Categories > Celebrities > Panic! At The Disco > The Diary Of Ryan Ross

Part Deux

by CandyCaneEmmi 2 reviews

Once again, R for language.

Category: Panic! At The Disco - Rating: R - Genres: Drama,Humor - Published: 2012-03-20 - Updated: 2012-03-20 - 1075 words

A/N: So, today's my 18th birthday, and I've got time to kill for a while before me and my friends go out and celebrate. So, I wrote this. Enjoy!

Sunday October 16th

Went to counseling. It didn't completely suck ass.

Dad was pissed today. Really pissed. I was dumb, for acting like an ass, when I know I'm gonna get hit. But I just wasn't expecting him to explode like he did.

He grabbed my neck and tried to strangle me. You know, for what it's worth, I wasn't as scared as I should have been. Dad was angry, yeah, but he was also drunk, so his thoughts were a mess and he didn't have as much upper body strength as usual. And for some reason, I just didn't care if he choked me.

Part of me wanted him to send me to the hospital. Part of me wanted him to keep squeezing. Good thing the other part wanted him to let the fuck go and I kicked the old geezer in the shin and ran for it to my room. He hasn't bothered me again.

Still. The bruises are dark. Gross, purplish green looking ones. I can't cover them with make-up. This sucks ass.

Funny thing is that Dad got mad that I mentioned my friends. I was trying to let dad know it was okay here, and he says, "What about school? You doing good work?" I failed to notice that was his seventh beer but I guess I just wasn't in my right mind.

"Fuck no. The teachers can suck a dick for all I care."

And Dad went off. I don't care, though. I don't give a shit about ma or dad or anyone in this goddamned hellhole called my fucking life. I just don't give a shit.

Monday October 17th

Girl with black lipstick is still staring at me.

I still don't know her name.

Carrie says she likes this guy DJ or something like that. He's a junior apparently… so why the hell Carrie would think us, little freshman, would ever be spared a glance I have no freaking idea.

The table was normal at lunch, with lots of complaints and angry comments from Carrie, random quips from black lipstick chick and then Spencer had to ruin it.

"Where did you get those bruises?" He was sitting beside me, and he lifted a hand to touch it. I didn't flinch away and let him lay his hand there for some reason. The touch didn't hurt like I thought it would.

There was no humor on Spencer's face. He looked troubled. I didn't hesitate. "Street fight. Some assholes cornered me." I let a few seconds pass before tilting my head up. "I kicked their asses though."

Carrie snorted. "Great job at that." She spat, pointing to the bruises on my neck.

Both Carrie and black lipstick girl showed concern over the whole thing but Spencer didn't speak another word for the rest of the day.

He doesn't believe me. Not one bit.

Tuesday October 18th

DJ sat with us today, so I guess he's in the group now. Carrie keeps making weird faces when he talks and just coos at his every move.

Dude is a total wimp. Pretty cool though. He's built like a freight train and plays on the basketball team. He asked if I wanted to join, and I said yeah. Also he gets along really well with Spencer, so he's cool.

Oh yeah. And her name is Greta,

Or Gretchen.

Something like that.

So anyway, Spencer and I were in English, joking about how the teacher's teeth were jacked, when he looks at me with a weak smile. "Was it your dad?"

I scowled at him. Obviously, he was back on the subject of the stupid bruises. "So what if it was?"

He just looked to the board and shrugged. "I have make-up that can cover it. At my house. You can always come there if you need some."

The bell rang so I didn't get to see his face, but I'm pretty sure Spencer was telling me that, if I was in trouble, I had a safe place to come to.

Pssh. Not like I'd wanna stay at some fag house anyway. Probably would rape me in my sleep or something.

Wednesday October 19th

At counseling today, Chris asked about my friends again. "Have you made anymore?"

I shrugged. "There is this guy DJ who Carrie likes. He's a pussy but he's pretty cool." Considering I don't know much about DJ, I don't really label him as a friend. Just another dude, or Carrie's crush I guess.

Chris nodded and asked if there was anyone else.

I thought about it, and then I chewed my lip. "There is this chick, Greta. But she's weird…"

"How so?"

"She stares at me. Like… a lot. It's creepy."


It was quiet for a bit then I look up. "Spencer is annoying."

Chris looked interested so I continued. "He keeps getting in my business and acting like he's worried about me."

Chris smiled. "Maybe because he actually is?"

At that, I was caught off guard, but I let out a growl. "Yeah right. As if that could ever happen."

Last thing that would ever happen is anyone giving a shit about my dumbass.

Thursday October 20th

Carrie said we should all go to the movies tomorrow. Obviously she's just trying to get closer to DJ, but I didn't call her out on it.

It was just me and her walking in the hall when she brought it up. "Yeah, and me and DJ could go together…" She faded off for a second before nudging my shoulder. "And maybe… you and Greta?"

I nearly fell over in surprise and shot her a look. "Uh… what…" I rolled my eyes and blinked a few times. "I'm not double dating for your sake. Besides, Spencer will probably wanna come to."

I don't know why she wanted to leave Spencer out. She liked him more than she could stand me. If anything, I was surprised she didn't ask Spencer to come and ask to leave me sitting in the dust.

She sighed audibly and looked mildly disappointed, but I blew her off because we were going to be late for lunch. "Come on! DJ is waiting for you!" I sing-songed. And I couldn't help but laugh as she growled after me.
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