Categories > Celebrities > Guns n' Roses > So Fine - (Axl/Duff)
So Fine - (Axl/Duff)
0 reviewsAxl/Duff. Chapter One. Rating may go up in future chapters if necessary.
2Ambiance
I hated myself for being so god damn attracted to him.
I hated the way I would find myself looking at him, and the feeling it gave me, until I realised what I was doing and forced myself to stop.
I hated how the mere thought of him could bring a smile to my face at any given moment.
I hated how happy I was when I was with him, and how when we were apart, how I felt a sense of disappointment and longing.
And most of all I hated the fact, that all this things added up, pretty much all pointed to me being in love with the man.
I hated it all, in fact, I was disgusted in myself for it.
I couldn’t believe I had let this happen, I mean there wasn’t any way I really could have stopped it, it was the last thing I would ever expect to have happened. But now it was too late, I just wanted it to go away.
I didn’t want to be in love with a man, not at all, no. I’m not gay, I’m straight. I love chicks, the way they do their hair, the way they walk, the way their clothes hug their petite little bodies and wrap around their curves in the most beautiful way… just everything about women… I love.
And no, that is not a lie, I am not just telling myself that to try and will myself out of these feelings, it’s true, and it always has been.
Then, why is it, that I am feeling like this?
Being so attracted to this man… Who was the complete opposite of all those things…it just doesn’t make sense, but I can’t stop it, no matter how hard I try.
It started a few months ago, when I began spending more time with him.
I had been living with Slash, but when he moved out with his girlfriend, I was in the apartment alone, Which was nice of course, it was great to have my own space. But It’s nice to have some company sometimes, you know.
Izzy was often busy, either spending time with his girlfriend, or just travelling around, doing whatever the hell it is he does when we aren’t working.
There was always Steven, but… I don’t know, For some reason, I just didn’t really feel as if I connected with him. That’s not to say I didn’t like him, I mean, of course he was my friend and all, we just didn’t connect like I did with Slash and Izzy.
So one night when I was pissed off, and upset, After Izzy having cancelled on me, we were meant to spend some time together, go out for dinner and then go back to my apartment, but he decided staying home with his girl was more important, Slash wouldn’t come out, And even Steven was busy.
So I called Duff, I was expecting a similar answer from him as I got from all the others, but he didn’t, he told me to give him half an hour and he would be at my place.
In the half an hour wait for him, I paced around the apartment, I wasn’t really sure what we were even going to do once he got here, usually when I had hung out with him, we were rehearsing, drinking, playing music, or it was with everyone else as well. I had never really had so much sober, one on one quality time with him. And now that I actually thought about it, I wasn’t even sure that I actually wanted him to come over, or if I had just called him because I was upset that I couldn’t spend time with Izzy or Slash, who I had really wanted to see tonight.
I was still feeling stressed and upset, but i still had about 14 minutes until Duff would arrive, so I had to calm myself down before he got here, But of course, on the twelve minute mark, when I was still a mess. I walked to the door, and stopped for a moment in front of it, before opening it reluctantly.
‘Hey, Duff,’ I said, looking down at the floor, and not directly at him, I didn’t really want him to see I was in a bad mood, I had thought he might be pissed off at me or something, for inviting him over when I was having “One of my moods”, as my friends would say.
‘Hey Axl… You okay? You look a bit…’
‘No, I’m fine,’ I said, trying to smile. I didn’t even know why I was in this mood, I didn’t care about Izzy and Slash anymore, but for some reason the bad mood had stayed anyway.
We just sat around for a while, there wasn’t really anything to do,
But then, we had a few drinks, got talking, I showed him a few things I had come up with on piano, and it ended up being a great night, maybe even better than if Izzy hadn’t cancelled on me.
After that night we began hanging out a lot more often, and i began to feel really close to him,as a friend...well at least that was all I thought it was…
I hated the way I would find myself looking at him, and the feeling it gave me, until I realised what I was doing and forced myself to stop.
I hated how the mere thought of him could bring a smile to my face at any given moment.
I hated how happy I was when I was with him, and how when we were apart, how I felt a sense of disappointment and longing.
And most of all I hated the fact, that all this things added up, pretty much all pointed to me being in love with the man.
I hated it all, in fact, I was disgusted in myself for it.
I couldn’t believe I had let this happen, I mean there wasn’t any way I really could have stopped it, it was the last thing I would ever expect to have happened. But now it was too late, I just wanted it to go away.
I didn’t want to be in love with a man, not at all, no. I’m not gay, I’m straight. I love chicks, the way they do their hair, the way they walk, the way their clothes hug their petite little bodies and wrap around their curves in the most beautiful way… just everything about women… I love.
And no, that is not a lie, I am not just telling myself that to try and will myself out of these feelings, it’s true, and it always has been.
Then, why is it, that I am feeling like this?
Being so attracted to this man… Who was the complete opposite of all those things…it just doesn’t make sense, but I can’t stop it, no matter how hard I try.
It started a few months ago, when I began spending more time with him.
I had been living with Slash, but when he moved out with his girlfriend, I was in the apartment alone, Which was nice of course, it was great to have my own space. But It’s nice to have some company sometimes, you know.
Izzy was often busy, either spending time with his girlfriend, or just travelling around, doing whatever the hell it is he does when we aren’t working.
There was always Steven, but… I don’t know, For some reason, I just didn’t really feel as if I connected with him. That’s not to say I didn’t like him, I mean, of course he was my friend and all, we just didn’t connect like I did with Slash and Izzy.
So one night when I was pissed off, and upset, After Izzy having cancelled on me, we were meant to spend some time together, go out for dinner and then go back to my apartment, but he decided staying home with his girl was more important, Slash wouldn’t come out, And even Steven was busy.
So I called Duff, I was expecting a similar answer from him as I got from all the others, but he didn’t, he told me to give him half an hour and he would be at my place.
In the half an hour wait for him, I paced around the apartment, I wasn’t really sure what we were even going to do once he got here, usually when I had hung out with him, we were rehearsing, drinking, playing music, or it was with everyone else as well. I had never really had so much sober, one on one quality time with him. And now that I actually thought about it, I wasn’t even sure that I actually wanted him to come over, or if I had just called him because I was upset that I couldn’t spend time with Izzy or Slash, who I had really wanted to see tonight.
I was still feeling stressed and upset, but i still had about 14 minutes until Duff would arrive, so I had to calm myself down before he got here, But of course, on the twelve minute mark, when I was still a mess. I walked to the door, and stopped for a moment in front of it, before opening it reluctantly.
‘Hey, Duff,’ I said, looking down at the floor, and not directly at him, I didn’t really want him to see I was in a bad mood, I had thought he might be pissed off at me or something, for inviting him over when I was having “One of my moods”, as my friends would say.
‘Hey Axl… You okay? You look a bit…’
‘No, I’m fine,’ I said, trying to smile. I didn’t even know why I was in this mood, I didn’t care about Izzy and Slash anymore, but for some reason the bad mood had stayed anyway.
We just sat around for a while, there wasn’t really anything to do,
But then, we had a few drinks, got talking, I showed him a few things I had come up with on piano, and it ended up being a great night, maybe even better than if Izzy hadn’t cancelled on me.
After that night we began hanging out a lot more often, and i began to feel really close to him,as a friend...well at least that was all I thought it was…
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