Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Living a Lie: The Philosopher's Stone

Friends and Sortings

by Nooka 1 review

What if Harry was a girl? But, due to safety reasons, the Wizarding world thought she was a he? Follow Harry as she attempts to keep her secret in a new, and often strange, world.

Category: Harry Potter - Rating: PG - Genres: Humor - Characters: Draco, Hagrid, Harry, Lupin, Padma, Professor McGonagall - Warnings: [?] - Published: 2006-06-16 - Updated: 2006-06-16 - 2863 words

Hope you enjoy this chapter, I did writing it! Don't forget to review!

Disclaimer: There are some quotes from 'Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone' which, surprisingly, I don't'd that happen?

Thoughts emphasis/ book titles./


The girl smiled and held out her hand. "Padma Patil."

Harley grinned and shook her hand. "Harry Potter. Pleased to meet you!"

Padma's eyes widened. "Really?" she squealed.

Harley rolled her eyes. Thanks to Remus, she knew to expect something along these lines. She had hoped that her fame wouldn't get in the way of forming long lasting friendships. "Yeah, you're not a member of my fan club are you?" she asked with a smile.

Padma blushed. "Oh I'm sorry! It's just I wasn't expecting the Harry Potter to be the first friend I make." She grinned. "My sister is number 217 in your fan club, so beware!"

Harley looked shocked. She was just joking about the fan club! She didn't actually think she'd have one. Harley groaned. "This is gonna be a long year."

Padma laughed and patted her new friend on the shoulder in sympathy. "Yeah, I wouldn't want to be you when your fan club finds out that you're at Hogwarts this year."

Harley made a displeased face causing them both to burst out laughing. Harley leaned back in her chair. "So...what's your sister like?"

Padma sighed. "She's my twin and she's called Parvati, but she's the polar opposite of me. She's a gossip and is friends with this annoying witch next door to us called Lavender Brown. You got any annoying family members?"

"Yep. I've got this cousin called Dudley who's the same age as me and he's a royal pain in the arse, s'cuse my language."

Padma wrinkled her nose. "Dudley? What kind of a name is that?"

Harley smirked. "I think my Aunt and Uncle were temporally insane when they decided to call him that. I'm glad I didn't end up with a name like that!"

Padma smiled mischievously. "I don't know. I think a name like..." she pretended to size Harley up. "...Marmaduke would suit you!"

Harley shot Padma a fake shocked look and then smiled mischievously. "Well I think a name like..." she also pretended to size Padma up. "...Walburga would suit you!

They both looked at each other and burst out laughing. Harley wiped the tears from her eyes, put her right hand over her heart and held her left one up. "From this day forth, I Harry James Potter, shall be known as...Marmaduke."

Padma smiled and copied known as Marmaduke. "From this day forth, I Padma Amira Patil shall be known as...Walburga."

Harley did her best to look solemn. "So it hath been spoken, so let it be done!"

Suddenly the compartment door slid open to reveal a bushy haired girl dressed in her Hogwarts robes. "Has anyone seen a toad? Neville's lost his." She asked in a bossy voice.

Harley and Padma exchanged looks. Harley shook her head. "Nay brown haired one, we haven't." The girl looked at Harley as though she was insane and Harley shrugged. "I don't know your name so it's the next best thing."

Padma shrugged too. "Don't mind Marmaduke, his weirdness cannot be explained. I've given up trying."

"Riiiiiiiiiight." The bossy girl backed away from them. "Well if you happen to see a toad, just ask around for Neville Longbottom." She closed the door and walked away, muttering under her breath about weird witches and wizards.

Padma looked at Harley. "Methinks you freaked her out, Lord Marmaduke."

Harley nodded sagely. "I agree Lady Walburga, alas it cannot be undone." She pushed her fringe out of her eyes, revealing her lightening bolt shaped scar.

The door to the compartment opened again, this time revealing a blonde haired, grey eyed boy flanked by two dark haired boys. His eyes flickered up to Harley's forehead. "So it's true. Harry Potter has come to Hogwarts."

Harley raised an eyebrow, she didn't like him. He had a very...stuck up attitude. "And who, pray tell, are you?" she asked icily.

He smirked. "Draco Malfoy." He said, as though she would be impressed.

Padma narrowed her eyes and shot a look at Harley that clearly said 'watch your step' Harley nodded slightly. "I can't say that I've heard the name...have you Padma?"

Padma nodded. "The Malfoy's are one of the oldest families in Wizarding Europe."

Harley cocked her head to one side and regarded Draco Malfoy, who was stood in their compartment looking like he owned it, thoughtfully. "I see. Well I happen to know that the Potter's are an old family too."

Draco Malfoy sniffed. "Well you'll soon learn that some Wizarding families are better than others, Potter. You don't want to go making friends with the wrong sort. I can help you out there."

He held out his hand to Harley, who looked at it thoughtfully. "I appreciate that, Malfoy. However, I would like to see how the land lies before I commit myself."

Draco Malfoy nodded. "A wise decision, Potter. My offer will still be open when you make up your mind." He nodded to them and left the compartment with his bodyguards in tow.

Padma clapped her hands. "Well played, Lord Marmaduke!"

Harley bowed. "Thank you, Lady Walburga!"

The compartment door slid open again and in stepped the bossy girl from earlier just as a bunch of students ran past. She looked at them and smiled uncertainly.

"You'd best put your robes on, I've just been up to see the driver and he says that we're nearly there." She checked the corridor and slipped out quickly.

Harley looked at Padma in confusion. "And you say I'm weird."

Padma shrugged. "Well who am I to judge weirdness, Marmaduke?"

Harley nodded. "Too true...well I'm going to attempt to find my robe."

They rummaged through their trunks and pulled their robes on over their uniforms that they had been wearing since that morning. 'We will be arriving at Hogwarts shortly. Please leave your luggage on the train; it will be taken up to the school separately.'

Harley turned to Padma. "Well, this is it!"

"Yep, bottoms up!"

They laughed and joined the crowd in the corridor. The train slowed to a stop at a small, grey stone station. People made their way off the train and into the cool night air on the platform.

"Firs' years! Firs' years over here!" they followed the other first years over to a huge man with a bushy beard, holding a lantern. He looked around and nodded to himself in satisfaction. "Follow me. Mind yer step, now! Path is slippery."

They slipped and stumbled along the path, following the strange man and his lantern. They turned a corner and got their first sight of Hogwarts. The first years gasped in amazement at the sight of the majestic castle, sat on a mountain across a lake, which was to be their new home for the majority of the next seven years.

The man led them to a fleet of small boats by the shore of the lake. "No more'n four to a boat!" Padma and Harley climbed into a boat, followed by the bossy girl and a nervous looking lad holding a toad, who Harley suspected was the illustrious Neville Longbottom.

"Everyone in?" asked the man, looking around. "'K then...FORWARD!"

The boats glided across the dark lake towards the castle on the far side. The new students watched it approach with an air of nervous excitement. They floated through a wide opening in the mountain side and along a dark tunnel until they came to a stop at a small underground harbour. The first years clambered out and followed the man up a flight of stone stairs to a huge oak door. He knocked on the door three times.

The door opened to reveal a green robed, stern looking witch with her hair pulled back under her pointed hat.

"The firs' years, Professor McGonagall."

She nodded. "Thank you, Hagrid."

The man, Hagrid, left and Professor McGonagall led them through a large entrance hall to a door at the side of a pair of larger door behind which, Harley assumed, was the rest of the school. Professor McGonagall started a speech that Harley tuned out; she was more worried about the Sorting than the House points system. Besides, Professor Dumbledore and Remus had told her all about it. Eventually, Professor McGonagall left the first years and they immediately started whispering amongst themselves.

"So Harry, which house are you hoping for?" asked Padma.

Harley shrugged. "I don't know. My parents were in Gryffindor, so I wouldn't mind going there. What about you?"

"Hmmmm...Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff. I work hard you see, nothing like my gossipy sister yonder." She pointed to a girl identical to her who was giggling with another girl. Suddenly a bunch of people floated through the wall causing several people to scream.

Harley smirked and put on a scared whisper. "I see dead people!" Several muggleborns and half-bloods laughed at the comment, everyone else just looked confused.

"Thank you, Mr Potter. Alright everyone, form a line." The first years did so and followed Professor McGonagall into the Great Hall.

Harley looked around the hall in awe. It was huge and was lit by hundreds of floating candles and the ghosts, who were sat at four tables with the students. Looking up, Harley saw that there was no ceiling, the hall opened up to the heavens. "It's enchanted to look like the sky. I read about it in 'Hogwarts, a history.'" She heard the bossy girl say.

The line of first years stopped before a scruffy looking hat which, after a brief silence, began to sing.

'Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,

But don't judge by what you see,

I'll eat myself if you can find

A smarter hat than me.

You can keep your bowlers black,

Your top hats sleek and tall,

For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat

And I can cap them all.

There's nothing in your head

The Sorting Hat can't see,

So try me on and I will tell you

Where you ought to be.

You might belong in Gryffindor,

Where dwell the brave at heart,

Their daring, nerve and chivalry

Set the Gryffindors apart;

You might belong in Hufflepuff,

Where they are just and loyal,

Those patient Hufflepuffs are true

And unafraid of toil;

Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,

If you've a ready mind,

Where those of wit and learning

Will always find their kind;

Or perhaps in Slytherin

You'll make your real friends,

Those cunning folk use any means

To achieve their ends.

So put me on! Don't be afraid!

And don't get in a flap!

You're in safe hands (though I have none)

For I'm a Thinking Cap!'

The hall applauded and the Sorting Hat bowed to the four tables before going still. Professor McGonagall pulled out a roll of parchment and cleared her throat. "When I call you name, step forward and put the Sorting Hat on your head." She adjusted her glasses. "Abbott, Hannah."

Said girl stumbled out of the line and placed the hat on her head. "HUFFLEPUFF!" it shouted after a moments pause.

The Sorting ceremony continued, and then Draco Malfoy's name was called. Harley narrowed her eyes and watched his sorting in interest. The hat seemed to take a while to sort Draco. Harley noticed him grip the edges of the stool tightly when the hat gave its verdict. "GRYFFINDOR!" the hall fell completely silent and watched as Draco made his way towards the Lions Den and sit at the end, looking very uncomfortable.

"Patil, Padma!" Padma practically flew up to the stool and placed the hat carefully on her head. After a few seconds it declared. "RAVENCLAW!" her giggly sister was made a Gryffindor, much to Harley's surprise. Finally came Harley's turn.

"Potter, Harry." Immediately the hall filled with whispers.

"Potter did she say?"

"The Harry Potter?"

Harley put the hat on her head and scowled, she wasn't a weird creature from another planet to be stared at! Something chuckled in her head causing her to start.

'A Fiery one, eh? Oh don't worry, you aren't going insane. Now, lets see...hmmmm...interesting. Intelligent, loyal, hardworking and cunning. But not Slytherin, most certainly not. They're too cold and calculating for you. To cautious for Gryffindor, but you are brave when the situation calls for it. That leaves Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw. While I would like to put you in Hufflepuff, you are a little too outgoing and sarcastic for them. Yes...better be..."RAVENCLAW!"

She took off the hat and went to sit next to a cheering Padma, who happened to be the only one applauding. Everyone else was watching her in varying degrees of shock, none more so than the Gryffindor table. She shrugged and grinned at them.

Professor McGonagall recovered quickly and called out the next name on her list. "Randall, Jeffery."

The Sorting Ceremony carried on, but people were far more interested in either staring at Harley or whispering her placement amongst themselves. The Sorting finally finished with Zabini, Blaise being sorted into Slytherin; Professor McGonagall rolled up her scroll and took the hat away.

Professor Dumbledore stood up and spread his arms. "Welcome to another year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our feast, I would like to say a few words. And they are: Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak!"

There was a scattered applause and some laughter. "Wow, I wish I could confuse people like that."

"Marmaduke, remember what happened on the train?"

"Yeah, but that was one person."

Padma shook her head in despair. "Pass the potatoes, Harry."

Harley passed them to Padma and stared at the previously empty plates in shock. "How'd it do that?"

"Why, magic of course." Replied Padma with a smirk.

Harley glared. "Oh very funny. That's not what I meant."

"I know, but I couldn't resist."

"So how did they do it?"

Padma sighed and began to tell Harley all about house elves. The discussion continued throughout the meal until Professor Dumbledore stood up and clapped his hands for silence.

"Just a few more words now that we are all fed and watered. The First years should note that the Forbidden Forest has its name for a reason. It is out of bounds, a few older pupils should remember that also." His twinkling eyes flashed in the direction of a pair of red haired twins at the Gryffindor table.

"I have also been asked by our caretaker, Mr Filch, to remind you that no magic should be used in between classes in the corridors. Quidditch trials will be held in the second week of term. Anyone interested in playing for their house teams should talk to Madam Hooch. Finally, the third-floor corridor on the right-hand side is out of bounds to everyone who does not wish to die a slow and painful death. And now, bedtime. Off you trot."

The Ravenclaws followed their Prefect out of the hall. "I wonder what could be so dangerous about the third-floor."

Padma shrugged. "Dunno. I bet someone will find out before the end of the year though. Bet it's one of the Gryffindors."

They stopped at statue of a unicorn and the Prefect smiled at them. "This is the entrance to the Ravenclaw dormitories and the common room. The password is 'Dieu et Mon Droit', it changes every week and the new one is displayed on the notice board."

At the password the unicorn sprung aside and the Prefect led them inside. The common room was large and decorated in varying shades of blue. There were tables and comfy looking chairs strewn around and in the corners were big purple sofas. In the right hand wall was a huge wooden fireplace with a portrait of Rowena Ravenclaw smiling down at the students. Bookshelves, tapestries and doors to the dormitories lined the walls. The Prefect led them to two doors in the wall in front of them.

"The one on the left goes to the first-year girls' dorms and the one on the rights goes to the first-year boys' dorm. You'd best get some sleep because I'll be waking you up at seven tomorrow morning. Goodnight."

Padma and Harley said goodnight to each other and went their separate ways. Harley entered the dormitory with four other boys. Five four-poster beds with blue hangings and bedspreads sat along two walls. Three on the left and two on the right. On the wall directly in front of them were three huge windows with brown curtains.

Harley choose a bed on the right, pulled the curtains closed, changed into her pyjamas and said goodnight to her dorm mates. As she fell asleep she couldn't help but smile at the way her luck had turned.


Insert evil laugh here I am Soooo evil! Well, why not put Draco into Gryffindor? It's AU so might've happened. That doesn't mean that he'll turn into a nice person over night! Oh no, I have big plans for our Draco.

Review my preciouses and I shall reward you greatly!

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