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Thirty minutes later Brendon and I were sitting on his couch with all of the items necessary to mourn a broken could-have-been romance. Still Brendon hadn't asked a single question and I was extremely grateful. We had whiskey, pizza, munchies, and horror movies sitting in front of us.

Brendon took a giant swig of whiskey and made a face of disgust before grinning and grabbing a slice of pizza. "That mixture looks absolutely disgusting." I commented.

Brendon smiled and nodded, "Oh, it's an acquired taste."

I opened up the bag of Doritos we had gotten from the store and started munching on them, "So, what movie?"

I didn't hear his response. I immediately got lost staring down at a chip. Spencer wanted me to move in with him. Would that have been such a bad thing? Did I really have to decline his polite offer? Maybe he wasn't being as pushy as I imagined he was being... Why did I leave him there? ... Then he saw Brendon and now... Now things were just going to be terrible all over again.

"Uh, Kade?" Brendon finally snapped me from my thoughts.

I looked over to see him taking another drink of Whiskey. He extended the bottle to me, an innocent smile upon his lips. "Need a chaser?"

I took the bottle and slowly shook my head, taking a giant gulp. The alcohol burned as it slid down my throat and the taste was enough to make me gag but instead of asking for a chaser I simply took another gulp, letting the burning feeling take over where my guilt was resting.

After thirty five minutes our bottle of Whiskey was half way gone and the munchies were thrown everywhere on the ground with a movie playing loudly that neither of us were paying attention to. "Chocolate, where art thou?" Brendon called through the living room, stepping around the munchies.

I held up a kit kat bar, "I've found chocolate!" I declared, slurring slightly.

Brendon launched himself across the room and in to my lap, tackling me on to the couch. "Chocolate!" he yelled, cheerfully.

I laughed and flung the chocolate bar to the ground, away from us. Brendon leaned down and sniffed my lips, "You smell like chocolate."

I couldn't help but laugh at that statement, "I've been eating chocolate."

"And drinking whiskey. Yummy combination." Brendon replied, completely plastered.

"Want a taste?" I asked, flirting without meaning to. The liquor was getting to me and now all there was in the world was this occurrence. Just me. Just Brendon. His lips, so close. The smell of Whiskey causing me to crave more interaction.

Brendon leaned down, "I do." He whispered, staring in to my eyes with a pleading glance.

I leaned forward, my body pinned by his weight. Our lips met, but only for a moment. Brendon pulled back, seeming to realize that he was making a mistake. I grabbed him by his shirt and pulled him back to my lips. Once I let go I was breathing hard, the taste of Brendon's lips stained on to mine. "You don't do it on purpose but you make me shake-" I breathed out, closing my eyes. "Spencer."

Brendon laughed, the sound was uneasy. "Well, it's a good thing we don't like each other." He said, getting off of me, balancing himself on shaky legs.

"Yeah, good thing." I said, cheeks reddening quickly. "Um, may I have another drink?"

Brendon picked up the bottle of Whiskey, "Sure, I think I'm gonna need another shot too."

I watched as he took a giant gulp of the substance. Once the bottle was handed to me I mirrored his actions, wincing in disgust. The taste still hadn't faded.

Brendon dropped himself on to the couch next to me, taking the bottle for another drink. "So, you and Spencer?" He asked, casually. Then he groaned, "Well I mean, I knew that... I knew he liked you... I just don't know. I guess I got my signals mixed."

The horror slowly sunk in and I finally got the guts to speak, "You thought I was hitting on you?" I asked, hoping I was wrong. Brendon was a really nice guy but Spencer was... Spencer. He was the nicest, funniest, weirdest guy I'd ever met and I loved that about him.

Brendon sighed, "Yeah, well... I know I'm an idiot sometimes but I thought I had girls figured out."

I laughed, "You're charming in this light." I said, sarcastically.

Brendon rolled his eyes and grinned, "You know I don't mean it in a bad way."

"You don't mean that girls are all the same in a mean way? How about a sexist way?" I asked.

Brendon shook his head, "Too deep, way too deep. I'm drunk."

I laughed and nodded but secretly wished I was sitting next to Spencer. Spencer understood me when I said things like that. Spencer was able to get what I was saying and when I was joking. He was able to be deep while drunk, or buzzed or... whatever he had been at Ryan's.

"I'm sorry Brendon... I didn't mean to flirt with you." There was no point in arguing about it. I didn't need conflict anymore.

"You probably weren't. I'm a bit off sometimes." Brendon replied, "You and Spencer are going to be really cute together when you both stop being idiots and... get together." He said, glancing at me with a smirk.

I rolled my eyes, "I think I completely flipped out on him earlier over nothing."

"I was wondering why you called me to pick you up from your date. That usually doesn't happen." Brendon replied.

I sighed, "Yeah and him seeing you just... seemed to make him angrier."

"Well... Spencer has reason when it comes to that."

"What do you mean?" Was he going to take Spencer's side without even knowing the story?

"I've slept with four of Spencer's girlfriends." Brendon said, looking horrified with his own actions. "One of Ryan's and two of Jon's."

"Shit." I whispered, realizing now that it must have looked worse than I could of ever imagined. Spencer had to be... pissed, understandably.

"I know. I've been a douche in the past but I wouldn't do that with you." Brendon said softly.

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah, because you weren't just seconds from doing something with me before this conversation."

Brendon groaned, "Please don't be mad at me Kade. I'm a horny boy who happens to have no boundaries."

"Evidently." I sighed, "I'm not mad at you... I just really like you. You're a nice guy. I was hoping to be friends with you but... I'm not thinking that Spencer would see things in a positive light if I hung around with you."

"And that's all that is going to stop you from innocently hanging out with me?" Brendon asked.

I shook my head, "No but... we aren't kissing again. Okay?"

"Yes ma'am." Brendon replied.

"I really like Spencer."

"He really likes you." Brendon replied.

"I'm not so sure. I've fucked up a few times already... Is romance always this hard?" I was fairly new to dating.

"Yep." Brendon replied, "If it wasn't then what would make it fun?"

"The being together part?"

Brendon laughed, "So much more enjoyable after a nice game of broken heart."

I sighed and pulled my phone from my pocket, searching for Spencer's number. -Hi.- I texted, closing my eyes and hoping he would text back.

My phone buzzed quickly and I picked it up, reading Spencer's reply. -Low.-

-Can I help with that?- I asked.

-Have you already helped Brendon?-

I threw my phone down on to Brendon's floor. I didn't deserve that. Sure Brendon had slept with his previous girlfriends but I wasn't them. I was just me. I wasn't even dating Spencer anyway. I turned to Brendon, "I'm tired."

"Well Princess, let's go to bed." He said, grinning.

The next thing I knew I was being lifted from the couch. I was so glad when my body made contact with Brendon's bed seeing as how he had stumbled the whole way. I thought we were both going to end up on the floor.

Brendon's weight was upon me within seconds and I was gasping for air until he rolled off of me. I felt a sharp pain in my side and it took me over a minute to realize he was tickling me. Tears poured from my eyes as I attempted to escape his fingers. Brendon thought they were tears of laughter. I didn't like being tickled. He didn't understand that I wanted him to stop until my knee made contact with his crotch and he fell off of the bed in pain. "Oh fuck! Brendon, I'm so sorry." I called, crawling to the end of the bed.

Brendon weakly smiled up at me from the floor, "Ow." He offered.

I licked my lips and shot him an apologetic glance before standing, "More alcohol?" I asked.

"That's my kind of lady." Brendon joked.

I walked to the couch, picking up the almost empty bottle of whiskey. I noticed my phone was lit up, signifying another message but I ignored it and walked back to Brendon's bedroom. I didn't need to feel bad about myself anymore. I was going to do whatever I wanted to do and I didn't know what I wanted to do anymore... My lack of ability to make sense in my own mind was enough for me to realize that I was too drunk.

The rest of the night was a blur of laughing, alcohol, and lots of touching... I drifted to sleep with the feel of Brendon's skin against my own and the horrifying guilt of basically cheating on my non-boyfriend. It was enough to confuse me for the rest of my romantic life.