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That night, I went to bed rather depressed. I couldn't get Lucius out of my head and the way his hand had felt skimming over my body. I would do anything for him to touch me again. But deep inside, I knew he never would. He didn't want me. Basically, he had told me to fuck off last night and leave him alone. At this point, I didn't really have a choice but to do that. I didn't know Lucius' story, but I knew enough to know that if I continued to stalk him, all I would accomplish would be irritating him.

The next morning, I was awaken by Bellatrix nice and early. Feeling a hand shaking my shoulder roughly, I opened my puffy eyes and gazed up into my sister's big brown orbs. Bella gave me a small smile and said, "Hey Cissy. I'm getting you up now so you don't have to run around like crazy to get ready like yesterday when you slept in too late."

"Oh right," I said, trying to clear the sleepy haze I was swimming in. Than after a second thought, I added, "Thanks for waking me, Bella." I was in a pretty crappy mood this morning, but that didn't mean that I could be rude to Bella. Besides, it was kind of silly to be in a bad mood just because of a guy.

"Anytime, Cissy," Bellatrix said with a genuine smile. However, after taking a closer look at me, her smile started to fade and I noticed concern in my sister's eyes as she said, "No offense, but you don't look so good. Your eyes are all red and puffy and you're as pale as a ghost. What happened to you last night? You ran off after Tom's meeting and I couldn't find you anywhere. Did something happen? Nobody hurt you, did they?"

"No, of course not," I quickly replied, shaking my head. Not wanting to tell Bella about Lucius, I lied, "I'm fine. I'm just a little shocked about the whole 'Death Eaters' thing. I'm not seriously going to have to kill anyone, right?" That had also been on my mind. I hadn't wanted to be a Death Eater. Maybe I wasn't really a Death Eater. Maybe you were only a Death Eater if you killed someone.

Bellatrix thought for a moment and then shook her head, "Nah, I don't think Tom would make you kill anyone. You're not exactly the killing type. That's okay though. I'm sure you'll still be useful to him in some way or another. Anyways, we'd better get ready for school before we end up chatting all morning. I'll meet you in the Great Hall for breakfast, alright?"

I nodded and watched as Bella trudged across the room and started rooting through her bag for something to wear. Once her eyes were off of me, I went to my own bag and tried to find something to wear. After searching for a few minutes, I selected a black velvet dress to put on beneath my robes. Hoping that nobody was watching me, I stripped down and slipped the cool velor fabric over my body. Just as I finished buttoning up the dress, I heard a cackle from behind me.

Oh god, had someone been watching me get dressed? That was pretty humiliating. Peering over my shoulder to see who had laughed, I turned to see Natasha lying in the bed across from me. She was watching me with teasing blue eyes and a smirk. When our eyes met, Natasha said, "Morning, little Cissy. Just to let you know, you don't stand a chance with Lucius. He'd never want a girl with a body like yours. Seriously, you look like you're eight years old or something."

Natasha's comment hit me hard. My self esteem was pretty low and now it was rock bottom low. Did I really have the body of an eight-year-old? I supposed it was true. I was rather small for my age. Somehow, Bellatrix had managed to shoot up a good half foot over the summer and now towered over me. It also was pretty true that I didn't have a single curve on my body. My chest was pretty much flat as well. Nat was right; I was ugly. No wonder Lucius didn't want me.

Blushing, I looked at my feet as I pulled my black robes over my shoulders and acknowledged Natasha's statement with a simple, "You're right. He doesn't want me. But really, what do you give a shit? He doesn't want you either." That definitely wasn't the nicest thing to say, but I wanted to hurt Natasha like she had just hurt me. Vengeance burned in my heart.

Before Natasha could get all pissed off at me, I quickly hurried down the hallway of the Slytherin dormitories and out into the common room. Only once I was outside the dormitory did I realize that I hadn't brushed my hair or applied any makeup. Oops. Why did I always remember these things too late? I was just about to turn and run back into the dormitory when I heard my name.

"There you are, Cissy! Come on over here and let's get breakfast. I'm starving aren't you?" the voice obviously belonged to Walden. I mean, who else would wait for me? Deciding that I couldn't ignore him and go back into the dormitory to do my makeup, I slowly turned and headed in his direction. I finger-combed my blonde tangles and grabbed a tube of lipstick from the pocket of my robe as I did so. Trying to act inconspicious, I attempted to apply the lipstick. Too bad there wasn't any way to know if I had smudged it or not. I could really use a mirror right about now...

"Oh god, what happened to you? You look like hell," a new voice from someone standing next to Walden met my ears. My cheeks immediately went hot at the comment. Everyone just felt like they had to insult me this morning now, didn't they? The very last bit of my self confidence dissolved into thin air and I was left wishing I hadn't been born.

Reading into my thoughts, Walden put a hand on my shoulder and said, "There, there. You don't look like hell. Avery is the one who looks like hell with those ugly freckles on his nose. But...um...did something happen, Cissy? You look like you might have been crying." Walden's voice was gentle and I could tell he was trying to phrase his sentences carefully.

Looking up, I saw Avery giving me an apologetic look. Grimacing, he said, "Sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you. I was just wondering what was up." I didn't really think that was the case, but I decided to accept Avery's apology with a nod. I wasn't in the mood to hold grudges. I was hurting from Lucius' rejection and Natasha's criticism.

Letting myself slump against Walden, I said in a monotone, "I guess you could say something happened." Walden immediately raised his eyebrows. But before he could ask another question, I quickly continued on, "I don't want to talk about it though. Let's just go to breakfast." I wasn't hungry, but breakfast seemed like something that could distract Walden.

He hesitated for a moment and gave me a nervous look even though he started in the direction of the Great Hall. I followed him and did my best not to think about Lucius, Natasha, or how ugly I was. As we clunked through the corridors, Walden glanced over his shoulder at me and asked suspiciously, "Were you with some guy last night? I saw you sneak out after Tom's meeting."

Oh geez, did Walden feel like he had to monitor my every move or something? It wasn't like he was my father. Just like that, my temper instantly flared and I found myself defensive as I retorted, "Of course I wasn't with some guy. I'm way too ugly to be liked. Besides, what's it to you if I was with some guy? It's not really anyone's business except mine."

"Wait, where the hell did you get that from?" Walden asked with a horrified expression on his face. "You're anything but ugly. Where did you get that from? There are many guys who would like you as a girlfriend. Haven't you seen all the guys who have been looking at you? You've gotta be blind if you haven't noticed them. That's why I worry about you. You could get hurt if you're not careful." Walden tightened his grip on my wrist and pulled me a bit closer.

I thought about what he had said as I continued into the Great Hall with him. He definitely had to be lying. There certainly hadn't been any guys looking at me except for Walden. And even if there were a lot of guys looking at me, I didn't want any of them. I already had my eye on the forbidden apple. There was really no need to tell Walden this though.

Trying to calm myself before I said something I was going to regret, I forced a smile on my lips and said, "You're too nice to me. We all know I'm the ugliest Black sister. Andromeda is pretty in her own way and Bellatrix is downright beautiful. But anyways, let's not talk about that. And just to let you know, I'm not interested in any of those guys who have been 'looking at me' or whatever. So really, there's no need for you to worry. Let's go sit at the Slytherin table."

With that said, I took Walden's arm and dragged him other to the Slytherin table for breakfast before he could harp on me anymore. What I had just told him wasn't exactly a lie; it was true I wasn't interested in any guys (including Walden) who might be looking at me for future girlfriend material. All I wanted was the one guy who wasn't looking in my direction. Ironic, huh?

Walden and I sat down at the Slytherin table and Walden immediately started for the food. He grabbed a big cream cheese danish, a banana, and a blueberry muffin. I tried not to stare at his food too much. I mean, how in the world was he going to manage to eat all that for breakfast? As I was thinking this, my own stomach grumbled.

My first impulse was to eat, but after thinking it over for a few minutes, I decided not to. In order to attract guys (um, one particular guy), I was going to have to look prettier. That was a fact. Like Natasha had said, Lucius would not be interested at all in an ugly girl. If there was any possibility that I had a chance with him at all, I was going to have to improve my body. Guys liked skinny girls, right? I figured they had to. After all, the supermodels and all the wives of rich purebloods are always stick thin.

Summoning up my will power, I made a vow to myself. I was going to do whatever it took to make Lucius notice me. And secondly, I would do whatever it took to make myself thin and beautiful. With this new resolution in mind, I ignored my grumbling stomach and sat quietly in my chair. The food no longer looked appetizing. All it would do would be to make me fat.

"Hello Narcissa. How are you feeling today?" a cool, slick voice snuck into my thoughts and demanded my attention. Quickly jerking out of my reverie, I shot my head upwards and looked across the table to see none other than Tom Riddle. My heart immediately sank at seeing him and my left forearm prickled slightly. The spot where the Dark Mark had been burned into my skin was very tender and I was doing my absolute best to avoid touching it.

I could tell Tom just how awful I was feeling, but I didn't dare to. He was powerful and was the leader of the group. I didn't want to disappoint him. So all I said was, "I'm doing just fine this morning, Tom. Thanks for asking. And how are you doing yourself?" At my words, Tom's lip curled and he immediately hissed, "You lie."

His words were not so nice this time and the pain in my left forearm become suddenly more painful. I felt suddenly very nervous. It was as if I was expecting Tom to punish me for lying. Trembling ever so slightly, I murmured, "I...I'm sorry." There wasn't anything else to say really. Besides, my voice was shaking too much to say more.

Impulsively, Tom reached over across the table and grabbed my chin roughly so our eyes immediately connected. Just like last night, I found the images of my encounter with Lucius brought to the front of my mind. Tom's lip curled even more as he viewed my memories and he continued in that deadly hiss, "One thing you will learn is that you should never lie to me. Next time, there will be punishment. I will be merciful to you this time, but realize this; I know your innermost thoughts whether you share them with me or not. So really, there's no point at all in lying."

I gulped and nodded slightly, unsure what to say or do. Out of the corner of my eye, I shot a look over at Walden to see what he was doing. Walden was chatting through a big mouth of danish with Nott and Avery. He didn't see Tom and me at all. Great. Where was Walden when I needed him?

Suddenly, Tom dropped my chin and went back to his normal self. His voice lost the deadly hiss and he smiled a good-looking, but creepy smile. Regardless of how good looking he was, that smile would forever send chills up my spine from now on. There was something not right about Tom. He was insane. Crazy. Fanatical.

As I was contemplating about Tom, a loud voice from the table the Professors shared uttered a loud, "May I have your attention please? I need to inform you about some events in your upcoming schedule."