FicWad

So this Chapter is dedicated to Adreajp. I am so sorry I didn't get this done before the 21st. I hope your surgery went okay. I have been so busy, my best friend is leaving for school in two weeks and I'm trying to spend as much time with him as possible, and I've had majoorrrrrr writers block. Forgive me?

'Sure' Was the text that Frank received the next day around two in the afternoon.

He had spent the entire day checking his phone, waiting anxiously for Gerard's response. He hadn't heard anything from his boyfriend since the older man left his house the night before.

When Frank finally read the text, he sighed in relief, immediately responding with, 'Park @ 4?'

After stuffing the phone back into his apron pocket, Frank went back to work. It was hard to keep his mind off of Gerard. He was worried about him. He'd never taken so long to respond to a text before.

Gerard's phone beeped, alerting him of a new message. He was laying flat on his back with his eyes closed and his arm draped over his face. He had the headache from hell and the fucking beeping was not helping him. When the beeping finally stopped, he rolled toward his arm, burying his face in the crook of his elbow. He wanted to fall back to sleep. Maybe if he did his fucking headache would go away.

Debating with the thoughts of sleeping for the rest of the daylight hours or getting up, Gerard finally realized that he needed to get up. Frank wanted to meet with him after his shift. And Frank usually worked until six. That only gave him four hours to get rid of this headache and resurrect into a normal human being. That was not going to be easy.

Dragging his arm away from his face, he rolled toward the end of his bed and let his legs fall to the ground, willing the rest of his body to stand up. When his torso got the clue, he straightened up and got up from the bed, running a hand over his face and through his hair. He then grabbed for his phone on the table next to his bed. He opened the phone and read the message from Frank.

Fuck, Frank wanted to meet him at four. He had less than two hours to make himself presentable. Fuck, fuck, fuck. He texted back a quick, 'k', before he tossed his phone on the mess of sheets and walked quickly up the stairs to the bathroom on the first floor of the house. Once inside the bathroom, he shut and locked the door, making his way to the mirror. He looked at himself. He looked like shit. Just like every other morning he woke up after drinking. At least this time he didn't feel like he was going to throw up his pancreas.

Staring at his reflection he contemplated finding the bottle of pills that he took last night. It could take the edge off his already crappy day. Get rid of his headache and maybe put a smile on his face. Probably not, but he could hope. The ramblings of all the AA and NA meetings ran through his head as he pulled open the cabinet. The twelve fucking steps screamed at him as he picked up the orange bottle and opened the cap. His sponsors words flying through his head as he lifted the pills that were dropped into his hand, into his mouth. Ironically, though, there was nothing running through his mind as he turned on the water, cupped his hand under the flow, and brought the water to his lips so he could swallow the round pills. The only thing he thought of was the satisfaction as he felt the water and pills flush down his throat, already dissolving.

He stood up from the sink and help the orange bottle in his hand. He capped it and rolled in around in his palms. He could just hid it in his clothes and save them for later. No one would know. So that's what he did .Pushing away from the mirror, he stripped himself of his clothes, wrapping the pills in his pajama pants and walked to the shower, turning on the water. After getting the water to the right temperature he stepped into the shower, letting the water wash away every part of yesterday.

Not wanting to take too much time in the shower, Gerard quickly washed himself and stepped out, wrapping a towel around his waist. He dried his hair with a smaller towel as he made his way out of the bathroom, his small pile of clothes in the other hand. On his journey back down to his bedroom to get changed he literally ran into Mikey. The pills hadn't taken affect yet, but his carelessness was more of the excitement that the pills were circulating through his blood stream.

“Fuck, Gerard.” Mikey grumbled, stepping back from his wet brother.

“Sorry,” Gerard said as he pushed past his younger brother. Mikey stopped him though, grabbing Gerard's arm, turning him around to face him.

“Wait,” He said, keeping a firm hold on Gerard's arm.

“What?” Gerard raised an eyebrow looking at Mikey. It was too early, for Gerard anyway, for Mikey to try and push his way into whatever he thought he knew.

“Do you have something to tell me?” He questioned, willing Gerard to come clean on his own.

“No? Should I?”

“Yeah, you should,” Mikey responded, trying to play therapist yet again.

“Mikey, I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. So if you could either tell me what I was supposed to have done wrong, or let me go because I’m going to be late.”

Mikey sighed and loosened his grip on Gerard's arm, “The vodka bottle under my bed, Gerard. Where is it?”

Gerard sighed and looked away from his brother. He didn't think he'd notice. He figured this could just slip under the radar.

“I don't fucking know, Mikey. Can't keep taps on your own fucking alcohol?” Gerard spat, far too angry for the current situation. “Now I have to go.” He stepped away from Mikey, turning on his heel to head back to his bedroom.

“Fine, Gerard, just don't let this fucking thing control you again. I can't watch that a second time.” Mikey quietly. He remembered it all too vividly how hard it was for Gerard to get over his addictions last time.

Gerard didn't respond. He just wanted to get the hell away from Mikey. He didn't want to have to hear the disappointment in his voice or see the sorrow in his eyes. He knew what his addictions did to Mikey. He didn't want to have to see that again. He walked down the basement stairs and into his bedroom, changing quickly into the cleanest clothes he could find.

Once he was dressed, he left from the basement door, walking up the cement steps to his driveway. He climbed into his car and started it, making his way to the park. He knew he was early. It was only about a quarter to three, but he needed to get out of that house before Mikey found out about anything else.

When he reached the park, he found a place to park his car. He then got out of the car,grabbing his sketch pad and pencils,walking toward the picnic table that he and Frank usually sat at. He sat down once he reached the table, and he smiled gingerly when he saw, 'H&S 4ever'. He thought about that couple a lot. He wondered where their life ended up, if they were still together, if they still loved each other. Because it was obvious at one time they did.

Pushing the couple out of his mind, he dropped his sketch pad to the table and began drawing. Drawing, to Gerard, was an escape. And today he needed it. After taking the pills and swallowing the harsh liquid last night, he remembered why he became addicted in the first place. Having those few hours of numbness is one of the best feelings. And right now, Gerard wanted to be numb. He hoped that the pills he took would help with that. He needed that. The pills did eventually numb him, his only focus being on the drawing coming to life on his sketch pad.

They numbed him so much that he didn't even notice Frank sliding onto the bench next to him an hour later, his drawling almost complete.

“Hey, Gee.” Frank smiled and leaned toward Gerard placing a small kiss on Gerard’s cheek. “I'm so happy you came.”

Gerard furrowed his eyebrows turning his head to face Frank, “Why wouldn't I come?”

“Uh, well, last night you took off and then you weren't answering your phone. I thought you were mad.” He laughed airy, embarrassed.

“Nah, not mad. Just needed to clear my head,” He responded. Or fill it with pills and alcohol, Gerard thought.

“Yeah? Everything okay in that head?” Frank laughed again. It was a scared laugh, he was afraid of what was running through Gerard’s mind. If only he knew the truth, huh?

“Yeah, everything's fine.” He gave Frank a half smile and leaned in to brush a kiss on to the corner of Frank's lips. “Your mom give you too much trouble last night?”

Frank let out a sigh of relief and shook his head. “No, thank God. She was just being all boss-y and motherly all in one last night. It's nothing we need to worry about.”

Gerard nodded and placed his hand gently on Frank's thigh, “Good.”

Frank nodded before he leaned in and pressed a kiss directly on Gerard’s lips. He didn't want to talk about his mother anymore, he just wanted to kiss Gerard and finish what he had wanted to start last night.

The two men kissed passionately, shifted positions so they were both straddling the bench and their arms wrapped around the other man's torso. They both had a goal in their mind. For Frank it was to feel Gerard. To feel every inch of him. To get to know him in a way other than just emotionally. And for Gerard it was so he didn't have to feel anymore. Being with Frank took away everything. It was almost as good as any pill or bottle he had ever downed. If he could have Frank this close to him forever, it would make everything okay.

So they kissed, desperate for attention from their partner. They made out in the middle of the day, in the park across from the cafe in which they both worked. They didn't care about the people passing by them. They didn't care that they were getting dirty looks from people as they passed by who didn't like that Frank was tugging relentlessly on Gerard’s hair or pulling at his collar to expose his chest. They just didn't care.

They did care, however, about the erections that were slowly growing in their pants. They were both eager to get rid of these growing problems...together. That's when Gerard broke the kiss and panted against Frank's cheek.

“Let's get out of here.”

Frank just nodded and stood up from the bench, taking Gerard’s hand and dragging him out of the park. When Frank finally found Gerard’s car, which would have been sooner if Gerard was the one leading, they both got in and sped the way back to Frank's house. Neither man had said that they should finish at Frank's house, it was just assumed. There was always someone home at Gerard’s house.

Soon Gerard parked in front of Frank's house and they were both stumbling out of the car making their way to the front door. When Frank entered his house, he took Gerard's hand and pulled him through the house and into the bedroom, immediately. He was already too turned on from the hot and heavy make out session that had taken place at the park to wait much longer. Once he and Gerard were inside his bedroom he shut and locked the door for good measure. His mom wouldn't be home for hours, but after the last night he was a bit cautious.

When he turned around from locking the door, Gerard was staring at him. His lips were red and swollen from the attention they had received, his hair tousled from the amount of tugging and pulling Frank had inflicted, and the collar of his shirt was slightly stretched from when Frank had tugged, trying to get closer to Gerard. And he looked amazing. Frank was never more attracted to anyone person than he was right now. Smirking slightly, Frank walked the few steps to where Gerard was and tangled his fingers the in the collar of Gerard's shirt again. He pulled the older man closer to him, so their stomachs were touching, and he attached his lips forcefully to Gerard's.

Gerard immediately reciprocated the kiss, pushing his tongue against Frank's anxious one. He wrapped his arms around the younger mans smaller frame and held him close as their mouths moved swiftly against the others. Frank, who was moaning with want into his boyfriend's mouth, moved his hands from the collar of Gerard's shirt to the waistband of Gerard's jeans.

Gerard, who was pleasantly surprised by Frank's forward motions, let his own hands slide slowly down Frank's back and to the curve of the smaller man's ass. He squeezed it gently, causing Frank to gasp and push his hips against Gerard's. Now it was Gerard's turn to gasp when he felt Frank's hardening member brush against his own. It had been so long since he's felt this.

Wanting to move things further along, Frank walked Gerard back to his bed and pushed him backwards gently. When Gerard was laying on the bed, he climbed on the bed and laid next to Gerard, attaching his lips to the older man's once again. As they kissed, both of their hands roamed the others body. Frank's hands were mostly below the belt, thought, while Gerard's explored every inch of Frank. When Frank felt Gerard's, now extremely noticeable, hard member, he moaned into the kiss and rubbed it slowly through Gerard's jeans. Gerard groaned and pressed his hips against Frank's hand. He lifted his leg, wrapping it around Frank's and pressing their hips together causing Frank's hand to be trapped in the middle of the two.

Letting out a breathy moan against Gerard's lips, Frank slipped his hand up to the zipper of Gerard's jeans, undoing it with shaky, anxious hands as his hips moved against Gerard's. Once the pants were open, he pushed his hands inside, taking a hold of Gerard's hard, leaking member. Gerard gasped and broke the kiss, dropping his head to the bed and pressing his hips toward Frank's hand. When Gerard broke the kiss, Frank smirked and attached his lips to Gerard's exposed neck. He nipped and sucked and licked the skin available to him as he stroked Gerard, rolling his thumb over the sensitive head.

It didn't take Gerard long before he was yelling Frank's name and alerting him that he was ready to come. Frank kept his hand going at a steady tempo, encouraging Gerard to release.

“Come on, Gee,” He panted. He had extracted his mouth from Gerard's neck so he could watch Gerard. “Come for me, Gee,” Frank whispered. His hips were moving in time with his hand as he waiting for his boyfriend's release.

“Fuck, Frankie,” Gerard moaned loudly and bucked his hips against Frank's hand as he started coming. He pressed his hips into Frank's hand as he rode through the rest of his orgasm, moaning incoherently the whole time. Frank just watched Gerard, placing light kissed to his boyfriend's jaw as he slipped his hand out of Gerard's pants. He wiped his hand off on the bedsheets slightly, before slipping the same hand into his own pants finding his aching member.

When Gerard was back from his orgasm high, he realized what Frank was doing and he tugged on Frank's arm, whispering, “It's my turn, baby.”

Frank just nodded dumbly and slipped his hand out of his pants. Gerard replaced Frank's hand with his own, quickly and began stroking Frank as his lips found the smaller man's. Frank gasped against Gerard's lips, not quite able to close his lips around Gerard in a kiss.

“Gee. Not long. Oh fuck,” Frank moaned pressing his hips against Gerard's hand.

“Yeah, that's it, Frankie.” Gerard moved his lips from Frank's frozen ones to his neck, moving his mouth against the skin. When he felt Frank buck his hips into his hand erratically, he grinned against the the stretched skin of Frank's neck. “Come on, baby,” He whispered huskily, his hot breath falling against Frank's neck.

Frank arched his back, pressing his hips hard against Gerard's hand as he released himself. He moaned loudly as his hips uncontrollably bucked into Gerard’s hand. After a few more minutes he was able to regain his composure and look at Gerard.

“It's so much better with your hand,” Frank mumbled, letting his cheek rest against Gerard’s clothed chest.

Gerard laughed, wiping his hand on the sheets before wrapping it around Frank. He held the smaller man close and kissed the top of his head, “Same for me, Frankie.” Frank hummed in response and pressed closer to Gerard, not needing any other words to describe how fucking amazing that was.


For the rest of the evening, Frank and Gerard were curled up in Franks bed. They ended up turning on a movie, which caused them both to fall into a light sleep. The sleep didn't last long, though, because soon they were both woken up by Gerard’s phone ringing. Gerard groaned and flung his hand around the bed in a sad attempt to find his phone. When the ringing finally stopped, Gerard still hadn't found his phone. Sighing to himself, he got out of the bed, after untangling himself from the limbs that were attached to Frank, and searched the room until he found his jeans. He pulled out his phone and saw who the call was from. 'Mikey.' Sighing once more, he decided that he should go home. Mikey would just keep calling until he came home anyway.

Without a word, he slipped on his clothes and slipped his phone back into his pants. He walked back over to the bed, where Frank had fallen back to sleep, and he sat down gently.

“Frankie,” He whispered, shaking Frank lightly. “Frank, wake up.”

Frank grunted and shifted toward Gerard, blinking his eyes open, “Hm?”

“I have to go. That was Mikey. I'll see you tomorrow?”

“Mmhm. Bye, Gee,” Frank mumbled as he let his eyes slip shut again.

“Bye,” Gerard whispered as he pressed a light kiss to Frank's head before making his way out of the bedroom and then the house.

On his walk to his car from Frank's house, Gerard’s mind was no longer filled with happy thoughts of Frank, but of lonely images of the solitude in his bedroom. He needed some more of those pills. They made him feel okay. They made him not notice the silence floating around his life. He needed those fucking pills.

As he slid into his car, he began to think of the shrinking amount of alcohol and pills he had in his house. He could easily walk into a liquor store and buy some more. But pills were a different story. He remembered that when he was low, he could always call Chris, his ex-drug dealer, and he'd hook him up. Chris always had an array of colored 'candies' ready for the sell. Fishing his phone out of his pocket, he scrolled through his contacts, praying that he didn't delete Chris's number. He didn't, strangely enough.

He hit send and started his car as the phone rang. He waited the few seconds until he heard the hoarse, deep voice of his old friend.

“Hello?”

“Hey, Chris? It's Gerard.” He paused waiting for confirmation that this man knew who he was. When nothing was said, he pressed further, “Gerard Way.”

“Oh, yeah, man. What's up?”

“Nothing, hey, do you still got those...candies?” Gerard’s tongue felt heavy. It had been so long since he said those words to Chris. It was too familiar for him.

“Uh, yeah. I do.” There was a hesitation in Chris's voice. He didn't want to be selling to his old friend. His clean, old friend. “When do you need it?”

“Uh, tonight? Now?” Gerard bit his lip.

“Yeah. Give me twenty minutes. Okay?”

“Yup, same spot?” Gerard asked, putting his car in drive.

“Mhm, same spot.”

Gerard hung up and pulled away from Frank's curb. He drove quickly, making his way onto the main road. He needed to stop by the bank before he met Chris. He needed to take money out of his account. Money that he really didn't have to spend. Money that was supposed to be saved and used for an apartment. Not on pill that were inevitably going to ruin his life.