Categories > Celebrities > My Chemical Romance > Fly Away, Dance on the Milky Way
Chapter 53: Spread your wings and…
It had been a long time since Gerard drank. Sure, he’d had a few drinks here and there, but he hadn’t really gotten wasted. But during those few months that he hadn’t drank, it’s like his body had forgotten about the alcohol, and didn’t handle it as well anymore.
Gerard couldn’t do much more than sit in the kitchen, breathe in the smell of the coffee, and hold his head.
“Do you feel any better?” Lindsey asked.
“I feel like there are millions of tiny miners in my head, chopping their way to my brain…”
“Here, take this”, she said and placed a small, white pill on the table. “I’ll give you water.”
Gerard just stared at the pill for a moment. Another thing he hadn’t taken in a while. He was wary of even simple pain killers now. But despite that, and because the pain was too big, he took it, and chucked down the glass of water that Lindsey gave him.
“I think there’s something you should know,” she said after Gerard groaned and started rubbing his forehead to relieve the pain.
“What?” Gerard asked.
“I’m not sure if it means anything but, last night, after midnight, I was awake and here in the kitchen… And Gia was in the backyard. I just thought it was a little strange.”
Gerard thought about. It was weird that she had been outside, and immediately he thought that she must’ve been there because of Lucas. But he had left hours before that, it couldn’t have been. There was no change in Gerard’s expression until he heard a noise coming from outside. He got up, went to the window, and saw Lucas’ dad and Tina outside of their house, going into their car to go somewhere. Then, Lucas came out, running to the car. Gerard groaned.
“This is just great. One way or another, he will always be there, just to piss me off. He does it on purpose!”
“Gerard, calm down”, Lindsey said. “Go back to bed and relax, okay?”
After a while of fuming of anger, Gerard sighed, giving up. “Fine,” he said, and left to go to his room. After he’d gone, Lindsey picked up her cell phone and called Mikey.
When he woke up hours later, Lindsey was sitting next to him, reading a book.
“Good morning sunshine”, she smiled.
“What time is it?”
“Almost 3 pm.”
Gerard groaned, pulling a pillow over his head in order to block out the light. He’d never been this tired in his life.
“Listen, I did something you may not really approve of right now, but you will appreciate it later,” she confessed, looking unsure of how he will react.
“What’s that?”
“I called Mikey. He said he would take Gia for a couple of days, so you’d have some time for yourself. You know, to think.”
Gerard didn’t give her a reply. Instead, he fell deep into his thoughts, wondering why he had to re-live the nightmares that happened a year ago.
Back then, Gia was taken away from him by Mikey, so Gerard would have time to ‘consider his actions’. It was a punishment in the cruelest form. But as a result from that terrible time-out, Gerard had decided to get clean from the drugs and alcohol that had been ruling his life until then.
But what was he supposed to do now? It was apparent that something had to be done, because after all, losing his daughter was the worst thing that could happen.
_______________________
Gia let out an audible sigh when she dropped her bag on the bed and then sat down. She’d never thought she’d return to this room, especially in these circumstances. Not that she didn’t enjoy Mikey and Alicia’s company, but she despised the thought of being away from home.
“I’m sorry it’s not very clean, Alicia’s nephew stayed here a couple of weeks ago and we didn’t have time to properly tidy it up”, Mikey apologized.
“That’s fine”, Gia said. At least now she’d have something to do. Cleaning up was probably her favorite past time, she loved the feeling she got after it. And besides, it was much more hygienic to take care of your house by cleaning rather than to let dust collect in the corners.
“Do you need anything?” Mikey asked.
The girl looked around the room before answering. She needed to be home. But since she had a feeling that going home wasn’t an option, she assured her uncle that she didn’t need anything.
“Are you sure? Do you want to talk?”
“I think I’d rather just be alone.”
Mikey nodded. “Right. Well, if you decide you want to talk after all, I’ll be… around.”
After that, he left, leaving Gia alone to the room. It was strange, what she was feeling. On the other hand, she wanted everyone to just leave her alone, but still… she had never been lonelier.
____________________
For two days Gerard was alone with his thoughts. Lindsey stayed away from him, not from his request, but because she had a feeling that he’d prefer to be alone.
What he realized was how much he despised time.
That’s right, endless hours of pondering, and it all came down to time. He’d never realized it before, but time was slipping through his fingers. Gerard may look and act young, but the reality was that he was just a man, helpless when it came to time. But what made his realization more of a shock for him, was that Gia was fifteen, god forbid.
Fifteen.
Where did all those years go? He’d spent the majority of them drinking, not paying attention. And so he didn’t notice how she’d grown up from the small girl who he had to take care of by himself to a teenage girl. And in just few short years she’ll be a woman.
The thought was disturbing and strange, but it was a wake-up call. What exactly had he been thinking, letting her go away for half the summer? He should’ve taken her with him, take advantage of the time they still had.
Gerard sat on his bed, staring out of the window. He had just taken a shower, but it hadn’t made him feel any better. He felt the water drip from his hair on to his shirt, through the fabric, and it felt cold against his skin. But he didn’t even notice. It fit the theme of the day.
It was morning. Well, to him it was. Glancing at the clock, he realized how long he’d been sitting there. It was nearly 12 pm, and he had sat down at 10 am.
These few days that Gia had been gone gave him a lot time to think. He was nearly grateful for that, but he also missed his daughter terribly.
He realized he had to let Gia live her life, but he couldn’t help being so protective. He only wanted to protect her, that’s all. But where goes the line between protective and possessive?
________________
Gia was bored out of her mind, and the smell of gasoline made her slightly dizzy, but not enough to make her leave. If she left, she’d be even more bored.
Mikey’s head and upper body were hidden under the hood of the car, and every now and then he’d put out his hand and ask for a tool, which of course Gia couldn’t give him because she knew nothing about cars and tools. So, they’d argue for a while, Gia would give him the wrong tools, but eventually it would be the right one, and his head would disappear under the hood again.
“This is so boring,” she sighed, sitting on the chair. She’d much rather be back home than there in the garage, watching Mikey try to make the old car work again.
“Did you say something?” Mikey asked, looking at her.
When she saw his face, Gia couldn’t help but laugh. “You’ve got a little something on your face.”
Mikey, who had black grease splatters all over his face and upper body, frowned when she mentioned it. “Where?” he asked.
“Right… Like… All over,” she laughed.
After a moment of thinking about it, he decided he didn’t care about the grease. He was shirtless anyway, and it’s not like the grease would show on his black pants. It didn’t matter. He disappeared under the hood again and didn’t reappear until there was a knock at the open door that connected the garage and the living parts of the house.
Mikey appeared once again and he and Gia looked to the door.
“Hey Gerard,” Mikey said to his brother, happy but understandably surprised to see him. “What gives?”
Gia wasn’t sure whether to be happy to see him or not, so she ended up glancing at him a few times and then ignored him completely.
“I just thought I’d come say hi. And I wanted to talk to Gia,” Gerard explained, stepping into the garage.
“Okay. I’ll give you two some privacy,” Mikey said and picked up his shirt from the car’s roof, starting to leave, but Gerard stopped him.
“That’s okay, we’ll go outside.”
Gia followed him after glancing at Mikey as if to ask him if she should. When he just shrugged, she left the garage.
Gerard and Gia sat on the porch steps, and from habit, he immediately took out the pack of cigarettes and the lighter from his jacket pocket. Gia had never said anything to him about the smoking, because in her opinion, giving up the alcohol and drugs were enough trouble to give up. And she had gotten used to the smell, so it didn’t bother her as much anymore.
“So, you like being here with Mikey?” Gerard started after he’d lit the cancer stick.
“Is that a trick question?” she asked quietly, still avoiding his eyes.
“What?”
“Well, if I answered no, then you’d assume that I hated Mikey, but if I said yes, then you’d assume I hated you. There’s no winning in this.”
“Do you want to come home?” Gerard asked suddenly.
She didn’t answer for a while. Then she said: “It depends.”
“On what?”
“Whether you’re still mad.”
“No, I’m not mad. I’m sorry about going off like that. I shouldn’t have. But from now on, I’m going to be calm. I won’t freak out, I won’t yell. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Gia said, rolling her eyes. “You know just as well as I do, that if Lucas announced that he’s moving back to our neighborhood, you’d strangle him to death.”
Gerard had to admit, she had a point. But now that Lucas was out of the picture, it’d be a lot easier not to tear anyone to pieces.
“I can make one promise though,” he said. “I promise that from now on, I’ll at least try to listen to your side of the story before yelling.”
“Thank you,” she smiled. “And for the record, me and Lucas never had sex.”
“I want to believe you. And let’s make one thing straight. I never want to hear the word ‘sex’ from you ever again.”
Gia rolled her eyes. “Oh fine, I can promise you that much. And you really don’t need to worry about… well, you know, that happening. I’m not stupid.”
“Oh really?” Gerard asked, raising an eyebrow. “Then tell me, what is the proper age for a young woman to become sexually active?”
“Fourty.”
Upon hearing this answer, his smile got even wider and he pulled her to a tight hug. “That’s my girl. I’m taking your word on that. So, we’re good?”
“Yeah, we’re good. But just so you know, I’ll never be comfortable talking about these things with you.”
“Neither will I.”
Gerard butted out the cigarette and they returned to the garage. The smell of gasoline hit Gia like a wave after being in the fresh air, but she’d get used to it soon.
“Mikey, I’m going back home,” Gia announced once Mikey realized they were there. He’d moved on to work on something under the car and rolled into sight when he noticed them.
“Really? Well that’s good. Not that I don’t like having you here, but… You know,” Mikey said, and then sat up.
“Is this what I think it is?” Gerard asked in awe, walking around the old, dusty car.
“Yep. Gia, this is me and Gerard’s first car. Well, at first it was just Gerard’s, but later we shared it when I got my license.”
“But where’d it come from?” Gerard asked. “I thought dad sold it.”
“He did, but it turns out that the buyer was going to demolish it, so dad bought it back and called me to ask if I we’d still want it. I thought it could be fun to work on it. Wanna help?”
“You even ask! Gia, check this out,” Gerard grinned, and opened the back door so Gia could see the backseat. “That’s where you were conceived.”
Gia gasped, backed away from the car and shrieked. “Oh my god! That’s disgusting!”
“You’re welcome,” he laughed before starting to ask Mikey questions about something car-related.
Gia was now bored AND disgusted, so she announced that she’d go find Alicia, but neither of them heard her. Too occupied by the car. And it didn’t seem like they’d be going home any time soon, so might as well do something useful with her time.
It had been a long time since Gerard drank. Sure, he’d had a few drinks here and there, but he hadn’t really gotten wasted. But during those few months that he hadn’t drank, it’s like his body had forgotten about the alcohol, and didn’t handle it as well anymore.
Gerard couldn’t do much more than sit in the kitchen, breathe in the smell of the coffee, and hold his head.
“Do you feel any better?” Lindsey asked.
“I feel like there are millions of tiny miners in my head, chopping their way to my brain…”
“Here, take this”, she said and placed a small, white pill on the table. “I’ll give you water.”
Gerard just stared at the pill for a moment. Another thing he hadn’t taken in a while. He was wary of even simple pain killers now. But despite that, and because the pain was too big, he took it, and chucked down the glass of water that Lindsey gave him.
“I think there’s something you should know,” she said after Gerard groaned and started rubbing his forehead to relieve the pain.
“What?” Gerard asked.
“I’m not sure if it means anything but, last night, after midnight, I was awake and here in the kitchen… And Gia was in the backyard. I just thought it was a little strange.”
Gerard thought about. It was weird that she had been outside, and immediately he thought that she must’ve been there because of Lucas. But he had left hours before that, it couldn’t have been. There was no change in Gerard’s expression until he heard a noise coming from outside. He got up, went to the window, and saw Lucas’ dad and Tina outside of their house, going into their car to go somewhere. Then, Lucas came out, running to the car. Gerard groaned.
“This is just great. One way or another, he will always be there, just to piss me off. He does it on purpose!”
“Gerard, calm down”, Lindsey said. “Go back to bed and relax, okay?”
After a while of fuming of anger, Gerard sighed, giving up. “Fine,” he said, and left to go to his room. After he’d gone, Lindsey picked up her cell phone and called Mikey.
When he woke up hours later, Lindsey was sitting next to him, reading a book.
“Good morning sunshine”, she smiled.
“What time is it?”
“Almost 3 pm.”
Gerard groaned, pulling a pillow over his head in order to block out the light. He’d never been this tired in his life.
“Listen, I did something you may not really approve of right now, but you will appreciate it later,” she confessed, looking unsure of how he will react.
“What’s that?”
“I called Mikey. He said he would take Gia for a couple of days, so you’d have some time for yourself. You know, to think.”
Gerard didn’t give her a reply. Instead, he fell deep into his thoughts, wondering why he had to re-live the nightmares that happened a year ago.
Back then, Gia was taken away from him by Mikey, so Gerard would have time to ‘consider his actions’. It was a punishment in the cruelest form. But as a result from that terrible time-out, Gerard had decided to get clean from the drugs and alcohol that had been ruling his life until then.
But what was he supposed to do now? It was apparent that something had to be done, because after all, losing his daughter was the worst thing that could happen.
_______________________
Gia let out an audible sigh when she dropped her bag on the bed and then sat down. She’d never thought she’d return to this room, especially in these circumstances. Not that she didn’t enjoy Mikey and Alicia’s company, but she despised the thought of being away from home.
“I’m sorry it’s not very clean, Alicia’s nephew stayed here a couple of weeks ago and we didn’t have time to properly tidy it up”, Mikey apologized.
“That’s fine”, Gia said. At least now she’d have something to do. Cleaning up was probably her favorite past time, she loved the feeling she got after it. And besides, it was much more hygienic to take care of your house by cleaning rather than to let dust collect in the corners.
“Do you need anything?” Mikey asked.
The girl looked around the room before answering. She needed to be home. But since she had a feeling that going home wasn’t an option, she assured her uncle that she didn’t need anything.
“Are you sure? Do you want to talk?”
“I think I’d rather just be alone.”
Mikey nodded. “Right. Well, if you decide you want to talk after all, I’ll be… around.”
After that, he left, leaving Gia alone to the room. It was strange, what she was feeling. On the other hand, she wanted everyone to just leave her alone, but still… she had never been lonelier.
____________________
For two days Gerard was alone with his thoughts. Lindsey stayed away from him, not from his request, but because she had a feeling that he’d prefer to be alone.
What he realized was how much he despised time.
That’s right, endless hours of pondering, and it all came down to time. He’d never realized it before, but time was slipping through his fingers. Gerard may look and act young, but the reality was that he was just a man, helpless when it came to time. But what made his realization more of a shock for him, was that Gia was fifteen, god forbid.
Fifteen.
Where did all those years go? He’d spent the majority of them drinking, not paying attention. And so he didn’t notice how she’d grown up from the small girl who he had to take care of by himself to a teenage girl. And in just few short years she’ll be a woman.
The thought was disturbing and strange, but it was a wake-up call. What exactly had he been thinking, letting her go away for half the summer? He should’ve taken her with him, take advantage of the time they still had.
Gerard sat on his bed, staring out of the window. He had just taken a shower, but it hadn’t made him feel any better. He felt the water drip from his hair on to his shirt, through the fabric, and it felt cold against his skin. But he didn’t even notice. It fit the theme of the day.
It was morning. Well, to him it was. Glancing at the clock, he realized how long he’d been sitting there. It was nearly 12 pm, and he had sat down at 10 am.
These few days that Gia had been gone gave him a lot time to think. He was nearly grateful for that, but he also missed his daughter terribly.
He realized he had to let Gia live her life, but he couldn’t help being so protective. He only wanted to protect her, that’s all. But where goes the line between protective and possessive?
________________
Gia was bored out of her mind, and the smell of gasoline made her slightly dizzy, but not enough to make her leave. If she left, she’d be even more bored.
Mikey’s head and upper body were hidden under the hood of the car, and every now and then he’d put out his hand and ask for a tool, which of course Gia couldn’t give him because she knew nothing about cars and tools. So, they’d argue for a while, Gia would give him the wrong tools, but eventually it would be the right one, and his head would disappear under the hood again.
“This is so boring,” she sighed, sitting on the chair. She’d much rather be back home than there in the garage, watching Mikey try to make the old car work again.
“Did you say something?” Mikey asked, looking at her.
When she saw his face, Gia couldn’t help but laugh. “You’ve got a little something on your face.”
Mikey, who had black grease splatters all over his face and upper body, frowned when she mentioned it. “Where?” he asked.
“Right… Like… All over,” she laughed.
After a moment of thinking about it, he decided he didn’t care about the grease. He was shirtless anyway, and it’s not like the grease would show on his black pants. It didn’t matter. He disappeared under the hood again and didn’t reappear until there was a knock at the open door that connected the garage and the living parts of the house.
Mikey appeared once again and he and Gia looked to the door.
“Hey Gerard,” Mikey said to his brother, happy but understandably surprised to see him. “What gives?”
Gia wasn’t sure whether to be happy to see him or not, so she ended up glancing at him a few times and then ignored him completely.
“I just thought I’d come say hi. And I wanted to talk to Gia,” Gerard explained, stepping into the garage.
“Okay. I’ll give you two some privacy,” Mikey said and picked up his shirt from the car’s roof, starting to leave, but Gerard stopped him.
“That’s okay, we’ll go outside.”
Gia followed him after glancing at Mikey as if to ask him if she should. When he just shrugged, she left the garage.
Gerard and Gia sat on the porch steps, and from habit, he immediately took out the pack of cigarettes and the lighter from his jacket pocket. Gia had never said anything to him about the smoking, because in her opinion, giving up the alcohol and drugs were enough trouble to give up. And she had gotten used to the smell, so it didn’t bother her as much anymore.
“So, you like being here with Mikey?” Gerard started after he’d lit the cancer stick.
“Is that a trick question?” she asked quietly, still avoiding his eyes.
“What?”
“Well, if I answered no, then you’d assume that I hated Mikey, but if I said yes, then you’d assume I hated you. There’s no winning in this.”
“Do you want to come home?” Gerard asked suddenly.
She didn’t answer for a while. Then she said: “It depends.”
“On what?”
“Whether you’re still mad.”
“No, I’m not mad. I’m sorry about going off like that. I shouldn’t have. But from now on, I’m going to be calm. I won’t freak out, I won’t yell. I promise.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep,” Gia said, rolling her eyes. “You know just as well as I do, that if Lucas announced that he’s moving back to our neighborhood, you’d strangle him to death.”
Gerard had to admit, she had a point. But now that Lucas was out of the picture, it’d be a lot easier not to tear anyone to pieces.
“I can make one promise though,” he said. “I promise that from now on, I’ll at least try to listen to your side of the story before yelling.”
“Thank you,” she smiled. “And for the record, me and Lucas never had sex.”
“I want to believe you. And let’s make one thing straight. I never want to hear the word ‘sex’ from you ever again.”
Gia rolled her eyes. “Oh fine, I can promise you that much. And you really don’t need to worry about… well, you know, that happening. I’m not stupid.”
“Oh really?” Gerard asked, raising an eyebrow. “Then tell me, what is the proper age for a young woman to become sexually active?”
“Fourty.”
Upon hearing this answer, his smile got even wider and he pulled her to a tight hug. “That’s my girl. I’m taking your word on that. So, we’re good?”
“Yeah, we’re good. But just so you know, I’ll never be comfortable talking about these things with you.”
“Neither will I.”
Gerard butted out the cigarette and they returned to the garage. The smell of gasoline hit Gia like a wave after being in the fresh air, but she’d get used to it soon.
“Mikey, I’m going back home,” Gia announced once Mikey realized they were there. He’d moved on to work on something under the car and rolled into sight when he noticed them.
“Really? Well that’s good. Not that I don’t like having you here, but… You know,” Mikey said, and then sat up.
“Is this what I think it is?” Gerard asked in awe, walking around the old, dusty car.
“Yep. Gia, this is me and Gerard’s first car. Well, at first it was just Gerard’s, but later we shared it when I got my license.”
“But where’d it come from?” Gerard asked. “I thought dad sold it.”
“He did, but it turns out that the buyer was going to demolish it, so dad bought it back and called me to ask if I we’d still want it. I thought it could be fun to work on it. Wanna help?”
“You even ask! Gia, check this out,” Gerard grinned, and opened the back door so Gia could see the backseat. “That’s where you were conceived.”
Gia gasped, backed away from the car and shrieked. “Oh my god! That’s disgusting!”
“You’re welcome,” he laughed before starting to ask Mikey questions about something car-related.
Gia was now bored AND disgusted, so she announced that she’d go find Alicia, but neither of them heard her. Too occupied by the car. And it didn’t seem like they’d be going home any time soon, so might as well do something useful with her time.
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