FicWad

“You mean like, fallen-angel Lucifer? The one who ended up as Satan?”
“The very one. That guy? He’s an immortal, evil being, who has been alive since before the world was created. He’s the devil. Literally.”
“Wow….” The term “the devil made me do it,” never quite made as much sense as it did just then. I shivered.
“Yeah. Now get in the car.”
I obeyed. He slid in next to me and started the engine.
“How do you know all this?”
“That’s not an easy answer,” he said, backing out of the parking lot.
“Please. You just told me the devil himself singled me out of the six billion people on this planet and yet you think it’s not an easy answer? How did you know that, Gerard?”
He sighed. “I told you I made mistakes after Selena died. Can’t we just leave it at that?”
“Um no. No we can’t. Now starting talking.”
He sighed as he turned onto a crowded intersection. “I thought I loved her more than anything. After she died, I thought I had nothing left to live for. I had to see her again. I contemplated suicide many times. I swore I’d see her again, if it was the last thing I ever did.
“He came to me in a dream. He told me he could let me see her again. And more. He told me all I had to do was sign the paper, and all my dreams would come true…” his words choked off then. He closed his eyes as the traffic crawled along, clearly fighting back tears. “I was grief-stricken and careless. I knew this was my one chance to achieve my goal. So I signed it without hesitation or care. I told him I’d do whatever he wanted, as long as he wanted, as long as he held his end of the deal. I had to see Selena. That’s all I thought about.
“Then he told me what I had to do. I had to be the personification of death. Just like Thanatos,” he murmured, choking out a humorless laugh. “I would have to create natural disasters, plague innocent people with disease, destroy lives and pull apart families. I had to do this for twenty years, and then I could be with my precious Selena once again.
“It was horrible. I hated it. I saw the face of every single person who died because of me. I felt their pulse go still, their bodies go cold and numb. They were damned, all of them, to eternity of misery in hell. I kept thinking of Selena, knowing it would end once I saw her again, that this was easy compared to what I could have had to do. I thought of her smiling face, her lips on mine, the warmth of her hand entwined with mine.” He shook his head.
“I got to see her after twenty years, of course. He told me I had one day with her and to make it last. I planned to. I was so happy, so ready for her to be in my arms again. And at first, it was just like the old days. We were so perfectly happy together, so in love. But I soon realized this wasn’t how she was before. She was cold, distant, and above all…sad. She wasn’t Selena. She was nothing but a hollow mockery of the girl I used to know. When that day was over, I was almost…relieved. Relieved to not have to look at her anymore. And I was definitely happy to be free of the burden that is death.
“But I had trusted the very face of dishonesty. He told me I wasn’t free, that I couldn’t be free, because he couldn’t find anyone else to take my job. That I was stuck like this. That it wasn’t his problem. That I’d sold my soul. It was too late now.” A lone tear ran down his face. “Because of my reckless decisions, I have to murder innocent people. And the worst part is, I’m immortal. I can’t succumb to that which I create. I’m stuck like this. Forever.”
We were in front of my house by now. I stared at him, transfixed by the pain on his face. He was like a wounded animal--lost, alone, afraid. I reached out and took his hand, making him turn to me. The look on his face was begging me to tell him I didn’t care, that I would stay next to him, ease his pain. My fingers laced through his.
“I…I don’t know what to say,” I whispered.
“Tell me that it doesn’t matter to you. Tell me you won’t run away from me like everyone else. Tell me that I won’t regret telling you. Tell me that the connection I feel to you is because I can trust you, not because I shouldn’t. Tell me…tell me that this doesn’t affect whatever we had when we kissed.”
I slowly leaned forward and gently pressed my lips to his. I leaned away just as slowly. “Good night, Gerard.”
“Samantha,” he murmured as I turned to go.
I stopped and glanced back at him.
“Promise me this won’t ruin it. I’ve needed someone to break this cycle for a long time. It’s always been the same. I wake up, I live, emotionless and numb like the people I’ve killed, and then I sleep at night, but only halfway. I have to stay awake to kill people around the world. And I can’t stand it. So save me. I need you.”
In that moment, it clicked into place for me. He wasn’t an evil entity, like, say, Thanatos or Satan. He wasn’t the cold, merciless face of death depicted in movies, books and pictures. He was sad, regretful, and numb with the pain. I climbed into the driver’s seat next to him and wrapped my arms around him.
“It doesn’t matter to me. I won’t run away like everyone else. You won’t regret telling me. You can trust me. This doesn’t affect anything. I promise this won’t ruin it.” I leaned in and kissed him then, a real kiss, not a quick brushing of the lips.
I’d only known this guy a little over a week. But for whatever reason, I knew our meeting was the best thing that had ever happened to me.