Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > This Is Where It Starts
BABETTE
All night, Brain and I had waited in the hospital while they pumped Gerard’s stomach. Brian was there, telling me everything would be okay as I cried. After Gerard had thrown everything up, they allowed me to see him in his room. He was fast asleep and this all seemed like a bitter and familiar nightmare. All the boys heard and came in to see him, but he was still asleep. They cancelled the show that was tonight and a few others. Bert McCracken came in and I blew up at him.
“GET OUT!” I shrieked, slapping him anywhere I could reach. “Get out! Stay away from him! This is your fault!” I cried.
“What did I do?” Bert asked. that was the last straw.
“I’m gonna kill him!” I yelled, trying to pounce at Bert. Frank jumped up and had to hold me back because I would’ve strangled him with my bare hands. I didn’t care if I was making a spectacle of myself and everybody around me, I just wanted Bert to stay as far away from Gerard as possible.
“Babs! Calm down!” Frank said, yanking me backward into the room. Brian shooed Bert away and pulled me off of him. I wanted to kill him. I wanted to destroy him I was so angry. I probably would’ve done it if Frank hadn’t been holding me back so tightly. He was small, but he was strong.
I couldn’t sleep. I simply couldn’t. As the sun began to rise, and everybody left to figure out what was going to happen to the rest of the tour, I still sat in the same chair. I cried, clutching Gerard’s limp hand. I couldn’t believe he had tried to kill himself. This was such a nightmare and I just wanted to wake up to the days we would spend together and everything would've been okay again.
“Babes…” Gerard croaked out at around eleven in the morning.. I shot right up and looked at him. His purple lidded eyes were half closed and his skin looked waxy and pale.
“Gerard, do you remember last night?” I asked, sensing a bitter feeling fill my gut. Gerard shook his head. I was upset with him. I was glad he was alright, but I was angry. How could he have done this to me again?
“What am I doing here?” he asked, looking around and wincing when he saw the IV in his arm.
“You tried to kill yourself. You nearly overdosed on Xanax.” I said, my voice breaking into a thousand pieces. Gerard furrowed his brow and cupped his head in his hands.
“And you know what else you told me?” I asked, a spiteful edge to my voice as I was on the verge of tears for the thousandth time that day. Gerard shook his head and was silent. “You told me that you’ve been doing cocaine.” I said, the tears flowing from my eyes.
“No, no, no, no, no.” Gerard mumbled, shaking his head as though he had just remembered something horrible.
“Cocaine? Cocaine, Gerard? Do you know how serious this is?” I said through my cries. “You’re a drug addict Gerard! Did you know they wanted to send you to a mental hospital? You tried to end your life!”
“Babes, please.’ Gerard said pleadingly. I held up my hand.
“No, no more ‘Babes’. I can’t be your mother Gerard. I can’t take care of you like this. I just can’t do it anymore.” I said. My decision was clear and as much as it hurt me, I had to do it. A frown slid down my face as I muttered the words “You have let me down for the last time…”
“Are you…breaking up with me?” Gerard asked, sounding like a devastated teenage girl. I shook my head.
“No, but if you can’t get your act together I will. I want you to go to rehab once you leave here.” I said firmly.
“Babes, I can’t do that. We have to get to Japan-.” Gerard started.
“I don’t care about fucking Japan, alright? I just want you to get better. Please.” I begged, wiping my eyes. Gerard’s expression turned to that of a statue.
“Babes, I think you should go home. You’re exhausted. You’re stressed. Go home and take some time to rest. Please, just go home and rest.” Gerard said, putting his hand on my shoulder. He was right. I was loosing my mind from worry and lack of sleep, but something definitely seemed off about this.
“Okay…I love you.” I said, wincing through tears as I leaned over and kissed his forehead.
“I love you too, Babes.” Gerard promised.
All night, Brain and I had waited in the hospital while they pumped Gerard’s stomach. Brian was there, telling me everything would be okay as I cried. After Gerard had thrown everything up, they allowed me to see him in his room. He was fast asleep and this all seemed like a bitter and familiar nightmare. All the boys heard and came in to see him, but he was still asleep. They cancelled the show that was tonight and a few others. Bert McCracken came in and I blew up at him.
“GET OUT!” I shrieked, slapping him anywhere I could reach. “Get out! Stay away from him! This is your fault!” I cried.
“What did I do?” Bert asked. that was the last straw.
“I’m gonna kill him!” I yelled, trying to pounce at Bert. Frank jumped up and had to hold me back because I would’ve strangled him with my bare hands. I didn’t care if I was making a spectacle of myself and everybody around me, I just wanted Bert to stay as far away from Gerard as possible.
“Babs! Calm down!” Frank said, yanking me backward into the room. Brian shooed Bert away and pulled me off of him. I wanted to kill him. I wanted to destroy him I was so angry. I probably would’ve done it if Frank hadn’t been holding me back so tightly. He was small, but he was strong.
I couldn’t sleep. I simply couldn’t. As the sun began to rise, and everybody left to figure out what was going to happen to the rest of the tour, I still sat in the same chair. I cried, clutching Gerard’s limp hand. I couldn’t believe he had tried to kill himself. This was such a nightmare and I just wanted to wake up to the days we would spend together and everything would've been okay again.
“Babes…” Gerard croaked out at around eleven in the morning.. I shot right up and looked at him. His purple lidded eyes were half closed and his skin looked waxy and pale.
“Gerard, do you remember last night?” I asked, sensing a bitter feeling fill my gut. Gerard shook his head. I was upset with him. I was glad he was alright, but I was angry. How could he have done this to me again?
“What am I doing here?” he asked, looking around and wincing when he saw the IV in his arm.
“You tried to kill yourself. You nearly overdosed on Xanax.” I said, my voice breaking into a thousand pieces. Gerard furrowed his brow and cupped his head in his hands.
“And you know what else you told me?” I asked, a spiteful edge to my voice as I was on the verge of tears for the thousandth time that day. Gerard shook his head and was silent. “You told me that you’ve been doing cocaine.” I said, the tears flowing from my eyes.
“No, no, no, no, no.” Gerard mumbled, shaking his head as though he had just remembered something horrible.
“Cocaine? Cocaine, Gerard? Do you know how serious this is?” I said through my cries. “You’re a drug addict Gerard! Did you know they wanted to send you to a mental hospital? You tried to end your life!”
“Babes, please.’ Gerard said pleadingly. I held up my hand.
“No, no more ‘Babes’. I can’t be your mother Gerard. I can’t take care of you like this. I just can’t do it anymore.” I said. My decision was clear and as much as it hurt me, I had to do it. A frown slid down my face as I muttered the words “You have let me down for the last time…”
“Are you…breaking up with me?” Gerard asked, sounding like a devastated teenage girl. I shook my head.
“No, but if you can’t get your act together I will. I want you to go to rehab once you leave here.” I said firmly.
“Babes, I can’t do that. We have to get to Japan-.” Gerard started.
“I don’t care about fucking Japan, alright? I just want you to get better. Please.” I begged, wiping my eyes. Gerard’s expression turned to that of a statue.
“Babes, I think you should go home. You’re exhausted. You’re stressed. Go home and take some time to rest. Please, just go home and rest.” Gerard said, putting his hand on my shoulder. He was right. I was loosing my mind from worry and lack of sleep, but something definitely seemed off about this.
“Okay…I love you.” I said, wincing through tears as I leaned over and kissed his forehead.
“I love you too, Babes.” Gerard promised.
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