FicWad

Friday night came quickly and I was inside, avoiding the crowded outside world. I had no idea why people chose friday night as party night. I understood for kids in school that it was popular because it signified the end of the school week and sleeping in became a possibility but if you have a job then why not just party another less crowded night? Most employers would be ecstatic to have their employees want to work friday nights. Then again I guess the idea of partying is to be around people and have fun. I was just viewing the entire thing from my anti-social perspective.

My phone vibrated and I set my book down to grab it. I was already in bed in my pajamas, enjoying my night alone. My parents had gone out and wouldn't be home until around 2 in the morning. I'd probably be asleep by then so I was hoping for a good non-violent, non-dramatic night. It was just me and my book.

"Hello?" I answered my phone without looking at the caller ID.

"Hey, glad you answered." It was Brendon.

I smiled at the sound of his voice. "Whats up?"

"Just tuning my guitar." Brendon replied and I could hear the guitar in the background.

I listened quietly as he started playing his guitar. Over the phone it was a little hard but I could still hear it. Brendon had only played for me one other time but it had been beautiful. He definitely had musical talent.

"I want to play something for you." Brendon said softly, startling me. I had been listening intently to the guitar so his voice kind of surprised me and knocked me out of my thoughts. Play for me? I was excited. I loved listening to him.

"I'm listening." I replied, shutting off my bedroom light. Once I was done I went and crawled in to my bed, getting comfortable.

I could hear Brendon shifting and then he asked, "Can you hear me?"

"Yeah." I told him.

Then the music started. He was playing his guitar but what really surprised me was when he started singing. God, his voice was so beautiful. He had never sung for me before. I was familiar with the song. Maroon 5- She will be loved.

I closed my eyes and listened to him sing for me. It probably qualified as the best night ever, the most magical.

I know where you hide, alone in your car, know all of the things that make you who you are. I know that goodbye means nothing at all. Comes back and begs me to catch her every time she falls. Tap on my window, knock on my door. I want to make you feel beautiful.

Brendon finished the song and then I heard him moving things again and then his voice came through, "Well, I know the song doesn't really apply to us completely but I do want you to know that you're beautiful and that... well, I really-"

I tried to cut him off before he got to what I knew he was attempting to get at, "You sound really familiar." I said, thinking about it. It was true. His voice was familiar. Where had I heard it before?

"Yeah?" Brendon asked, sounding amused. "Who do I sound like?" He asked.

"I, uh..." I tried to think about it but found my mind a blank. "I don't know. I'm sorry. I'm probably just crazy and imagining things." I assured him. It wouldn't be the first time.

"Well... like I was saying Hayley, I think I really l-" He tried again.

I cut Brendon off again, knowing what he was about to say. "Don't Brendon. Just pace yourself. I'm not sure that I can do this."

"What are you saying Hayley?" Brendon asked, sounding crushed.

"I don't think I can do this anymore. This! Whatever this is. I don't know what I was thinking but it just can't go on. I'm sorry Brendon." I said, feeling my eyes fill with tears. This had to happen. He made me feel whole but he was just words over the phone. If we met... Then he would be real. Things just wouldn't be able to stay the same. If he saw me what would he think? Would he see me as worthless? I just couldn't take that chance. Not with someone that meant so much.

"Is this because I want to meet you? We don't have to meet if you don't want to." Brendon said, sounding upset.

I hated hurting him. "No Brendon, it's just time for this to end." I said softly, not knowing what else to say to him to make this easier for us both.

"Please don't do this Hayley." Brendon begged. "I'm sorry if I crossed the line by asking to meet you. I take it back. I take whatever I did to upset you back but please stay."

The line went silent. I didn't know what to say. Hearing him plead made me feel like a monster. I didn't want to hurt him. He was everything to me. I couldn't let him see me. He would realize how worthless I was, how unworthy of his friendship I was.

"I need you Hayley." Brendon whispered.

"You don't." I said, clearing my throat. Everything felt like it was crawling by. My words had to be forced out. Tears started soaking my cheeks. It was hard to speak but I had to. "You don't need me. You're an amazing person Brendon. I'm so grateful for the time with you that I had." I couldn't say goodbye. I couldn't listen to his goodbye. I hung up. The silence in my room became unbearable but was soon broken by my sobs.

Had I really just shoved the only good thing I had out of my life?



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(Sorry, I meant to get this out awhile ago... It's also really short. I'll try to update again soon! I appreciate any R&R's, thanks for reading!)