Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > We can lose ourselves.

We can lose ourselves.

by Unicorns-are-real 5 reviews

Hi my name's Gerard Way. I'm thirteen years old and trapped in a mental hospital.

Category: My Chemical Romance - Rating: PG - Genres: Angst - Characters: Frank Iero,Gerard Way,Mikey Way - Published: 2011-04-26 - Updated: 2011-04-26 - 1314 words

Hi, my name's Gerard Way. I'm thirteen years old and trapped in a mental hospital.

They think I'm insane.

But I'm not.

I do not scream often, I do not harm other people very much and I do not rave like most of the people here.

It's just the voice in my head, the other me. He tells me to do things, bad, bad things. He tells me to hurt people.

He told me to hurt my brother.

He told me to hurt Mikey.

And I did it.

My name is Gerard Way. This is my story.


Mikey was playing his guitar in his room again. For a ten year old, he is really talented at it.

You can't play guitar. Came the voice in my head.
"Shut up!" I whispered and continued my drawing. No one believed me about the voice, they thought I just had an imagenary friend. They thought it was sweet, that it was 'adorable'.

But there is nothing sweet and adorable about it. He tells me to do stuff. Tells me to hurt people and behave badly.
You're jealous that you can't play guitar like your brother. All you do is sit and draw. Where's drawing gonna get you, Gerard? Your brother will do so much better than you if you allow him to keep playing. He could be famous, in the spotlight. And where would that leave you?
I blanked it out and pressed harder on the pencil, I was drawing Batman. Batman is awsome, he is strong and brave and cool. He has a jet black car called the 'Batmobile' and sidekick called 'Robin'. They go on loads of adventures and battle villains such as 'The Riddler' and 'Two-Faced Harvey' and (my favourite) 'The Joker'. They would get into fights and beat eachother up and sometimes the comic would end on a cliffhanger and you had to wait and see if Batman would be okay; he always did save they day, but that is what makes Batman different: you can ALWAYS rely on Batman!

I know why I'm thinking all this.

I don't want the voice to speak to me.

Mikey is still playing his bass and it seems louder than ever before. I know that I'm getting angry. I know that the voice is trying to get a hold of my mind. I won't allow it to. I won't hurt Mikey.

I press harder on my pencil and the lead snapped. The noise was so loud it hurt my head, mum began to sing downstairs, dad was playing with the dog, making it bark, Mikey was still playing that Goddamn bass!!!
I gripped my face with my hands, my drawing fell off the bed thudding to the floor. So much noise, so much NOISE!!!

Do it, let me in! I'll stop the noise!

I stood up, suddenly calm. I stepped over my drawing and walked to Mikey's room. I knocked the door and let myself in. Mikey stopped strumming momentarily and looked up at me through his glasses, smiling; happy to see me.
"Hey, Gee. What's up?"
I looked at him and returned the grin.
"Mikey, put your guitar away. I have to tell you something important."
Mikey nodded, suddenly serious. Sometimes I wondered why he wasn't the older sibling, he was always more responsible and mature than I.

And he believed I was telling the truth about the voice in my head.

He knelt down and placed his bass inside its box. As soon as he put his hands in I snapped.

I kicked the case shut on his fingers. He cried out, screaming.
"It's not fair!!!" I wailed as Mikey brought his fingers to his chest, crying. "You're so talented! I want to be talented too! I want to be famous! I want to be in the spotlight! I don't want to be left behind!"

I fell on the floor, hugging myself. Oh God, I'd hurt Mikey.

What had I done?

"Mikey, I'm sorry!" I sobbed.

"I-it's okay Gee. It was the voice wasn't it?" He whispered, biting his lip against the pain.

"Have I broke them?" I asked, looking at his fingers.

He nodded,
"I think so. Gee, I think you need help."

As if on cue, mom and dad came running into the room, my sister Eliza not far behind them.
Mom ran straight to Mikey, inspecting his hand. Dad came over to me and pulled me into a hug.
"Why did you do it son?" He asked. I buried my face into him.
"The voice dad, the voice said to..." I sniffled. Dad sighed and patted my shoulder,
"We are gonna get this sorted Gerard. We're gonna get rid of this voice once and for all, okay?"

I nodded and mom rang a number. Eliza sat beside me, stroking my hair and singing 'Twinkle, twinkle, little star.' I laughed, she was only five, she had no clue about what was happening.
Mikey came over, his hand bandaged up.
"I'm so sorry." I whispered. "I guess they're gonna send me away aren't they?" I asked. Mikey nodded solemly,
"It'll only be for a while though; until this voice is gone for sure."
"I'll miss you Mikey."
"I'll miss you too Gee."

"I'll miss you as well Eliza." I said, looking down at the little blonde haired girl who had gotten bored of 'Twinkle, twinkle little star.' and was much more content singing 'Baa, baa, black sheep."

Mom came in and dad was behind her, holding two bags.
"Darling, you're going away for a while. You'll get better, I promise."
She took me away from Mikey and Eliza, leading me down the staircase and to the open front door. Two men were stood there.

One had sandy blonde hair and soft blue eyes, he smiled at me as I approached them. The other had fluffy hair that sat on his head in a circular shape, kind of like a brown sheep. His dark eyes shone warmly and he held out a hand. He was dressed in all white, a stethescope slung round his neck and a watch clipped to his front pocket.
I took his hand.

"Hey there Gerard. I'm Doctor Toro, but you can call me Ray. I'm going to be your doctor. My assisstant is Doctor Bryar, but you can call him Bob." Doctor Ray smiled, "Now your mother tells me that you've been hearing a voice in your head?"

I nodded.

"And he tells you to hurt people?"

I nodded again.

"And you hurt your brother because the voice said to?"

I nodded one final time. I liked Doctor Ray and Bob, they were nice.

"Now," Said Doctor Bob. "Do you want to stay awake when we take you to the hospital or do you want us to give you something so you can sleep?"

"I-I'll stay awake." I said.

NO! Sleep! Then we can plan how to escape these jerks! Screeched the voice in my head.

"Shut up!" I hissed and Ray threw a worried glance at Bob. Bob held out his hand and I took it.
"Maybe we should get going?" He asked. They lead me out the door an down the drive to a white van parked up against the curb. A red cross was painted on the side and I turned to look at my parents one last time.

"We love you sweetie! Get better soon!" My mom called, blowing a kiss and dad waved.

Bob and Ray opened the doors and I clambered in. I heard the lock click then the engine start as they carted me off to God knows where...

This was kind of a random thing my mate asked me to write, I hoped you liked it! :D R&R please if you want me to continue or if I need to improve it in any way! :)

-Sara xoxo
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