FicWad

BABETTE
The next morning I awoke to the gray overcast sky and a kind nurse who offered me coffee. I got out of Gerard’s bed and sat in the chair across from it. The nurse came back and offered me a blanket, which I accepted because the room was chilly. Then for a long time I just sat all wrapped up in my pajamas holding this cup of coffee, staring blankly at Gerard. After a while I scooted the chair over to him and stroked his sunken cheek. He looked like a corpse and that scared me.

“Hey, how is he?” Elodie whispered, surprising me with her presence. She took another seat next to Gerard and studied him. “He looks terrible…but you look even worse.” she added, giving me the once over.

“I could hardly sleep. They pumped his full of charcoal to make him throw up.” I said, a sickly shiver going through me. “He’s been puking all night.”

“Yikes.” Elodie said, cringing at the thought. I absent-mindedly twirled a lock of his greasy black hair in my fingers while I stared at him. I felt so numb, so gray, just like the clouds this morning.

“I’m gonna go get us some McDonald’s, okay? You need to eat something.” Elodie said after a long bout of silence. She touched my shoulder and I didn’t move until I felt her leave.

Slowly but surely Gerard’s ringed eyes began to flutter open. I held my breath. The first thing he did was bend forward and cringe while holding his stomach. Then he laid down weakly and turned to me.

“Babes…what happened?” he asked, sounding so weak and helpless. His voice was rough and scratchy, probably from all he vomiting.

“You have alcohol poisoning so they pumped your stomach with charcoal and you spent the night throwing up in your sleep.” I said blankly, feeling void of all emotion.

“Ugh…” was all he managed to say. Then he looked around and saw the needles in his arm. His reaction was as expected. “Oh. My. Fucking. God.” He said, gaping at the IV tube in his fore arm. He looked like a helpless child with raised eyebrows and wide eyes.

“They had to give you fluids. Don’t worry, your fine.” I assured him, placing my hand on his. He took a few shuttering breaths before looking away and tucking his arm under the sheets.

“So when can I leave this shit hole?” he asked, regaining some of his personality back. I smirked wryly.

“I dunno. Let’s ask a nurse.”

A DAY LATER

Gerard had to stay overnight again for observation and was then told to be given strict bed rest for the rest of the weekend. His family agreed to let him stay with me the entire time because they were afraid he would exert himself at their home. He was laying in bed, only a dash of color in his face, looking and acting much like a ghost. In a way we all were acting like ghosts. Elodie avoided Gerard, which he felt bad about. And I was distant with him out of my anger.

How could he have done that to himself? To me? Was about all I could think of at the time. I felt so hurt by his self-destruction that every morning when I showered I would cry silently to myself. Everybody in the apartment was being weighed down by the whole event.

“Babes, can we talk for a second?” Gerard asked weakly as I poured him a glass of water.

“Sure.” I said. He invited me to climb up on the bed and I did, sitting cross-legged in front of him.

“Do you hate me?” he asked impishly. I sighed heavily.

“No…I’m just upset.” I said, swallowing thickly. He waited for me to continue. “I mean, how could you do that to us? We need you Gerard, you could’ve seriously hurt yourself. And I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.” I rambled, my voice growing shrill and sharp until it cracked and tears spilled out my eyes. Gerard quickly scooped me up in his arms like a small child and cooed softly in my ear.

“I’m so sorry Babes. I should’ve known better. I’m sorry. Sh, you won’t loose me. You’ve got me too tightly wrapped around your finger.” He promised quietly to me.

“I was so s-scared.” I stammered through my tears. Gerard hugged me even tighter and promised over and over that he was okay.

“I’m gonna stop this. Don’t you worry. Everything will be fine, alright? Everything will be perfect.” He said. But I had no idea that things were about to get much, much worse.


THREE WEEKS LATER
Mikey’s birthday party was today. We all sat around and drank a few beers, had some cake and opened presents. Things with him and Elodie were more than awkward and they didn’t say more than two words to each other the entire night.

“Well, we better get going. I have work tomorrow.” Gerard said with a proud smile. He hadn’t touched a drop of booze since his accident and things were going great for him at work. But his proposal for a new cartoon was just rejected, so he was bummed out about that.

“Okay, okay. You two head off now. Call me and tell me how work was tomorrow okay honey?” Donna asked sweetly, kissing Gerard on the cheek. He was such a mama’s boy.

“Okay ma, I’ll talk to you tomorrow.” He said. Then he hugged Mikey and his dad and we left the Way household.

“That was fun. I can’t believe Mikey is twenty four.” I said happily as we went from the chilly September streets to Gerard’s car.

“Yeah, they grow up so fast.” Gerard said, mocking my tone. I made a face at him and held his hand as we drove home.

THE NEXT DAY
That morning I realized I had left my wallet at Gerard’s house, so Elodie and I decided to go and get it after he went to work. We were laughing and joking around on the ferry, probably causing a scene. But we didn’t care; it was a crystal clear morning without a cloud in sight. And for the first time since Gerard’s incident I felt calm and happy.

“That plane is flying in really close. Do you think its landing?” Elodie asked, squinting and pointing up at an extremely low flying plane. I gazed up at it, too, among many of the other passengers.

“I don’t think so…there’s no airports in the city.” I said curiously. “I wonder what’s going on.”

“Maybe they’re having technical difficulties.” Elodie suggested with a shrug. I shrugged too, but just as I did a tremendous explosion seemed to happen right in my ear. I whipped around to see a gaping hole in one of the Twin Towers and a gigantic plume of black smoke rising from it.

I hit the floor. All I could hear was Elodie and other passengers screaming. We all watched in terror as the smoke cloud grew bigger and bigger. After a few minutes of being in shock, I turned and tried to calm Elodie down. It seemed she was on the verge of a nervous break down.

“What’s happening? What just happened? What’s going on?” She shrieked through her thick tears. Her eyes were frantically darting in her eye sockets, like she was a trapped animal desperate to escape.

“Ellie, look at me.” I said, taking her face in my hands. Her eyes continued to cry and panic. “Look at me.” I said firmly, giving her a shake. She blinked and stared at me, horrified and sobbing.

“Ellie, you have to stay calm. You have to keep it together. Snap out of it.” I said sternly, looking her dead in the eyes. I was trying to follow my own advice so that I could help her. She was loosing it, I could tell. All I wanted at the moment was to be at Gerard’s house, safe and away from the city.

“Gerard…” I mumbled, the sudden realization hitting me like a Mac Truck straight to the chest. I quickly whipped out my phone and dialed his number, hoping for an answer. All I got was voice mail and I found myself fighting the panic that was rising inside my chest like a hot air balloon.

After a few minutes once the scene had taken on s tiny bit of calm, the captain of the ferry made an announcement.

“Okay people, I have just received orders that we are to keep heading to New Jersey and to get as far away from the city as possible. This is a possible terrorist threat so I advise you all to head into the suburbs.” The captain said over the loud speaker. My heart did a flip in my chest. Elodie lost it again.

“Who would do this? Why are they doing this?” she screamed, tears pouring out of her eyes like geysers. I grabbed her shoulders and shook her, but she kept screaming undistinguishable words. I slapped her across the face with my left hand. She stopped and stared at me in shock.

“Ellie, stay calm. We have to be strong. We’ll be at Gerard’s house soon enough. Just hang in there. Please Ell, be strong.” I pleaded. She blinked a few times and curled up in a ball on my chest, whimpering.

“I want mom.” She cried quietly. I suddenly realized that I too wanted to be with my mom. No matter how much somebody may hurt you, it’s always comforting to know that your mother is by your side taking care of you.

“I want mom, too Ellie. I want mom too…” I said very softly in her ear. We stayed like that until the ferry pulled up to the docks. Then we rushed off like all the other people aboard and started booking it to Gerard’s house.

But then the unthinkable happened. A second plane flew out of seemingly nowhere right into the south tower, causing more screaming, more smoke and another loud, earsplitting crash. Elodie shrieked again and I covered her mouth with my hand. Then I grabbed her waist and practically carried her the rest of the way.

The streets were like a war zone. People screaming and crying, running frantically in no particular directions. But I kept pushing us forward. I had to. I had no choice.

“Donna!” I screamed as we sprinted up the steps of the front door. “Donna!”

“Oh, Babs! Thank god you two are okay! Come in, come in!” she said, shoving us inside and slamming the door behind us. She pulled both of us into a warm hug, smothering us. But we welcomed it so much. I was so happy to have finally gotten here that is hurt.

“Oh thank god…” Donna kept repeating over and over, petting my hair. She sat us all down in the darkened living room with Mikey and Donald.

The only light was the TV, which was turned to the national news station. They were playing clips of the burning buildings and bodies falling out of them. They said that it was a confirmed terrorist attack. Elodie began to whimper desperately. Mikey jumped over and cradled her in his arms until she fell silent. Much to my surprise, she let him hold her. I could tell that he had a thing for her, but I didn’t want him to get in over his head.

“Has anybody gotten any contact with Gerard?” Donna asked, her voice shaking when she said her eldest son’s name. My body went numb and the blood drained from my face.

I pulled my phone out, dialed his number and hit speakerphone. It went straight to voicemail without even wringing. I threw my phone of the ground and let out a cry of anger, fear, and desperation. If he was hurt, if something happened to him; I just didn’t know what I would do…

“Gerard…” Donna said slowly before bursting into tears. I was quick to join her.

All day we sat, all of us going in and out of tears, waiting for Gerard to come home. I was horrified that time would never come, but I decided not to even let myself think about that.

But finally, around one in the afternoon, the front door opened.

“GERARD!” Everybody screamed out at once. Donna kissed his cheeks and smothered him in hugs, mumbling incoherently through her joyful tears. Gerard pushed her aside without saying anything. He was covered in head to toe with white ash and dust. His eyes were bloodshot and his face had that same waxy look on it the night of his hospital visit.

“I need to shower. We’re going downstairs.” He said so blankly that he sounded like a robot. Elodie, Mikey and I followed him into the basement, throwing shocked glances back at Donna and Don.

“Gerard, are you okay?” I asked cautiously once we were downstairs. He grabbed a towel out of the closet and beckoned for me to follow him into the bathroom.

“No.” he said so simply that it was scary. He turned on the hot water and once it was ready he climbed in without even taking his clothes off. I just stood there and stared, frightened by his behavior.

But then I heard a very human like sound come from inside the shower. It was a sob. He was crying. I peered inside the foggy glass to see his sitting, curled up with his head in his hands and his knees to his chest. Not knowing what else I could’ve done, I silently stepped inside the shower and sat beside him, fully dressed. I wrapped my arms around his and comforted him as best I could.

“There were bodies, fall from the building. And some lady was screaming because they had a day-care center in one of the buildings.” Gerard wailed, his voice cracking. My heart broke and collected in the bottom of my ribcage at his compassion.

“And I wanted to run away from it but I just c-couldn’t.” he confessed, choking on the last word.

“Sh, none of this is your fault Gerard. Nobody could’ve seen this coming, and I mean nobody. I know you want to save the world, but sometimes there’s just nothing we can do.” I assured him, and secretly myself.

Gerard looked up at me with sorrowful eyes that seemed to say, “thank you” before burying his face in my shoulder and letting the rest of it out.