my hair dryer in her hands. I sat down in front of her and saw my make up all lined up on the table and loads of masks which will go with my dress.

Half way through curling my hair Scarlet mentioned, "the family who your mum is getting you to meet has a son our age; I think you should get his number."

"Scarlet! Why should I get another guys' number when I'm not even sure about the guy I'm with?" I asked her.

"I don't know, it was just a suggestion." She replied turning my curlers off and starting on my make up.

Once my make up was finished I put on my dress and shoes and we tried on every mask Scarlet had brought with her. It's amazing how she brought purple ones with her instead of red.

Eventually, just two seconds before we had to leave, Scarlet and me managed to find the perfect mask. That was so lucky.

I was putting a couple of things in my bag to go, when I thought - in a one in a million chance - what if he does want my number. So instead of picking up my normal phone I picked up the one which only my dad has the number to.