Categories > Books > Harry Potter > Behind the Trash Can
When Pirates Attack
2 reviewsWhile taking out the trash, a business man discover something unexpected behind the trash cans
5Funny
Disclaimer: If I owned the Harry Potter series: A) I would be rich. B) Sirius would never have died in Book 5... although Dumbledore might have. *evil smirk*
Bad Author Notes: Ok this past year has been one hell of a ride and it did it's best to drain my love of writing from me but I'm finally start to bounce back and I hope to have the next chapter out sooner than I got this chapter out.
This is the last fluffy chapter for this fic; the next chapter is when things will really start to rock because Harry's going to get his letter.
When Pirates Attack
By Lady FoxFire
January 7, 2006
"So what's the mush of the day?" Sean asked as he dropped wearily into the kitchen chair, undoing the first few buttons of his uniform while Duke collapsed at Harry's feet.
Harry looked into the bowl he was holding. "I think its cereal, mashed plum, and milk," he said as he scraped a small spoon around the bowl.
"Sounds yummy," Sean replied as he tried to work the kinks out of his neck.
"Tina seems to like it," Harry replied as he shoved the small baby spoon in to the open mouth of the dark haired infant gurgling in the highchair.
Tina opened and closed her mouth quickly as she swallowed her breakfast before opening her mouth again and demanding more food.
Sean sat and watched Harry feed his baby sister in silence for a few moments, a contented smile of his face.
"So how was work?" Harry asked breaking the silence that had settled as he petted the sleeping dog with his bare feet.
Sean groaned. "Four hours of paper work for an arrest that took less than half hour."
Harry looked over at his father, an eyebrow raised questionably.
"A bad guy ran and Duke caught him," Sean replied as he stood up and walked over to the icebox to scrounge for edibles. "Where is your mother?" he asked, his head still in the fridge.
"In the shower," Harry replied with a chuckle.
"Mmph?" Sean's head pop out of the fridge, a chicken leg in his mouth.
"Tina had knocked her toy onto the floor, so Mum placed the bowl on the highchair and bent over...
"And splat?"
"Right on her head."
The two O'Connell men grinned like demons at each other.
"That's my girl," Sean said with pride as he kissed the baby on the head, never noticing the plum coloured smear that dribbled from her dirty hands onto his uniform, "a prankster just like your old man."
~*~
"Argh!" cried the pirate as he leapt into the living room, brandishing a sword in his hand.
The little pirate was dressed in a loose fitting long sleeve white shirt, striped pants, boots that came almost to his knees and to top it off, and a hat with the Jolly Roger emblazoned upon it.
"A pirate," Mary gasped. "What are we to do? Who will save us?"
"Give me you bootie and I'll leave you in peace," the pirate snarled as he pointed to a bowl sitting on the table next to Tina.
"Not the sweets!" Mary said as she scooped the bowl and tried to hide it behind her. "You can have anything but our candy,"
"Anything?" a deeper voice said a moment before a large pirate stepped into the room. Although dressed similarly to his smaller counterpart, this pirate also donned a leather vest and an eye patch over his left eye. His five o'clock shadow gave him even more of a rakish look.
Tina looked at the new pirate, then at her mother, before turning once more to the pirate. She let out a squeal of excitement.
"/Anything/, Mr. Pirate," Mary said breathlessly as she fluttered her eyes at him. "Just take what you please, Mr. Pirate, but leave us and our candy in peace."
"Mum," Harry said in exasperation at his parents' antics as he lowered his sword.
"Yes, Harry dear?" Mary said without broke her longing stare at the pirate captain.
Harry rolled his eyes at his parents. "Can I have some candy?"
"What do you say?" Mary asks, her eyes crinkled with amusement
Harry sighed. "May I please have some candy?"
"Hmmm," Mary hummed thoughtfully. "That's not what I was asking for."
Harry looked up at his mother for a moment in confusion before cracking into a toothy grin. "Trick or treat!" he exclaimed, his smile stretching from ear to ear.
"One piece," Mary said holding out the bowl full of candy to Harry.
"Thanks, Mum," Harry said as he picked his favorite from the bowl.
"Trick or treat!" Sean said with a big cheesy grin.
"Trick or treat," Mary said in a thoughtful manner as she tapped her chin with her finger. "Trick or treat."
Sean looked down at Harry, pulled up his eye patched and winked at Harry, he then stepped forward, grabbed Mary by the waist and swung her around so that only his strength stopped her from falling onto the floor. With a devilish smirk he kissed her soundly.
While Sean was busy sweeping Mary off her feet, Harry rescued the bowl of candy from a perilous plunge to the floor. With a quick glance at his kissing parents, Harry sneaked two more pieces from the bowl.
Swinging Mary back so that she was standing upright, Sean said, "Trick, my proud beauty."
Tina raised her arms up to Sean, her hands opening and closing as she made smooching noises.
"Ah you want some kiss too, my little beauty?" Sean said as he scooped up the baby and showered her with kisses as she squealed in delight.
Mary blinked once, twice, three times before taking an unsteadily breath.
"Now Harry," Mary said as Harry shoved the gumdrop into his mouth, "I do not want a repeat of what happened last year. Do you understand?"
Harry nodded his head, swallowing the candy before his mum noticed. "Yes, Mum."
"So I expect you to keep you father out of trouble this year," Mary said while giving Sean a death glare, "which means no toilet paper on any of the houses or trees. He's to have nothing to do with eggs, corn, or anything explosive. And you must absolutely keep your father away from Mrs. McKinney's dog. I do not want a repeat of what happened last year."
"I didn't do anything to Mrs. McKinney's dog!" Sean said in his defense.
Mary crossed her arms over her chest and glared at her husband.
"I didn't," Sean said. "I was nowhere near Mrs. McKinney's dog."
Mary raised an eyebrow.
Sean wilted under Mary's glare. "I didn't do anything." Sean whined. "Thomas and Jeff were the ones who did it. I was just the look out."
Mary just shook her head at her husband.
"We didn't know," Sean said as he shuffled his feet. "The cans said that the stuff comes out with two washes. We didn't know that the dog would stay green."
Mary pinched the bridge of her nose. "Just keep him out of trouble."
"I'll try mum," Harry said as he popped another lemon drop into his mouth.
Bad Author Notes: Ok this past year has been one hell of a ride and it did it's best to drain my love of writing from me but I'm finally start to bounce back and I hope to have the next chapter out sooner than I got this chapter out.
This is the last fluffy chapter for this fic; the next chapter is when things will really start to rock because Harry's going to get his letter.
When Pirates Attack
By Lady FoxFire
January 7, 2006
"So what's the mush of the day?" Sean asked as he dropped wearily into the kitchen chair, undoing the first few buttons of his uniform while Duke collapsed at Harry's feet.
Harry looked into the bowl he was holding. "I think its cereal, mashed plum, and milk," he said as he scraped a small spoon around the bowl.
"Sounds yummy," Sean replied as he tried to work the kinks out of his neck.
"Tina seems to like it," Harry replied as he shoved the small baby spoon in to the open mouth of the dark haired infant gurgling in the highchair.
Tina opened and closed her mouth quickly as she swallowed her breakfast before opening her mouth again and demanding more food.
Sean sat and watched Harry feed his baby sister in silence for a few moments, a contented smile of his face.
"So how was work?" Harry asked breaking the silence that had settled as he petted the sleeping dog with his bare feet.
Sean groaned. "Four hours of paper work for an arrest that took less than half hour."
Harry looked over at his father, an eyebrow raised questionably.
"A bad guy ran and Duke caught him," Sean replied as he stood up and walked over to the icebox to scrounge for edibles. "Where is your mother?" he asked, his head still in the fridge.
"In the shower," Harry replied with a chuckle.
"Mmph?" Sean's head pop out of the fridge, a chicken leg in his mouth.
"Tina had knocked her toy onto the floor, so Mum placed the bowl on the highchair and bent over...
"And splat?"
"Right on her head."
The two O'Connell men grinned like demons at each other.
"That's my girl," Sean said with pride as he kissed the baby on the head, never noticing the plum coloured smear that dribbled from her dirty hands onto his uniform, "a prankster just like your old man."
~*~
"Argh!" cried the pirate as he leapt into the living room, brandishing a sword in his hand.
The little pirate was dressed in a loose fitting long sleeve white shirt, striped pants, boots that came almost to his knees and to top it off, and a hat with the Jolly Roger emblazoned upon it.
"A pirate," Mary gasped. "What are we to do? Who will save us?"
"Give me you bootie and I'll leave you in peace," the pirate snarled as he pointed to a bowl sitting on the table next to Tina.
"Not the sweets!" Mary said as she scooped the bowl and tried to hide it behind her. "You can have anything but our candy,"
"Anything?" a deeper voice said a moment before a large pirate stepped into the room. Although dressed similarly to his smaller counterpart, this pirate also donned a leather vest and an eye patch over his left eye. His five o'clock shadow gave him even more of a rakish look.
Tina looked at the new pirate, then at her mother, before turning once more to the pirate. She let out a squeal of excitement.
"/Anything/, Mr. Pirate," Mary said breathlessly as she fluttered her eyes at him. "Just take what you please, Mr. Pirate, but leave us and our candy in peace."
"Mum," Harry said in exasperation at his parents' antics as he lowered his sword.
"Yes, Harry dear?" Mary said without broke her longing stare at the pirate captain.
Harry rolled his eyes at his parents. "Can I have some candy?"
"What do you say?" Mary asks, her eyes crinkled with amusement
Harry sighed. "May I please have some candy?"
"Hmmm," Mary hummed thoughtfully. "That's not what I was asking for."
Harry looked up at his mother for a moment in confusion before cracking into a toothy grin. "Trick or treat!" he exclaimed, his smile stretching from ear to ear.
"One piece," Mary said holding out the bowl full of candy to Harry.
"Thanks, Mum," Harry said as he picked his favorite from the bowl.
"Trick or treat!" Sean said with a big cheesy grin.
"Trick or treat," Mary said in a thoughtful manner as she tapped her chin with her finger. "Trick or treat."
Sean looked down at Harry, pulled up his eye patched and winked at Harry, he then stepped forward, grabbed Mary by the waist and swung her around so that only his strength stopped her from falling onto the floor. With a devilish smirk he kissed her soundly.
While Sean was busy sweeping Mary off her feet, Harry rescued the bowl of candy from a perilous plunge to the floor. With a quick glance at his kissing parents, Harry sneaked two more pieces from the bowl.
Swinging Mary back so that she was standing upright, Sean said, "Trick, my proud beauty."
Tina raised her arms up to Sean, her hands opening and closing as she made smooching noises.
"Ah you want some kiss too, my little beauty?" Sean said as he scooped up the baby and showered her with kisses as she squealed in delight.
Mary blinked once, twice, three times before taking an unsteadily breath.
"Now Harry," Mary said as Harry shoved the gumdrop into his mouth, "I do not want a repeat of what happened last year. Do you understand?"
Harry nodded his head, swallowing the candy before his mum noticed. "Yes, Mum."
"So I expect you to keep you father out of trouble this year," Mary said while giving Sean a death glare, "which means no toilet paper on any of the houses or trees. He's to have nothing to do with eggs, corn, or anything explosive. And you must absolutely keep your father away from Mrs. McKinney's dog. I do not want a repeat of what happened last year."
"I didn't do anything to Mrs. McKinney's dog!" Sean said in his defense.
Mary crossed her arms over her chest and glared at her husband.
"I didn't," Sean said. "I was nowhere near Mrs. McKinney's dog."
Mary raised an eyebrow.
Sean wilted under Mary's glare. "I didn't do anything." Sean whined. "Thomas and Jeff were the ones who did it. I was just the look out."
Mary just shook her head at her husband.
"We didn't know," Sean said as he shuffled his feet. "The cans said that the stuff comes out with two washes. We didn't know that the dog would stay green."
Mary pinched the bridge of her nose. "Just keep him out of trouble."
"I'll try mum," Harry said as he popped another lemon drop into his mouth.
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