Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Hugs

Dissolve, Desire

by IcyBlues 1 review

From one persons poison to anothers

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres:  - Published: 2010-12-08 - Updated: 2010-12-08 - 1244 words - Complete

GERARD: It was like my brain was fizzing away, like sherbet on your tongue, but inexplicably better, evaporating and shrinking rapidly. At first I had a splitting headache, it felt like my brain was swelling up but it melted into the background noise. I took quick, deep drags, wanting to suck up as much of the feeling as I could, coughs exploding through my lungs. My hands were shaking like hell too, to no surprise. I wanted to do something, anything, I had all this crazy energy but I flet liek I moved in slow motion.
Shane watched wordlessly. He just observed me spiraling up and down. I began coughing badly and he petted my head absentindedly.

"You'll get used to it." I saw him grin out the corner of my eye. He's amazing, awesome. I mean, given me this, in exchange for somethng he'd never get! Pretty stupid of him. I stared up at him, a frozen grin on my face. The whole world was wapred beyond belief, I almost forgot which reality I was in.
I got up, swaying a little.
"So you think it's so great?" I jabbed a finger in his direction. Something else caught my attention.
"Oh my- Shit, look!" I noticed some gloves in the corner of the room. "I have golves!" I yelled, letting out a roaring laugh, fingering them carelessly, the nylon-y material felt something like silk.
"Bet you do." Shane tipped his head back to continue watching me, amused by my clumsy hyperactivity.
"You like screwing, don't you Gerard?" he asked.
"What?!" I looked up at him from my feet.
"We both do. I can tell it. I bet Mikey does, but I know who he wants to be screwed by. Well, he even told me!"
"What? Who?!"
"Well it was a secret, telling you might put me at a disadvantage Gerard." Shane shook his head in fake disappointment.
I stubbed out the very end of the cigarette on my arm, not really intending to, but because I was fidgety.
"Just tell me, is no big problem." I insisted, turning around to face Shane properly now.
"He insisted that it had to be you, Gerard." Shane winked at me, and I was utterly clueless if that was true but my state at the time told me it must be true.
"Sss! So what?" I shurgged, dropping the butt to the floor carelessly.
"Only mentioning. Hey, I'll get you home when you're done being a faggot down there." Shane took a sip of beer while monitoring me carefully.
"I don't need your charity! And plus, you're a fag too." I giggled at his choice of words.
"You'd fuck anyone anytime." I added.

Shane nodded, consumed in a complicated and insane plan of events. Like how he'd continue to do this to Gerard, get Mikey would run from him and how he'd get Frank to stay at his house because Gerard would turn out to be an addicted asshole. Actual perverts really aren't dumb, especially organized ones like Shane. He's never even been suspected by the police for any of his crimes. Totally clean by law, inhumanly dirty in actions.

It's only moral to say he's inhuman in actions, but Shane is driven by the most human thing of all: desire. Try to think of one person without some kind of desire. All we do is because of desire. Desire to love, avenge, kill, prosper. We are the keys to our innermost cravings. And what makes people happy? Fufilling thier desires. It's surprising this is all contained in chemicals. Is it?
Mikey is driven by desire to feel human, accepted and properly loved without doubts. He craves love, in any form. Wanting to restrain, but unable to hold back his grovelling for love from his brother and experimenting with daring feelings for Frank. Flattered anyone would go for him, after all, Mikey's brother told him often how lucky he is that at least his brother loves him. He'd been told for so long that being isolated was his normality.
Frank, trying to change himself; to forget his past for his love, Gerard, while still wanting more from others. An unsatiable desire to be appreciated and, inside, curious about consequences. A stupid part of him wondering about playing dirty with others, the monster inside that would wreck his life if he ever listened to it.
So is Shane all that different? Maybe he is. All he knows is his primal instincs to capture. Malicious beast with a kind streak.
He dropped Gerard off outside his house when it seemed most of the drugs had done thier worst.
"Thanks, sugar...plum fairy." Gerard mumbled. "I'll use that more." He mentally noted out-loud.
"Bye." Shane called, rolling up the window again. Everything was going just as intended. It was great when things went smoothly for him. Shane could barely wait to get his hands on Mikey and Frank again. All he had to do was to get Gerard hooked and dependant, so he'd beg and do anything for his preffered poison. He'd seen it happen pretty quickly: people get utterly addicted to the stuff.
Both Shane and Gerard thought they were winning this fight. So, in a way, they kind of were.

MIKEY: I was awakened from my shallow, but good dream. I heard my bedroom door creak open.
I mumbled, clinging on to the last strands of my embarassingly enjoyable dream. I tried to keep the dream going.
"Mikey." Gerard shook me gently. "My fuck boy." Not another blush-inducing, but frustrating drunken appearance by Gerard again... When'll he learn it hurts me so bad? He won't because if he knew it hurt because I actually half wanted those sort of things off him he'd probably... Punish me?

I mumbled and groaned. "You're drunk, piss off."
"But Mikey, I - luuve you!" He collapsed on top of me. "And I know how you love me." He nuzzled the back of my neck. I could do nothing with him on top while I lay on my front damn it!
"What'd you do Gee?" I asked, scared already. "Drink?"
"Oh, no." he replied enthusiastically. "I know though, Mikey. I know all about'cha now!"
I wriggled uncomfortably.
"What do you mean?!" I wheezed, struggling to breathe. I enjoyed him on top of my bare back too much. Gerard sat up on me and stroked my arm. Sometimes he just says stuff like that to put me on edge. Works everytime, him being him and me being me.

"Oh, you know. That thing." Surely Gerard was lying, being so vague. He began rubbing my shoulders, in between nuzzling them. I shivered, containing my happiness as best I could.
"Mikey-Moo, Mikey-Moe, Mikey-Ikey..." Gerard muttered. He kissed my shoulderblade, jolting me wide-awake. "You go make Shane happy. Promise?" he asked, the tip of his tongue on the base of my neck.
"I promise!" I said in a high voice, hoping it might get him off me quicker. It carried on up my neck.
"He's drunk", I told myself, "He gets turned on at everyone when he's drunk!"
"Oh my, Mikey boy." Gee sang softly. "I like sleeping with you and Frank. Three of us." I barely heard Gerard's random mutters as his arms coursed my body.
"Why, I could go right now and say, 'hey, Frank come sleep here.' and he'd say 'Yeah, lets go sleep together'." Gerard sounded overjoyed as he entertained himself.
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