Categories > Original > Drama
My vlog type thing?
0 reviewsNot my chem, for people who are on mmy page, but why i'm upset and not writting.
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I’m sorry I haven’t updated. But, I need to rage, so here it is-
My Brother/ why I’m sad about leaving.
My nana and my brother are still in Kingsland Georgia. So how can I leave them? I begged my parents that I could stay till the end of summer, they said no. Let me tell you why I wanted to stay. I was scared, for my brother-
My brother is an ex pill popper and moved in with us about 3 years ago with his dog Paige. I loved that dog like my own. We also left her. He started coming home high. I had lost all respect and well hope in my brother. One day, he had a car accident. He drove my Dad’s car into my (ex) friend’s mailbox. Some how, Nick and I were better friends after the incident. (?)
Well, once he got clean (With a few suicide attempts. Gun to head, didn’t shoot himself. The mailbox thing wasn’t an accident. And so on..) we started hanging out. He’s a 27yearold metal head who plays in Transpose. A local band in the south. We went to gigs together (When my father let me) and he hung out with me. One night we went to get burgers, he said something, and I asked “Why? Why did you do it?” He shook his head, but told me. He said people lost hope, and didn’t think of him as a good person anymore. I told him I lost respect, he just turned and said “I did too Vic.” He was devastated when we moved, it left him home less. But he’s been there before.
When he started packing his things (The same night) I helped. I helped him move his clothes; I kept his favorite moves and Tapes. I especially kept SLC Punk’s. Which taught me EVERYTHING! I know about Punk Mus. See, I listen to a type of ‘pop punk’ not ‘punk’ or ‘emo’. He taught me that. He told me he didn’t care if he died tomorrow, but he was over the attempts to die. “I don’t want a real job, I want my music. I worked so hard on it. It’s all I care about anymore.” He says. I believe him.
But my father, he doesn’t like my brother. I think he’s kind of mad he isn’t his. My mom wasn’t seeing my dad when Tim was born. I think he doesn’t love him. I really don’t. He always says stuff like “He is a coward, or to selfish to kill himself” or “He wants pity” and “Why would he tell a 12 year old this? He’s trying to get you, like he did your mom and nana.” I know somehow this is true. He needs pity, to feel superior though. I defend him, and ask my dad to not talk about him in front of me, he just says I need to know the truth. All I want is to leave the truth for dead. Tim has changed his life. I love him as my full brother, and NOTHING will change that.
So how can a 12 year old deal with this? I block ALL of it out. There’s a LOT more to it. But when I need to think, I usually think of my brother. It helps to think of when he’s love able, and not when he’s on something. Because, that makes me sad. But of course.
Life goes on. And no one can tell me different.
My Brother/ why I’m sad about leaving.
My nana and my brother are still in Kingsland Georgia. So how can I leave them? I begged my parents that I could stay till the end of summer, they said no. Let me tell you why I wanted to stay. I was scared, for my brother-
My brother is an ex pill popper and moved in with us about 3 years ago with his dog Paige. I loved that dog like my own. We also left her. He started coming home high. I had lost all respect and well hope in my brother. One day, he had a car accident. He drove my Dad’s car into my (ex) friend’s mailbox. Some how, Nick and I were better friends after the incident. (?)
Well, once he got clean (With a few suicide attempts. Gun to head, didn’t shoot himself. The mailbox thing wasn’t an accident. And so on..) we started hanging out. He’s a 27yearold metal head who plays in Transpose. A local band in the south. We went to gigs together (When my father let me) and he hung out with me. One night we went to get burgers, he said something, and I asked “Why? Why did you do it?” He shook his head, but told me. He said people lost hope, and didn’t think of him as a good person anymore. I told him I lost respect, he just turned and said “I did too Vic.” He was devastated when we moved, it left him home less. But he’s been there before.
When he started packing his things (The same night) I helped. I helped him move his clothes; I kept his favorite moves and Tapes. I especially kept SLC Punk’s. Which taught me EVERYTHING! I know about Punk Mus. See, I listen to a type of ‘pop punk’ not ‘punk’ or ‘emo’. He taught me that. He told me he didn’t care if he died tomorrow, but he was over the attempts to die. “I don’t want a real job, I want my music. I worked so hard on it. It’s all I care about anymore.” He says. I believe him.
But my father, he doesn’t like my brother. I think he’s kind of mad he isn’t his. My mom wasn’t seeing my dad when Tim was born. I think he doesn’t love him. I really don’t. He always says stuff like “He is a coward, or to selfish to kill himself” or “He wants pity” and “Why would he tell a 12 year old this? He’s trying to get you, like he did your mom and nana.” I know somehow this is true. He needs pity, to feel superior though. I defend him, and ask my dad to not talk about him in front of me, he just says I need to know the truth. All I want is to leave the truth for dead. Tim has changed his life. I love him as my full brother, and NOTHING will change that.
So how can a 12 year old deal with this? I block ALL of it out. There’s a LOT more to it. But when I need to think, I usually think of my brother. It helps to think of when he’s love able, and not when he’s on something. Because, that makes me sad. But of course.
Life goes on. And no one can tell me different.
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