FicWad

Elladan had been out for most of the night, wandering outside in the gardens and then standing out on the bridge that spanned the river. His thoughts had been for the most part dark, but around midnight, he found himself recalling the words Legolas had spoken to him. Legolas had said that Estel wished to speak with him, that he harbored no anger. Could it be true? Was it possible that his brother would forgive him? Legolas had also said that Estel blamed himself, that he believed that Elladan was within his rights to be angry with him. The idea of his little brother passing from Middle Earth still believing that he was to blame for things he could not have hoped to control affected him deeply.

After a night of restless wandering and soul-searching, Elladan arrived at the door to his bedroom having come to the conclusion that whether Estel was angry with him or not was not the issue. In order for either of them to have peace, Elladan needed to face Estel. He stopped short when he saw that the door was already open. Not wishing to wake the rest of the house unless he was certain that something was amiss, Elladan stepped quietly inside. The moonlight was bright enough that it illuminated the room enough for him to see that his human brother lay unmoving on the floor.

Without a second thought, Elladan was on his knees beside the still form. "Estel! Estel, open your eyes!"

Estel groaned, his eyes remaining closed.

Elladan shook him gently. "Open your eyes, brother. You must awaken!"

Startled gray eyes opened wide, and the young ranger began to feebly push away Elladan's offer of assistance. Shaking his head, Elladan continued to help his brother into a sitting position. Estel's skin was cold to the touch ... he must have been lying on the floor for some time. Elladan pulled a blanket from his bed and wrapped it around Estel's shoulders.

"Elladan?"

"Yes, young one. It is Elladan. What happened? Are you all right?"

Estel looked down, unable to meet his brother's eyes. "I - I couldn't sleep."

Memory washed over the elf in waves as he remembered his human brother as a child. The heart that had broken when the Lady Celebrian departed for the Havens had broken further still when he found that Arathorn had been slain. When he had lifted the two-year-old Edain child into his arms, Elladan had felt the broken pieces begin to heal. The utter dependence of the child, the complete trust he placed in his rescuer had completely amazed him. When the child began to wail for his mother, Elladan had felt a common bond at once. Since that day, he had done everything in his power to comfort and guide the child, taking his role as older brother very much to heart. Many times, Estel had wandered into his room at night, upset from a dream or fearful of thunderstorms or strange noises. Of course, it had been many years since that had happened, as Estel was a man, albeit a young one, by human standards.

Until now. The terror and pain caused by the creature of Sauron had frightened both brothers far more than either would admit to any other, even Elrond. While Elladan had spoken to Elrohir and Estel had confided in Legolas, there was no way that anyone could truly understand what they had gone through unless they had experienced it for themselves.

Estel had not looked up, and Elladan had not replied. The young human's shoulders slumped in defeat, and he tried to rise. "I will go then, my brother. This was your home before it was mine. I would not cause you suffering." Again, he attempted to rise, but his body would not cooperate with him.

"I brought you to this place, Estel. I brought you here because I intended for you to stay. Ada decided to raise you because he wanted you here. If you left, I do not believe that he could bear it, not after all that has happened in recent times." Elladan helped Estel to his feet, then onto the bed. "I want you to lie down and get warm. The Valar know how long you were on the cold floor."

Estel did as his brother said, finding that he was quite glad to be back in a soft, warm bed. "You don't wish me to go?"

"Go? Estel, if anyone were to go, it should be me! You heard the things that were in my mind, you saw how I was! Can you truly say that you do not wish I were not here?"

In answer, Estel pushed himself up into a sitting position again and wrapped his arms around his brother as tightly as his wounds would allow. Emotion choked his voice as he fought against the sobs that threatened to wrack his body. "I was afraid, Elladan. I could not discern truth and reason from pain and fear. I know what that - that creature did to you. I know because it did the same to me." Estel took a long, shaky breath. "No, I do not want you to go. I never did. I thought you blamed me for making you relive your memories about your mother." He paused for a moment, pulling away. "Do you?"

Elladan responded automatically, just as he had reacted to Estel's distress when he had been a child. The elf returned the embrace, whispering words of comfort in Elvish until the human had calmed. "The memories of my mother are with me always. It happened long before you were born. I do not blame you for anything other than frightening all of us nearly unto death. So, now that we agree that neither wants the other to leave and that we do not blame each other, why don't we have that conversation we have needed to have since you first awakened?"

"I would like that." Estel smiled at his brother, and this time the smile reached his eyes. He felt as though a great weight had been rolled from his chest. The knowledge that he was not responsible for his brother's distress coming from Elladan himself was enough to assuage Estel's own worry. However, when the stress melted away, he suddenly realized how very exhausted and sore he was. His body sagged forward slightly, and Elladan gently helped him to lie back against the soft pillows.

"Tomorrow we will talk, brother. Now you must rest. You have used the very last of your strength tonight, I believe. Sleep, and I will let Ada know that you rest here rather than in your own chambers so he will not worry." Elladan felt the guilt and sadness that clouded his heart and mind begin to lift, and he could not resist reaching out to ruffle Estel's hair as he had when the ranger had been a child, a twinkle of mischief in his eyes that had previously held only pain. Estel batted feebly at his brother's hand with his good arm, feigning annoyance at the old habit, but quickly gave up protesting. Truthfully, he was so glad that his relationship with his brother had been repaired that he would gladly have put up with having his hair ruffled until he was old and gray.

Elladan sat up watching his brother sleep for a short while, just to ensure that Estel slept peacefully. When he finally rose to catch some sleep himself, he was surprised to find Elrohir and Legolas standing in the doorway.

"I take it that you have made your peace? Is all well between you and Estel?" Elrohir's face mirrored the concern in the Prince of Mirkwood's.

"Did he come to you? He could barely walk!" Legolas frowned at the sleeping form on Elladan's bed. "You and I will have words when you awaken, Estel. Words about why it is a bad idea to frighten the best archer in Middle Earth within an inch of his immortal life!" The golden-haired elf shook his head, laughing softly. "I went to look in on him, and he was gone. My heart was in my throat, I swear it. I didn't know if I should check the stables, the forest, or here first."

Elladan put a finger to his lips to indicate that they should speak softly because Estel was asleep. "We have made our peace, to answer the first question. As for the second, the answer is yes, he did come to me. I was not here, as I was out thinking on the wise words of a certain elf who shall remain nameless at this time. When I returned, I found him on the floor, unconscious. You say that your heart was in your throat when you discovered him missing? Nay, I felt sure that mine had hammered its way out of my chest when I saw him thus!"

As the three elves whispered to each other as they watched Estel sleep, Elrond and Gandalf watched unnoticed from the doorway for a moment before moving down the hallway to speak.

"So, your sons have reconciled. Surely that must have lightened your heart?"

Elrond nodded. "It does, Mithrandir. I feared for Elladan and Estel. They have been close since Estel came here to Rivendell."

Hesitantly, the wizard spoke. "Elrond, my old friend ... I do not wish to bring gloom to an otherwise happy occasion, but there is an unpleasant truth that you and I must face. The creature, the would-be wizard that Sauron sent? We do not know how much it managed to tell its master."

"What are you saying?" The Lord of Rivendell arched his eyebrows, fixing the Maiar with a look that was almost a glare.

Gandalf sighed. "I am saying that we must prepare ourselves for the possibility that Sauron might know who and where Estel is. Even if he is not yet certain, we must assume that he knows more than he did before. Other servants will be sent to ascertain the whereabouts and identity of Isildur's heir."

Elrond felt a strange, sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach, and he wondered briefly if that was what it felt like when Estel was ill. The idea of his human son in the kind of danger that Mithrandir was hinting at pained him greatly. The image of Estel struggling against his bonds as the orcs held him down and beat him would not be leaving Elrond's mind anytime soon. If Estel fell into the Dark Lord's hands, then hope would be lost.

So lost that not even Mithrandir or Elrond would be able to save him.

"What will you do, Elrond?"

Fierce determination filled the elf-lord's eyes. "I will wait until he has healed, and then I will tell him the truth, as you have told it to me. I will do all that I can to give him the resources he will need as he grows into his destiny. Most importantly, I believe, I will be sure to impress upon him that he is not alone. His family and his friends stand with him, no matter what the future holds."