FicWad

Alright, this chapter took me awhile to write, I hope you all like it, and also thaks VelocityBandit for your review! But enjoy you guys (:

Chapter 14: Starbucks
Paige's POV

Four cigarettes and two Carmel Macchiato later I saw Lindsay's silver car speed in to the closet parking space she could find, which was pretty far. She quickly got out of her car and ran up to the small circular table I was sitting at in front of the Starbucks. I got up to greet her, but she didn't speak she just embraced me with a giant hug. I started to tear up, my mom and I never hugged, we never showed any affection towards one another. But this moment made me feel loved, having someone who I loved like family comforting me was something I wasn't accustomed to. I had felt a lot better than I did from when I left my house just from a simple hug. My face was buried in Lindsay's burgundy red dyed hair, it smelt of apples, and it felt as soft as silk against my cheek. We stayed for a minute or so until I broke away from the hug, wiping my eyes profusely.

"Are you okay? What happened? Do you need somewhere to stay"? She took off her white ray bans with black polka dots and stared at me with her blue-green eyes.

I must've really worried Lindsay because she had never been this concerned about the problems with my mom. We usually just talk about it and leave it be, but this time I could feel the fear in her voice for me.

"Yeah, it was just the usual shit she fucking pulls. She called me a whore, worthless, but this time she slapped me in my face." I rubbed the area of my cheek where I had felt the burn of my mother's hand earlier, and just the thought of it made me the pain spontaneously recover to my cheek.

"Oh god, are you fucking serious. What the hell do you do wrong, fucking nothing Paige. Why are you still there? For fuck sake come and stay with me for awhile." Lindsay said, she sounded angry, her eyes quickly went from worried to fill with infuriation.

I have never told her about the times my mom tried to kill me when she was going through her night terror phase. Lindsay would have lost it then, she would never let me go home and I knew that.

"I can't leave, they won't pay for my college if I move out. I need a future so I can as fucking far away from this place as I can. Things will calm down by the time I get home anyway. They always do." I started tearing up again. My voice was shaking, I just titled my head down and looked at the table. I quickly pulled out another cigarette.

"How many?" Lindsay questioned.

"How many what?" I looked back at her confused, I could feel the tear rolling down my face. I quickly raised my hand to it, and quickly wiped it off my face.

"How many cigarettes have you had?" She asked, she knew I smoked a lot more than usual when I was upset.

"This is my fifth" I bit my lip and looked at her.

"Haha, holy shit, you better save up, you are so not bumming off me tonight, I am going to need them to deal with whatever the hell we are going to do to make you happy." she said laughing. I smiled, it felt good to smile after what had just happened at my house.

Wait ...what did she mean by tonight.. Oh shit I forgot, today was our last day of school. I guess I forgot after everything that happened today with my mom and before that Gerard. Oh my god Gerard, I had totally forgotten about Gerard, then I suddenly started to grin, I could feel my face painting itself alight pink color. I was blushing...again! I couldn't even count the amount of times I had blushed today, I was seriously turning into one of those smitten teenage girls. But I kind of liked it, I liked that Gerard could make my stomach flutter with butterflies and whenever I saw him I couldn't think about anything else. He made me happy, just plain happy. That's all I have ever wanted from a boy, and I can't think of any other guy that I wanted to give me my happiness.

"Paige, you are coming out tonight. You really need too." she said like she was concerned for my safety. It worried me.

"Lindsa--" Once again I was cut off, damn what is it with today I can't seem to finish a fucking sentence.

"Woah, what I small fucking town" I heard Ray's voice from the parking lot. I turned to look at him, his fro was blowing in the wind, very majestically I might add. Behind him as always was Bob.

"Hey what are you guys doing here?" Bob questioned as he walked towards Lindsay and I, the sun hit his shaggy blonde hair making it sparkle perfectly in the sun.

"Well my mom had one of her psycho freak outs again, so I thought what better way to handle it than coffee and cancer sticks." I said aloofly, my eyes shifted back down to the table, it was like the metal was a magnet for my eyes, pulling my eyes back each time I felt I was going to cry.

Ray had obviously noticed this, he was strangely intuitive when it came to people. He could just look at someone and tell you exactly why someone had problems and what a person's problems were. Everyone always underestimated Ray, and I hated that. Beneath that goofy exterior and enormous fro, Ray was a really smart guy. He knew not to draw attention to the situation so he just changed the topic.

"Well, since 4 out of 7 of us are here, why don't we decide what we wanna do tonight, yeah?" Ray pulled out a chair and had sat down by the time he had finished his sentence. He waved his hand to Bob gesturing him to sit down too.

"The man with the plan, Ray Toro" Bob said and smiled as he made his way to the chair.

We all laughed, Bob pulled a chair out, filling in the last available place at the table, completing the circle. Bob was tall a muscular, he spoke the least in our group, but just enough to where we loved him. He hated cameras, whenever one was around he would smack it away or tend to smash it. I watched them all talk about ideas for later that night. I really didn't listen my mind, as it has been the past few days were somewhere else. I could not stop thinking about Gerard and what he was doing. How I wanted to see him so bad, I knew he would be the one cheer me up from everything that happened today. He wouldn't even have to speak, just the sight of his ebony hair, porcelain skin, his hazel eyes, and that menacing smirk that made me weak in the knees every time I gazed upon it. When I was around him, I felt happy, safe, giddy, flustered, and passionate. Sometimes, I scared myself with how much I was feeling. I took my mind out of my thoughts of the dreamy Gerard Way and just kept listening to Ray, Bob, and Lindsay talk. I didn't say a word, I just sat there. Silent.

"Comic book store!" Ray suggested excitedly.

"No, we went there last week, let's do something crazy." Lindsay replied, shooting Ray down, he had a brief look of disappointment, but he quickly shook it off.

"I know!" Lindsay continued mischievously, "Let's fork that bitch Sarah Evan's yard!"

"Naaah." Bob protested, "Some guys in my US class talked about doing that tonight, a lot of people have it out for her. Why don't we just get a case of beer, some vodka, and just see where the night takes us.." Bob said raising his eyebrows slyly with a French accent.

"Haha actually, I agree. I think we are in need for a celebration, after all we are done with the hell hole they call high school." Ray said patting Bob on the back, grinning.

"Yeah sounds good to me." Lindsay also agreed. "Paige, what do you think?" She turned to me, waiting for me to answer.

I know that she wanted me to say yes, I could see it in her eyes, she wanted me to just forget about everything that had happened. I looked over into Ray's chocolate brown eyes. I could see he felt the same as Lindsay. I then took a quick glance at Bob, he was staring at the pastel blue sky, clueless as to what was happening. Which didn't shock me, Bob and Mikey usually didn't pick on things like this, they just usually found out when we all would talk about things in the same room.

"I don't know you guys, I feel like I should just stay in tonight., I am not really in the drinking mood." I said anxiously.

"Are you sure? I think you really need to be distracted from everything. Plus, I really don't want to be involved in a sausage fest." Lindsay said sincere but humorously at the same time.

"Yeah, I just need to be by myself tonight, but you guys have fun. But I am going to go, text me tomorrow okay Lindsay?" I grinned a bit, Lindsay nodded her head, understanding that I really did need time for myself. I walked quickly to my car and drove home.


The whole way home I could feel my stomach doing flips, I was conflicted. A part of me wanted to go out and get wasted to the point where I wouldn't be able to remember anything that happened with my mom. But at the same time, I knew that was no way to deal with my issues. I did the whole drunken constantly, self harming thing before. It was something I didn't want to return to. So I only drank when I knew I wouldn't go overboard and do something I'd regret. I had learned my lesson after New Years Eve my junior year. Things hadn't been going well at home, and I had been dealing with it by going out every night during break and getting wasted to the point where I would black out. Then on New Years Eve my friend Ashley and I went to a party. It was huge, one of the ones you'd see in a fucking teen movie. We had went to a smaller party before, but we left everyone was just standing around. But I had already gotten buzzed. We got out of the car, walked up the grassy lawn I could feel the winter breezed blow against my face. The house smelt of cigarette shorts and vomit, but I didn't care I just wanted another beer. Then another beer turned into seven beers. My vision had become blurry, it was like I was trying to see underwater. I was stumbling all over the place, until I finally tripped into this guy. His name was Steven, he was really sweet and cute, and by the time the ball dropped we had started making out. He then took me upstairs... and I don't think I need to go into detail about what happened next. So I just always get down to the basic thing, I lost my virginity that night, I am honestly surprised that I even remembered in the first place. I remember the pain I had felt, not just from losing it.. But from giving it away to someone I hadn't even cared about. I felt like a fucking whore for months, my mom eventually found out, and has never looked at me the same. I regret it so much, and if I could go back I would change everything I did that day.

I remember when I told Gerard a week later, I had snuck out of my house that night, and it was a Saturday. I walked over to Gerard's, as I walked I could feel the cold sending chills down my spine. I wondered how Gerard would look at me after I told him. I mean him and Rebecca had done it a bunch, and this is when they were still dating. I got to Gerard's and tapped on his basement window. He quickly rose from his bed, flicked the latch open, and pushed the window open. I slid through and jumped onto the floor. Gerard took my hand and sat me on his soft bed. He looked into my eyes concerned and asked what was wrong. I told him everything, sobbing the whole through. When I finished he let me lean my head on his shoulder and just cry. He stoked my chestnut brown hair, and just whispered to me how everything was going to be fine. He was there to comfort me, and I enjoyed it. My head was buried in his raven black hair, it smelt of lavender, and his pale white skin was soft against mine. He told me that, he didn't look at me any differently, how even though I had done something I felt was awful it was okay because I could learn and move on. That's probably the only good thing that came out of this whole experience. Gerard and I grew even closer than we already were, ever since that night we told each other everything.

I gotten home, I pulled my car into the driveway, I rested my head against the polyester seat for a couple minutes praying my mom would be a sleep. I walked into the house and listened for any sound. There was nothing, I was lucky today. I went upstairs and happily greeted the deep sleep that awaited me.

Mikey's POV

It was almost six, and I was getting ancy waiting for a response from Ray, I had texted him about what we were going to do tonight. Suddenly my phone lit up.

New Message from Ray Toro:
Hey Mikes! So I ran into Paige and Lindsay at Starbucks with Bob, and we all decided to just get some beer and stuff and just chill out tonight sound good? Well Paige won't be there she wants to just have some time alone tonight. We can all drink at Bob's house, his mom is straight with it, and his parents are leaving for Cancun tonight. So if you're down meet us at Bob's at 8 or so!

I texted Ray back telling him I'd be there. I went downstairs and hopped in the shower. I the hot water felt refreshing as it clashed with my skin. I sang the Misfits while I washed my hair, letting my mind drift away with its own thoughts. I hopped out wrapped a towel around my torso and went and got dressed. I put on some plain blue skinny jeans and threw on a Black Flag shirt. I went downstairs to get Gee, I stumbled down the basement steps and into Gee's pitch black room, and I could see his silhouette moving gently up and down. He was obviously in a deep sleep, and he was looking like a corpse lately so he needed the rest. I didn't want to wake him up, plus Paige wasn't going to be there so I don't think he would have wanted to go anyway. I wrote him a note telling him where I was going, and if he wanted too come to just let me know. I ran upstairs said bye to my mom and was out the door.


Well I hope you guys liked it! I feel like the last part with Mikey was a little shitty, but I just wanted you guys to see some more of him than you have. But I'll update soon. R&R I'd really appreciate it!