FicWad

A/N: Filler...next chapter soon.
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My eyes fluttered open in a blurry daze as I looked around my surroundings. I heard a beeping noise signify I was in a hospital as I got a closer look. The familiar sterile smell seeped its way into my nose while I tried to sit up but screamed as my lower half was practically immobile and sore. I began to panic I realized why I was here.

I remember me the rain, the car swerving in front of me, me blacking out. It all became clear as I checked myself for any injuries. To my horror my stomach was slightly flat. I felt bruises on my face as they hurt to touch.

"The baby." I whispered, oh God I lost the baby.

I felt weak and nauseous as I wanted to know that the hell happened. Where was Bob? Where was Asia?! I thought as I suddenly froze. Bob. He was the reason I was even driving in the first place. Because he was with that bitch. And that bitch, just so happen to let the whole world now what happened between them. I shook my head and started to cry since that's all I could do. Everything had gone downhill once more.

"Talisa?" a voice spoke as I looked up to see a man with a white lab coat and salt and pepper hair. "Are you okay?" he asked carefully as I nodded slowly.

"Well, you might be in shock still, you were in a car accident, do you remember?" he asked me as I nodded.

"What happened?" I whispered as he looked around nervously.

"Well Talisa, a drunk driver swerved in front of you when he lost control from the rain. Luckily the air bag blocked some of the impact or you would've been seriously injured. You suffered a minor concussion and a few bumps and bruises, but you're fine other than that. Although with the concussion, we felt it was best if we put you in a temporary coma to let you rest. It's a miracle all the same." he replied as I let it all sink in.

"I've been here for almost three days? Where's my family? Why can't I move? What about my baby?" I asked in a panic as he walked over and placed a hand on my shoulder to calm me down.

"Relax Talisa, just breathe. You're family has been here for most of the time, however I don't think they know you're awake. You can't move because you had an emergency C section." he explained as my eyes widened.

"C section?!" I said completely alert as he nodded.

"The impact of the accident caused a little bit of trauma to the baby and his heart would stop beating. If we hadn't taken him out, he would've not made it." he explained as I felt my heart drop while I chewed on my lip.

"He did make it though right?"

"Yes. But due to the fact that he's 3 months premature, he'll have to spend quite some time in the NICU until he's able to breathe on his own and is at a proper weight." he explained as I frowned and shook my head.

"Can I see him?" I asked softly.

"I would suggest you get some more rest, but if you're able to stand and walk on your own, you may see him. I'll have a nurse take you when we finish a few more tests to see that you're okay." he replied as I nodded and thanked him while he finished up and waited for a nurse to take me to the NICU. A petite woman with red hair and an olive complexion with hazel eyes greeted me as she helped me up while I struggled to stand but ignored it. I wondered where everyone was as we kept walking down the halls until we reached the double doors.

"I'm sorry to hear about your accident and your baby." she said softly as I looked at her while she half smiled at me. I didn't know what to say as I turned my head.

"If it helps, my little sister was a premature. She's 13 now, but in great health. I'm sure your baby will be the same." she added.

"Thank you." I smiled at her while the doors opened. The scene before made my stomach drop as I looked around the many incubators and saw babies with breathing tubes through their noses, blindfolds over their eyes to protect them and even the crying was too much for me.

She walked me to the last incubator while I slowly approached it. I gasped as I came in view of a very small baby that looked no more than three pounds. He had tubes coming out of his nose and body as well as a heart monitor recording every breath as I put my hand to the glass. He had my hair and the softest pink skin tone I could never forget. It was like seeing Asia for the first time, except my poor baby was small. So very small.

"Oh God." I whispered as I couldn't stop the tears falling down my face. It was all my fault. If I hadn't been driving, he wouldn't be here right now. He would be back in my stomach where he was warm and protected. What hurt even more as I knew this was karma for being so selfish. I hadn't even wanted another child and now looked what happened. I never meant for things to end so fucked up.

"Hi baby." I whispered to the small infant as he twitched slightly in his sleep while I only wanted to kiss him. I was scared to death to even think about holding him when he looked so fragile.

"You know he still needs a name." the nurse smiled at me. "Have you picked out any names yet?" she asked me as I looked at her before shaking my head.

"I can't think of one right now. There's too much going on." I replied as she nodded in understanding.

"God's going to be with him the whole time, don't you worry. He's a beautiful little angel. I'll let you bond with him and I'll check up on you later. Take it easy hun." she patted my shoulder comfortingly as she left while I turned back to the baby and my lip trembled.

"I'm so sorry." I whispered as put my forehead against the glass and kissed it. "So very sorry."
~~

"Tissa?" I heard someone say carefully as I immediately recognized the voice. I painfully turned to see Bob standing there with a bouquet of roses and a teddy bear as he looked at me.

"Hi." I said dryly. He came closer until he stopped at the incubator while his lip trembled at the side of the baby. Despite the doctors telling me to rest, I refused to go back to my room.

"Are you okay?" he asked in worried tone as I nodded.

"Is he okay?" he asked softly as I nodded once more.

"He's doing better." I assured him while he nodded. He put his hand to the glass while he sighed. It was upsetting for the both of us to be put in this position, and I wasn't quite sure if I had even wanted Bob in the same room as me.

"Where's Asia?" I asked him as he looked back at me.

"She's in the waiting room with everyone." he replied as I felt a little at ease.

"Tissa, I'm really sorry about every-" he spoke before I cut him off.

"Can we not talk this about right now?" I begged him in a whisper as he looked down before nodding as I exhaled deeply before turning back to the baby who I still hadn't picked a name for. It was official, I was driving myself insane.

God must really not like me.