Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > "You'll never fit in much, kid."

Chapter Seventeen

by CosmicZombie 15 reviews

The voices in Gerard's head, porcupines and Art competitions...

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG-13 - Genres: Drama,Humor,Romance - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way - Published: 2011-04-02 - Updated: 2011-04-02 - 2115 words

Hey my wonderful readers :) sorry I haven’t updated- as you know things are a little tricky at the moment, but thankfully the easter holidays have started now (for some reason, in Scotland they happen way before easter) which hopefully means I’ll be able to update more often. THANK YOU SOO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWS :D you guys really are amazing- your reviews really keep me going :) phew, so glad I’ve got this written- I’ve literally only just had time to post this- my dad’s kicking me off the computer now :( anyway, this chapter took me ages, so hope you enjoy and pleeease remember to R&R! thank you xD

Chapter Seventeen

Gerard’s point of view:

The purply, Autumnal twilight seeping through the confinements of my blood-red curtains is peaceful; the background noise of raindrops pounding steadily against the window pane calming; the soft, lyrical, melodic notes of a Misfits acoustic album floating out of the stereo relaxing; the solitary, velvety silence of the night soothing.
The emotions that stung so close to the surface this afternoon have dulled a little, retreating back into the depths of my chest, but leaving me feeling all churned up with the feelings I usually keeps so well hidden, I don’t always recognise them myself when they actually emerge.
The uncomfortable jitteriness I’ve been feeling ever since my confession to Bee has also faded a little as I sit in the calming, familiar surroundings of my dark, cluttered bedroom, breathing deeply. However, I haven’t spent the majority of the evening in the slightly calmer state I’m in now…
Since I arrived home, feeling more confused than a penguin in a desert, I’ve been unable to settle and do something for more than ten minutes maximum; I started off watching TV in the living room, switching channels every thirty seconds and driving Mikey crazy. When he eventually suggested that my dissatisfaction with whatever channel we were watching was because I was ‘daydreaming about a certain special someone who’s name begins with F’, smirking in that infuriating way only Mikey can smirk, the TV remote suddenly became magnetically attracted to his head.
Seriously, what the hell is the point in younger siblings?! All they seem to do is electrocute themselves, steal your CDs, and make you wish throttling family members is legal.
Anyway, after storming from the living room, I boiled the kettle to make coffee, got distracted, ambled upstairs and listened to Green Day for five minutes.
Got bored and switched to Amen.
Got fidgety and switched to Nirvana.
Got impatient and switched to The Misfits.
Got frustrated, decided I was being ridiculous and turned the CD player off.
I attempted starting on a piece of artwork to enter for the school competition which is held every year to raise money for charity.
Couldn’t concentrate on that, so started sorting my comics, got bored, threw them at the wall, deciding I was being an absolutely ridiculous, love sick, hormonally challenged, Frank obsessed teenager.
I switched The Misfits back on, sat on my bed and decided to try meditation to calm my crazed mind.
As it turns out, meditation is, quite frankly-
Frankly?! Of all the words, seriously…why the fuck does everything have to be Frank-related?!
-shit. I thought it was meant to clarify your mind!
Okay, I’m slightly less hyperactively jittery than I was earlier, but I’ve bitten all the nails on my left hand down to the quick and given my left leg cramp from jiggling it nervously up and down so much.
My thoughts are flapping round my mind, like tiny, winged, black bats, swooping and twirling before I can catch hold of them, too many to focus on a solitary one.
You like Frank-
Yes, but he doesn’t like you-
He hung out with you-
Yes, but he’s not gay-
Bee thinks he is-
What would she know?-
She knew about you-
I am you!-
Well why the hell are there two of us if you’re me?-
I don’t know, it’s your mind!-
Well apparently it’s yours too-
Are you calling me crazy?-
No, I’m calling you gay-


I jump violently, and all the voices in my head finally shut up as I glance at the screen of my laptop.

CrazyCat228: Hello, my little bloodsucking munchkin :P how was your day?

I exhale shakily with relief. Cat. Thank god. She always seems to know what to do, not to mention if it had been Frank’s name instead of hers, I’d probably have had a heart attack. Or thrown the laptop out the window. And all the voices in my head would have started yelling.

CoffeeAddict13: cat. Thank god! I’ve never been more glad to hear from you…the voices in my head won’t leave me alone! And my day way pretty weird tbh. You?

CrazyCat228: haha, glad to hear I’m not the only one with voices in their head :P my day was boring as usual lol. Why was yours weird??

CoffeeAddict13: tons of reasons. I hung out with Frank…

CrazyCat228: ooooh! Really?! How was it?

CoffeeAddict13: umm…he kinda choked on the sweet I gave him and for a few moments, I actually thought he was going to die D:

CrazyCat228: wow, you really need to work on your flirting techniques, don’t you? I somehow don’t think choking your crush is gunna get the best results.

CoffeeAddict13: I wasn’t flirting!

CrazyCat228: suuuure xD well, apart from that teeny tiny glitch, how was it?

CoffeeAddict13: cool. Okay, that’s an understatement. It was FRANKING AWESOME!!

CrazyCat228: awwww! xD wait, if it was so awesome, why did you just say your day was weird?

CoffeeAddict13: it just was…don’t laugh, but I actually got up at six, showered, washed and straightened my hair, wore new clothes and got to school on time…

CrazyCat228: I’m not laughing.

CoffeeAddict13: good.

CrazyCat228: I’m having a heart attack.

CoffeeAddict13: lol I kinda freaked myself out too…not to mention Mikey xD

CrazyCat228: this is just not RIGHT! You are still Gerard Way, right?

CoffeeAddict13: shut up, course I am. Unfortunately. Okay, Bee kinda knows…

CrazyCat228: about Frankiepooh?

CoffeeAddict13: don’t call him that!!

CrazyCat228: sorry. Frankiekins?

CoffeeAddict13: >:(

CrazyCat228: okay, okay, sorry! What happened with Bee?

CoffeeAddict13: well, I think she kinda noticed how I acted around him when we were all hanging out at breaktime today- she’s scarily observant about people.

CrazyCat228: rather than about porcupines?

CoffeeAddict13: wtf?!

CrazyCat228: sorry, just felt like it xD carry on :P

CoffeeAddict13: right, well when it was just us two after school, she asked me if I liked him, and I knew it was pointless lying to her…

CrazyCat228: how did she take it?

CoffeeAddict13: she actually nearly made me cry.

CrazyCat228: WHAT?! fetches baseball bat right, where does she live?!

CoffeeAddict13: no, no she was just so sweet and kind and understanding about it- that’s why I got all upset.

CrazyCat228: jeez, you get more and more like a pregnant girl with severe mood swings every day!

CoffeeAddict13: oi!

CrazyCat228: xD

CoffeeAddict13: thing is, after talking to Bee, actually saying it out loud to someone, I sorta realised how totally fucked I am.

CrazyCat228: ??

CoffeeAddict13: I have a huge fucking crush on my fucking Biology lab partner who’s a fucking GUY!

CrazyCat228: point taken :P just joking xD what did Bee actually say?

CoffeeAddict13: she…she thinks he likes me too.

CrazyCat228: what do you think?

CoffeeAddict13: well it obviously can’t be true!!

CrazyCat228: but there’s a tiny part of you that believes it is?

CoffeeAddict13: fuck, you know me too well :/ but it’s so STUPID for me to think that!

CrazyCat228: why? You just said yourself that Bee is scarily observant with people. Why wouldn’t she be right?

CoffeeAddict13: because it’s fucking impossible!

CrazyCat228: I’m going with Bee, but maybe don’t kiss him just yet xD


“Fuck!” I jump, nearly having a heart attack. I really should change my message alert to one that doesn’t scare the living shit out of me every time it goes off.
The whole heart attack situation isn’t really helped when I see the name that’s popped up on the screen.

!FreakyFrankie!: hey, howz it going? xD

Trying not to have a full out hyperventilating-stomach lurching- butterfly attack, I type out a shaky reply to Cat’s message.

CoffeeAddict13: ummm, I gotta go get murdered by a tribe of hobnailed boot-wearing butterflies that have decided to attack my insides. See you later.

CrazyCat228: Frank talking to you?

CoffeeAddict13: yep.


Frank’s point of view:

I press the ‘enter’ key and exhale shakily, not entirely sure as to why my heart is suddenly crashing against my ribcage, why my palms are clammy and trembling or why my stomach had suddenly decided to become a hyperactive gymnast on speed.
I didn’t think colds were usually like this…
I nibble my nails nervously, staring at the screen of my laptop, willing it to light up with a message. Again, the reason as to why I’m so anxious for Gerard to reply unclear. All I know is that today has been one of the best days I can remember; how amazing it feels to have friends, real friends- not the kind who sneer at me, who wear down my confidence, who needle me with cutting, cruel comments- it feels so wonderful to hang out with people who actually seem to appreciate who I am, people I’m not afraid to be myself around.
However, for some reason, I can’t stop Gerard’s crooked, amused grin creeping into my thoughts; his long, white, spidery fingers and how they felt on mine, his startling, unique, almost enchanting greeny-hazel eyes that shimmer magically in the Autumn light, intelligent, artistic and creative-


I jump out of my skin, tearing the nail I’ve been biting, and blushing like I’ve just been caught thinking something forbidden.

CoffeeAddict13: good thanks, you?

I take a deep breath and type a reply, heart thumping nonsensically,

!FreakyFrankie!: good thanks :) hey, uh, thanks for letting me hang out with you guys today…

CoffeeAdduct13: no problem- it was awesome :)

!FreakyFrankie!: :D

CoffeeAddict13: hey, do you maybe wanna meet up tomorrow after school for the biology thing? I mean, if you aren’t busy.

My heart leaps.
Seriously, what the fuck is up with ne today?!

!FreakyFrankie!: sure :D

CoffeeAddict13: awesome :) meet at the lockers?

!FreakyFrankie!: yeeeeep xD so, wuu2?

CoffeeAddict13: trying to think of what to do for my entry for the art competition at school- it has to be in by tomorrow…eeek!

!FreakyFrankie!: cool, what’s it gunna be like?

CoffeeAddict13: I think it’s gunna be like this dead, blackened, gnarled old tree dripping blood and stuff with like, evil creatures peeking out from the branches and stuff- the theme is supernatural.

!FreakyFrankie!: wow, sounds amazing!

CoffeeAddict13: thanks xD

“Frank!” Mom’s call makes me start and look away from the computer screen.
“Yeah?” I shout back.
“Time for you to go to sleep- I’m about to turn the internet off.”
I sigh. “Okay.”

!FreakyFrankie!: shit, I gotta go- Mom’s turning the internet off :(

CoffeeAddict13: oh, that sucks D:

!FreakyFrankiee!; ikr. Kk, byee x

CoffeeAddict13: see you :) xx

My heart starts thumping again as I look at the two tiny black x, but yet again I ignore it.
I sigh, turn my computer off and wander over to the window.
The persistent rain has finally ceased; the dusky sky is now a clear, purply blue, but I notice there are blackened, blemished looking clouds lurking ominously at the horizon, adding a dark, sinister quality to the peaceful, pretty, dwindling light of the Autumn sunset.
Like a warning.
A dark omen.

So what did you think? Please tell me what bits you liked/ didn’t like. I’m sorry if this chapter was kinda shitty- I know nothing much has happened yet, but trust me, the next few chapters will be very interesting xD thank you so much for reading! :D love you guys and really sorry if my writing is getting shit :/

CosmicZombie xo

p.s. I recently wrote a funny oneshot- here’s the link and if you could read, rate and review it, I’d be really grateful :) hope you like!
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